Girlfriends in God

[Judy Harder]

May 1, 2013
Equipped to Handle Life
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work," (2 Timothy 3:16-17, NIV).

Friend to Friend

When I worked in a medical office several years ago, we had what we called tray setups. On the trays were all the instruments we needed for various procedures. We prepared them ahead of time and stored them in a cabinet for later use.  When a patient came in for a certain procedure, we didn't have to scramble around to find what we needed. We simply walked to the cabinet and pulled out the prepared tray. Voila! We were ready to go!

That's how it is with Scripture memorization. When you have Scripture hidden in your heart, you can "pull out" the exact verse you need when you need it. Here are examples of some verses you might need in your "storage cabinet."

When you are afraid: For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.  2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV

When you are angry: A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1 NIV

When you are confused: I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with My eye upon you. Psalm 32:8 NASB

When you are frustrated: Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will be established. Proverbs 16:3 NASB

When someone hurts you: Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32 NASB

When you are lonely: Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you. Hebrews 13:5 NIV

When times are hard: For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison. 2 Corinthians 4:17 NASB

When you want to give up: I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 NASB

When you are worried: Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6 NASB

When you mess up big time: One thing I do, forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14 NASB

When you have a need: And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 NASB

These are just a smattering of verses that will equip you to handle what life brings your way. Some are from the New American Standard Version and some are from the New International Version.

I encourage you to print out this list, add to this list, and memorize the list. Then when the time comes, you won't have to scramble for what you need. It'll be right on the tip of your tongue and in the storage cabinet of your heart.

Let's Pray

Dear God, thank You that you have given us every thing we need to live a life of godliness and the truth. Help me to commit Your Word to memory. And remind me of those truths when I need them most.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

More from the Girlfriends

How do you defeat the enemy when he is pestering you with lies – lies that cause you to fear, doubt, and worry? You defeat him with the truth! When it comes to Satan, you don't have to out muscle him, out shoot him, or out smart him. You just have to out truth him. If you would like to learn more about how to win the war over your thought life and stand solidly in the truth, then check out my book,  I'm Not Good Enough and Other Lies Women Tell Themselves. You'll learn how to realize the enemy's true identity, recognize the lies, reject the lies, and replace the lies with truth.

[Judy Harder]

May 2, 2013
Idols and Tools
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

Jesus said to them, "Be careful and guard against all kinds of greed. Life is not measured by how much one owns" (Luke 12:15, ICB).

Friend to Friend

We live in a "stuff" driven world where it does not seem to matter how much we have, because it is never enough. We are told the more things we have, the more successful we are. We not only want possessions, we want other people's talents, abilities, circumstances and relationships. Luke warns us to guard against "all kinds of greed." It is easy for us to covet a better job. We want the power that others seem to have. We are driven to have the best and to be the best, unable to relax and celebrate where we are and what we do have.  Hebrews 13:5 is a powerful and clear warning to "keep your lives free from the love of money, and be satisfied with what you have. God has said, 'I will never leave you; I will never forget you.'" Now that is a fortune!

Be hones. How important are your possessions? How do you view them? Howard Hendricks, a great Bible teacher, was having dinner with a very wealthy and prestigious man. Hendricks was amazed at the humility of his host, knowing the man's impressive credentials and the massive wealth he possessed. At the end of the evening, Hendricks asked his friend, "How did you grow up in such wealth and not be consumed by materialism?" With a smile, the man responded, "My parents taught me that everything in our home was either an idol or a tool. The choice was up to me." The truth is that we want whatever we put first in life. I have discovered the more I have to live for, the less I need to live on. Too often, greed and jealousy encourage wrong decisions and foster unhealthy and ungodly attitudes. The fact is that greed and jealousy are fruits of idolatry. Everything in life is either an idol we choose to worship or a tool we choose to use for good or bad.

Corrie ten Boom was a godly woman who endured great persecution from the Nazis in the World War II concentration camp known as Ravensbruck. During an interview, she once stated she had learned to hold everything "loosely" in her hands. When asked why, Miss ten Boom explained that after being a Christian for many years, she had discovered the truth that when she grasped things tightly, it hurt more when the Lord had to pry her fingers loose. The choice really is ours to make. We need to hold our "stuff" loosely while investing financial resources in eternal things. We need to keep our gaze riveted to God's plan alone instead of entering the all too familiar and ungodly "competition" that seems to plague so many people.   

