Encouragement for Today

[Judy Harder]

 November 11, 2013

Choosing a Centerpiece
Tracie Miles


"He's the centerpiece of everything we believe, faithful in everything God gave him to do." Hebrews 3:2 (MSG)

I thought my Thanksgiving decorations were securely packed away last year, but when I pulled out the decorative cornucopia something was different.

Apparently a few hungry mice had nibbled on the Styrofoam bread loaf and plastic apples, thinking they were a tasty treat.

I had planned on putting the cornucopia in the middle of my dining room table, like I always do. But lack of proper packing had taken its toll, and my centerpiece was now full of holes.

As I assessed how to repair the damage, I felt a holy nudge on my heart. It was a prompting me to consider if I was concerned about the right centerpiece for the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday.

The previous months had been full of busyness and challenges. My heart had been burdened at times. I'd fallen into a pattern of focusing on my problems and to-do list instead of taking time to give thanks to God for His goodness in my life.

I intended to make Jesus the center of my attention, but didn't keep that commitment. My distracted focus reminds me of the Christians to whom the author of the book of Hebrews wrote.

These believers were in danger of losing their focus on Christ as their deliverer. People had begun putting their trust in prophets, angels, and even Moses. So in Hebrews 3, the people are reminded that Jesus is the only one worthy of trust and is where our faith should be centered.

The writer of Hebrews wanted Christians to stop putting themselves, other people, or material items, at the center of their attention, and instead draw their gaze back to Jesus.

Just like the people of that time, we can quickly get distracted, become busy, and inadvertently make our obligations and celebrations the focus of our attention. We gradually become self-centered instead of Jesus-centered.

Hypothetically, we may put Him in a box in the attic of our heart, only pulling Him out when the time is "right." This eventually leads to a life off-kilter and a heart full of holes, as challenges and pressures nibble away at our joy and peace.

It's one thing to believe in Jesus. It's another to make Him the center of our lives. When we make that important choice and remember to focus on Him and be thankful in all things, our hearts and lives stay in balance.

This Thanksgiving (and every day), let's praise God and commit to making Him our focal point. When we choose to make Jesus the emphasis of our holidays and our lives, we are blessed with the most beautiful centerpiece of all.

Lord, I never intended to put You on a shelf and allow life's distractions to alter my attention on You. Give me the spiritual desire to stay intently focused on You during this holiday and into the new year. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Stressed-Less Living: Finding God's Peace In Your Chaotic World by Tracie Miles is a wonderful resource about peace and eliminating chronic stress. Order before December 20th to receive a signed copy!

Avoid seasonal stress and make Christ the center of your holiday this year with practical tips from Tracie. Sign up for her "Managing Holiday Stress" Conference Call series byclicking here. And don't miss out on the LIVE Facebook holiday party. Join the fun by clicking here!

NIV Real-Life Devotional Bible for Women is the perfect tool to re-focus on Christ.

Reflect and Respond:
Consider what areas of your life need to be more Jesus-centered and less self-centered.

How can you make sure your attention stays on Jesus and not on life's distractions?

Power Verses:
Colossians 3:15, "And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful." (NLT)

Psalm 117:1-2, "Praise the LORD, all you nations. Praise him, all you people of the earth. For he loves us with unfailing love; the LORD's faithfulness endures forever. Praise the LORD!" (NLT)

© 2013 by Tracie Miles. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

November 12, 2013

Lonely
Amy Carroll


"Suppose someone falls down. Then his friend can help him up. But suppose the man who falls down doesn't have anyone to help him up. Then feel sorry for him!" Ecclesiastes 4:10 (NIRV)

Lonely. It's not a word I thought I'd ever use to describe myself, but that's how I felt.

For many years after a hard move I felt alone.

Close friends had always been a part of my life, and the absence of intimate friendships left me feeling sore-hearted. I longed to have someone to meet for coffee or help me expend some of my many daily words on the phone. It would have been wonderful to have a woman who would both listen and share.

Over time, I made new friends and re-established older friendships, and most days I feel connected and content. But I still remember what it felt like to be lonely. Recently, I read a study published by the American Sociological Review that cited statistics that showed half of Americans only have two close friends. And one out of four Americans say they don't have any close friends.

Not a single one. That's a lot of lonely hearts.

