Girlfriends in God

[Judy Harder]

April 19, 2012
Accountability:  A Hedge of Protection
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Romans 12:5 "...and each member belongs to all the others."

Friend to Friend
A certain expert guide lived in the deserts of Arabia. He was known for his tracking skills and never lost his way. The secret of his success could be found in the fact that he carried with him a homing pigeon with a very fine cord attached to one of its legs. When he had doubts as to which path to take, he threw the bird into the air. The pigeon quickly strained at the cord to fly in the direction of home, leading the guide accurately to his goal. Because of this unique practice, he was known as "the dove man."

We always need connections to those who will point us in the right direction. We will take the wrong path or make a wrong turn and there will be times when we have no idea which way to go or how to get home. We must then turn to God and to those who hold us accountable.

Accountability is often seen as confining, a relationship straight jacket that limits freedom of expression and hinders those who "march to the beat of a different drummer." Actually, the opposite is true. Accountability frees us to grow and change and is an important part of every relationship.

When I married into the Southerland family, I didn't know that tent camping was part of the deal. I might have reconsidered (just kidding). I decided I could learn to camp and maybe even enjoy it!  My first trip to Lake Greason in the foothills of the Ozarks was quite an experience. It did not take me long to learn the daily routine. Each morning, Dan's mom would prepare a huge breakfast. The kids then did dishes while mom changed into her swim suit, donned her sun glasses, grabbed a towel and headed for the lake. On the shore, she grabbed an inner tube, positioned her towel in just the right spot over the tube, turned around and sat down. She would then float blissfully for hours.

There was a slight problem with this plan. Lake Greason had a current that carried mom down the lake, around the bend and into the path of ski boats. Several times a day, someone would have to swim after her and pull her back to the safety of the shore, where she would profusely thank them and go right back to floating. Finally, one of the kids came up with a great idea. We grabbed a ski rope, tied one end to mom's inner tube and the other end to a wooden stake driven securely into the ground. She could then float until the rope ran out and someone "reeled her in." What a perfect picture of accountability – giving someone who loves you the permission to "reel you in" when they see you headed in a dangerous direction. When we willingly make ourselves accountable to others, we are creating a hedge of protection that ultimately yields boundaries, parameters or behavioral lines that should not be crossed.

Honestly, most of us have experienced very little accountability in life because at the heart of being accountable to someone is the willingness to be submissive to them. We have abused the concept of submission. It was never intended to be demeaning and does not involve slavery in any form. Submission is protection and an intentional willingness to consider first the desires and wishes of another before our own.  God places others in our lives to see things that we cannot see, to encourage and build up, to correct, love and protect, but still, we tend to view accountability as a crutch and submission as a weakness. Submission is harnessed strength, a controlled strength that is born out of obedience to God's command. "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ" (Ephesians 5:21).

Jesus submitted Himself to the will of His father. He willingly laid down His desires and dreams, His plans and hopes in total submission. Out of that total surrender came the most powerful life ever lived. When we willingly submit ourselves to God and choose to make ourselves accountable to others, we will experience a freedom and power we have never known before.

Let's Pray
Father, I come to You today, submitting myself to You. Thank You for the protection, direction and power that comes from that submission. Forgive me when I have stood silent while someone I loved made dangerous decisions. Give me the courage to confront in love. Give me the wisdom to receive correction and to be accountable to others. Thank You for Your love that never condemns but always stands ready to keep me from making mistakes. And when I do fall, thank You for being there to pick me up and walk with me.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Read Proverbs 27:6 "Faithful are wounds of a friend."  What does this verse mean to you?  How does this verse relate to accountability?

Name two people in your life to whom you are accountable.
Are they willing to tell you the truth instead of what you want to hear?
Are they godly people who will constantly point you to Christ?

Who is accountable to you?
Are you willing to step between that person and the wrong choices?
Can you confront in love for the sole purpose of restoration?

More from the Girlfriends
God did not create us to live alone. We were created to need each other – for many reasons – one of the most important being accountability. It is much easier to make the wrong choices and to take the wrong turns when no one is watching. I often wonder how many marriages have failed, how many friendships have been destroyed, or how many lives have been wasted because there was no accountability. I praise God every day for a husband and friends who are willing to be a safety net in my life by holding me accountable. If you don't have an accountability partner, don't wait another minute. Ask God to send you a friend who loves you enough to protect you by holding you accountable.

Need help?Check out my Online Bible Study. We are learning how to tame the tongue.

Need a friend?Connect with Mary on Facebookor through email. She loves hearing what God is doing in your life!

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.


Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com
www.girlfriendsingod.com

[Judy Harder]

April 20, 2012
Something Beautiful
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
"...Jesus said to them, "Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me." (Matthew 26:10, NIV)

Friend to Friend
I am completely crazy about cool jewelry, so when the Lord prompted me to take off my favorite necklace and give it to the woman who had just admired it, I tried to pretend that I didn't hear Him.

"It's mine, God!" I reasoned. "It isn't replaceable! Why would ask me to do that?"

My self-plan didn't like the God-plan that was laid out before me. God was asking me to give up something that meant a lot to me so that another woman could be blessed. It seemed crazy. Unnecessary. But, in this instance, through the strength of Christ, I chose to obey even though I didn't want too. It hurt. It cost me big. I felt the loss.

God softened my childish heart, however, as the woman wept at the Lord's blessing. As I silently confessed my selfish thoughts, God poured a deep joy into my soul. He showed me that my sacrifice was an act of worship to Him. Blessings boomeranged right back to my heart as I humbly thanked Him for allowing me to participate in His moment with her. It was a beautiful thing.

There are just some times I'd rather give gifts that don't cost me too much. But that's probably something that only I wrestle with, right? (Wink! Wink!) It's hard to be open handed with things that we hold dear, isn't it? Some of us struggle with an unwillingness to give away material things or money. Others of us hold tight to our schedules, affections, positions, jobs or our availability. Still more of us hold tightly to our children, grandchildren, spouses, friends, parents or other people in our lives that we want to keep a tight reign on.

The Bible addresses this issue and shows us a beautiful picture of surrendered devotion in Mary of Bethany. The offering she poured out onto the feet of Jesus was worth a year's wages. She lavished her costly perfume, her attention, her affection, her time and her worship on Jesus because she loved Him. He was her Savior. Her Friend. Her Hope. The Healer who had miraculously brought life back to the stench of death that had fallen on her brother Lazarus.

"While Jesus was in Bethany in the home of a man known as Simon the Leper, a woman came to him with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, which she poured on his head as he was reclining at the table.

When the disciples saw this, they were indignant. "Why this waste?" they asked. "This perfume could have been sold at a high price and the money given to the poor."

Aware of this, Jesus said to them, "Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, but you will not always have me. When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. I tell you the truth, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her."(Matthew 26:6-13, NIV)

The Message paraphrase says it this way:She has just done something wonderfully significant for me. (Matthew 26:10)

When I read this story, I'm compelled to wonder: when God looks at my life, does He see a beautiful thing? Does He see me do anything that is wonderfully significant for Him?

What do you think He sees when he looks at your life?

Does He see a beautiful thing?

I co-wrote a song that was inspired by this Scripture passage and I'd love to share it with you as we conclude our devotion time. Allow the words of this song, Something Beautiful, to be the prayer on your heart as you listen.

When we open the hands of our lives to His presence, to His service and for His glory, rest assured Godwill see a beautiful thing. When we obey His promptings and listen to His voice that whispers to our soul, He will fill us to overflowing with joy, peace, satisfaction and His beauty.

Let's Pray
Dear God, You are worth far more praise than I could ever give. Please help me to rest in Your presence and trust in Your plan. Fill me with Your perspective until I joyfully lay down my will for Yours. Lord, when You look at my life, I want You to see beautiful. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Consider what you are holding back from God. Spend time in prayer giving it back to God.

Read through Psalm 96. Read through it a second time, but pause after each verse with a personal, prayerful response to God. Journal any verses that you want to remember.

More from the Girlfriends
Every beautiful act of worship begins with the heart. If you would like to learn more about how your brokenness can be transformed into a picture of God's beauty, order Gwen's book Broken Into Beautiful.This resource will help you experience the power of hope, healing and restoration!

Something Beautifulis featured on Gwen's Uncluttered CD. You can download the songs from iTunesor Amazon– or order her CDs on www.GwenSmith.net.

Please come to my Facebook page today and share your heart and your "Something Beautiful" story with me. www.facebook.com/GwenSmithMusic.

[Judy Harder]

April 23, 2012
Where Do You Go When You Hit Rock Bottom?
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"But David strengthened himself in the Lord his God,"(1 Samuel 30:6 NIV).

Friend to Friend
Sometimes life doesn't work out the way we thought it would. This was certainly the case for a teenage boy named David who was anointed the next King of Israel.

While King Saul was still on his throne, God chose David to be his successor. This didn't sit too well with the King and he made every attempt to kill David before the crown could be placed on his handsome head. The young David, who earlier had bravely charged the Philistine giant, Goliath, now ran for his life. The one place Saul didn't think David would hide was among the Philistines whom he had previously shamed. So that is exactly where David hid...the briar patch, so to speak.