To stay away from idols and avoid greed, we need to change our focus from what we want to what we have, and choose to be satisfied with whatever that is. In Luke 12:15, Jesus issues a warning, "Be careful and guard against all kinds of greed. Life is not measured by how much one owns" (ICB). I believe that attaching importance to "things" is sin and will lead to more sin.

I love the story of a wealthy man who prayed, asking for permission to take his earthly wealth with him when he died and went to heaven. An angel appeared to the man and said, "We heard your prayer, but I am sorry. You simply cannot take it with you." The man pleaded so passionately that the angel said, "Let me see what I can do." When the angel returned, he reported, "Good news! God has made an exception for you. You may bring one suitcase with you when it is your time to go." Delighted, the man packed his one suitcase and went on with life. Several years later, he died and appeared at the Pearly Gates where he was met by St. Peter who took one look at the suitcase and said, "I am sorry, sir, but you cannot bring that in with you." The man protested, "But I received special permission." Just then, the angel appeared and said, "Peter, it is true. He has special permission to bring one suitcase in with him." Curious, Peter said, "Do you mind showing me what is in the bag that is so important to you?" With a smile, the man replied, "Not at all" and proceeded to open the suitcase to reveal stacks of gold bricks. Peter's face said it all, "Pavement? You brought pavement with you?"

Many of us are in a never-ending and futile quest to accumulate "pavement" here that is totally worthless there!  Wealth – financial or is all a matter of perspective. We need to understand that our Father wants us to have wealth. We just have to be careful not to settle for earthly money, possessions, human power and prestige instead of the eternal treasures only He can offer.

Let's Pray

Father, please forgive me when I value things over people and my relationship with You. Thank You for meeting every need in my life. I now surrender all of my worldly goods to Your control. Help me to become a generous and joyful giver and use me to meet the needs of others so that You will be honored and glorified.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Carefully consider and answer the following questions. Record your answers in your journal.

How important are your possessions to you? Be honest. 
Make a list of your ten most important "things." Will they be just as important in a year?
Examine your heart for any jealousy. What steps do you need to take in order to eliminate that jealousy?
Choose to give away a prized possession. What emotions did you have to deal with in making that choice?
Identify and eliminate any "pockets" of jealousy and greed in your heart.
Begin each day with a prayer of thanksgiving. Evaluate the difference this daily prayer has made in a month.
More from the Girlfriends

Many of us have become accustomed to "living on the edge" of financial security. Guard your heart, girlfriend!  Keep your gaze on God and the plan to which he has called you. Don't focus on the world and the empty promises of fame and power it offers. Cultivate a grateful heart. Pray for the discernment to embrace those hidden treasures buried in every trial. Praise God for His sufficiency in meeting your every need, even if the way he meets it does not correspond with yours. Trust God – and be thankful. 

Mary's book, Escaping the Stress Trap, offers a step-by-step plan for finding contentment in God alone – not in the things of this world. Looking for a practical and powerful Bible study for your daily quiet time or small group study? Check out Mary's weekly Online Bible Study, Power Up With Proverbs. Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

[Judy Harder]

May 3, 2013
Super Mom is a Fairy Tale
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do no grow weary, (Galatians 6:9, NIV).

Friend to Friend

Don't you just detest those mothers who seem to have it all together? You know her: super-mom. She is that mythical creature who never yells at her kids. Whose house is always spotless, whose children always obey quickly and quietly, who prepares three meals a day that are nutritious and aesthetically pleasing...the one who is a "successful" mother.

If there is anything that can discourage a hard working mom, it is comparing herself to this creature, which only exists in storybooks. If we think someone is a super-mom, most likely her cape is ripped, her tights are tattered, and her special powers to get her kids to act right got lost in a cluttered closet somewhere. I can assure you that every mother who appears to breeze effortlessly through life has struggles of her own.

When I taught my husband to snow ski, I showed him how to turn his skis toward the side of the mountain to slow down. Inevitably he turned too much to the left or right and ended up with his skis pointing up the mountain. He then proceeded to slide down the mountain backwards. After a few trials and lots of error, he discovered that when he turned, if he just continued turning his skis, making a complete circle, it would slow him down and he wouldn't end up going down hill backwards.

It was a sight to behold, but it worked. At the end of the day, a woman came up to Steve and asked if he could show her how to make those "beautiful circles." Of course he obliged. She thought he was an expert skier who was doing some form of acrobatics. In actuality, he was going in circles, doing whatever it took to keep from going down hill, backwards.

When you look around and see other mothers who appear to be "mothering" better than you, don't be fooled. They are probably doing whatever it takes not to go downhill backwards.

Successful mothers are not the ones who have never struggled. They are the ones who never give up, despite the struggles.