Why should we care? Scripture tells us in Ecclesiastes 4:10 that our friends are our helpers. When times get tough, they can help us navigate through them. "Suppose someone falls down. Then his friend can help him up. But suppose the man who falls down doesn't have anyone to help him up. Then feel sorry for him!" (NIRV)

So how can we be part of the solution, to help guarantee no one falls down without having a friend to pick them up?

If you're lonely ...
During my lonely days I told myself this over and over: When you don't have a friend, BE the friend to others that you would like to have.

"Amy," I'd say ...

• "Would you love a friend who takes time to show that she cares by picking up the phone and asking about your day? Then pick up the phone and ask about someone's day."

• "Would you love a friend who keeps confidences and is trustworthy? Then be trustworthy."

• "Would you love a friend who asks you to go the movies or for a walk? Then ask someone to go along when you do these things."

It's easier to stay isolated sometimes than to reach out, especially if you've been hurt or disappointed many times. I know too well. But I want to encourage you to reach out, show love and care about others.

God taught me so many things during my loneliness. I learned to be more dependent on Him. I learned to appreciate the friendship of my family more. I took a hard look at some things that weren't so wonderful about myself and worked to change them.

During lonely times of life, be intentional about connecting to God and others. There's so much to be learned in these times.

If you're not lonely ...
Think about your neighborhood, church, or an organization you are part of. If there are 40 women there, 10 of them feel like they don't have even one friend. Could God be calling you to be that friend?

Look for ways to open your circle of friends to new people. Watch for that woman at church sitting by herself, the co-worker who eats lunch alone, or the neighbor who never seems to be invited.

Reach out today to be part of one less life feeling lonely.

Dear Lord, You are the friend who is closer than a brother or sister. In this time of loneliness and seeming friendlessness, show me how precious friendship with You can be. Please teach me everything I need to learn in this phase of life. Would You also prepare a friend for me and prepare me to be a trusted, valued friend? In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Do You Know Him?

Visit Amy Carroll's blog for more encouragement!

Setting our hearts and minds on Christ helps take the loneliness away. Join the Proverbs 31 Ministries' team of writers in doing this through Encouragement for Today: Devotions for Everyday Living.

Reflect and Respond:
If you are lonely, take a step to be around people with whom you have things in common. Sign up for a class, join a book club, or attend a women's small group at your church.

What is God teaching you about friendship with Him through loneliness?

Power Verse:
Proverbs 17:17, "A friend loves at all times. He is there to help when trouble comes." (NIRV)

© 2013 by Amy Carroll. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

November 13, 2013

Faith in Action
Suzie Eller


"In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead." James 2:17 (NIV)

When I was 31 years old I received a diagnosis of breast cancer and affected lymph nodes.

Three months later I stood in front of a mirror. One breast misshapen from surgery. Twenty extra pounds after a second surgery and early menopause. Skin translucent from chemotherapy meds flowing through my veins.

I didn't recognize myself. I didn't recognize this new season. Life was uncertain at best, and scary on most days.

I wanted to be strong for my three babies.

I wanted to be strong for my husband, who was in protective mode, but also vulnerable as his young wife battled cancer.

I wanted to be strong for my mom, who snapped pictures when I wasn't looking, to capture memories of the daughter she loved, but feared she'd lose.

Where was I to find strength?

In the midst of what often felt like rough seas, my faith in Christ became my anchor. Additionally, God provided people who helped carry my burden.

Their strength became mine in a hundred small and large ways. How? By putting their faith into action as James 2:17 tells us to do: "In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead." (NIV)

Throughout the hard days of my treatment and recovery, I saw this verse lived out over and over.

A neighbor and his wife mowed our yard every week while I sat through chemo. Many brought groceries. Others cleaned our house. Put gas in our car. Cooked meals.

This faith in action eased the burden of physical and financial needs I felt I had to carry alone.

Friends sat in the waiting room with Richard while I was in surgery. They took our children out to eat and brought them treats.

This faith in action lifted the weight of worry over my beautiful children and husband.

One friend noted my need for humor in the midst of so much bad news; her attempts at being funny were just the right prescription. Another brought balloons to chemotherapy. I sat with a needle in my vein, bright balloons attached to my chair, and a smile on my face.

This faith in action bore my weight of sadness as I laughed out loud.

There are days I pinch myself; it's hard to believe 23 years have passed since then. My "babies" grew up and have given me grandchildren. Richard and I are growing older together.

