Encouragement for Today

[Judy Harder]

February 23, 2010

Is Your Spouse Your Best Friend?

Melanie Chitwood

"Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.  For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion.  But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up."  Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NAS)

Devotion:

Although I can say today that my husband Scott is my best friend, that hasn't always been the case. When we first were married, I was so close to my twin sister that Scott felt excluded when the three of us were together. Gradually, however, we both learned to develop our friendship with one another.

We reached a big turning point when we left Atlanta, where I had been single and then newly married, and moved to Florida for Scott's new flying career. Living in a new city where we knew few other people, we learned to depend on each other for friendship in a way we hadn't learned before.

Scott now is the one I turn to first just to be my friend, not in the way a girlfriend is a friend, but in a way that only a husband can be. The support that this kind of friendship brings is reflected in Ecclesiastes 4:9: "Two are better than one."

What are some specific ways we can develop a close friendship with our spouse?  First, we can take note of what's going on where we each spend a great deal of time, the workplace  Has he talked about a stressful project?  Has she said how energized she is by a new assignment? Follow up by asking for more details and remember to pray for these situations.  This shows your thoughtfulness and support.  If she's a full-time homemaker, acknowledge that you know her job never ends and that you appreciate her.

Secondly, a great way to forge bonds of friendship is to share an interest. What do you both like to do? You may need to think about what you did while you were dating.  Our friends Tracey and Ron take short trips to the mountains. It's more Tracey's passion than Ron's, but he's learned to enjoy it too.  My mom and dad are great cooks and have created some incredible meals together.  Scott and I have watched countless basketball games together. If you don't already have a shared hobby or pastime, start trying out some activities.  It's easy to let the day-in and day-out responsibilities of life to crowd out time for relaxation and laugher, so you'll have to make the choice to have fun together.

Finally, we need to ask ourselves if we're making friendship with our spouse a priority.  Do we save our best energy for developing friendship with our spouse or are we too busy?  Sometimes we have to say no to other pursuits so we can have time to protect and nurture the gift of friendship in marriage.

The seeds of friendship we plant today will continue to bloom later in our marriages. We've all seen older couples sitting at restaurant tables, eating their entire meal in complete silence.  I don't want to look like those silent couples, and I'm sure you don't either. I want to grow old relishing my friendship with my husband, a friendship forged over years of sharing interests and making each other a priority.

Dear Lord, Show me ways to nurture friendship with my spouse, so we can continue to enjoy each other through the passing years.  Lord, today, I commit to making friendship with my spouse one of my top priorities.  Where I need to give up some activities so I'll have time for friendship with my husband, give me eyes to see that.  Thank you for the lifetime friendship you've given us in marriage.  In Jesus name, Amen.

Related Resources:

What a Husband Needs from His Wife by Melanie Chitwood

This devotion was adapted from What a Wife Needs from Her Husband.  Order your copy today!

Visit Melanie's blog - What Matters Most for more marriage encouragement.

Application Steps: 

Plan to do something fun with your spouse. Do this within one week's time, and don't let anything interfere with these plans.

Reflections: 

What do you want your marriage to look like ten years from now?  What can you do today to reach your desired outcome?

Is there room in your life for friendship with your spouse?  Is there anything you can take out of your life to allow space for your friendship with your spouse to grow?

Power Verses:

Genesis 2:18, "Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone;  will make him a helper suitable for him.'" (NAS)

Ephesians 5:28, "So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies.  He who loves his own wife loves himself."

© 2010 by Melanie Chitwood. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries

616-G, Matthews-Mint Hill Road

Matthews, NC 28105

www.proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

February 24, 2010

God's Cleats

Rachel Olsen

"Wisdom and money can get you almost anything, but only wisdom can save your life."  Ecclesiastes 7:12 (NLT)
     
Devotion:

The Vancouver Olympics have me glued to my TV. Figure skating, downhill skiing, snowboarding, even curling - I'll watch most any Olympic sport. I relish the competition, the teamwork, the medal ceremonies, and especially the stories of athletes overcoming odds to perform well. 

In fact, it reminds me a little of my husband Rick.

My husband grew up with a single mother, and very little money.  In high school, Rick wanted to try out for track and field - he dreamed of running fast and long, and throwing a javelin.  The problem was he didn't have the right shoes, and couldn't afford them.  Thank God for good friends and a kind coach. 

One of Rick's close friends invited Rick over to his house one day and said, "Try these running shoes on. They just don't fit my feet right and I'll never wear them."  Rick wasn't sure if J.T. was telling the truth, but the shoes fit Rick fine.  Those shoes helped him qualify for the state meet in the 800 meter race. 