Calvin Coolidge said, "Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan, "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race."

I'd like to add that God is the only One Who is Omnipotent, but persistence and determination while relying on His power brings great results!

Galatians 6:9 reminds us, "Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we shall reap if we do no grow weary." That's a promise that we all can cling to.

Let's Pray

Dear God, sometimes I feel like I am going in circles. Help me not compare myself to other moms who seem to be "doing it better," but to keep my eyes on You. I pray that You will help me be the best mom I can be to the children You have given me.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Since May is the month of Mother's Day, let's pray for the moms in our GiG Family. Please log onto www.sharonjaynes.com, give your name and state in the comment box (or country if out of the US), and pray for the name ahead and behind yours. I'll pray for the first mom.

More from the Girlfriends

Being a great mom reminds me of the story of a world famous violinist. An admiring fan ran up to him one day and cried, "Mr. Kreisler, I'd give my life to play as you do!" To that he replied, "Madam, I did." Being a great mom is a diligent investment of sacrifices that reaps dividends with compounded interest over time. If you'd like to sharpen your parenting skills, check out my book, Being a Great Mom-Raising Great Kids. It is a storehouse of encouragement for one of the most important jobs on earth.

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Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
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[Judy Harder]

May 6, 2013
How to Avoid Jealousy
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones (Proverbs 14:30, NIV).

Friend to Friend

We all know what it is like to be green with envy. We all struggle with jealousy at some point in life. Let's be honest. How often do we look at another person and covet what we perceive to be their success? How many of us are not content to serve God with the gifts He has given us while whining about the fact that others have the gifts we want. We convince ourselves that our longing for a bigger platform is to further the Kingdom when, in reality, that longing is for self-promotion, fame and recognition. Ugly, isn't it? Jealousy is one of the most dangerous emotions because it is one of the most destructive.

"Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood, but who can survive the destructiveness of jealousy?" (Proverbs 27:4).

"Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such wisdom does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice" (James 3:13-16).

James asks, "Who is wise and understanding among you?" The word "wise" describes one with moral insight and/or skill in the practical issues of life. The word "understanding" means "intellectual perception." James asks these pointed questions and then calls for a spiritual "Show and Tell" when he says, "Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom."

James is sending us a strong message that wisdom and understanding are not measured by degrees, but by deeds. In other words, it is not how much we know that counts, but how much we are living that matters. We can talk a great spiritual game, but if we have a jealous heart, if we harbor envy, allowing it to creep into our lives and ministries, taking up residence, then we have no wisdom and are living a lie.

James defines jealousy as "bitter envy and selfish ambition" (James 3:14). "Bitter envy" literally means, "a nasty jealousy" while "selfish ambition" refers to "a contentious selfishness" or "a hostile ego." "Selfish ambition" can also be translated as a "party spirit," and was a term used by the Greeks to describe a dishonest politician who works the crowd, using every opportunity and every possible method to draw attention to himself in an effort to win votes. James is painting an ugly picture of jealousy.

I read about a fisherman who loved to catch crabs. After many years of experience, he learned that he never needed a top for his crab basket. If one of the crabs starts to climb up the sides of the basket, the others will reach up and pull it back down. What a perfect picture of jealousy! A jealous person tears others down in order to promote himself. And isn't our world filled with people who do that?

"You are still not spiritual. You have jealousy and arguing among you. This shows that you are not spiritual. You are acting like people of the world" (1 Corinthians 3:3). 

People of the world secretly cheer when their enemy fails.

People of the world are driven by ego.

People of the world want what everyone else has.

People of the world are suspicious of everyone, trusting no one.

People of the world resent the success of others.

People of the world are taught by envy and jealousy to take care of self above all others.

John and Dave were hiking when they spotted a mountain lion staring at them. John froze in his tracks but Dave sat down on a log, tore off his hiking boots, pulled a pair of running shoes from his backpack and quickly put them on. John looked at him in amazement! "You can't outrun a mountain lion!" he said. Dave shrugged and responded, "I don't have to! I just have to outrun you!" I am so glad that God's people are not like that, aren't you? Actually, Paul is writing to God's people, warning them that jealousy is deadly to the unity of the church. Jealousy springs from a heart of insecurity and bubbles out in self-centered actions, arrogant words and divisive attitudes. We must realize that jealousy and envy are in direct opposition to the very nature of Jesus Christ and as a result, produce ungodly results such as:

Pride
Jealousy triggers the release of a false pride. I read the story of a proud woodpecker that was tapping away at a dead tree when the sky unexpectedly turned black and the thunder began to roll. The woodpecker went right on working. Suddenly a bolt of lightning struck the old tree, splintering it into hundreds of pieces. Startled but unhurt, the haughty bird flew off, screeching to his feathered friends, "Hey, everyone, look what I did! Look what I did!" The jealous man must be first in everything. He cannot stand to see anyone except himself in the limelight. Pride is driven to boast. Pride is self-worship.

