Girlfriends in God

[Judy Harder]

January 25, 2012
The Beauty of Romantic Love
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"Show me your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet and your face is lovely," (Song of Songs 2;14 NIV).

Friend to Friend
Aren't you glad that God refers to the Church as the Bride of Christ? I asked my husband what pictures come into his mind when he reads God's description of the Church as the Bride of Christ. He gave me a strange look and said, "none, really." I'll admit, I can't picture Steve walking down the aisle in a flowing wedding gown, but oh sister, I can see myself dressed in a satin and lace, pearl-studded gown with a flowing veil, and walking down the aisle of heaven to meet Jesus—my heavenly Bridegroom. Can't you? What glorious imagery God has given to His female image bearers.

Perhaps one of the most romantic books in the Bible is the Song of Songs, or as some translations title it, The Song of Solomon. While it can be read as King Solomon's wooing the Shulammite woman working in the fields, many theologians, including Augustine, Matthew Henry, Charles Spurgeon, Hudson Taylor, and at least one gal from the South, see it as an allegory of Jesus wooing the heart of His Bride.

I have been like the Shulammite woman who questioned God's pursuit. She felt unworthy of her suitor's advances. "Do not stare at me because I am dark, because I am darkened by the sun," she cried (Song of Songs 1:6). Her hands were stained from tending her brothers' vineyard. Her skin was burnt by the blazing sun. Her feet were calloused from walking bare on hardened ground. But the king looked past all the outward signs of a hard-lived life, and saw only her beauty.

When I first read those words through the lens of Jesus pursuing me, tears filled my eyes. And yet, the tears were not for the Shulammite woman. The tears were for myself.

I grew up in a home riddled with cyclical bursts of physical violence and constant emotional turmoil. My father drank very heavily and my parents fought, both verbally and physically, in front of me. Many nights I went to bed, pulled the covers up around my chin, and prayed that I would hurry up and go to sleep to shut out the noise of the yelling, screaming, and arguing in the next room. My parents were so wrapped up in their own problems, they were unsure how to show love to their children. I lived in a beautiful house and all my physical needs were cared for. But my heart was hungry for something I couldn't define. An undercurrent of inferiority, insecurity, and inadequacy ran through my entire existence and became the window through which I viewed my little world.

From my earliest remembrance, I felt that I wasn't good enough, smart enough, or pretty enough. Looking back through my scrapbook of photos, I was actually a cute little girl. However, when someone feels ugly, the mirror on the wall somehow bypasses the reflection in the glass and goes right to the heart. No wonder my daddy doesn't love me, I thought on many occasions.

And yet, the King spied me in the fields and wooed me. Through a two-year courtship, Jesus pursued my adolescent heart until I finally stopped shunning His advances and allowed myself to be caught. "I am my Beloved's and His desire is for me."  Every girl's dream.

There are many different types of love: motherly love, friendship love, patriotic love, and a host of other shades and varieties. But romantic love brings with it colors and hues that are specific and unique to every other on the spectrum of emotions. Lovers are consumed with ways to make each other happy. They long for together times and feel a sense of loss when apart. Lovers are willing to sacrifice just about anything to be together. They lie awake at night dreaming up ways to make the other happy. An embrace. A kiss. A word. A look. Each of these ordinary movements between friends or acquaintances becomes rapturous between lovers. How lovely that God has chosen romantic love to describe how He feels about you. And what He really desires is for you to express that love in return in an intimate relationship.

Let's Pray
Jesus, I honestly don't know what you saw in me, but I'm so glad You thought I was worth pursuing. I do love You so. Thank You for pursuing me and catching me in your love net. I am captivated by Your love.
In Your Name, Amen

Now It's Your Turn
Look up the following verses in the Song of Songs and envision Jesus saying the words to you!

Song of Songs 1:9,15; 2:2,14; 4:1-7 

More than the love story between a woman who felt unworthy of attention and a man captivated by her beauty—the Song of Songs is a beautiful picture of Jesus wooing and winning His Bride...you. You have captured Jesus' attention just as surely as the Shulammite maiden captured the young King's who eyed her in the fields.

More from the Girlfriends
Have you ever felt like you weren't smart enough, pretty enough, or just not good enough? Well, God thinks differently. If you would like to learn how to have the confidence of a woman who knows she is deeply loved, completely forgiven and powerfully equipped to do all God has called her to do, then Sharon's book, I'm Not Good Enough...and Other Lies Women Tell Themselves,is the book for you. Begin seeing yourself as God sees you and leave those lies behind.



January 26, 2012
Just Give Up!
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death (Romans 8:1-2, NIV).

Friend to Friend
I will never forget the day I discovered that our son is not perfect. In fact, I came to the horrifying realization that he is a sinner – just like his mother. Jered was about six months old and crawling everywhere. I had just returned from running errands and was busy putting groceries away in the kitchen, which had a pass-through opening that enabled me to keep an eye on Jered while I worked. He seemed content as he played with his toys, occasionally taking a break to terrorize our two cats.

When Jered first began to crawl, we removed anything that could hurt him, most of our breakables and everything of sentimental value. We had, however, left a beautiful conch seashell on the living room coffee table and used it to begin the arduous but vital task of teaching Jered the meaning of "no." We would repeatedly point to the shell, touch it and say, "No, no!"  Of course, he was a brilliant child, but I was not sure if he had really grasped the whole concept – until that momentous day.

With the last of the groceries put away, I dumped a bag of potatoes into the kitchen sink and began peeling them for dinner. Glancing up, I saw Jered staring at the alluring shell, a mischievous grin of anticipation on his face. He suddenly launched into a fast crawl straight toward the forbidden shell. I winced as I pictured what he could do to that shell and what the sharp-edged shell could do to his small, tender hands. I called out in a firm but confident voice, "Jered, do not touch that shell!" Immediately, in mid-crawl, he stopped, sat up and looked back at me while seeming to consider his options and weigh the consequences. As I repeated the warning, he joyfully clapped his hands, flashing me his most adorable smile. What a great kid!  He's got it! I started around the corner to give him a hug and praise him for his obedience when he took off like a shot, crawling as fast as his chubby little hands and knees would carry him. Reaching the coffee table, Jered grabbed the shell and plopped it in his lap like a hard-earned trophy. I gasped in disbelief as his face reflected total triumph. He knew exactly what he was doing, and he was not one bit sorry! My perfect little boy had a rebellious streak -- just like his mother.