Running shoes allowed Rick to run much faster than his old sneakers would, but he would slip and slide in them while trying to throw the javelin. One day after practice, Rick's coach called him over and held up a big box of cleats.  "Here's some unclaimed shoes students left in their lockers at the end of the school year. Find your size if you can." Rick found some that fit and the cleats made all the difference.  Even the "crunching" sound they made on the track sent shivers of confidence and purpose up Rick's spine.  Rick discovered it's much easier to strive for the goal when your footing is secure.

Many athletes dream of standing atop a podium during an awards ceremony with gold medals around their necks.  For most, it takes talent, hard work, plus money to get there.  But there is an ornament even more valuable than a gold medal. Proverbs 3:21-23 reveals:

"My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment, do not let them out of your sight; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck.  Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble."

Sound judgment and discernment are medals that become ours when we walk in wisdom.  Money can take us places, for sure, but it can only take us so far. It provides but a measure of security. Wisdom is the footwear each of us needs to run the race God has set before us.  Wisdom will help us make the important trek from this world into eternity.

When we walk in His wisdom - in God's cleats - He promises us solid footing.  He does not promise a road that is always flat, or a route that is easy to run, but He promises us solid footing no matter the terrain.  Wisdom - proper respect for the Lord and His ways - affords us ultimate security. Eternal security.  Money can't do that.

Rick went on to compete successfully in high school, and on his college cross-country team. He also went on to gain godly wisdom. I'm so thankful for the friends and coaches that ensured Rick had what he needed to run his best. 

God ensures - through the Bible, His followers, and His Spirit within us - that we each have what we need to run our best as well.  He equips us to follow hard after Him. No money is necessary to be well-heeled in God's kingdom. Whether we're wearing nursing shoes, work boots, high heels, hand-me-downs, or flip-flops, we can walk securely by walking wisely.

Dear Lord, grant me wisdom and sure footing as I follow after You. I trust You to equip me with all I need. Whatever my path, I believe Your principals can keep me from slipping. You lead, I'll follow. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Do You Know Him?

Visit Rachel at her blog today to chat about how God equips us with what we need.

All I Need is Jesus & a Good Pair of Jeans by Susanna Foth Aughtmon

Walk with Me Today, Lord: Inspiring Devotions for Women by Emilie Barnes

Application Steps: 

Consider what you usually walk in - fear? anger? depression? doubt? discontentment? a big hurry?

Reflections: 

Who in your life can coach you in the ways of wisdom?

Who can help you "find your size" and follow after Him?

Power Verses:

Proverbs 4:7, "Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment." (NLT)

Proverbs 2:6, "For the Lord grants wisdom! From his mouth come knowledge and understanding." (NLT) 

© 2010 by Rachel Olsen. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G, Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

February 25, 2010

Trusting In Princes

Marybeth Whalen

"It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in princes."

Psalm 118:9 (NIV)
       
Devotion:

I had looked forward to this moment for days. I sat across the table from my friend and poured out my heart about a big decision I had to make. As I looked into her eyes, I just knew she would have the wisdom I needed. I waited expectantly for her advice.

Instead of an answer to my problems I got a mini sermon. One I needed to hear. My friend pointed out that I was looking to the answer and not the Source of all answers. I thought if I just made the right choice, I would solve all my own problems. "You need to take your focus off making the right decision and trust God," she said. "No matter what you decide to do, He will still take care of you and He will accomplish His purpose for you." (from Psalm 138:

I nodded soberly. My friend was right. I had gotten caught up in the outcome. I was placing my trust in princes—looking to people and circumstances for the answers—instead of accepting the truth that, no matter what decision I made, God was going to take care of me. I had made the decision so uber-important that it had eclipsed God's place in my life.

I had prayed to make the right decision. I had journaled pages to Him about it. But ultimately, I reasoned, since He hadn't written the solution in the skies for me, I had to make my own choice based on what I felt was right. I had forgotten that He would still be there working all things together for my good after I made the decision, just as He had before.