Denial
Few jealous people realize that they are jealous, and even if they did, would deny it. Jealousy always opposes truth because truth always exposes jealousy. In James 3:13-16  James describes a destructive sequence that is initiated by envy and jealousy. First, selfish ambition leads to a party spirit, a spirit of rivalry. In order to "win the election," we must resort to boasting, which usually involves lies.  When jealousy is present in our hearts, we oppose truth and our very life becomes a lie.

Chaos
James 3:16 explains that where there is "envy and selfish ambition," there is disorder. A world dominated by jealousy is a world in chaos. "Disorder" literally means "insurrection" and portrays the idea of an angry mob. In other words, when jealousy fills the heart, the life will be in chaos. Priorities are wrong. Focus is misplaced; contentment vanishes while joy and peace disappear. We become inward and our hearts unhealthy. Jealousy is simply not good for you.

Sinful habits
James 3:16 explains that jealousy not only creates disorder and chaos, it invites "every evil practice" to take up residence in our lives. Jealousy gives the enemy a foothold, a command post from which he oversees the building of sinful habits. "Evil" literally means "worthless" or "of no account." Jealousy consumes our lives with the pursuit of worthless things that do not matter.

Ecclesiastes 4:4 "All labor and all achievement that spring from man's envy of his neighbor...is meaningless, a chasing after the wind."

Jealousy is a spiritual cancer that will invade and destroy whatever it touches. Everything we do from the motive of jealousy is empty and does not count in Kingdom work. We need to brutally and honestly examine every heart motive, and choose against anything or anyone who promotes jealousy and envy.

Let's Pray

Lord, forgive me for allowing jealousy to be present in my life. I confess it to you as sin. Please strengthen me and help me guard my heart against any kind of envy. I love You, Father. You are all I need. Teach me to walk in Your ways and fill my heart with Your love and kindness.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Are any of the following characteristics or behaviors present in your life? If so, can you identify its source? What steps do you need to take in order to find victory in each area? Record your answers in your journal.

Pride _________________________________________________
 
Denial ________________________________________________
 
Chaos ________________________________________________
 
Sinful habits____________________________________________
More from the Girlfriends

Do you need help learning how to withstand temptation? Get Mary's E-Book Bible Study, Winning the War With Temptation. Looking for a practical and powerful Bible study for your daily quiet time or small group study? Check out Mary's weekly Online Bible Study, Power Up With Proverbs. Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

[Judy Harder]

May 7, 2013
Trusting God to Answer Your Prayers
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be given you, (John 15:7, NIV).

Friend to Friend

I am blessed with some very special nieces and nephews. One of my favorite people in the world is my niece, Grace Anne. After college, Grace Anne served two years with a mission organization, teaching Physical Education in the Dominican Republic. Those two years were very different and difficult for Gracie. She didn't have the luxury of hot showers, fast food, or texting. Her apartment was sparse, her friends were few, and her trips to the mall were non-existent.

But while Grace Anne didn't have the luxuries and modern conveniences that we so take for granted, she did have the indulgence of a quieter life, a beautiful mountainous vista, and an increased proclivity to hearing God's voice without the carnal clattering of our fast-paced society.

One day, Grace Anne e-mailed me about what God was teaching her. Let me share these wise words from one so young.

Hi Aunt Sharon,

I hope your Monday morning is going well so far! I haven't started having class yet, so I thought that I would share with you something I have been reminded of lately.

I was reading Streams in the Desert the other day and read the scripture from Genesis 24:15  26-27  "Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder...Then the man bowed down and worshiped the Lord, saying, 'Praise be to the Lord ... who has not abandoned his kindness and faithfulness.'"

I couldn't remember the whole story from that scripture so I looked it up and was reminded of the great story of Abraham's servant being obedient and putting his faith in God to provide a wife for Isaac.

Before the servant was even finished praying his request to God, God answered the prayer! I was reminded, "When we ask in faith and in Christ's name--that is, in oneness with Him and His will--it will be given you," (John 15:7). Since God's Word cannot fail, whenever we meet these simple conditions, the answer to our prayer has already been granted and is complete in heaven as we pray, even though it may not be revealed on earth until much later. When we believe God for a blessing, we must have an attitude of faith and begin to act and pray as if the blessing were already ours."