By this time, David had a six hundred man army gathered round him. Each man brought his wife and children to live in the camp. The rag tag team of outcasts became David's kingdom for a time.

One day while David and his men were off fighting a battle, another group of people, the Amalakites, invaded their camp and took all their wives and children captive. When David and his men returned home, they found empty beds, smoldering fires, and the haunting absence of familiar voices.

The men wept until they had no more tears or energy for recourse. Rather than devise a rescue plan, they turned their anger on their leader and threatened to stone him. Hurting people often hurt people and they were looking for someone to blame.

Can you imagine how David must have felt? His previous employer was trying to kill him (he had worked in Saul's palace), his best friends had turned against him, and his wife and children had been taken captive or possibly killed. Where was he to turn? How could he encourage his men when he had nothing left to give?

There was only one place to turn...to God.

"But David strengthened himself in the Lord his God" (1 Samuel 30:6). Friend, sometimes to God is the only place we have to go. Isn't it a shame that we wait until God is our last resort rather than our first line of defense? Yes, God has called us to live in community with other believers, but sometimes I believe He wants us all to Himself.

Moses was alone with God when he talked to God in the burning bush. Hagar was alone with God when he spoke to her and gave her water in the desert. Elijah was alone with God when God revealed Himself in the still small voice. Hannah was alone with God when she poured out her heart in prayer for a child. Jesus often went away by himself to commune with His Father. Where do we go when we hit rock bottom? When we're feeling empty? When we've lost hope?

Go to God. Strengthen yourself in the Lord your God. It worked for David and He will work for you. David later wrote, "It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure," (Psalm 18:32 NIV).

Let's Pray
Heavenly Father, Please give me the strength I need to meet each challenge I will face today. Thank You that You promise never to leave me or forsake me. No matter how alone I may feel, or how many turn against me, I know that You are always there. You are always for me.
In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Look up the following verses and note what you learn about God being your strength.
Deuteronomy 31:6
1 Chronicles 16:11
Isaiah 41:10
Psalm 22:19
Joshua 1:9

Let's do life together. Log on to www.facebook.com/sharonjaynesand tell me which one of those verses is your favorite.

More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was adapted from Sharon's book, The Power of a Woman's Words. Some of the most important words we will ever say are the ones we say in prayer. If you would like to learn more about how to use God's incredible gift to you...words...then check out this book. You have the ability to speak life into those around you! You have the ability to change the course of someone's life.

[Judy Harder]

April 24, 2012
Storms are for our Good
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Psalm 46:1 (NRSV) "God is our refuge and strength, a tested help in times of trouble."

Friend to Friend
While vacationing in the mountains, a man watched as a lumberman occasionally jabbed his sharp hook into a log, separating it from the others floating down the mountain stream. The man asked the lumberman why he was separating some of the logs.

The worker replied, "These logs may all look alike to you but a few of them are very different. The ones I let pass are from trees that grew in the valley. They were always protected from the storms. Their grain is coarse. The ones I have hooked and set apart from the rest came from high up on the mountains. From the time they were small, they were beaten by strong winds. That toughens the trees and gives them a fine and beautiful grain. They are too good to use for plain lumber so we save them for our best work."

I don't like storms. Blue skies and bright sunshine are my personal preference. The same is true in life. I often think boredom is highly underrated and tend to long for a day without problems, a crisis or some kind of disaster. When a storm does hit, my first reaction is to look for a way of escape. I want to avoid pain and sidestep complicated situations if at all possible. However, looking back over my life, the reality is that my greatest growth and the deepest truths God has to offer have been accomplished through the fiercest storms.

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He feverishly prayed for God's rescue, but with every day that passed, his hope weakened. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood for protection from the elements, and to store his few possessions. One day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. Everything was lost. Stunned with grief and anger, the man cried, "God, how could you do this to me!" The next morning, he woke to the sound of a ship approaching the island. It had come to rescue him. "How did you know I was here?" the weary man asked. "We saw your smoke signal," they replied. Storms are for our good.                       

Let's Pray
Father, I want to thank You for the storms in my life because they make me turn to you. They keep me on my face before You. I am desperate for Your power and presence at work in my life. Anything that makes me cry out to You can be counted as a blessing. I love You, Lord, and trust You with every storm that comes my way.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Read 1 Peter 4:12-13 "Do not be surprised at the painful things you are now suffering. These things are testing your faith." (ICB) In your own words, describe the testing you are going through today in your life. How is it testing and strengthening your faith?

Read 2 Corinthians 6:6 (NLT) "We have proved ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, our sincere love, and the power of the Holy Spirit." This verse lists the qualities God wants to create in us through storms that come our way. Which ones are present in your life? Which ones is He trying to produce in you today? Are you willing to let Him do so?