If you are facing a big or little decision in your life, seek Him above all. Don't let the outcome or the opinions of others become more important that the One who "opens His hands and satisfies the desires of every living thing." (Psalm 145:16)

No matter whether you make the right decision or the wrong one, He will still be there walking with you, loving you, and helping you. Pray about your decision. Read His word. Seek out godly counsel. And then make the best decision you can. Sometimes the biggest decision is to simply make one. Place your trust in Him and rest in the fact that He will meet you on the other side of whatever decision you make.
                                                                                                                                                                       
Dear Lord, thank You that because of Your grace I know You will always be there. Thank You for the promise in Romans 8:28 that You will work all things out for good. I pray that my life brings You glory and I trust You to work in all circumstances to make that happen. Help me to place my trust in You and not in princes. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Do You Know Him?

The Reason We Speak General Editor Marybeth Whalen

Visit Marybeth Whalen's blog

For the Write Reason General Editor Marybeth Whalen

Application Steps: 

Look up Psalm 57:2 and Psalm 100:3, and write them in your journal. Spend time reflecting on these verses and how they apply to your life today.

Reflections: 

Are you trusting Him to work out His purposes for you today? Are you offering up whatever decisions you must make or steps you must take to Him and letting Him take care of the rest?

What "princes" in your life are throwing you off track?

Power Verses:

Psalm 146:3, "Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save." (NIV) 

Psalm 60:11, "Give us aid against the enemy, for the help of man is worthless." (NIV)


© 2010 by Marybeth Whalen. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries

616-G, Matthews-Mint Hill Road

Matthews, NC 28105

www.proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

February 26, 2010

Faithfulness and a Coffee Table

Lynn Cowell

"In that room were a gold incense altar and a wooden chest called the Ark of the Covenant, which was covered with gold on all sides. Inside the Ark were a gold jar containing manna, Aaron's staff that sprouted leaves, and the stone tablets of the covenant." Hebrews 9:4 (NLT)
       
Devotion:

To most, it is just a coffee table. A table that has seen better days, and is maybe slightly out of fashion. But to her it is an altar of sorts. The coffee table is the place where she found Him; the day she received a new life in Jesus.

My mom has looked for new tables. Ones that match her decor. Ones that turn into spiffy serving tables. Ones with glass for displaying things of beauty. But still the old table remains.

The table serves as a reminder. A reminder of the things that God has done. A reminder of His faithfulness. A reminder of what He can do and lives that He can change.

The Israelites had reminders too. Hebrews 9:4 tells us that in the temple, in the Most Holy Place there was a gold incense altar and a wooden chest called the Ark of the Covenant. Inside this ark was a gold jar containing manna, Aaron's staff that sprouted leaves, and the stone tablets of the covenant. All reminders. Reminders of things that God had done. Reminders of His faithfulness. Reminders of what He can do.

I am a person of change. I love new things. My husband and I were recently strolling the aisles of Home Depot and as we passed my favorite counter I announced, "I love paint." "You love paint?" he repeated. "Yes! I love the change that comes with new paint; new color." I don't care to buy expensive things like designer purses or diamond jewelry; things I feel I have to keep. Things I feel I have to use. I like things that I can change.

But this verse reminds me of the importance of "old things." The importance of the things in our past that remind us of God's faithfulness. My things: The dishes that remind me of my grandparent's marriage - one that was full of true unconditional love that lasted a life time. The marred chairs around my table that were for our "new" home when my now eighteen year-old son was crawling. The quilt in my bedroom, handmade to keep my mother warm in the wagon on those below freezing Minnesota mornings as a child. Piles of scrapbooks that document the life that Greg and I have built with our children. All of these testify that though life is hard, God is good.

I haven't told her yet, but I hope that one day Mom's coffee table will be a reminder in my home. You see, it is by that coffee table that I knelt with my mama as a young girl and began my new life with Jesus. Nothing on this earth would bring me joy more than to one day kneel by that table with another young girl and continue with the memories it holds
                                                                                                                                                                         
Dear Lord, I need to be reminded daily of Your faithfulness. Reminders such as these give me hope; hope that as You have been for all time, You will be faithful again today and tomorrow. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Do You Know Him?

Family Enrichment Toolkit

Dwelling: Living Fully from the Space You Call Home by Marybeth Lagerborg

Visit Lynn's blog for more encouragement today.

Application Steps: 

What in your surroundings remind you of God's goodness and faithfulness in your life?

What change can you bring to your environment that would invoke positive thoughts about God? Are there things in your home that you need to give a more prominent place? Are there things in your home that you need to remove because they cause you to have negative thoughts?

Take some time to attach positive stories to the things in your home with your children. The stories are in your mind, but our children need to hear them so that they too can build a history with God.

Reflections: 

What are some specific times in your life when you saw God's faithfulness first hand?

Are you a "new" thing girl or "old"? Do you make a habit of reminding yourself of His goodness?