Reading this was such an encouraging reminder for me that when I make a request to God, I shouldn't pray and then say to myself, "I hope that gets taken care of," or "I hope it works out." I should have confidence that "even before I am finished making my request, the Lord has already answered it." I just need to wait patiently!

Well, I guess I needed to be reminded of it again, because this morning was touching on the same subject. The Scripture was, "Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this," (Psalm 37:5). The author of Streams in the Desert says, "The literal meaning of this verse is "Roll your way onto Jehovah and trust upon Him, and He works. This brings to our attention the immediacy of God's action once we commit, or 'roll' any burdens of any kind from our hands to His."

But if we don't commit and trust that when we roll it over to him it will be taken care of, He cannot do this. He goes on to say, "Our expectation that He will work is the very thing enabling the Holy Spirit to accomplish what we have 'rolled' onto Him.' At that point it is out of our grasp, and we are not to try to do it ourselves! HE WORKS! Take comfort from this and do not try to PICK IT UP AGAIN! What a relief it is knowing that He really is at work on our difficulty."

How many times I try to pick up that "thing" again once I have already prayed about it. Why in the world? I have no idea!

Psalm 57:2 says "I cry out to God Most High, to God, who fulfills his purpose for me." Another translation says, "He will perform the cause I hold in my hand." So the very thing "I hold in my hand," my classes today, preparing to come home in the summer, getting this new apartment, worrying about my finances, "this is what I can 'cry out' for Him to do 'for me', with the calm assurance He will perform it."

Oh how I love this girl. And how I love our LORD who is using her to teach the world, and her Aunt Sharon, to have a greater faith in God.

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, Help me to have faith to believe that even as I utter a prayer, You are in the process of answering. Thank you for caring about the smallest details of my life. Fulfill Your purpose in me, and give me the faith to be a willing vessel.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

As you read this devotion, did you see areas that you had not completely given to the Lord?

Do you tend to pray for God to take control, and yet continue to attempt to make things move along on your own?

When you pray, do you truly believe that God will answer? If not, what stands in your way of believing God?

Write ten on-going prayer requests that you have in your life. Now, beside each one write today's truth.

Now, click over to my blog page and say, "I rolled my burdens from my hands to His."

More from the Girlfriends

Rolling our burdens from our hands to God's hands is all about trust. And here's the thing, you don't have to understand all there is to know about God to trust Him! Mary, Gwen and I have written a 12-week devotional book titled Trusting God. We also have free videos to go along with each week on our website at www.girlfriendsinGod.com. This book is the perfect book to study with a friend or a group of friends. Check it out at www.sharonjaynes.com.

[Judy Harder]

May 8, 2013
Read the Directions
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11, NIV).

Friend to Friend

I am an average cook and a below average baker. Consequently, I am of little value in the "cookies from scratch" department. Our daughter, Danna, however, loves to bake and is very good at whipping up three-dozen cookies or her favorite yellow cake with chocolate frosting. I will never forget the day Danna baked her first batch of cookies from scratch.

It was a Saturday morning, and Danna had a "craving" for cookies. Not cookies in a package or from a store, but real cookies she insisted. Watching her gather all of the necessary ingredients, I asked which recipe she was planning to use. With a smug look of disdain, my competent daughter turned to her pitifully incompetent mother and explained that she didn't really need a recipe. After all, she had made hundreds of slice and bake cookies, not to mention the dozens of brownies from a box. How hard could it be? I decided to watch.

The kitchen counters quickly filled with various bowls, a tub of butter, flour, vanilla and milk. Tossing an occasional gracious and confident smile my way, Danna mixed differing amounts of each ingredient and stirred vigorously. Satisfied that it "looked right," she fished a cookie pan out of the cabinet, sprayed it with oil and began carefully spooning out the cookie dough. I was truly impressed. After setting the timer, she cleaned the kitchen, while waiting for the delicious results.

When the timer went off, Danna quickly pulled the cookies out of the oven, sliding them off the pan and onto a plate. They smelled good and looked good to me – but a skeptical frown met my encouraging words, warning of danger just ahead. Pinching off a bite, Danna popped the cookie into her mouth. Now keep in mind that my daughter does have a flair for the dramatic, but I was totally unprepared for the culinary eruption that followed.  Bits of cookie sprayed the kitchen counter and appliances as Danna coughed, choked, and strangled her way to the announcement that those cookies were "disgusting." Grabbing the plate, she deposited her project in the garbage, and fished the cookie recipe out of a kitchen drawer, studying the magic formula. When I asked what went wrong, she explained through a sheepish grin, "I thought I knew how to make cookies on my own. So I didn't read the recipe and left out the eggs." One of the qualities I most admire in Danna is her persistence, which compelled her to begin again. The second time around, following the recipe resulted in scrumptious results. God's plan is much the same.