More from the Girlfriends
Your trials are many and you have been battered by some brutal storms. I know.  But more importantly, God knows. In Him, you are a storm survivor.  And when you are face to face with a storm, you are standing on the edge of discovery. Don't tell God how big your storm is. Tell your storm how big your God is!

[Judy Harder]

April 25, 2012
To Speak or Not To Speak...that is the Question
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven...a time to be silent and a time to speak,"(Ecclesiastes 3:1,7).           

Friend to Friend
When Steven was about seven-years-old, we went snow skiing. For hours I instructed him in how to stand up, ski down, and get up once he fell. Steven fell down, and fell down, and fell down. He was not getting the hang of it at all. What's the problem, I wondered.  Then I found out.  It was me.

"Mom," Steven cried, "If you just quit telling me what to do, I think I could get it."

"Fine!" I said as I skied away in frustration. "Go ahead and do it your way!"

And you know what? He did. Thirty minutes later Steven was cruising down the slopes with ease. See I was the problem. My continual instruction was hindering Steven from working the maneuvers out on his own. The day started out being a skiing lesson for Steven, but ended up being a parenting lesson for me.

Sometimes the most powerful words are the ones we withhold. "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven...a time to be silent and a time to speak," (Ecclesiastes 3:1,7). A wise woman learns the difference.

In the Bible, Esther is a wonderful example of a very wise woman who knew that timing was crucial. After much prayer, fasting and deliberation, she went before the King to make a petition for her people. It was an important request as the entire Hebrew nation was at stake. Rather than grovel at the King's feet in dismay, she very calmly invited him to dinner. When the King attended the soirée the following evening, once again he invited Esther to make her request.  Once again, she invited him to dinner the following evening.

At the second dinner party, the King offered yet a third opportunity for Esther to make her request. Finally, Esther revealed the evil Haman's plot to annihilate the entire Hebrew nation, which included her life as well. It is an amazing story and I encourage you to read the book of Esther for yourself. But here's a lesson among the drama. Esther had a very important request for the King. And yet, it was all about timing. Sure, she could have made the request the first time she approached the King and he extended the golden scepter in approval. Yes, she could have made her request at the first dinner party when he offered her anything she desired, "up to half his kingdom." But there was something in Esther's spirit that caused her to wait. The time wasn't quite right.

Even though the Bible doesn't tell us directly, I believe that Esther was listening to God.  I believe the Holy Spirit was telling her to wait. Because she asked herself the question, to speak or not to speak, and then spoke when the time was right, the entire Hebrew nation was saved. That is the power of a woman's words offered at the right time. 

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven...a time to be silent and a time to speak," (Ecclesiastes 3:1,7).

Let's Pray
Lord, sometimes I talk too much. Help me know when to speak and when to keep silent. And Lord, give me the self-control and courage to do both.
In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Here is a fun verse to ponder. Job said, "I put my hand over my mouth." Give it a try. I bet your hand is a perfect fit!

Think of a time that you did not speak, and later, you were so glad you didn't.

Part of not speaking too quickly is learning how to listen. If you'd like a list of ways to become a better listener, visit my website and click on the Free Living Life Resources for a List of 30 Hints to Becoming a Good Listener.

More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was adapted from Sharon's book, The Power of a Woman's Words. This book also has an accompanying Bible Study Guide and an Interactive Teaching DVD that is perfect for women's Bible study groups. You can find it at www.sharonjaynes.com.  Click hereto watch the book trailer.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.


Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com
www.girlfriendsingod.com

[Judy Harder]

April 2012
Can we really trust God?
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Romans 8:28 (NIV) "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Friend to Friend
A daughter was telling her mother how everything was going wrong. "I am failing Algebra. My boyfriend just broke up with me, and my best friend is moving away," she wailed. Her mom listened patiently and then asked, "I made a cake for dinner. Would you like a snack?" The girl grinned and said, "Sure, Mom. I love your cake." The mom smiled and asked, "How about some cooking oil?" The daughter looked surprised at the offer and responded with a loud "Yuk!" The mom tried again, "How about a couple of raw eggs?" With a look of confusion, the daughter said, "Gross, Mom!" With a smile, the mother offered, "Would you like some flour or maybe a cup of baking soda?" The daughter responded, "Mom, all of those things are gross!" The mother cut a piece of cake and placed it on a plate with a fork. As she handed the delicious snack to her daughter, she explained, "Honey, all of those things seem bad when you think about eating them alone, but when they are put together in the right way, they make a delicious cake."