Each and every one of us was born with a nature that loves to rebel and feed a natural "bent" toward selfish, wrong choices. However, when we come to Christ, we receive a new nature that naturally desires to obey God. The result is internal civil war. The Apostle Paul struggled with sin just like we do today. In his letter to the church at Rome, Paul describes his frustration with his own sin: "I don't understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don't do it.  Instead, I do the very thing I hate" (Romans 7:15, NLT). Sound familiar? I will never forget the first time I read those ardent words written by this zealous man of God. I was so relieved! It sometimes seems as if I am the only believer engaged in major battles with sin. Paul's words, however, assure me that I am not in this battle alone. Neither are you, girlfriend. The reality is that as long as we live in this broken and fallen world, our sinful nature and our God nature will constantly be at war.

How do we win that war? The solution is very simple, but very expensive. In fact, it will cost us everything, beginning with the total control of our lives. To win this war between the old and new nature, we must constantly surrender to God, allowing Him to guide, direct and empower us to live for Him. I love how one man described his own war against sin. "It is like there are two dogs fighting within me, an old dog and a new dog. The one who will win is the one I feed the most."

While the old nature is fed by the world and encouraged to enjoy the sin it so freely offers, God lovingly urges us to strengthen the new nature He has given us by reading, studying and applying the Bible, by praying and spending time with other believers and by serving Him. Certain victory is ours when we constantly choose against the old nature while surrendering to the power of the Holy Spirit. Join me in giving up! Victory is on the way!

Let's Pray
Lord, I want to please You and obey You. So many times, I make the wrong choice and give in to the sin that constantly draws me. Today, I choose against that sin and give myself to You.  Thank You for the power of Your Word and for the precious gift of prayer, through which I find the strength to stand firm.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal the sin in your life that you have refused to face. Write that sin down, confess it and ask God to forgive you. Now destroy the paper on which you wrote the sin and thank God for His forgiving power. Consider the following questions and write your responses in your journal.

What is the most powerful sin in my life?
How does this sin influence my relationships, behavior, attitudes, etc?
What is the first step I need to take to rid my life of this sin?
What specific actions can I take to strengthen the choice I have made to turn from this sin?

Read, memorize and record the following verses in your journal.

2 Thessalonians 3:3 "But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one" (NIV).

Isaiah 41:10 "Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand" (NLT).

More from the Girlfriends
Be sure to check out the FREE MP3son Mary's website.

Need help dealing with the sin and temptation you encounter in your life? Get Mary's E-Bible Study, Winning the War With Temptation for practical and powerful steps you can take to live a life of victory. .

Need help getting the Word of God into your life?Check out Mary's Weekly Online Bible Study, When I Am Afraid, to learn how to face, deal with and surrender your fears to God.

Are you ready to begin a new faith adventure?Get a copy of our new book, Trusting God.

[Judy Harder]

January 27, 2012
Trusting God with Your Tomorrows
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
The LORD said to him, "Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the LORD? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say (Exodus 4:11-12, NIV).

Friend to Friend
On the far side of a desert, high upon the mountain of God, a voice called out to Moses from within a curious, fiery bush. He had been tending the sheep of his father-in-law's flock, minding his own business, going about his normal day-in-day-out tasks when God spoke to him from the flames. On the day that God called Moses to a fresh and fiery mission. A mission of deliverance.

Once a noble prince of Egypt with the world at his feet, Moses had become a lowly shepherd with dust on his sandals. His crown had been traded in for a staff. The palace days were far behind Moses now. He fled them because of what he had done. Glancing to his left and his right to be sure that no one would see what he was about to do, Moses took a horrible situation into his own hands and killed a man. He had murdered an Egyptian and covered the body with sand.

Fear and shame bombarded his heart so he fled—away from his dream-filled, royal future to a desert place of humble hiding. The door to his yesterdays was closed. Moses had moved on to a new place. His past was his past and he had no intention of returning to it. His life was different now. Normal, not noble.

Then God interrupted Moses's new normal. He made it undeniably clear that His plans for Moses were different. Bigger. God's intentions were for freedom—the freedom of His people, the Israelites, who were captives, slaves to Egypt. God called Moses to face the pains of his past so that the Israelites could face a future of freedom. His plans of emancipation required that Moses obey Him, listen to His voice, follow His instructions, and trust Him.

Moses quivered and doubted. He made excuses about why he couldn't do it. He felt completely unfit and unqualified for such a task. It was risky. But God met Moses at his doubts. He called him to courage and went on to use Moses as an instrument of deliverance, truth, power, and freedom. Yes, Moses made mistakes along the way, but God was powerful in, through, and in spite of each one. Through it all, God led as only God can. He led with power. He led with purpose. He led with love. And through Moses, God led His people to a new place of promise and freedom.

On the far side of Charlotte, North Carolina, high upon a mountain in a retreat center, a voice called out to me from within a curious and fiery story. I had been tending to my husband and children, to the laundry and the dishes, writing songs and leading worship at women's events, minding my own business, and going about my normal

day-in-day-out tasks on the day that God spoke to my heart through the testimony of another woman. On the day that God called me to a fresh and fiery mission. A mission of deliverance.

Once a sold-out, dream-filled God-girl, I had become a grace-embracing yet disqualified-for-anything-big-because-of-what-I-had-done God-girl. My use-me-in-a-big-way-Lord prayers had been traded in for average can't-have-a-dream-anymore faith-living. My God-dream days were far behind me. I had fled them because of what I had done in my junior year of college. Glancing to my left and right to be sure that no one would know what I was about to do, I took a horrible situation—an unplanned pregnancy—into my own hands and killed a baby. I robbed life from my own child when I had an abortion, and I covered over the death of my precious child with sands of compartmentalization and reason.

Fear and shame bombarded my heart, so I fled—away from God, away from my dream-filled, royal future to a desert place of heart-hiding. After a season of brokenness, God brought me to a place of beauty, forgiveness, and healing. I was restored and redeemed by scandalous, merciful grace. The door to my yesterdays was closed. I moved on to a new place in Christ. My past was my past and I had no intentions of returning to it—or to the God-dreams that swelled my heart when I was a young, sold-out Jesus lover. My life was different now. Normal, not dream-worthy.

Then God interrupted my new normal. He made it undeniably clear that His plans for me were different. Bigger. God's intentions were for freedom—the freedom of His people, the women who were captives, slaves to their life-wounds. God called me to face the pains of my past so that my Girlfriends in God might face a future of freedom

when they hear my testimony. His plans of emancipation required that I obey Him, listen to His voice, follow His instructions, and trust Him.

I quivered and doubted. I made excuses about why I couldn't do it. I felt completely unfit and unqualified for such a task. It was risky. But God met me at my doubts. He called me to courage and is using my broken-into-beautiful story as an instrument of deliverance, truth, power, and freedom. Yes, I make mistakes along the way, but God is powerful in, through, and in spite of each one. Through each surrendered day, God is leading as only He can. With power, with purpose, with love. And I pray right now that this story—my story—will bring you to a new place of promise and freedom through the grace of Jesus Christ.