Cancer is a word in my past, but faith in action is woven in my present.

I'll never forget how small acts, piled upon one another, equaled big relief for a family in crisis.

Sometimes we might think that faith in action is doing big things, and certainly it is; but small actions matter too.

James 2:17 doesn't diminish the beauty of faith, but rather tells us to put action with it. Action moves your faith from being one of words to life-changing impact on others.

Right now in your church, across the street, or somewhere in your community there is someone in crisis. Perhaps there's a friend or family member who is sick, grieving, confused or afraid, and you aren't sure what to say, or what to do.

Take a look at their needs and your means to meet them. Determine what you are able to do, then put your faith into action. Serve up a hearty dose of food, love, laughter, babysitting, or comfort!

Dear Lord, thank You for showing me someone who needs You. May my faith in action be a blessing today. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Do You Know Him?

Would you like to bring Suzie Eller to your church? Click here to find out more about considering Suzie as your next retreat / key note speaker.

Visit Suzie Eller's blog to celebrate 23 years of breast cancer survival with a giveaway!

The Unburdened Heart by Suzanne Eller.

Reflect and Respond:
Sometimes when a friend or family member is battling cancer, you might not know what to say. Ask about what mattered to them the day before they were diagnosed with cancer. Family, faith, interests, etc.

Who do you know in need, and what is one act of kindness that would relieve their burden? Do that today.

Power Verses:
Romans 12:13, "When God's people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality." (NLT)

© 2013 by Suzie Eller. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

 November 14, 2013

When You Don't Know What to Say
Lysa TerKeurst


"The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him." Nahum 1:7 (NIV 1984)

Recently a moving truck pulled up to my friend's house. Sometimes moving signifies something exciting and new. Sometimes it doesn't.

This move signified an end. A few hours into the process of emptying her home, the movers carried out her wedding portrait and asked, "Are you taking the photographs separately?"

"Yes," she said, the irony not escaping her. Separately. That was how she'd be living now. Separate from their neighborhood. Separate from her husband. Separate from the way she thought life would be.

She took the wedding portrait and through her tears she called me and said, "I don't know what to do with this portrait. What do you do with things that have no place anymore? We built a life together and now there's no more together."

I knew better than to throw out something just to fill the uncomfortable silence. Trite sayings weren't going to curl up in bed with her and hold her unglued heart.

Maybe you've been there. You were the one sitting in the midst of confusion or the one trying desperately to know what to say. In these difficult moments, we have to place our feet on the only solid ground there is—God's truth.

His truth won't shift with feelings.

His truth won't drown in a sea of tears.

His truth won't leave you even when your gut honest cries don't sound so Christian.

I finally said, "I don't have answers, but I do have prayers. And I'm going to write out conversations I have with God so you'll know He's not being silent right now. He sees you. He hears you. And through His truth He will comfort you."

I pulled out my Bible and poured out the hurt and sadness. "God, please show me the right truths. Use my hand to write out some comfort from Your Word for my friend."

Me: Lord, it's hard to watch my friend hurt so much. She begged You to help save her marriage and honestly we're confused why it still fell apart.

The Lord: Does Job 17:11 express the way you're feeling? "My days have passed, my plans are shattered, and so are the desires of my heart." (NIV 1984)

Me: Lord, don't You see her tears? If seeing her sadness breaks my heart, it must break Yours too.

The Lord: Recall the beauty of trusting the only One who can see what is and what is to come. Nahum 1:7... "The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him." (NIV 1984)

Me: I do trust You. But for everything to end like this is so hard. It just seems pointless.

The Lord: Nothing I allow is pointless. Even in the midst of hurt I will work good. Proverbs 19:20-21... "Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails." (NIV 1984)

Me: Why does she have to go through this?

The Lord: You don't have to have answers. You just need to trust. Isaiah 55:9b... "My ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." (NIV 1984)

Me: What about the desires of her heart Lord?

The Lord: I am the only one who knows the full scope of those desires. Just encourage her to trust Me and make wise choices. Psalm 37:3-4... "Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." (NIV 1984)

I sent this written out conversation with God to my friend. My note didn't fix her hurt or answer her questions. It didn't give her a place to put those things that seemed to have no place right now. But it did get her to open up God's Word and start having conversations with Him for herself. And as she moves on, this is a good first step to take.