God's has a unique plan or "recipe" for each one of us. God reveals His plan through the Bible. It is the instruction book of life, the blueprint for life construction, and the road map for the journey. When we saturate our lives with God's Word, it will naturally lead us and guide us according to His plan. Our greatest opportunity for success is to live that plan. God tucks into our very soul a discontentment with anything but His life "recipe."  If we approach each day searching for His handprints in every situation, choosing to walk in obedience to His Word, we will surely find ourselves smack dab in the middle of God's amazing purpose and plan.

The awesome truth is that more than we want to know His plan for our life, He wants us to know it and stands ready to guide us to and through that plan. The more time we spend with the Plan Maker, and the more we choose to obey His plan, the clearer that plan grows. God always reveals His plan to an obedient heart. Just as surely as Danna left the eggs out of her first effort, we leave Him out of our plans, and go our own foolish way.  Still, He waits. When the results are disastrous and we have made a mess of it all, He stands ready to begin again. We could save ourselves a lot of pain and futility if we simply read and follow the right set of directions.

Let's Pray

Father, I want to thank You for loving me and for creating me in response to a great plan for my life. Forgive me when I try to do things in my own strength and in my own way. Help me learn to seek and walk in Your ways. I embrace Your plans and lay down my own.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read and memorize Jeremiah 29:11. Record it in your journal.

Look back over your life. Examine the times when you followed God's plan. What were the results? Examine the times when you followed your own agenda. What were the results?

Read the following verses of Scripture and answer the questions listed below.

Ephesians 2:10"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."

How does this verse of Scripture emphasize the fact that you and I were created in response to God's plan, not as an afterthought or as an accident?
Psalm 8:3-5 "When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him? You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor."

How do these verses line up with the way you see yourself right now? What one immediate change do you need to make in order to see yourself the way God sees you?
Are you living a life plan that gives you hope and a future? Is it the right plan? 
Read and memorize Isaiah 43:4 and make it one of your life verses. "You are precious and honored in my sight, and I love you."

More from the Girlfriends

Are you searching for the peace that can only be found in God's perfect plan for your life? Get Mary's E-Book Bible Study, How to Find Your Missing Peace. Looking for a practical and powerful Bible study for your daily quiet time or small group study? Check out Mary's weekly Online Bible Study, Power Up With Proverbs.Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

[Judy Harder]

May 9, 2013
Everything is Possible for Her who Believes
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

Everything is possible for him who believes, (Mark 9:23 NIV).

Friend to Friend

Once, a distraught father had an unruly son with multiple physical and emotional problems. Many people even said the boy was possessed by a demon. The dad had tried everything, but the boy continued to demonstrate anti-social behavior: throwing himself in the fire and then in water. That sort of behavior, on top of frequent seizures, rolling on the ground, foaming at the mouth, and an inability to talk, made the dad desperate to find a solution. He even took the boy to some faith healers who were traveling through his hometown. But nothing seemed to work.

Finally, the dad realized no human being was going to be able to help his son, so he took him directly to God. The father heard that Jesus was visiting in his community, so he boldly brought the boy to Him. With desperation in his voice the father pleaded, "If You can do anything, take pity on us and help us!"

And Jesus answered, "If You can! All things are possible to him who believes."

Immediately the boy's father cried out, "I do believe: help my unbelief."

With that profession, Jesus healed the man's son.

Oh how this story from Mark 9 stirs my heart. Can't you feel the father's pain? How desperately he must have felt every time the child threw himself into the water or the fire.  "Why, Son? Why do you do these things? I don't understand," he must have asked.

Imagine the humiliation of the whispers as the family walked down the streets. "That's the Jones family. Have you heard about their son? He's...." The stares, the snickers, the off-color comments. Don't you know there were many days when this dad wanted to just give up? Instead, he offers us a beautiful picture of what all parents must do, the ultimate act in parenting - hand our children over to God.

As mothers, at time we find ourselves at the end of our mental and emotional resources. We feel we have done everything humanly possible and don't know the best action to take with our children. That's exactly where God wants us every day: not depending on our human wisdom but on His unfathomable omniscience, not depending on our own strength but on His unlimited power. When we realize that we do not and never will have all the child-rearing answers and solutions, we discover the importance of giving our children to God.