What fresh and fiery mission is God calling you to trust Him with, friend? Let me encourage you to stop with the excuses. I'm living proof that God will free anyone from her shame and can use anyone for His purpose. Step up to the burning bush—into God's presence. Listen to His voice. Obey. Follow. Take courage. Trust Him with your past and with your tomorrows. Allow His grace and love to decide what your mission should look like.

But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power
and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.
(Exodus 9:16)

Let's Pray
Dear God, with a trembling heart, I approach Your throne of grace today in reverence and humility, fully aware that You are holy and I am not. Speak, Lord. Show me the plans You have for me. Bind me to Your Word and to Your strength so I will have the courage to obey. May my brokenness be restored for the beauty of Your glory. Please help me to trust You with my today and my tomorrows. In Jesus's name I pray, amen.

Now It's Your Turn

·         Take a few moments to consider where you've come from and where you feel God is leading you.
·         Do you trust Him? Are you concerned about not being "able" or "qualified"?
·         Commit your today and tomorrows to Him. Journal about what that might look like.

More from the Girlfriends
Welcome to my personal pulse. This type of transparency is always risky. My pulse races each time I expose the broken places of my past and my present – but GOD is always faithful to use it in some beautiful way. Some of you may feel this devotion was written specifically for you. Don't ignore that. Explore it. Please come to my Facebook page today and share your heart with me. www.facebook.com/GwenSmithMusic. We will pray over each of you!

Gwen's full testimony is featured in her book, Broken into Beautiful, along with Scriptural truths and stories of how God has brought restoration the hearts of many other women who had painful life wounds. God delights to transform lives ... including your own. Experience God's healing and hope in your life today as you read Broken Into Beautiful! To order the book, go to Amazon or, for a signed copy, visit Gwen's website: www.gwensmith.net.

Today's GiG devotion is adapted from Trusting God by Sharon Jaynes, Gwen Smith, & Mary Southerland by permission of Multnomah, division of Random House, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.

[Judy Harder]

January 30
God is the God of Lost Things
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, 'rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.' In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents," (Luke 15:9 NIV).

Friend to Friend
It was New Year's Eve. Steve and I had shared a wonderful meal with friends and then circled a table for a feisty card game called Shanghi. As I reached to pick up my first hand, I noticed a void in my wedding ring. "Oh no," I cried, "Part of my wedding ring is missing. One of the diamonds is gone!"

My wedding ring (which I received on our twentieth anniversary) has one diamond solitaire in the middle with two little triangles, called trillions, on each side. It was one of the settings for the triangle that lay empty.

My mind retraced my steps through the day. I had cleaned the bathrooms, vacuumed the house, and crafted two new upholstered pillows for the living room sofa. I envisioned the little triangular diamond going down the drain, sucked up in the vacuum cleaner, or sewn into the inside of a pillow. Of course we retraced my steps at our friend's home, but most likely it had fallen out before I got there.

On New Year's Day, I woke up thinking about the diamond and chatting with God about it. "Lord, I know this is like looking for a needle in a haystack, but would you please help me find that sliver of diamond?"

I got up, fixed a cup of coffee, and decided to go up stairs and look in the very messy, beige carpeted, sewing room. A haystack if there ever was one. Of course stuck in a haystack is better than going down a drain.

As I turned to go up the wooden steps of the stairs, I saw a tiny sliver of sparkle. You guessed it! The little trillion sat poised as if placed by a Holy Hand. I believe it was. A Sudden Glory!

You know, sometimes God answers a prayer and remains anonymous, or hidden. We wonder...could that have been Him?

And then sometimes He is so obvious you know that you know that He has intervened in your life in a very real and miraculous way.

"Do you think God cares about diamonds?" Steve asked.

"I think He cares about lost things?" I replied.

The next day, I took the diamond to the jewelers to have it reset. "How in the world did you find this little thing?" the Jewish Jeweler asked. So I told him.

Let's Pray
Dear God, thank You for caring about the little things in my life. There are no coincidences. There is no luck. You are in it all.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Have you ever lost anything and asked God to help you find it?

Did you suddenly realize where it was?

Did you find it in a strange place?

Hmmm. How do you think that happened?

Read Matthew 17:24- 27. How in the world did that coin end up in that fish's mouth?
Is that a fun story or what!

Would you like to see the little diamond on the step? I took a picture to help me remember the God of Lost Things. You can see it on my facebook page at www.facebook.com/sharonjaynes

More from the Girlfriends
I have a new website with more videos, free resources, archived articles and fun pictures. Come by for a visit and tell me what you think. www.sharonjaynes.com.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.


Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com
www.girlfriendsingod.com

[Judy Harder]

January 31, 2012
Looking for God?
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Praise the LORD! For he has heard my cry for mercy. The LORD is my strength, my shield from every danger. I trust in him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving (Psalm 28:6-7, NLT).

Friend to Friend
God is constantly at work in our lives, preparing us to do with joy what He created us to do. A.B. Simpson said: "God is preparing His heroes. And when the opportunity comes He can fit them into their place in a moment.  And the world will wonder where they came from." When we understand that God integrates every life detail to accomplish His will, a deeper level of trust is born in our hearts.

God wants us to trust Him in every circumstance. Trust is letting go, knowing that God is more than enough. Trust is obedience because what I do reveals what I believe about God regardless of what I say. I don't think God wastes His direction on a disobedient heart but does, in fact, reveal His plans to those who will obey them. Trust and obedience go hand in hand. The more we obey, the more we will trust and the more we trust, the more we will obey, understanding that He is indeed Lord of all. The result is joy.

We should be women of joy. That is life at its best. However, if we live under the burden of circumstances instead of seeing God in their midst, our hearts will be filled with emotional chaos or spiritual rebellion, and there will be no joy. As Christians, we should be the most joyful people on earth, heart and soul at rest, because we serve the God of all circumstances, Lord of every mountain and Shepherd of every valley. However, this week alone, I have talked with both men and women who are ready to walk away from their lives all because in their hearts, marriages and ministries, there is neither joy nor peace. They cannot see God in their circumstances. The darkness is closing in as they struggle to stay afloat on the storm-tossed seas of strained relationships fueled by exhaustion, burnout, depression and a lack of purpose for living. Anger is a constant companion, and bitterness shadows each step. This is not the way life is supposed to be – is it?