Dear Lord, I lift my hurting friend to You. For You are the only One who can ultimately lift her up. Through all the ups and downs in life, may she trust You in a very personal way. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
We all react differently to life's circumstances. Unglued, by Lysa TerKeurst, shares wisdom in responding with truth and grace for the highs and lows. Click here to order your copy.

The accompanying Unglued Bible Study takes you further into God's heart. To order your copy, click here.

Reflect and Respond:
What is a disappointment you've walked through? Write the verses above on index cards to carry with you and write the words "I believe" after each one.

Power Verses:
Psalm 37:3-4, "Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." (NIV 1984)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

 November 15, 2013

Giving Away Pieces of Ourselves
Lisa Wingate


"My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret." Psalm 139:15a (ESV)

It's a mystery the way God sends lessons ... sometimes softly, sometimes suddenly and unexpectedly. I experienced one of these lessons while leading a youth weekend at church recently.

At an evening session, I found a middle-school girl alone in the sanctuary foyer. I sat down and asked her why she wasn't inside.

Her answer had attitude, "Oh, it's all just fake. This whole weekend is about how to be real, how not to be 'posers,' and everybody's all friendly. But when we get back to school, those girls won't even talk to me. That's why I quit coming here."

Her purse contents were spilled on the seat between us, a God-given thing. I reached for her cell phone and asked, "If I picked up your phone and walked off with it, what would you do?"

She looked at me like I was daft. "I'd make you give it back. My life is in that phone!"

Next, I took her tube of lip gloss and asked how much it cost. It was $1.50.

"What would you do if one of those girls you're worried about walked by and took this lip gloss?"

She quickly informed me that she would "Jump 'em."

"Why would you bother getting in a fight over a $1.50 lip gloss?"

Her answer was both obvious and profound, "Because it's mine. It's not theirs."

I looked at her, this little girl-becoming-a-woman. "You're right," I told her. "This lip gloss does not belong to them. It belongs to you. And so does your faith in God. And you have to defend that with at least as much determination as you would this $1.50 lip gloss. Or better yet, your cell phone. You cannot go through life letting other people walk off with what belongs to you and God."

As soon as those words left my mouth, I knew this wasn't a lesson just for this young woman. I too needed to hear my words. In a world where people sometimes disappoint us, it's easy to give away pieces of our faith and of ourselves. We give away pieces to people who don't even ask for them. It can be a natural reaction in a society focused on outward perfection. We do it each time we look at others and feel inferior, not as pretty, not as thin, not as ... whatever.

It's so simple, yet so difficult to grasp the truth found in Psalm 139 that tells us God created us and knew us from the very beginning. The Bible says, "My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret" (vs. 15 ESV). We were only visible to Him as He intricately knit all the parts of our bodies together.

Only a master artist has this ability. Much like someone who weaves together delicate fibers in a tapestry, God took the care to fashion us beautifully. Not only are we perfectly made, but we belong.

God loves the child He created. I like to think of it this way: God Loves Our Secret Selves (G.L.O.S.S.). He has poured beauty into us, into the very parts we often feel are less-than, compared to others.

I've been working on accepting this truth myself since then ... retaining and practicing this lesson.

I am loved. I am okay. I am treasured.

I am His.

Father, I pray I will hold on to the truth that You are a wonderful Creator and made no mistakes when You formed me. Help me value Your thoughts about me more than what others say about me. Amen.

Related Resources:
Lisa Wingate's newest book chronicles a woman's discovery of eighty-one carefully kept prayer boxes in an old house on Hatteras Island. Her journey through the boxes is a pilgrimage from brokenness to wholeness as well as a lesson in intentional prayer. Learn more about The Prayer Box by clicking here.

Learn more about prayer boxes by clicking here.

Reflect and Respond:
Have you given away pieces of yourself or your confidence in God to people you wouldn't allow to walk off with your lip gloss? Why?

Take time to memorize a few Bible verses about God's ability to create marvelous and beautiful things, and how you belong to Him.

Power Verse:
Psalm 139:14b, "Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." (ESV)

1 John 4:4b"... for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world." (RSV)

[Judy Harder]

 November 18, 2013

The Sacrifice of Thanks-sharing
Glynnis Whitwer


"Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name. And do not neglect doing good and sharing, for with such sacrifices God is pleased." Hebrews 13:15-16 (NASB)

Enough. That's what I have. Really, more than enough.

More than enough clothes in my closet. Food in my fridge. Shoes spread on the floor. Cans in the cupboard.