S.D. Gordon, inQuiet Talks on Prayer, said, "You can do more than pray, after you have prayed. But you cannot do more than pray until you have prayed."

In my Bible, I keep a 4 x 6 laminated card with prayers for Steven that I have prayed for 29 years. (Yes, he is that old. Mercy!) You, too, can pray that your children will:

Know Christ as Savior early in life. (Psalm 63:1, 2 Timothy 3:15)
Have a hatred for sin. (Psalm 97:10)
Be caught when guilty. (Psalm 119:71)
Be protected from the evil one in each area of their lives: spiritual, emotional, and physical. (John 17:15)
Have a responsible attitude in all their interpersonal relationships. (Daniel 6:3)
Respect those in authority over them. (Romans 13:1)
Desire the right kind of friends and be protected from the wrong friends. (Proverbs 1:10-11)
Be kept from the wrong mate and saved for the right one. (2 Corinthians 6:14-17)
Be kept pure until marriage (as well as the one they marry). (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)
Learn to totally submit to God and actively resist Satan in all things. (James 4:7)
Be single-hearted, willing to be sold out to Jesus Christ. (Romans 12:1-2)
Be hedged in so they cannot find their way to wrong people or wrong places and that the wrong people cannot find their way to them. (Hosea 2:6)
Let's Pray

(For those who have children still at home)

Dear God, today, I once again bring my child to you. Please show me how to parent this precious gift that you have given me. Help me to be the best mother that I can be. I pray that Your Holy Spirit will teach me, Your wisdom will guide me, and Your love will move me. Most of all, Lord, I give this child to You. Please make him (her) a servant after Your own heart.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

(For those with grown children)

Dear God,

My child is no longer under my roof or under my wing. He (She) is now out in the world making life decisions of his (her) own. I give this adult child to You, Lord. May he (she) seek You with all his (her) heart. I pray that You will protect him (her), guide him (her), and open his (her) heart to the truth of God's Word every day.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Make a list of things about your child over which you have no control.

Now turn that list into a prayer and relinquish each item of concern to God.

Remember Jesus' reply to the Father when He said, "If you can do anything..." Write today's key verse down and commit it to memory.

Click over to my blog page and tell me the names of your children. Then let's pray for each other's children. Pray for the ones above your entry. If you don't have children, list the name of 1-2 children that you pray for regularly (nieces, nephews, neighbors).

More from the Girlfriends:

Being a parent is the most difficult, rewarding responsibility that God has entrusted to us.  I am so glad that He doesn't leave us to figure it out all on our own, but gives us the Bible as the ultimate handbook. If you would like to discover seven key elements of great parenting, see Sharon's book, Being a Great Mom-Raising Great Kids.

[Judy Harder]

May 10, 2013
What is Your Pace?
Pam Farrel

Today's Truth

"Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win" (1 Corinthians 9:24).

Friend to Friend

Do you ever wonder if you are too busy as a couple, as a family – or if your plate is fuller than God might have intended for you as an individual? We each have our own God given life pace for which God has designed us. One pace is not right or wrong, because everyone has a pace at which he/she functions best. Bicycles have gears on them so you can find the right pace regardless of the terrain you are riding on, and in the verse above the writer references track and field races. A participant in a 100 yard dash will sprint to the finish, and a cross country runner, or marathoner will jog out a consistent, but not frenetic, pace. To win, they need to run their race at their pace. It will be less stressful if each person in your family knows his or her pace or the speed at which they function best at living life. In my husband Bill's newest book, 10 Best Decisions a Man Can Make, he shares an easy-to-use way to identify and evaluate your pace by using five categories of vehicles that describe the characteristics for the speed at which each of us can live: The Muscle Car, The Sports Car, The Semi, The Mail Truck and The Tractor. (Take time to do this activity on a date, with your children around a meal, or with friends over coffee. It makes for some interesting conversation! It also leads to greater understanding and fewer arguments as you get to know those you love better.)

The Muscle Car

Muscle cars have big engines and are designed to go in a straight line with an abundance of pull and dramatic speed. These are the people who like to go fast and stay focused forward, charging hard toward goals. They often make quick decisions, and pursue big opportunities. A Biblical example would be Paul, the apostle who became a believer and quickly turned into a prolific church planter.