Power Verses:

Joshua 4:7 "Tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever."" (NIV) 


Exodus 34:6, "And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, "The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness," (NIV)


Psalm 36:5, "Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies." (NIV)

© 2010 by Lynn Cowell. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries

616-G, Matthews-Mint Hill Road

Matthews, NC 28105

www.proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

March 1, 2010

Too Many Eyes

Christa Parrish, She Reads Featured Author

"But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body."

1 Corinthians 12:18-20 (NIV)
       
Devotion:

When I was twenty, my boyfriend said to me, "Christa, you're just not feminine enough," and he ended our relationship.  I was devastated, not only because I loved him, but because I had been bombarded with the not enough message for the past three years, since I had become a Christian. 

Those at the church I attended, while deeply committed to following God, had definite ideas about what a "good Christian woman" looked liked.  I wasn't it.  So I strove to throw off the "old" me. I read the right books and listened to the right speakers, and followed carefully constructed do and don't lists.  And finally I gained acceptance in the church, but had completely lost myself - any shred of individuality.

I was just another eye (1 Corinthians 12:17) in a crowd of eyes.

For all the proper clothes and activities and friends, I found myself heavy with shame because there were still huge pieces inside of me that wouldn't squish into the "good Christian" mold held out for me.  I prayed to be more like this woman or that woman, until one day I realized the only person I should be praying to be like was Jesus.  Once I turned my sight to Christ, I began to see how my differences could be of value to Him.  The more I became like Him, the more I became the person He made me to be.

My husband continually tells me, usually in response to some quirky idea I have, "I always want you to be who you are," and I hear the Lord's voice in those words.  God is glorified through His people, and trying to shake off the personality with which He created us is dishonoring to Him.  Each of our unique talents, idiosyncrasies, and abilities can and should be used for Him, and I've learned over and over again God will put us in situations that require just the skills and personality traits He has given us.

In my most recent novel, Watch Over Me, the main characters feel as if they are on the "fringe" of the church body, unable to fit in.  For Abbi, it's because of her personal convictions; for Benjamin, it's because of the pain he's carrying around inside him; and for Matthew, it's a physical disability.  But all three of them come to realize they are all necessary parts of the body of Christ.  They - we - are the eyes and ears and feet and noses.  Each of us fills a role in Christ's church, and in the lives of those around us, placed there by God to serve and love one another in our differences.
                                                                                                                                                                         
Dear Lord, You have created each of us in Your image, and also uniquely us.  Help us to embrace who You made us to be, to see clearly the strengths You've given us, and rejoice in them.  Use our individual weaknesses to turn us to You each and every day, giving us reason to cling to Your promises.  Allow us opportunities to use our talents for Your glory and the good of the people around us, both those who are part of Your body and those who do not yet know You.  Let our uniqueness be a light for You in the darkness.  In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Do You Know Him?

Watch Over Me by Christa Parrish

Visit P31's She Reads site to learn more about Christa and enter to win a copy of her latest novel Watch Over Me.  A grand prize winner will receive a copy of the novel along with a beautiful handmade vase from Arizona Pottery.  A runner up will receive a copy of the novel as well.

Youniquely Woman: Becoming Who God Designed You To Be by Kay Arthur, Emilie Barnes, Donna Otto

Application Steps: 

Reach out to someone in your church who may feel like she's on the "fringe" of things and doesn't fit in with the other women. Take time to encourage her uniqueness in Christ.

Take a few minutes to think about the talents God has given you.  If there are some you aren't using now, ask yourself why that is.  Go to the Lord in prayer and see if He reveals a way for you to serve Him with these abilities.

Reflections: 

Do you suppress certain parts of yourself because you're worried about what other people may think?  How can you overcome this "fear of man" that can prevent you from being all God made you to be?   

Have you ever wished you could be more like another woman you know, because she seems more Godly?  In what ways can you focus more on becoming "Christ-like" rather than "other-like"?   
Power Verses:

Ephesians 2:10, "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." (NIV)

1 Corinthians 12:4-6, "There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but the same God works all of them in all men." (NIV)

Jeremiah 1:5a, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart." (NIV)

© 2010 by Christa Parrish. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries

616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road

Matthews, NC 28105

www.proverbs31.org

 

[Judy Harder]

March 2, 2010

Hope in the Rubble

Lynn Cowell

"I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength" Ephesians 1:18 (NIV)
       
Devotion:

Mind-boggling devastation filled the screen. I just couldn't wrap my mind around everything that had taken place by the earthquake in Haiti. Such suffering and pain. I went to sleep with the images firmly planted in my mind and heart.