My children have books, warm jackets, tennis shoes, pencils, and opportunities for more. I have clean sheets, soft pillows, a kitchen table, and indoor plumbing.

My husband and I have never taken our provisions for granted. Every day we are thankful for the blessings of our home and family. Yet eight years ago we were increasingly aware of what Luke 12:48b tells us, "When someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required." (NLT) We felt an obligation to do something more with our blessings.

So in 2005 our family of five put a plan in place to share what we had. We had enough home, enough time, and enough love. Our gratitude to God for His blessings couldn't be kept to ourselves any more. We started with some rearranging. Two of our three sons moved furniture around so they could share a room, Then we bought two little white beds, pink curtains, and some dolls. I bought matching calico comforters and guessed at sizes of dresses.

After months of planning to share what we had, two little orphaned sisters stepped off a plane gripping the hands of their new daddy and walked into our hearts and homes.

They wore "African suits" bought from the place of their birth, brightly colored dresses that hung on tiny bodies. So proud they were to own their first new pieces of clothing, wanting to greet their new family in their best. As we wrapped our arms around these little girls, our family of five became seven.

As weeks turned into months, and typical family issues mingled with trauma from our daughters' pasts, we learned God's call to share isn't always easy. Oh, at first it was great, before the first blush of excitement wore off. But the magnitude of sharing our lives with two wounded little girls was harder than we ever imagined.

When worry about the future threatened to overwhelm me, God quietly reminded me that He didn't ask me to have the answers. That's His job. My job is just to share what He has given me–my love, my home, my life–with two not-so-little girls now who call me Mama. With a heart of thankfulness, and an open hand of generosity. That's all He's asking me. That's what blesses Him.

God's Word confirms what pleases Him. Hebrews 13:15-16 teaches us that we must link thanksgiving with sharing. But it also says it will be a sacrifice: "Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name. And do not neglect doing good and sharing, for with such sacrifices God is pleased." (NASB)

As we walk together as a family, we continue to learn that showing thanks to God involves sharing, and sharing involves sacrifice. God still calls us to share out of our abundance, and it still involves sacrifice. But when we share our lives, our homes, our money, our hearts, our skills, and our time as an outpouring of thanksgiving, God is pleased.

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your generosity with me. I don't deserve Your favor, and my heart overflows with thanksgiving. Help me to show my gratitude through words and actions that are pleasing in Your sight. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Visit Glynnis Whitwer's blog for an update on how God continues to call their family to share from a place of thanksgiving.

Do you long to share more of your life but aren't sure how to fit others in? Read how Glynnis manages it with her book I Used to Be So Organized.

For encouragement in your own daily struggles, our Encouragement for Today Devotional can meet you where you are.

Reflect and Respond:
At this season of Thanksgiving, what can you share with someone else?

Do you struggle with sharing what you have? Consider if God is calling you to a deeper trust in Him as your provider.

Power Verse:
1 Timothy 6:18, "Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share." (NIV)

© 2013 by Glynnis Whitwer. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

 November 19, 2013

Slippery Friendships
Samantha Evilsizer


"The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" Jeremiah 17:9 (NIV)

The white snow clouds shadowed the faces peering down on me as I lay flat on the freezing ground. Squinting up at the group, my thoughts whirled: How did this happen? Are my bones broken? Did I take anyone down with me?

Four winters in the mountains, coupled with countless sightings of others falling down, had taught me to watch where I stepped. I had gingerly led my Freshman Orientation group across campus as we picked our way through snowy sidewalks. But the brick steps outside the English building got the better of me.

After carefully standing up, and gathering my book bag and pride, I spotted the culprit. A small patch of ice—that I thought was melted snow—winked up at me.

Losing our footing happens, even when using caution. Stepping lightly isn't always a sufficient safeguard when walking into a potentially slick situation, especially one that involves our heart. Jeremiah 17:9 warns, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" (NIV) My friend Mia learned this truth at her first job.

In her new position, Mia often collaborated with people in other departments. She enjoyed getting out of her office and breaking up the day-to-day routine. There was one thing she most looked forward to though: meetings with her co-worker, Paul.

Though their jobs were serious in nature, meetings with him were light-hearted. An hour of shuffling paperwork disappeared in laughter and conversation.