When we fail to faithfully and continually seek God, we will likely forfeit our joy to human idols and lifeless activities in which we often exchange holiness for tolerance. No wonder we sometimes find life impotent and dismal when it should be powerful and filled with unshakable joy. We are to be vessels containing, and naturally spilling out, the joy of the Lord on those in our lives. That joy is our strength and the salt that makes others thirst to know Him more. Instead of focusing on what is wrong in life, we need to look on the "right" side of life.

A little girl and her father were taking a walk one night. They lived way out in the country on a remote farm far from the neon signs of the city. The night was still and dark, cloaked in reverent silence. Lightning bugs pranced through the tall grass and the onyx skies, celebrating life itself. Father and daughter walked in comfortable silence, satisfied just to be together. With a contented sigh, the little girl looked up into the dark skies filled with winking stars that seemed on the verge of bursting into sparkling worship of their Creator, God Himself. The little girl was overwhelmed and cried out, "Oh, Daddy!  If the wrong side of heaven is so beautiful, I wonder what the right side looks like!"

We live on the wrong side of heaven. This world is not our home. It is a broken place filled with unspeakable pain and crushed dreams. Even so, we can live in this foreign land for a while – with joy -- knowing that home is waiting, celebrating here because of what we have there. "The Message" translates the words of Paul in Philippians 4:4 this way, "Celebrate God all day, every day. Revel in him!" I love it! Paul is calling us to party!  That's right! We are to celebrate God every minute of every day for as many days as we have. "Revel" literally means "to party, to raise the roof" or, as my Mama used to say, "paint the town red." Every day we have a choice to make when it comes to our perspective on life. That choice then determines our attitudes which then lead to the actions that determine success or failure and the quality with which we live and serve.

Paul is serious about joy, and his instructions are clear. We are to be joyful - always.  I know that many times, life makes it impossible to be happy but happiness is not what Paul is talking about. Happiness is a cheap imitation of true joy, depending totally upon man-made circumstances, while joy is an inside job and depends totally upon God's presence in the midst of those circumstances.  Nehemiah 8:10 reminds us that "the joy you have in the LORD is your strength" (GWT).  Remember that joy is not a feeling but rather a chosen perspective that recognizes the fact that God is in control. I am not talking about the power of positive thinking. I am talking about a real, honest-to-goodness transformation of the perspective from which we live. I'm talking about the power of God, active and present in every circumstance. Don't settle for Pharisaical religion or slot-filling, box-checking church activity. Settle for nothing less than the unexplainable but undeniable power of God's presence at work in your life. 

Let's Pray
Father, thank You for the joy you have given me through Your love, mercy and grace. Forgive me for the times I take that joy for granted. Teach me how to look for you in the circumstances of my daily life. I want to celebrate Your presence even when I may not understand or even like Your process. I want to learn to trust You more and walk by faith.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Ask yourself the following questions:

How can I train my heart and mind to look for God at work in my life? 
In what ways does an awareness of God's presence change the way I live each day? 
Begin each day by setting the focus of your heart and mind on seeking God. Look for His handprint in every person you encounter. Keep John 3:16 in the forefront of your thoughts. Praise Him the minute you recognize His power at work around you. Share that revelation with a friend and record it in your journal.

More from the Girlfriends
Be sure to check out the FREE MP3son Mary's website.

Need help experiencing peace in your life? Mary's E-Bible Study, How to Find Your Missing Peace for practical and powerful steps you can take to live a life of victory.

Need help getting the Word of God into your life?Check out Mary's Weekly Online Bible Study, When I Am Afraid, to learn how to face, deal with and surrender your fears to God.

Are you ready to begin a new faith adventure?Get a copy of our new book, Trusting God.

[Judy Harder]

February 1, 2012
Can You Love Your Husband and Brad Pitt Too?
Sharon Jaynes
(If you are single, you're not off the hook here. Keep reading.)

Today's Truth
"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life" (Proverbs 4:23 NIV).

Friend to Friend
Sitting in a waiting room, I rummaged through stacks of magazines to pass the time. A magazine for families, I thought as I picked up a popular title. That ought to be safe.

Thumbing through the pages, I went directly to the "Family Matters" column to see what the culture was teaching these days. The title? "Why You can Love Your Husband and Brad Pitt Too." I turned back to the cover to make sure I had not inadvertently picked up Cosmopolitan or The National Inquirer. Nope it was a magazine for families – targeted at wives and mothers.

This is some of what the author had to say.

Last spring I found myself applying a pretty shade of pink lipstick before heading off to the nursery to buy annuals. Why the fuss? I hoped to run into the handsome gentleman who worked there....According to experts, married crushes are natural and common. As long as you don't let them develop into full blown fantasies or consider acting upon them, these minor attractions can actually help you appreciate your spouse more...Infatuations offer a safe break from the marital routine. Everyday life is a bit humdrum, making it hard to maintain a passionate connection all the time...

Well friends, there is another expert on marriage who was not quoted in this article and his teaching is the antithesis of this one. His name is Jesus. This is what He has to say about infatuation with the delivery boy, flirting with the man at the nursery, or cattily toying with a coworker in the next cubicle.   

"You have heard it said, Do not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:27-28).

Looking at another man with a flirtatious eye is such a serious offense that Jesus went on to say, "If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away," (Matthew 5:29). Now, don't worry, I'm not going to tell you to pluck out your eye if you do have a crush on the buff young man who bags your produce at the grocery store, but I am telling you that you might need to shop elsewhere. I am saying that if you find yourself adding a bit of lip gloss before heading to the post office where the cute blond with the steel blue eyes always greets you like you've made his day, you need to forget the gloss and go to another post office. And that man in the next cubicle who always showers you with compliments and makes your heart skip a beat? I think Jesus is saying to pluck it out, change cubicles, or even more drastic, change jobs.

Perhaps you think I've gone just a bit too far. I imagine the folks listening to Jesus' advice about running from temptation thought so too. The truth is, I've never known one woman who had an affair which did not begin with a toying glance or flirtatious "innocent" bantering. Every sin begins with a thought and every spiritual battle is won or lost at the threshold of the mind.

Let's face it, women long to feel beautiful. After being married for a few years and having a baby or two, we begin to wonder if we are still pretty or sexually appealing. Then a man comes along who pays us a compliment and our hearts skip a beat. That is natural. However, if that compliment or attention leads to infatuation, returning for more, or a "crush" as the article implied, Jesus tells us to turn and run in the opposite direction...press the delete button...and avoid reply.  "Flee sexual immorality," (1 Corinthians 6:18). This is serious...pluck it out.

It is interesting that when Satan tempted Eve in the garden, the first step to her downfall was her eyes.  "When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye...." (Genesis 3:6). It all began with her eyes...what she looked at. I wonder what would have happened if she had chosen to look away.