God often works the same way. We sometimes wonder why He allows us to go through such difficult times, but when God puts everything in the right order, they work out for our good. We just have to trust Him to do so. I will never forget the day I learned how God really can turn tragedy into triumph. I was sitting at my desk, working on an assignment from the counselor I had been seeing. For months, I had been wrestling with my past - slowly, methodically working through painful issues and buried memories that seemed to be feeding the clinical depression I was battling. As page after page filled with harsh realities, a memory slammed into my heart and mind.

The pain was overwhelming as a vile scene from my childhood slowly took shape. I could hardly breathe as I frantically tried to escape the certainty I had been molested. The perpetrator had been our family doctor and a trusted friend. He had even provided free medical treatment when we couldn't pay for it. I trusted him, counted on him. As a nurse, my mother worked beside this man every day and often babysat his children to earn extra money.

Anger unlike any I had ever known fueled violent thoughts of revenge and retaliation. I was angry with this man – and angry with God. How could He have let this happen? Where was the light in this dark place?

For months, I worked through painful memories and raging emotions until I saw the first glimmer of light. It was wrapped in chosen forgiveness. I began to see that had I never been wounded so badly, I would never have been able to forgive so freely – and in doing so, discover a depth of healing and freedom only the greatest pain can produce. Today, I can honestly thank God for all He has accomplished in me through the sin of that man.

There are no accidents with God, nor is He surprised by anything or anyone in the life of His child. God uses even the most horrendous circumstances for our good. Every circumstance comes to us for a purpose, bound by God's love and plan and faithfully delivered with His permission. While we cannot go back and change our past, we can change the way we respond to our past and determine how much power it has in our lives today.

Only God can take the broken pieces of your life and make something beautiful out of each one. He is waiting for you to let go of your pain and trust Him. And you really can. No one loves you like He does. You may not always understand or even like His process, but you can always trust His heart of love for you.

Let's Pray
Father, I choose to believe You are faithful and will do what You promise to do in Your Word. I believe that when I lay the pain and hurt of my past at Your feet, You can and will transform it all into something beautiful. I choose to believe You will turn the broken places of my life into living illustrations of Your sufficiency and healing power.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Read the following verses about the good God can bring out of the storms in life.

Isaiah 45:3 (NLT) "And I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness – secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name."

Hebrews 12:1 (NIV) "Let us lay aside every weight and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us."

Psalm 103:12 (NLT) "He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west."

What one new truth has God given you in each verse? Record those truths in your journal.

More from the Girlfriends
Need help learning how to study the Bible? Check out my Online Bible Study. We are learning how to tame the tongue.

[Judy Harder]

April 27, 2012
Healer of the Broken
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." Psalm 147:3

Friend to Friend
I love my girlfriends. I love doing life with friends who "get me." I love having tangles of conversations over hot coffee that are stranded together with light-hearted laughter, rich revelations, loads of love, treasures of time and gobs of grace.

Though sharing beautiful life-moments is always fun, some of the most powerful blessings of friendship for me have been found in broken places. In the trenches. Those places where our troubles and fears scream loudly and long to be quieted by the understanding heart of a friend. Times when we rise up to encourage one another with God's promises, share reminders of His truth, extend challenges to believe, offer prayers for problems and speak hope to a sister who's hurting.

A few years ago, after a long conversation with a girlfriend who was in a painfully broken place, I was burdened. Heavily. Her shared-pain had become my pain. I ached for her to experience the hope of Christ in and through her hurt. Though she knew the Lord, she felt like her prayers were falling on deaf divine ears. She needed me to listen, to cry with her and to take her right back to Jesus. As I prayed for my friend and considered her burdens, I was inspired to write a song of encouragement. I later co-wrote the song below with her in mind.

I'm not sure where this message of hope finds you. Sometimes we just need to be reminded that God cares and that He is compassionate. Sometimes we just need to be reminded that God sees us, knows us, hears us and loves us. That He is faithful, powerful and never wastes a hurt. Perhaps you need a word of encouragement today. Perhaps you know a friend who needs this word. The best thing we can do for our friends is to love them and point them to Jesus.

Allow the words of this song, Healer of the Broken, to be the prayer on your heart as you listen and read:

"Healer Of The Broken"
by Gwen Smith and Sue C. Smith

Oh wounded heart
My hurting friend
Desperate and afraid
You're not invisible
Someone knows the pain you're in
You can run to Him

The Healer of the broken
The friend to every sinner
Who knows the sorrow of each scar
Every time you call on
The Savior who is waiting
He will meet you where you are
And heal your broken heart

He knows your name
Each midnight fear
When you try to hide
Or fight for one more breath
Love will be your safe retreat
He will give you peace

In every valley
In every pain
Jesus is with you
Just call His name
Call His name

Let's Pray
Dear Lord, Thank you for reminding me that You hear the cries of your children and that You are a God who loves to bring beauty to our broken. Please meet me where I am today and give me the grace to grow through these trials.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Listen to Healer of the Broken on GodTube. Allow the words to be the prayer of your heart. If you were moved by the song please consider sharing it with a friend or post it on your facebook page.