Weekly meetings soon seemed like an eternity apart. To fill in the gaps, Paul and Mia emailed each other funny anecdotes. They'd catch a few minutes on the phone to tell about a snippet in their day. Eventually Mia and Paul shared lunches, inside jokes, and personal stories. When in a crowd, they'd gravitate to each other and sit together at staff meetings.

I'd heard so much about Paul I wasn't surprised when Mia brought him up one morning over coffee.

"I think I have a problem," she said. "I have a crush on Paul."

Honestly, I wasn't surprised after all she'd told me about him—everything but one incredibly important fact: "He's married."

In that moment, we both saw how little conversations and small confidences shared led her to fall for Paul. She'd stopped looking carefully where she was stepping and convinced herself they were "just friends."

But Jeremiah 17:9 tells us our hearts are deceitful and sly. The word "deceitful" in the original Hebrew language is 'aqob, meaning slippery and insidious. In other words, our own hearts can cause us to lose our footing before we're even aware it's happening.

When we fail to keep our guard up, we're at risk to fall down. And after the realization that we've gone too far, we may find ourselves asking: How did this happen? Are any marriages broken? Did I take anyone down with me?

Looking back, if I had re-routed my tour around campus, I could have avoided the fall. And that's just what Mia did. She asked God for forgiveness and wisdom. Then she determined to change her pattern at work. Mia stopped spending time alone with Paul and limited their non-work interactions. It took time for her feelings for him to go away, and she admitted it was a bit awkward at first. But after a while they settled in to a professional relationship—nothing more, nothing less.

Sometimes we don't recognize slippery spots on our own. But God does and if we ask, He will reveal these to us. Let's pause before taking another step in our friendships to ask the Lord for guidance. We might just spare our heart and avoid a damaging fall!

Dear Lord, thank You for the gift of friendship ... Yours and others. I want to point others—and myself—to You by my actions, words, and deeds. Help me do this by testing my heart and removing anything that could put me at risk of slipping. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Staying in God's Word is a great way to safe guard our hearts. Pick up a copy of the NIV Real-Life Devotional Bible for Women.

Visit Samantha Evilsizer's blog for more on God-honoring friendships and enter to win a copy of Encouragement for Today: Devotionals for Everyday Life.

Reflect and Respond:
If you have a friendship with someone of the opposite sex, does their spouse—and your spouse if you're married—know about the depth of your friendship? If not, why?

Ask the Lord—and a trusted, Christian friend—if you are on a slippery slope. What safety measures can you put in place if you have to work with this person regularly?

Power Verses:
Proverbs 4:23, "Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life." (HCSB)

Romans 8:1 "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." (ESV)

© 2013 by Samantha Evilsizer. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

 November 20, 2013

Adjusting Our Holiday Focus
Tracie Miles


"But the Lord said to her, 'My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.'" Luke 10:41-42 (NLT)

As I stared at the hard wood floor covered in shattered ornaments and tangled lights, tears welled up in my eyes.

The frustration over my fallen Christmas tree had pushed me to the breaking point. This was not the first time my decorated tree had crashed to the floor that week. It was the fourth.

After a fun day of picking out a tree, my family brought it home and secured the tree in a stand. When the last ornament was hung, we turned on the sparkling lights and stepped back to gaze at our accomplishment.

We cherished that moment . . . and cherished it again after the second round of decorating. But when the tree fell a third time and the surviving ornaments were sparse, the task of decorating became a chore. So when I heard the tree crash in the middle of the night, for the fourth time, I loudly vowed to never have a Christmas tree again.

My Christmas joy had been replaced with frustration and a small dose of anger. I'd become consumed with winning the battle with this tree and decorating my house for upcoming guests. Before I knew it, my focus was no longer on what was really important.

In Luke 10:41-42, Jesus told Martha that she'd lost her focus on what matters most: spending time with the Lord. Martha was so bent on planning the perfect dinner party and completing her tasks, she was too distracted to take time to enjoy the company of Jesus.

Her pursuit of perfection left her frustrated with her sister Mary's lack of help to make things "just so."

When Martha voiced her irritation to Jesus, He gently reminded her that she was worried about aspects that didn't matter. "But the Lord said to her, 'My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about'" (vs. 41). Jesus wasn't bothered with how fancy dinner was, or how clean her kitchen was, or if she had a perfectly decorated home. What really mattered to Jesus was Martha seeking Him.