When I awoke in the morning, I began to pray before my feet hit the ground: prayer for miracles, supplies and those who would arrive in that precious country to serve and minister to the broken. A picture of a crying baby being pulled from the rubble came to mind. After over 48 hours of no food, no water and being trapped under a collapsed house, the 18 month-old was rescued. It was truly a miracle.

My prayers moved from the Haitian crisis to praying for a loved one who has gone astray. The one I love has much in common with the newly rescued baby. He too is trapped. Trapped by the weight and destruction of bad decisions and flawed thinking patterns. What seemed like a common path many were taking led to a place of destruction.

What this precious baby and my loved one do not have in common is the desire to be free. The baby sensed something was wrong. Where was her family? Where was food and water? Why wasn't someone coming to her rescue? Such thoughts occupied her tiny immature mind. My loved one has yet to discover that he indeed needs rescuing. He has yet to recognize the weight of selfishness, unforgiveness and self-destruction pressing on him.

Do you have one you desperately love who is heading toward destruction and doesn't realize it? Do you have days when the rubble of sin seems too heavy- too much to be removed? And you just can't see how God is going to break through?

Help is arriving in Haiti. Armies, doctors, nurses and relief workers from around the world are helping. Rescue is taking place. People's lives have been saved, and in time, the destruction will be removed.

Rescue is available for our loved ones, too.  Prayer is the place to begin as we hope that in the middle of their own destruction, they will see their need for rescue. When that realization becomes clear, like the tiny baby in Haiti, our loved ones will cry out for help. We know our God will be there to hear and rescue. He may use others to help them. He may call them to push away some of the debris. But more than anything, we know He wants them free.

Dear Lord, some days I grow weary of praying for my loved one. I am so glad that You don't. Please open their eyes to see the destruction they are in and give them the desire to break free.  In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Divine Prayers for Despairing Parents: What to Pray When You Don't Know What to Say by Susanne Scheppmann

Confessions of an Adulterous Woman: Lies that Got Me There, Truths that Brought Me Back by Lyndell Holtz

Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers

Visit Lynn's blog

Read one praying mother's story The Night I Lost All Hope

Application Steps: 

Is your loved one a child? A husband? A friend? Find another godly woman who will partner with you to pray daily for this person; preferably one who has had victory in her life with a loved one in this area. 

Pray for divine appointments in this person's life and others who will share compassion, love and Jesus' heart with them.

Get a notebook or journal. Write your loved one's name on the front. Begin to journal prayers, verses, etc., specifically related to your loved one. Fill in their name and use the word "you" i.e. "Today I prayed Ephesians 1:18-19 for you. It says...." Print prayers sent to you by others and put them in the journal. Believe that one day you will give this journal to your loved one as a testimony to what God has done.

Reflections:

Were you ever someone else's wayward loved one? If so, what did the Lord do to bring you to Himself?

Are you the wayward love one? If so, do not be afraid to call out from underneath your rubble. Those around you already see it.  They see you and more than anything they want you to be free and to help you to get there!

Power Verses:

Psalm 106:8, "Yet he saved them for his name's sake, to make his mighty power known." (NIV)

Zephaniah 3:17, "The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." (NIV)

© 2010 by Lynn Cowell. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

March 3, 2010

Retreat with Jesus

Amy Carroll

"Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men, for he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things."

Psalm 107:8-9 (NIV)
       
Devotion:

When a new neighbor moved in next door, Caroline rallied the troops in her neighborhood to prepare a warm greeting.  She and her friend planned a feast to take over to welcome the newcomer to their community.  Caroline called her new neighbor and was surprised when her hospitality was met with suspicion. 

"Why did you say that you wanted to bring me dinner?" the new neighbor questioned.  Caroline explained that it was a tradition in their area and that they'd like to deliver dinner to welcome her personally.  The neighbor responded, "I tell you what.  I'll give you a call when I'm hungry."  Click.

Caroline reflected on how many times we treat God the same way that her new neighbor treated her.  Each day God lays out a feast and invites every believer to come eat our fill.  I had to ask myself an important question: How many days do I rush by God's table and throw an "I'll come when I'm hungry!" back over my shoulder? 

I think I'm full, but God knows that I'm simply ignoring my hunger.  I need to sit down daily to eat and be filled from God's table.  Luke 1:53 says, "He has filled the hungry with good things but has sent the rich away empty" (NIV).