The above article had very little to do with Brad Pitt or Mel Gibson, but more to say about men we come in contact with everyday. Honestly, had it been Brad or Mel, I might have had a chuckle. But this article was encouraging women to play with fire. The author went on to say...

Whether you have a soft spot for Mel Gibson or Mel the mailman, make sure your husband knows that a crush doesn't change the way you feel about him. We all want to know that we are number one in our spouse's life. As for me, I told my husband about the man at the nursery. 'Going to see your boyfriend?' he teased as I headed out the door to buy mulch. Later I assured him that while Garden Guy knew the best cure for aphids; he could never melt my heart.

I read that and tried to imagine my husband, Steve, saying to me...."Honey, I want to tell you that I have a crush on the check out girl at Home Depot, but I still love you the best." I get a queasy feeling just thinking about such a conversation. And yet, this is what the "family magazine" was suggesting for women of the new millennium. No wonder the divorce rate in this country is 50% and rising.

But what if you are single? Does this apply to you? Absolutely!  The enemy would like nothing better than for you, in your singleness, to fantasize about a man that you come in contact with on a regular basis. He would like for your mind to go where it need not go. He knows that singleness can be a lonely place and he is an equal opportunity tempter.

Bottom line?  "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life," (Proverbs 4:23 NIV). The heart of the matter is the matter of the heart.

Let's Pray
Dear Heavenly Father, help me to guard my heart today and every day. Help me to recognize temptation and flee – run in the opposite direction. I know that temptation is not a toy to be played with, but an evil weapon used against us. Thank You for giving me the power of the Holy Spirit to resist temptation and the power of the Truth in Scripture to fight the lies that "I would be happy if..."
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Is there any area in your life where you are toying with temptation?

If you are single, have you been entertaining a relationship that would not be pleasing to God?

Go back and print off today's devotion. Highlight the various verses and commit them to memory. Make them part of your arsenal to resist temptation.

What are some ways that we can resist temptation? Let's share at www.facebook.com/sharonjaynes.

More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was adapted from Sharon's book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams: Seven Qualities Every Man Longs For.  If you would like to learn more about how to have a wonderful marriage, this book is for you.  And, if you would like to learn more about how to resist the lies of the enemy in every area of life, you'll want to see Sharon's book, I'm Not Good Enough...and Other Lies  Women Tell Themselves. When it comes to spiritual warfare, let's be armed and dangerous to the enemy's lies.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.


Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com
www.girlfriendsingod.com

[Judy Harder]

February 2, 2012
Remodeling 101
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
Colossians 3:13 "Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."

Friend to Friend
I promised myself that I would never buy a house that could be described as a "fixer-upper." I don't like fixing things. I want everything to be fixed before I move in. But there I was -- buying a town house that needed so much work even the realtor couldn't believe my husband and I wanted to buy it. Why didn't someone stop me? No one did, so the sale was made and we went to work. Actually, my son and husband went to work while I went crazy.

I had no idea how horrible the process of remodeling could be. Layer after layer of dirt, grime, stains and ugliness was stripped away. Rotten kitchen cabinets were torn from the walls and rusty appliances were replaced. We basically gutted the whole place and rebuilt it – while living in it. I was not happy!

I will never forget the day I woke up to see a toilet sitting at the foot of our bed. It was at that moment I resolved to never set foot in another house that required so much work. I am so thankful God does not feel that way about me.

Honestly, I used to wonder why God didn't just demolish the old me and build a new one. Then He did just that – through a two-year battle with clinical depression. While sitting at the bottom of that deep, dark and slimy pit, the Father lovingly stripped away old fears and insecurities. From the walls of my heart, He tore the rotten attitudes, undisciplined thoughts and unholy desires that had walked me to the edge of my pit; then pushed me in. He replaced rusty old dreams with new ones and basically, gutted my life to build a new one, a better one, and a stronger one. Part of that new life was forgiveness. God taught me how to forgive myself so I could then forgive others.

Because forgiveness is so important, it only stands to reason that there are roadblocks that can hinder our willingness to forgive. We must make the commitment to identify and remove each one.

Selfishness
Selfishness shouts, "I have been hurt! It is so unfair. I have rights!" What I am really saying is that how I feel about the hurt is more important than forgiving the hurt.

Pride
Pride cries, "Look at what they have done to me. Don't they realize who I am?" To receive or give forgiveness requires humility.

Low self-esteem
Some of us have built an entire identity around a hurt. The attention we gain from the wrong we have suffered defines who we are. It is something we cherish and refuse to relinquish for the sake of forgiveness.

Blindness
We may be blind to the fact that we have not forgiven a hurt. We have convinced ourselves that we really have forgiven the one who hurt us by going through the motions and saying the right words without really dealing with the pain. In reality, all we have done is dig a hole and bury the pain. As long as hurt is buried alive, it will keep resurrecting itself in our life, but when the hurt is dealt with and forgiveness is given, the pain is buried dead – and it stays dead.

Pain
Forgiveness is spiritual surgery. It exposes old hurts that have never completely healed. We can move, change jobs, change churches, change friends or even change families, but until we yank up the root of bitterness and cover it with forgiveness, we will live with unresolved pain.

Ignorance
Maybe we don't know how to forgive someone because are under the impression that forgiveness is an emotion or feeling. True forgiveness is a choice – a deliberate choice to release the person who has hurt us from the pain they have caused. We can stop forgiving others when God stops forgiving us.   

We need to identify and eliminate the roadblocks to forgiveness so God can set us free, heal our pain and make us more like Him. Now that is a remodeling job I would welcome.

Let's Pray
Father, I praise You for the changes You have made in my life through the power of Your forgiveness. Please help me forgive the people who have hurt me just as You have forgiven me.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Now it's Your Turn
Emotional pain can cripple our lives unless we deal with it and forgive the hurt. A family member has wounded you and shows no sign of remorse. Maybe a friend has betrayed you and refuses to apologize. Or you may be struggling to forgive yourself because you don't think you deserve to be forgiven. None of us deserves forgiveness. Forgiveness is a gift from God. Today is the day to make the choice to forgive. Beside each statement below, write the name of someone in your life who needs your forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not limited to those who deserve it. ______________________________
Forgiveness is not limited to those who apologize. ______________________________
Forgiveness is not limited to those who change. ________________________________

Read and memorize 1 John 1:9: "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."

More from the Girlfriends
God is the One who heals. Forgiveness puts us in the correct posture for Him to do so.  Don't wait another minute to deal with the issue of forgiveness in your life. Know that we are praying for you and standing with you as you choose forgiveness.