This season—when our focus should be gratitude and on the birth of Jesus—we can get easily distracted by other details. Gifts to buy and how much they will cost. Social outings and what to wear. Decorating our homes (inside and outdoors). Cooking and cleaning to prepare for guests or parties.

It's easy to get swept up in many things and forget to stay connected with, and focused on, the one thing that really matters.

Just as busyness, cooking, and cleaning pulled Martha's focus away from Jesus, the same can happen to us in the fast pace of the holidays. Whether basting the perfect turkey or re-decorating an unstable Christmas tree, if we allow it, there is plenty to distract us and lure us away from the one thing that matters most.

Might we make a commitment to adjust our focus this holiday season? Let's slow down, pare down, and sit down with the Lord each day as we set our thoughts on being thankful. And remind our hearts to be blessed by the birth of our Savior, instead of being stressed over the season.

Dear Lord, I tend to get stressed during the holidays. Help me stay focused on You, and not get distracted or frustrated this season. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Stressed-Less Living: Finding God's Peace In Your Chaotic World by Tracie Miles is a wonderful resource about peace and eliminating chronic stress. Order before December 20th to receive a signed copy!

Avoid seasonal stress and make Christ the center of your holiday this year with practical tips from Tracie. Sign up for her "Managing Holiday Stress" Conference Call series byclicking here. And don't miss out on the LIVE Facebook holiday party. Join the fun by clicking here!

Decorate your home with a set of the Adorenaments gold and silver ornaments. Each set includes seven different names of Jesus (such as Emmanuel), and a beautiful devotional booklet to read as a family about the importance of each name. Click here for more information.

Reflect and Respond:
Have you allowed a particular frustration or disappointment to pull your focus away from Jesus?

What holiday plans or activities might you need to adjust to stay focused on Jesus, and not seasonal busyness?

Power Verse:
Colossians 3:2, "Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth." (NLT)

© 2013 by Tracie Miles. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

 November 21, 2013

The Treasure of Thrown-Away Food
Lysa TerKeurst


"But thanks be to God! He gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 15:57 (NIV)

My son Jackson wrote a paper about the corruption and greed that caused the civil war in his native land. But Jackson wasn't just explaining a historical event – he lived in the midst of the horrific conditions of this war. You see, for the first 13 years of his life, Jackson lived in a forgotten orphanage in the third world country of Liberia, Africa.

During one part of the paper, he described what it felt like to be naked digging through the trash looking for the treasure of thrown-away food.

The treasure of thrown-away food.

I can hardly type those words without crying. This is my son.

And yet, despite the horrific conditions of his childhood, there was an unexplainable thread of peace woven through his recollection of the story. A powerful peace centered in the awareness of God's presence.

The truly thankful person is a truly peaceful person. They have made a habit no matter what, to notice, pause, and choose.

Noticing something for which to be thankful no matter their circumstance.

Pausing to acknowledge this something as a reminder of God's presence.

Choosing to focus on God's presence until His powerful peace is unleashed.

Will we be a noticer? A pauser? A chooser? A person of thanksgiving no matter what circumstance we're facing?

I find this truth about the power of thanksgiving over and over in Scripture. What was the prayer Daniel prayed right before being thrown in the lion's den and witnessing God miraculously shutting the lion's mouths? Thanksgiving.

After three days in the belly of a fish, what was the cry of Jonah's heart right before he was finally delivered onto dry land? Thanksgiving.

How are we instructed to pray in Philippians 4:6 when we feel anxious? With thanksgiving.

And what is the outcome of each of these situations where thanksgiving is proclaimed? Peace.

Powerful, unexplainable, uncontainable peace.

"And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:7 NIV).

One of Webster's official definitions of thanksgiving is: "a public acknowledgment or celebration of divine goodness."

I wonder how we might celebrate God's divine goodness today.

I wonder what might happen if we decide in the midst of our circumstances today to notice, pause, and choose something for which we can truly be thankful.

Dear Lord, will You help me notice things for which I can be thankful in each circumstance I face today? Will You help me remember to pause and acknowledge this as evidence of Your presence? And will You help me remember to choose to focus on Your presence until Your powerful peace rushes into my heart and helps me see everything more clearly? Thank You for the reality that being thankful changes everything. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Lysa TerKeurst's adoption story began when she heard a group of refugee boys singing at a local church. She had no idea those songs would change everything! To watch a video of Lysa's sons singing with fellow members of the Liberian Boys Choir, click here.