Galatians 6:2 tells us to, "bear one another's burdens." What or who comes to mind as you read this?

Read and contemplate the following Scripture passage: "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted." (Psalm 34:18) How does this make you feel?

More from the Girlfriends
The song Healer of the Broken is featured on Gwen's Uncluttered CD. You can download the song from iTunesor Amazon– or order her CDs on www.GwenSmith.net.

God delights to heal and transform lives ... including your own.  In her book, Broken Into Beautiful, Gwen Smith invites you to experience how the unconditional love of Jesus can change your life and bring strength and healing to your heart.  He can transform your life into something beautiful. To order the book, go to Amazon or, for a signed copy, order from Gwen's website: www.gwensmith.net.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.


Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com
www.girlfriendsingod.com

[Judy Harder]

April  30, 2012
What Did You Say?
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
"A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver" (Proverbs 25:11).

Friend to Friend
Fruit is one of my favorite foods. When I go grocery shopping, it always takes me longer to get through the fruit section than any other area of the store. I spend what some might consider a ridiculously long time picking out what I hope will be the juiciest apples, the plumpest grapes and sweetest bananas. Experience has taught me to quickly discard any piece of fruit that is bruised, mushy or discolored. I shake cantaloupe and thump watermelons. Ripe strawberries have a unique sweet scent and only the reddest cherries will do. Plums and tomatoes must be firm to the touch, bright in color and wrinkle-free while the more wrinkles the better when it comes to choosing passion fruit.

On a recent trip to the grocery store, I was carefully making my fruit selections when the thought occurred to me that I spend more time choosing fruit than I spend choosing my words.

Words are power tools that can build and encourage. Words can also destroy and cause confusion. We have all been hurt and even defeated by words spoken in anger or words rising out of a wounded and bitter heart. I have been guilty of speaking damaging words with the ulterior motive of flaunting power or demonstrating control. It is so easy for my mouth to be in motion before my mind is in gear, and the result is rarely good or godly.

The words we speak can clarify or complicate a situation. I have watched my husband diffuse an emotional bomb and avoid a potentially explosive situation with a few carefully chosen and quietly spoken words of wisdom. I have also observed him in the art of confrontation – and with Dan, it really is an art. In fact, one person told me that he was halfway home before he realized that Dan had just confronted and corrected him.

Solomon offers great wisdom concerning the use of words, "Whoever controls his mouth protects his own life. Whoever has a big mouth comes to ruin" (Proverbs 13:3 GWT). If we do not learn to use and control our tongue, it will use and control us. While it is true that we need to choose our words carefully, it is just as true that the tongue is a spiritual thermometer that reflects the condition of the heart.

I am not a good patient and tend to think that most medical rules apply to everyone else in my life – but not to me. After all, I am a woman and I am a Southerland.  According to my husband, it doesn't get much tougher than that. Several years ago, I was slammed with a high fever and blinding headache that sent me to bed for days, something highly unusual for me. I called my doctor. When he heard my symptoms, he told me to come in immediately and even though his waiting room was full, he would make room for me in his already crowded schedule. His urgency was not encouraging.

The minute I walked in his office, the receptionist waved me back to the patient area where a nurse promptly escorted me to an examination room, hurriedly recorded my symptoms, took my temperature, glanced briefly at my throat and quickly left the room. Minutes later, the doctor and a nurse walked in and stood on the opposite side of the room, almost smiling at me. At this point, I realized that whatever I had was evidently highly contagious and probably fatal. I felt so awful that the latter was definitely appealing.

"Mary, I am almost certain you have viral meningitis," the doctor said. Seeing the blank look on my face, he explained, "Your abnormally high fever of 104 and severe headache are classic symptoms of meningitis, but we need to run some tests to verify my suspicions. Oh, and by the way, how long have you had the solid white coating on your tongue?" I was stunned! What coating? Why is the color of my tongue even important in determining my illness? The doctor continued, "The health of the tongue is a very strong indicator of the health of the entire body."