Be sure to check out the FREE MP3son Mary's website.

Need help dealing with the sin and temptation you encounter in your life? Get Mary's E-Bible Study, Winning the War with Temptationfor practical and powerful steps you can take to live a life of victory. .

Need help getting the Word of God into your life?Check out Mary's Weekly Online Bible Study, When I Am Afraid, to learn how to face, deal with and surrender your fears to God.

Are you ready to begin a new faith adventure?Get a copy of our new book, Trusting God.

[Judy Harder]

February 3, 2012
Learning To Breathe
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
Discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness (1 Timothy 4:7b, NASB).

Friend to Friend
Before our first child was born, my husband and I took a series of classes to prepare us for childbirth. I vividly remember being told by my Lamaze instructor that while in labor, I would need to breathe through each contraction. She would give us instructions like: "Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth" and "When you inhale, allow your belly to expand first, then your chest." She told us that the way we breathe would affect the way we would experience labor.

We spent a lot of time during those week-after-week classes learning how to breathe in a whole new way. We were taught that the breaths we would take during labor would need to be purposed and controlled. They required discipline and were not like natural breathing. So I practiced and I practiced the special breathing techniques in preparation for when the labor pains came a-knocking.

When the day arrived to welcome my firstborn son, Preston Miles Smith, into the world, I learned what a discipline breathing through contractions really is! There were times during labor that I felt like holding my breath instead of breathing. Times when the pain was so intense that my natural response was to scream instead of to breathe. Yes. This type of breathing was surely a learned behavior, a purposed discipline. And on the other side of this purposed discipline, in spite of all the pain endured, I was blessed to experience the wonderful joy of life.

I've labored through many hard life experiences since my child birthing days. I'm sure you have too. There are times when circumstances press us in waves, contractions of life that are seemingly endless. When the waves of trials hit our heart and home, the spiritual discipline of trusting God helps us to breathe through the squeeze of each pressure. I like to call it faith-breathing. When we hunker down and put into practice the act – the discipline – of faith.

But what do we mean by "the discipline of faith"?Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever(1 Corinthians 9:24-25).Just like I learned to breathe in preparation for going through labor pains, Christians learn to breathe through life pains when we implement spiritual disciplines in our lives like prayer, fasting, journaling and Scripture reading. They are purposed disciplines that bring joy and strength. The more we pray, the more we grow in intimacy with God. The more we read and know the Bible, the more we understand God's will and character. We see over and over again that He is good, faithful, compassionate, loving, gentle, just, holy, righteous and trustworthy in all things. We are encouraged and spurred on by the faith of others. We learn to faith-breathe!         

The flames of fire have heated up and refined my faith on many occasions! Life is filled with challenges. God is always with us and will help us breathe through the difficult situations we face. He allows us to go through trials as a part of our refining process. Struggles send us running to God for help, for faith, for strength, for protection and direction. They are often pregnant with pain. Bursting with heartache. If we yield them to God, He uses to rid our lives of trust-barriers like fear and doubt, and to bring glory and honor to him. There are many life contractions that hurt us, but there is no earthly pain that can diminish the hope of our salvation. We must simply breath – continue practicing those spiritual disciplines that bind us to the heart of God.

Yes, and everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. But you must remain faithful to the things you have been taught. You know they are true, for you know you can trust those who taught you. You have been taught the holy Scriptures from childhood, and they have given you the wisdom to receive the salvation that comes by trusting in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work(2 Timothy 3:12, 14-17, NLT).

Trusting God takes discipline. We don't always feel like it. It's not always what we want to do. It's not natural. At times we feel overwhelmed and want to soul-scream. If we always acted on our feelings, our lives would be chaotic messes. As in childbirth, there finally comes the time of deliverance where what is birthed forth to joy is directly the result of the very pain we have gone through.

Let's Pray
Dear Father, please teach me to breath! Strengthen me through life's hard labor experiences and help me to practice the disciplines I have learned through your Scriptures. When I feel like screaming through the pain, help me to breath by reading and memorizing your Word, fasting and praying, and meditating on your Truth. Thank you for the strength you will give me as I trust in You.

In Jesus' Name I pray,

Amen.

Now it's Your Turn
Read over the verses below and write them on note card and review them until they are committed to memory.

"...all things are possible with God" (Mark 10:27b).

"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13).

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." (Psalm 119:11)

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you" (Philippians 4:8-9).

How did today's devotion connect with your heart? How were you challenged personally? Let's talk about it on my Facebook page! Meet me at www.Facebook.com/GwenSmithMusic.

More from the Girlfriends
One of the ways we can learn to faith-breathe is to fix our hearts and minds Godward throughout each day. Music can help us do that. Gwen's new CD, Uncluttered is purposed to sweep you away from life-noise and to focus your heart and mind on the one thing that matters: your relationship with Jesus Christ. Uncluttered is now available on iTunes, Amazonor on Gwen's website: www.GwenSmith.net.

Today's devotion is an excerpt from Girlfriends in God's new 12-week devotion book, Trusting God. This is the perfect book for individual study or to work through with a group of friends. With impactful devotions, study questions, journal pages, free on-line video intros, and an index of trust-building Scriptures... this book has everything! Join the faith adventure here: www.GirlfriendsinGod.com/TrustingGod.

[Judy Harder]

February 6, 2012
God Can Resurrect Your Marriage From the Ashes Part 1
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"Then he [God] said to me [Ezekiel], "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD!' This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life.  Then you will know that I am the LORD,'" (Ezekiel 37:4-6 NIV).

Friend to Friend
It was January 7, 2005 when a group of friends gathered at Don and Jona's house to watch the Dr. Phil show. Jona had written in to a contest that Good Housekeeping, in conjunction with Dr. Phil, had on "life change." Of fifteen thousand applicants, Jona was the grand prize winner! As the winner, Don and Jona were guests on the Dr. Phil Show to tell their story. But I didn't need Dr. Phil to tell me the story, I lived it with them. Let Jona and I share how we remember it ...

Don was twenty-seven-years old when Jona first met him on a spring church beach retreat.  Immediately, she knew he was exactly what she had always dreamed of in a husband. Don had a strong faith in God, a good job, a college degree, drive, and dreams for the future. He was physically fit, witty, adventurous, sexy, and "just plain gorgeous." On top of that, he was constantly surrounded by women at the retreat that were vying for his attention.

When they returned home, Jona could hardly believe her good fortune when Don asked her to dinner. Don and Jona dated only three months before he asked her to marry him, and on March 30, 1985, before the next spring beach retreat, they were husband and wife.