I long to have a heart to approach Him daily just as I am—poor and hungry.  He invites me to come to Him so that I can leave rich and full.  What a glorious exchange!  What a divine pleasure!

Daily time enjoying God is essential, but sometimes God gives us an invitation to a private, extended feast.  I am envious of one of my pastors.  He takes a week each year for a spiritual retreat to a monastery.  He goes where it's quiet and simple and spends a week with Jesus.  Maybe someday when my children are older and I'm caught up on laundry I'll be able to do that, but recently God led me to do something equally wonderful on a smaller scale.  I took a spiritual retreat during the school day in a room at my church.

As I walked up the stairs to the empty room, I felt nervous.  I had spent hours in prayer with others, but I had never spent this long alone with God.  Would I have enough to say to Him?  Would He speak to me in the silence?  Would the minutes drag by?  Would I walk out unchanged or disappointed?

At the end of the day, my questions were answered.  God met me there.  We filled our time together with prayer, Bible reading and worship.  God spoke words of direction to me in the silence.  I came in knowing that I was hungry, and He was faithful to fill me. 

Having mini-retreats with Jesus is something that I plan to do now at least twice a year.  In the midst of a full life, it's necessary to intentionally set extended time aside to seek His face and worship Him.  I'll still look forward to a week in an abbey, but in the meantime I'll bask in a school day retreat as I renew my relationship with God and feast on His goodness!
                                                                                                                                                                         
Dear Lord, help me know You are good. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Do You Know Jesus?

Visit Amy's blog

From My Heart to Your Throne: An Intimate Worship Collection (CD) by Melissa Melbourn
When a Woman Meets Jesus: Finding the Love Every Woman Longs For by Dorothy Valcarcel

Application Steps: 

Pray and ask God to give you a desire for extended time with Him.

Mark a day on your calendar for a retreat with Jesus.

Reflections:

Have I ignored my spiritual hunger and run by God's feast?

Power Verses:

Mark 6:31, "Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, 'Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.'" (NIV)

Matthew 5:6, "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they will be filled." (NIV)

© 2010 by Amy Carroll. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

March 4, 2010

Help Us Moms, Lord!

Lysa TerKeurst

"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." James 1:5 (NIV)
     
Devotion:

I wanted to tap the two girls sitting on the front row at our church service. And fuss at them in a not so gentle way I tell you. But they were five rows ahead of me and my arm couldn't quite reach.

Since I couldn't physically get their attention, I prepared my "look." You know the one that says a thousand corrective statements with just a cross expression and a raised eyebrow? Yes, that one.

The minute one of them stole a glance in my direction, they were going to know exactly how I felt about their wiggling and obvious lack of attention during the service. Oh, and I should mention, these two girls belonged to me. Well, at least one of them did. The other was my daughter's friend who sometimes goes to church with us.

I don't think anyone else really noticed them. They weren't being disruptive to other people. But they weren't acting the way I wanted them to. I wanted them sitting up straight, drinking in the message, and taking notes.

Suddenly, an annoying little thought started to tug at the corners of my mind. "You want your children to act perfectly because it makes you look good.  Let that go. They don't need to be sitting up straight furiously taking notes to hear God's message. This is a beautiful time for grace."

Ouch.

I don't much like the Holy Spirit speaking the kind of truth to me that hurts. I was in the mood to fuss at somebody. Two somebodies. Give grace? Now?  It wasn't what I wanted but it's exactly what I needed to do in that moment. Soon my daughter's friend peered back to look at me. Despite my feelings, I made the choice to smile, wink, and give her a little wave.

Then this wiggly, usually not very affectionate, middle schooler got out of her seat. She walked down the aisle, five rows back, and made her way to me. She threw her arms around me and gave me a hug that preached a thousand sermons right then and there.

Indeed, grace was exactly what was needed in that moment. The rest of the service she sat attentive beside me and even asked a few questions on the way home.

And that's what makes this parenting thing so hard. There are really no textbook answers. It's such a moment by moment balancing act between loving, shepherding, disciplining, extending grace, molding, modeling, loving some more and fussing a little along the way too.

The only way I can navigate this balancing act is to stay close to God.  Really close.  Rather than seeing God as far off, I have to rely on him as a desperate daughter who needs her Daddy.  Philippians 4:6 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

I like that verse but without quoting it in context, it's stripped of its power. The last 4 words of Philippians 4:5 are the power source that unlocks the peace of God that transcends all understanding.

Those four words are, "The Lord is near."