The same is true when it comes to the words we speak. "The mouth speaks the things that are in the heart. Good people have good things in their hearts, and so they say good things. But evil people have evil in their hearts, so they say evil things" (Matthew 12:34-35, NCV). If my words are boastful, my heart is insecure. If my words are filthy, my heart is impure and if my words are critical, my heart is filled with pride and anger. In other words, the problem is not really my mouth, it's my heart. The words I speak reflect the true condition of my heart.

Careless words can cause such grief. Unless strained through discipline and holiness, words can convey false perspectives and untruths. However, the right word, spoken at the right time and in the right way can bring order in the midst of confusion and light on a very dark path. I believe God gives us spiritual "radar" so we can assess a situation and speak the right word for that circumstance. We just need to check the "radar screen" before we speak.

Let's Pray
Father, I can be so careless with the words I speak. Forgive me. Please help me learn how to control my tongue. Create in me a clean heart, God, so that I can speak words filled with grace and love.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Read Colossians 4:6. "Let your conversation be gracious and effective so that you will have the right answer for everyone."

How would you describe words that are "gracious?"
How can our words be "effective" in the lives of others?
What do you think Paul means when he says that we can have the "right answer for everyone?"

More from the Girlfriends
The subject of taming the tongue is a hard one. Since communication is a gift from God, He has a plan for the right way to use it. My problem is that I tend to think my plan is better. I know. I can be arrogant ... and stubborn. Someone recently sent me this prayer: "Lord, keep Your arm around my shoulder and Your hand over my mouth." Amen!

Stressed out? Mary's book, Escaping the Stress Trapis based on Psalm 23 and will help you learn how to control the stress in your life instead of allowing stress to control you. Check it out!

Need a good laugh? Mary's MP3, Laugh More – Live Better, is a refreshing message filled with humor and Biblical principles that will help you learn how to celebrate life. (Also available as CD)

Need something for your pain? Enroll in Mary's weekly online Bible Study, How to Handle Hurtand learn how to face and deal with the pain in your life.

[Judy Harder]

May 1, 2012
Oil for My Lamp
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"Her lamp does not go out at night..." (Proverbs 31:18 NIV).

Friend to Friend
Driving along the coast and coming upon a lighthouse is an inspiring sight.  Even though the map marks where the landmarks are stationed, it still brings a thrill when each one comes into view. That's how I feel when I see a mother nurturing her child. It is nothing new, this love of a mother for her offspring, but each time I see it, my heart takes a leap. Lighthouses and mothers share some common features, yet each one is beautiful and unique. Her bright light shines, and her foundation is sure. But the most important feature is the oil in her lamp.

Recently, I stood looking at the Bodie Island Lighthouse with its bold black and white horizontal stripes painted on its solid exterior. She is quite a flashy beacon, to say the least. Then I turned to look at the rough seas that were beating against the shore. I thought about the mariners who were dependent on the lighthouse's searching beam to lead them safely to shore. What if she ran out of oil? What if she didn't shine? The ships were relying on her to be prepared and well supplied with oil.

Then I thought about my own life as a mother. Suppose I ran out of oil, my light grew dim, or worse, burned out altogether. What would happen to my little fleet?

The blessed mother in Proverbs 31:18 also had a lamp. Scripture says that "her lamp did not go out at night." I used to read that verse and think, Doesn't this woman ever sleep!  But then I realized that it wasn't so much about her staying awake all night, as it was about her lamp. She never let her oil run dry.

A lighthouse has one primary mission: to broadcast light so a mariner can see the shore.  Likewise, a mother is a beacon that displays the Light to guide her children through an ocean of choices. A mother's light is Jesus Christ, and she can't shine that light if her lamp runs dry.

Ephesians 5:18 tells us, "Be filled with the Holy Spirit." That "be filled" is a present tense, continuous action verb. It means be filled daily and continually. And interestingly enough, many times in Scripture the Holy Spirit is referred to as...you guessed it...oil!

How does a mother run out of oil? In Max Lucado's book, Just Like Jesus, he tells a story that gives us a clue.

"A lighthouse keeper who worked on a rocky stretch of coastline received oil once a month to keep his light burning bright. Not being far from the village, he had frequent guests. One night a woman needed oil to keep her family warm. Another night a father needed oil for his lamp.  Then another needed oil to lubricate a wheel. All the requests seemed legitimate, so the lighthouse keeper tried to meet them all. Toward the end of the month, however, he ran out of oil and his lighthouse went dark, causing several ships to crash on the coastline. The man was reproved by his superiors, 'You were given the oil for one reason,' they said, 'to keep the light burning.'"

As mothers in the twenty-first century, we are tempted to meet every need that comes our way. But our primary job is to love the Lord, love our husbands, and nurture our children. All the other needs that scream for our attention, though they are noble, must wait until we take care of our families first.