Their first year of marriage was a blissful blur of candlelight dinners, spontaneous lovemaking, and endless conversation. The icing on the one-year anniversary cake was the purchase of their first home. By their second anniversary, Don quit his job to start his own business. Life was clicking along at a steady pace toward acquiring the American Dream. By their fourth anniversary, Jona had their first child and joined the ranks of "stay-at-home-mom." But, after twenty-four months of Don's new business venture, the couple faced a second mortgage, a dwindling bank account, and a looming cloud of debt. Jona was forced to go back to work and seeds of discontentment, disrespect, and disenchantment began to take root.

"I was so mad at Don for the mistakes I felt he had made," Jona explained. "Deep down, I wanted him to be God and to fulfill all my needs. He made a poor God. When my mother died in 1993, I sank into a clinical depression. I spent most of my time at home in bed. And even though I had two children by this time, I withdrew from being a mom, as well as being a wife. I then began to eat...and eat.  I went from 140 pounds to 240 pounds."

"Don and I had the perfect engagement, a beautiful wedding, and a fantasy honeymoon. But when the obstacles came along, I wasn't prepared to maneuver over, around, or through them.  I thought, this is not the way the story goes. What happened to the fairy tale?"

"Don changed jobs about every other year, however, he always provided for our needs. It just drove me crazy that he couldn't stay put."

"I remember one day Don said, 'Why are you eating and gaining all this weight?' I shot back, 'I'm doing this because I don't want you to touch me. Besides, I can lose the weight if I want to, but you'll always be a loser.' Little by little, word by word, angry look by angry look, rejection by rejection; I began the process of destroying my husband. Comments like 'You're so stupid,' 'duh,' and 'can't you do anything right?' were constantly spewing from my mouth. I was in pain and I wanted Don to be in pain too. One day, I made a list of all of Don's faults. He found the list, but I didn't even care."

Jona always thought that since Don was a Christian, he would never leave her. However, there came a point where he could not take the emotional turmoil any longer. On May 6, 2001, Don left. Jona had destroyed her marriage and her man. On January 31, 2003, the divorce was final.

"A couple of months after our divorce, I woke up to God's still small voice," Jona explained. "He seemed to say, 'Is this what you wanted? Did you want a divorce? Do you want Don to marry another woman and have your children torn between spending time in two different households? Do you want to be alone? Were you the wife I called you to be?'  Oh God," Jona cried, "What have I done?"

Now friends, the next part of the story is what Dr. Phil did not tell you. God began working on Jona's heart. She didn't change because of a self-help book or a ten step program, but because of the miraculous work of the Holy Spirit. Do you want to know what really happened? Do you want to know what Dr. Phil did not tell his viewers? Grab a cup of coffee and join me tomorrow for the rest of the story.

Let's Pray
Dear LORD, help me be the woman my husband needs for me to be. Help me to stop concentrating on his faults and failures, but start looking at my own. Show me. Teach me. Empower me.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
I know Today's Truth seems like a strange verse. It is! It is one of the strangest stories in the bible. Go back and read Ezekiel chapter 37. If God can do that with a bunch of dry bones, just think what He can do with your marriage! Your broken life! Your broken dreams!

Do you see yourself in Jona?

Is God telling you there is something you need to do differently in your marriage? In your relationships?

Let's chat, visit www.facebook.com/sharonjaynesand tell me how one little change has made a difference in one of your relationships.

More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was taken from Sharon's book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams: Seven Qualities Every Man Longs For.Sharon interviewed hundreds of men to see what they really wanted in the woman of their dreams, and their answers are there for you to see!  If you would like to have a husband who is sorry to leave home in the morning and eager to return, then this book is for you! And if you know someone who is struggling in her marriage, this would be a great gift.

[Judy Harder]

February 6, 2012
God Can Resurrect Your Marriage From the Ashes Part 1
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"Then he [God] said to me [Ezekiel], "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD!' This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life.  Then you will know that I am the LORD,'" (Ezekiel 37:4-6 NIV).

Friend to Friend
It was January 7, 2005 when a group of friends gathered at Don and Jona's house to watch the Dr. Phil show. Jona had written in to a contest that Good Housekeeping, in conjunction with Dr. Phil, had on "life change." Of fifteen thousand applicants, Jona was the grand prize winner! As the winner, Don and Jona were guests on the Dr. Phil Show to tell their story. But I didn't need Dr. Phil to tell me the story, I lived it with them. Let Jona and I share how we remember it ...

Don was twenty-seven-years old when Jona first met him on a spring church beach retreat.  Immediately, she knew he was exactly what she had always dreamed of in a husband. Don had a strong faith in God, a good job, a college degree, drive, and dreams for the future. He was physically fit, witty, adventurous, sexy, and "just plain gorgeous." On top of that, he was constantly surrounded by women at the retreat that were vying for his attention.

When they returned home, Jona could hardly believe her good fortune when Don asked her to dinner. Don and Jona dated only three months before he asked her to marry him, and on March 30, 1985, before the next spring beach retreat, they were husband and wife.

Their first year of marriage was a blissful blur of candlelight dinners, spontaneous lovemaking, and endless conversation. The icing on the one-year anniversary cake was the purchase of their first home. By their second anniversary, Don quit his job to start his own business. Life was clicking along at a steady pace toward acquiring the American Dream. By their fourth anniversary, Jona had their first child and joined the ranks of "stay-at-home-mom." But, after twenty-four months of Don's new business venture, the couple faced a second mortgage, a dwindling bank account, and a looming cloud of debt. Jona was forced to go back to work and seeds of discontentment, disrespect, and disenchantment began to take root.

"I was so mad at Don for the mistakes I felt he had made," Jona explained. "Deep down, I wanted him to be God and to fulfill all my needs. He made a poor God. When my mother died in 1993, I sank into a clinical depression. I spent most of my time at home in bed. And even though I had two children by this time, I withdrew from being a mom, as well as being a wife. I then began to eat...and eat.  I went from 140 pounds to 240 pounds."

"Don and I had the perfect engagement, a beautiful wedding, and a fantasy honeymoon. But when the obstacles came along, I wasn't prepared to maneuver over, around, or through them.  I thought, this is not the way the story goes. What happened to the fairy tale?"

"Don changed jobs about every other year, however, he always provided for our needs. It just drove me crazy that he couldn't stay put."

"I remember one day Don said, 'Why are you eating and gaining all this weight?' I shot back, 'I'm doing this because I don't want you to touch me. Besides, I can lose the weight if I want to, but you'll always be a loser.' Little by little, word by word, angry look by angry look, rejection by rejection; I began the process of destroying my husband. Comments like 'You're so stupid,' 'duh,' and 'can't you do anything right?' were constantly spewing from my mouth. I was in pain and I wanted Don to be in pain too. One day, I made a list of all of Don's faults. He found the list, but I didn't even care."