And because He's near, we don't have to be anxious- we can ask our Lord what to do, how to react, when to discipline and when to give grace.  James 1:5 reminds me, "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."  Only God can prepare me with the wisdom and discernment necessary for each and every parenting moment. So I must stay close to Him- ask Him- rely on Him- cry out to Him- and make Him the basis for my parenting. 

My goal should never be to raise kids that make me look good. (But, oh, how my flesh craves this!) My goal should be to ask God moment by moment for wisdom to know how to raise kids who proclaim God's goodness in their hearts. 

Blessings to you as you ever so delicately search for that balance between discipline and grace as well.
                                                                                                                                                                         
Dear Lord, I am asking for wisdom today to know how to best raise my kids.  Help me to know when to discipline and when to give grace.  Help me sense Your nearness so I don't feel so alone and overwhelmed with this task of being a mom. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Visit Lysa's blog for a chance to win a mom's encouragement package for you and a friend!

This devotion was taken from Lysa's new book: Am I Messing Up My Kids?  If you've ever wanted to stop yelling and start loving being a mom, get this book here today!

Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl by Lysa TerKeurst

Application Steps: 

Only God can prepare us with the wisdom and discernment necessary for each and every parenting moment. Pray for wisdom and revelation today as you lead your children. The more you ask for the spirit of wisdom and revelation, the more your actions will be redirected, moment by moment.  The more your actions are redirected, the more you will become like Jesus.  The more you become like Jesus, the more deeply you will come to understand His ways and know Him personally.

Read Psalm 103:8-13 and journal your thoughts.

Reflections: 

Who am I most likely to ask when I need parenting help?

What might be the benefit of turning to God first?

How can I become a wiser mom according to James 1:5?

Power Verses:

Proverbs 19:11, "A man's wisdom gives him patience..." (NIV)

Proverbs 24:3, "By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established." (NIV)

Ephesians 1:17, "I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better." (NIV)


© 2010 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.proverbs31.org

[Judy Harder]

March 5, 2010

Becoming a Woman of Dignity

Glynnis Whitwer

"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come."

Proverbs 31:25 (NIV)
       
Devotion:

How could I have done it?  How could I have gotten into an argument with my pre-teen daughter that reduced me to the level of: "Did not!"  "Did too!"   It was that bad.

I walked away knowing I needed a time out.  Wasn't I supposed to be the grown up?  Wasn't I supposed to be the mature, godly, Proverbs 31 woman?   At that moment, I was anything but.

Frustration at the interaction with my daughter rushed through my veins like adrenalin after a near accident.  I tried shaking it off, but the emotions stuck with me.

As I replayed the conversation in my mind, I thought of all the mature things I should have done and said.  I saw myself as I wished I'd been - calm, gentle and dignified.  And I wondered how I had drifted so far from the woman I wanted to be. 

Dignified.  The very word speaks to something in my spirit.  I imagine a self-controlled woman making deliberate choices about what she says and does based on her priorities.  I imagine a woman whose personality is not changed by circumstances, but exhibits grace under all kinds of challenges.

What is dignity anyway?  We find it mentioned in Proverbs 31:25 as something to be desired, "She is clothed with strength and dignity."  My dictionary defines it as "the quality or state of being worthy, honored or esteemed."  Based on that definition and the entire chapter of Proverbs 31, I believe a woman clothed in dignity is one who knows who she is in Christ, and chooses to act in ways consistent with her high calling as a child of God.

Sadly, I have at times allowed the actions and words of another to impact my choice to maintain my dignity.  In moments of frustration, I have set aside that dignity and allowed emotions to rule. 

In the frustration of having a schoolyard argument with my daughter, I forgot I was a woman chosen by God and given the strength to deal with daily challenges.  God invited me to clothe myself in His power, and I had rejected His offer of help. 

I had a lot of apologizing to do: first to my daughter, then to God.  I'm thankful both forgave me, and offered me an opportunity to try again to model dignity.  It made a difference.  The next time I felt emotions threaten to overtake me, I took a deep breath and thought, "I am a woman of dignity."   Then I prayed for God to step in and clothe me with His power to be that woman.
                                                                                                                                                                       
Dear Lord, thank You for choosing me to be a woman of dignity.  I know You see my potential, but the truth is I struggle daily to be that woman.  Please help me to sacrifice my selfish nature and replace it with Your gracious spirit.  I know I need Your help. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Becoming a woman of dignity starts with inviting Jesus to rule in your heart.  If you long for help with your emotions, and haven't invited Jesus into your heart, please visit

Do You Know Him?