If this devotion resonated with you, find more of God's peace and perspective in Proverbs 31 Ministries' new devotional book, Encouragement for Today. Filled with 100 devotions, this book is a perfect resource for cultivating a thankful heart during this holiday season. Click here to purchase your copy.

Reflect and Respond:
Start a thankfulness journal where you daily list five things for which you are thankful. Do this for the next 30 days and see how much more peaceful your mindset about life becomes.

Think of someone who is really thankful. Despite the circumstances they face, are they more peaceful? How does this inspire you?

Power Verses:
1 Chronicles 16:34, "Oh, give thanks to the LORD, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever." (NKJ)

1 Chronicles 23:30, "They were also to stand every morning to thank and praise the LORD. They were to do the same in the evening." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

[Judy Harder]

 November 22, 2013

Am I a Mean Girl?
Dannah Gresh


"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." Philippians 2:3 (ESV)

Sitting in the hair salon, I asked the stylist if she could get me a refill of my make-up. The sweet woman helping me returned with bad news.

"We don't have the refills, but we have a new compact. Would you like that?" she asked, apologetically.

Knowing how busy my schedule was, I answered matter-of-factly, "I'll have to get it somewhere else." I was annoyed and it showed.

That's when I realized something: I have the potential to be a mean girl.

How I wish I could have exchanged my bad attitude in the salon with the humble one I witnessed just one hour later at the grocery store.

Standing in the checkout line, I watched as a white-haired lady began to put her groceries on the conveyor belt. She caught my attention because her sweater was funky and full of life.

She'd already put a few items on the counter when the cashier said, "I'm sorry, ma'am. I'm closing."

"Oh, sweetheart," that dear woman replied, as she placed her red cabbage back in her cart. "I bet you're just about to have a nice lunch. Or get off for the day. Oh, I hope it's that! Enjoy!" And off she went in her eccentric sweater and spunky spirit.

She changed the entire atmosphere with her kindness to the cashier that had shooed her away.

I want to be like that. But too often I'm not.

When I got home, I turned to my Bible—the one thing that could help me change. I flipped it open to read the mean girl story of Sarai and Hagar found in Genesis 16.

Sarai wasn't able to have children. Knowing this was important to her husband, Abram, Sarai told him to marry and have a child with her maid, Hagar. Sure enough, Hagar conceived.

The Bible says, "When [Hagar] knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress" (Genesis 16:4 NIV). The Hebrew word for despise means "to be of little account." In other words, Hagar thought Sarai was unimportant. It didn't take long for Sarai to pick up on her maid's haughty attitude, and Sarai began to disdain Hagar and treat her poorly.

Instead of caring about the hurt the other was feeling or talking through the burdens each woman was carrying, Sarai and Hagar allowed bitterness and envy to infiltrate their relationship. Their feud ultimately affected both their families, causing division.

Many of us have experienced discord in our family because of two mean girls. A small misunderstanding and lack of clear communication can turn a simple conversation into a lifetime argument. This may result in families not talking to each other, spending holidays apart, or not helping one another in times of need. When women allow their inner mean girl to come out, it can divide entire families.

The way we treat others impacts everyone, especially our children. If they see a mean girl in us, they very likely will copy our behavior. However, if they find us loving others, they hopefully will copy our example.

When we allow the mean girl in us to come out, it's usually because we see ourselves as more important than someone else. And that kind of vision is the opposite of God's instruction for us: to see others as more important than ourselves.

Today, let's put into practice Philippians 2:3, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves" (ESV). It might not be easy at first. But seeing others as more important than ourselves will help keep our inner mean girl at bay and hopefully maintain peace in our families.

Lord, I tend to see myself as if I'm in one of those mirrors that make images appear larger than they really are. Help me see the value in everyone I meet—from my own children to the cashier at the grocery store. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Talking to Your Daughter about Best Friends & Mean Girls by Dannah Gresh.

Visit Dannah's Secret Keeper Girl website for more articles on raising daughters.

Reflect and Respond:
What encounters did you have in the last 24 hours that may prove there is an inner mean girl in you?

Next time you feel your inner mean girl coming out, make an effort to be kind: ask the other person how they are, offer to help them with a task, or text them a quick note of encouragement.

Power Verse:
Ephesians 4:32, "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." (NIV)

© 2013 by Dannah Gresh. All rights reserved.