Jona always thought that since Don was a Christian, he would never leave her. However, there came a point where he could not take the emotional turmoil any longer. On May 6, 2001, Don left. Jona had destroyed her marriage and her man. On January 31, 2003, the divorce was final.

"A couple of months after our divorce, I woke up to God's still small voice," Jona explained. "He seemed to say, 'Is this what you wanted? Did you want a divorce? Do you want Don to marry another woman and have your children torn between spending time in two different households? Do you want to be alone? Were you the wife I called you to be?'  Oh God," Jona cried, "What have I done?"

Now friends, the next part of the story is what Dr. Phil did not tell you. God began working on Jona's heart. She didn't change because of a self-help book or a ten step program, but because of the miraculous work of the Holy Spirit. Do you want to know what really happened? Do you want to know what Dr. Phil did not tell his viewers? Grab a cup of coffee and join me tomorrow for the rest of the story.

Let's Pray
Dear LORD, help me be the woman my husband needs for me to be. Help me to stop concentrating on his faults and failures, but start looking at my own. Show me. Teach me. Empower me.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
I know Today's Truth seems like a strange verse. It is! It is one of the strangest stories in the bible. Go back and read Ezekiel chapter 37. If God can do that with a bunch of dry bones, just think what He can do with your marriage! Your broken life! Your broken dreams!

Do you see yourself in Jona?

Is God telling you there is something you need to do differently in your marriage? In your relationships?

Let's chat, visit www.facebook.com/sharonjaynesand tell me how one little change has made a difference in one of your relationships.

More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was taken from Sharon's book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams: Seven Qualities Every Man Longs For.Sharon interviewed hundreds of men to see what they really wanted in the woman of their dreams, and their answers are there for you to see!  If you would like to have a husband who is sorry to leave home in the morning and eager to return, then this book is for you! And if you know someone who is struggling in her marriage, this would be a great gift.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.


Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com

[Judy Harder]

February 7, 2012
God Can Resurrect Your Marriage from the Ashes Part 2
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"So I prophesied as he [God] commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet-a vast army," (Ezekiel 37:10 NIV).

Friend to Friend
I can hardly wait for you to read the rest of the story from yesterday. If you missed it, please go back and read it first. Here's where we left off...Don and Jona were divorced.

Now friends, the next part of the story is what Dr. Phil did not tell you. God began working on Jona's heart. She didn't change because of a self-help book or a ten step program, but because of the miraculous work of the Holy Spirit. Do you want to know what really happened? Do you want to know what Dr. Phil did not tell his viewers? Grab a cup of coffee and keep reading.

God took Jona to a place of repentance and began to soften, remold and remake her very heart. That's what God does. He doesn't try to cover up our flaws; He starts from scratch and makes us new. While the divorce was final, God was only just beginning to work on Jona's heart.

"God took me to a place of repentance," Jona explained. "For the first time, through a support group, I saw clearly what I had done to destroy my marriage. I had always blamed our problems on Don changing jobs so often, but the real problem was my lack of respect for the God appointed leader of my home. I was the real problem and Don simply couldn't take it anymore. I had rejected Don with my words, my appearance, and my withdrawal of physical touch."

Whether or not God could salvage the marriage, Jona made a commitment that she would allow God to salvage her.

Jona's heart longed to be reunited to Don, but her ultimate goal was to become the woman God wanted her to be. She immersed herself in Bible study and prayer, and began to take an interest in her appearance. Interesting, as the pounds began to drop, so did the scales that had covered her eyes.

"I began to understand what God's Word said about the relationship between a husband and wife. I was not Don's Holy Spirit. I was not the leader of my home. God had called me to respect Don as the leader, to honor him as a child of God, and to love him with my all. One day when Don came to pick up our two boys, I shared with him what I had been learning."

"I told Don that I knew that we were divorced, but I was making a commitment to submit to him. I didn't when we were married, but I did from that time forward."

"That's fine," he told me. "But you need to know I'm moving on with my life."

"You can move on," I said, "But I'm staying right here."

Jona continued to encourage Don and give him her BEST.

"BEST stands for bless, edify, share, and touch," she explained. "I began to touch him when he came by the house. I'd pat his back or give him a quick hug. When I knew he was coming, I'd put on a nice dress and fix my hair. I'd tell him I was proud of how he was handling the boys and share with him what God was teaching me. Some people told him I was trying to trick him and that he should ignore me. But it wasn't a trick. God had changed my heart and I was committed, no matter what happened between us in the future, to never go back to being that bitter woman I had been before."

"Sharon, I hate to tell you this," she said, "but for the first time, I prayed for Don. I had never prayed for him before, but now I pray for him all the time."

Jona lost the added pounds and gained a beautiful glowing countenance. It was amazing. More than the change in her physical appearance, the glow of Jesus Christ shone through her radiant face.

Don was confused at times and a bit leery of the change. "Why do you think I'm wonderful, all of a sudden?" he asked her.

"Because now I see you through God's eyes," she explained. "I see that you are a wonderful man."

Don fell in love with Jona all over again. No, it wasn't a trick – it was a miracle. God has given them a second chance. They were remarried on August 24, 2003. Oh how I love God ... He is the God of second chances.

Dear friends, Jona has so graciously allowed me to tell you her story because she has decided that she will do anything to help one woman not make the same mistakes she has made. She cried and cried all through the recounting of the story, and relived the pain...for you. "God allowed me to go to a terrible place," Jona explained. "My prayer is that others will not have to go to that place before they wake up and realize what they are doing to their men."

And that...is what Dr. Phil did not tell you.

Let's Pray
Dear LORD, help me be the woman my husband needs for me to be. Help me to stop concentrating on his faults and failures, but start looking at my own. Show me. Teach me. Empower me.  In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Is God telling you there is something you need to do differently in your marriage? Is there something you need to do differently in other important relationships in your life?

You know, Jona did not destroy her marriage by herself. Don made his fair share of mistakes too.  But here's the thing – we cannot change another person. We can only change ourselves. And sometimes...that is enough.

Consider giving your BEST to others. Write out the acronym and keep it in a prominent place.

BLESS
EDIFY
SHARE
TOUCH

What has this two-part devotion stirred in your heart? I'd love to know. Let's chat at www.facebook.com/sharonjaynes.

More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was taken from Sharon's book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams: Seven Qualities Every Man Longs For.Sharon interviewed hundreds of men to see what they really wanted in the woman of their dreams, and their answers are there for you to see!  If you would like to have a husband who is sorry to leave home in the morning and eager to return, then this book is for you.