Parenting Your Teen and Loving It: Being the Mom Your Kids Need by Susie Davis
Visit Glynnis's blog for more tips on keeping your cool under pressure

The Character of God by Brian T. Anderson and Glynnis Whitwer

Application Steps: 

List two or three behaviors that define a woman of dignity.  Commit to depend on God's grace to practice those behaviors in the coming week.

Reflections: 

It's easy to blame others for our lack of dignity.  How does blaming others hinder our personal growth?

What are some things you can do to prepare yourself to act with dignity in the face of a challenge?

Power Verses:

Titus 2:11-12, "God's saving grace has appeared to all people. It teaches us to say no to godless ways and sinful longings. We must control ourselves. We must do what is right. We must lead godly lives in today's world." (NIRV)

Colossians 3:12, "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience." (NIV)

© 2010 by Glynnis Whitwer. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.proverbs31.org

 

[Judy Harder]

 March 8, 2010

Jobless - Hopeful

Holly Good, Assistant to Lysa TerKeurst, She Speaks! Graduate

"... humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you."

James 1:21b (NIV)
         
Devotion:

My husband doesn't have a job. As the result of a merger he lost his job after having been with his organization for 21 years.  In the world of banking we were quite used to mergers and the threat of losing his job throughout our entire marriage. But last summer the cyclical threat came to fruition. His job was eliminated and he came home.

Life has certainly taken an interesting twist. I now wake up before he does. I leave the house for work and he stays home. He has cooked most of our meals, has helped our daughter apply to colleges, taken on a more active role in our middle school son's schoolwork and sports, and fixed a water problem in our back yard. And just now as I write this, I received a text from him at the grocery store, 'Do you want cinnamon flavored dental floss or regular?' Yes, he now does a majority of the grocery shopping as well.

We have had our struggles too. The what-ifs rear their ugly head and make an unwanted appearance in our minds from time to time. In addition to fleeting thoughts of fear and doubt, we have had our share of unwanted financial burdens as well. Our air conditioner broke; we had two pipe leaks in our home, a gas leak, our garage door broke, dreaded car repairs, and unexpected vet bills.

But we wait. And we hope. And we wait and hope some more.

Just this morning I read the book of James and was completely encouraged by the message God reveals through James' words.  I came away with renewed insight in two areas of my life: drawing near to God and humbling myself before Him.

As we wait and we hope, God is also waiting. Waiting for me to come near to Him for strength, hope and peace. True fulfillment in these three areas can only be realized and received from the Giver of life. The One who holds the world in the palm of His hand. The One who spoke us into existence. As I come near to Him, He will come near to me. Not always on my timetable or in the way I would predict or prescribe, but in His perfectly sculpted plan.

And humbling myself before Him is not robotically proclaiming, "I guess You are right God and I perhaps I am wrong." It means to come to a place where I can honestly admit that humbling myself before Him means that I recognize my worth comes from Him and Him alone. My very worth. Everything in and of me. I must submit and realize that I don't know the path without His guidance, power and favor.

It's so easy to run ahead and plan our attempts to work things for our good. Through the past seven months we have had to learn to wait, hope and trust beyond our comprehension. Beyond our plan. Beyond our wishes.

We've had to pause, wait and focus on the good that He is doing each day.

We've had to resist and flee the doubts and fears that creep in at a moments notice.

We've had to learn and relearn that as we humbly draw near to Him, we must trust, and leave the rest to Him.

And just in case you are curious, I asked for the cinnamon flavored dental floss.
                                                                                                                                                                         
Dear Lord, I admit that I need You today. Help me focus on what is true. Keep my mind from doubting Your plan. I know full well that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Change me and then use me Lord. Thank You for entrusting me with all that I have. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Please visit Lysa's blog for more insight and a chance to win a year's subscription to our P31 Woman Magazine for the best kind of monthly encouragement.

She Speaks! Conference

Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl by Lysa TerKeurst

Application Steps: 

Read the book of James. Prayerfully search the depths of your heart and ask God for wisdom as you read. He will teach you many things about faith, perseverance, compassion, service, speech, submission, concern for others and sharing.

Reflections: 

In what areas did you find encouragement as you read James?

What have you learned about faith, trials and perseverance?

Power Verses:

James 4:8a, "Come near to God and he will come near to you." (NIV) 

James 4:10, "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." (NIV)

James 3:17, "But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere." (NIV)

  © 2010 by Holly Good.  All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.proverbs31.org