Let's Pray
Dear Lord, Thank You for this family that You have given me. I pray that I will be careful to take care of their needs before the needs of others who scream for my attention. Help me to be a woman with a balanced life: God first, husband second, children third.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Have you ever run out of oil?  Out of strength?  Out of energy?
That's a silly question!  We all have!

Which statement best describes your life?
I am burning my light like a candle that consumes itself.
I am burning like an oil lamp fueled by an endless supply of the Holy Spirit's power.

Write a prayer asking God to fuel you with the Holy Spirit's power today.

More from the Girlfriends:
No one ever said being a parent would be easy. If it were, I don't think it would start with something called "labor!" If you would like to learn more about how to be a great parent, see Sharon's book, Being a Great Mom-Raising Great Kids.Also, Sharon offers a 4x5 laminated prayer cardof Scripture to pray for your children or grandchildren.

[Judy Harder]

May 2, 2012
Run!
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Don't turn off the road of goodness; keep away from evil paths (Proverbs 4:27, NCV).

Friend to Friend
At the close of the sermon, a church member came forward to speak with the pastor. He was very upset because of the sin in his life and his blatant disobedience to God. With tears streaming down his face, the repentant man took the pastor's hand to confess that his life was full of sin, but what came out was, "My sin is full of life." I can relate.

I don't know about you, but my sin is definitely "full of life." I am always amused but also saddened by people who think that just because I am in full time ministry, I am holier than they are, better than they are or don't have to battle sin like they do. Just ask my husband and children. They will blow that theory right out of the water. I'm just thankful our cats can't talk! The fact is, as long as I live in this fallen world and sport this frail humanity, I will wrestle with sin.

However, I have refined several tactics for dealing with my sinful nature. Rationalization is one of my personal favorites. And there is always the handy comparison ploy – measuring my sin against the sin of another. At times, I subscribe to the popular "bury it and hope it will go away" tactic. The reality is that nothing satisfies the payment sin demands except the blood of Jesus Christ and my response to His sacrifice in true, unadulterated repentance - on my face before my Holy God.

When we turn our lives over to God, He sets our feet on the right path. But to stay on that path requires a continual choice to run from sin. With our flawed choices, we take side trips, create detours and wind up on the wrong road headed in the wrong direction. Solomon warns us to stay away from evil paths. "Don't turn off the road of goodness; keep away from evil paths" (Proverbs 4:27, NLT). "Keep away" literally means "to turn aside or drag from." In other words, when we see sin or even the opportunity to sin, we should turn around and run in the opposite direction. We should "drag ourselves" away from sin. What do we do instead? We flirt with sin. We want to be delivered from temptation but would really like to keep in touch. We pray for God to "lead us not into temptation" and then deliberately place ourselves in its path. In our arrogance, we think we can handle sin and the temptation to sin on our own. That very attitude is an open invitation for the enemy, daring him to take his best shot.   

My husband, Dan, was the pastor of Flamingo Road Church in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, for many years. A man of great wisdom, Dan was adamant about the fact that neither he nor his staff should ever put themselves in a situation that flirted with sin or made it easier to sin. Solid wooden office doors were replaced with glass doors. No pastor was allowed to meet with a woman for any reason unless one of the other staff members was present. A staff counselor was hired to handle anyone needing more than one counseling session. The staff often went to lunch following their regular Tuesday morning staff meeting and even though the restaurant was literally across the street from the church, no man was allowed to ride alone with a woman. Sound ridiculous?  Seem absurd? Not at all! Dan simply refused to provide ammunition for the enemy. The bottom line is that it's foolish and dangerous to flirt with sin.

There is no holding pattern for believers nor can we live in a neutral state. We are either going forward or backward. We are either being renewed or consumed. Girlfriend, do not relinquish any more life territory to the enemy. Run from sin!

Let's Pray
Father, forgive me for the sin in my life. Right now, I choose to turn away from that sin. I turn to You, Lord. I know that I am lost and totally helpless without You. Thank You for the unconditional love and unending forgiveness that I find in You.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Read 1 Corinthians 10:13. "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it" (NIV).

Consider the following promises found in 1 Corinthians 10:13. What do they mean to you and how do they apply to your life?

·         No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind.
·         God is faithful.
·         He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.
·         He will provide a way out.

More from the Girlfriends
While it is true that we all face many temptations every single day, it is just as true that God will strengthen us to withstand each one. Need help? Mary's E-Book Bible Study, Winning the War with Temptation, offers five steps you can take to help you resist temptation and live a life of victory.

If you need help learning how to understand and apply the truths of God, enroll in Mary's weekly online Bible Study, Light for the Journey . Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.