The Sports Car

Some of you move more like sports cars. These vehicles are fun, agile and quick. They prefer roads that have lots of turns and quick transitions. They live for the surprise around the next corner of life. They tend to be spontaneous in decision-making and can change directions quickly to take advantage of what they see is a great opportunity.  A Biblical example is Philip who was on his way to one city when God sent him in a completely different direction so someone could hear about the love of God.

The Semi

Some people operate in life more like a semi truck. These people start and stop slowly because they prefer to plan out life. They maintain a steady and even pace because they often carry a great amount of faithful day in and day out type of responsibility. They do not like quick change; they prefer to take time to navigate course corrections. A Biblical example is Martha, who handled most of the hospitality for a house full of Jesus' followers on a daily basis.

The Mail Truck

These people have a sign on their backs, "Makes Frequent Stops." They are intensely interested in individuals and are peaceful even if life is consistently interrupted by conversations, projects and helping people. Life has a route, but their pace is slower because they are constantly checking on the people in their world and their well-being. A Biblical example would be Barnabas who set aside his agenda to take on John Mark as a mentoring project until John Mark was mature and ready to lead again.

The Tractor

Tractors are incredibly useful but they move slowly. These are people who dig in their heels if pushed to accomplish tasks too fast. These folks also do not enjoy sharp turns and tend to work at a slower, even pace, even if the schedule suggests they should speed up to make a deadline. A Biblical example might be Ruth who daily went to the grain fields to glean (a slow, steady task) in order to provide for her and her mother-in-law.

Which of the five vehicles best represents the pace at which you like to live? In our family, I (Pam) am a speedy, spontaneous sports car; Bill is a faithful, people-oriented mail truck. We have one son who is like me, one who is a muscle car and another who is a semi. Before I recognized that each person's pace is a God-given gift for that person to live out their unique calling in life, I used to be frustrated that my "semi" slowed down our family's ability to get out the door. And Bill, whose natural pace as a mail truck is slower than mine, could get frustrated with me, feeling pulled away from people and dragged through life at a pace where deep meaningful conversations were harder to accomplish.  Because two of us are sports cars, the others in the family have learned to trust our instincts for seizing an opportunity because their lives sometimes become much more fun or interesting because of our "Let's try this NOW!" And when a task hits our family, like a broken washing machine, my engineer semi is just the man for the job because it requires a diligent, even, focused pace. On family vacations, we have a family meeting and decide what the family pace will be during our time together. And as our sons have married, knowing my daughter-in-laws' life paces helps avoid misunderstandings or hurt feelings.

Let's Pray

Lord, help me figure out my own pace and live in congruence with the way You wired me. Help me not compare myself in a negative way to others because of the pace I prefer to live life. Also, help me not be frustrated with those in my world when they run at the pace You created them to live their lives. Give us a spirit of appreciation and co-operation.

In Jesus' name,

Amen

Now It's Your Turn

Set aside time this week, or even today, to discuss the pace of life with the people you love. Affirm each of them with a compliment, noting that God's pace inside each person is exactly the way God created him or her. Then dialogue on how to compromise to find a family pace that works when the whole group is gathered together.

More from the Girlfriends

Bill and Pam Farrel are relationship experts, authors of over 38 books includingbest selling Men Are Like Waffles, Women are Like Spaghetti, and this new book, 10 Best Decisions a Man Can Make(and the accompanying DVD series). Resources (including a free articles page) by the Farrels can be found at www.Love-Wise.com

[Judy Harder]

May 13, 2013

The Beatitudes of Anger Management
Part 1
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

"In your anger, do not sin" (Ephesians 4:26).

Friend to Friend

Everyone has to deal with anger. The challenge is to deal with anger in the right way. Anger is powerful - an emotional warning that something is wrong. We have been hurt or rejected. Something has changed and we don't like it! 

Anger itself is not sin. We just have to learn to express anger in the right way. Mishandled anger is destructive but anger that is handled correctly can become a tool for good. God's Word is filled with tips for learning to handle anger in a healthy and godly way.

Be still.

Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God."

If we are busy, it is much easier to ignore or refuse to face and deal with the real source of anger. Anger that is not dealt with in the right way accumulates over time, allowing bitterness to take root and rage to simmer just below the surface of everything we do, say, think or feel. In order to manage anger, we need to incorporate frequent and regular "stops" into our schedules; time set aside to simply be still and hear the voice of God.

Be quiet.

James 1:19-20 "Everyone should be slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires."

Our first response to conflict is often not a response at all ... but a reaction. We jump in with a brutal rebuttal or a thoughtless correction – which is like pouring gasoline on a fire. An explosion is bound to happen. Our first action should be to stop and think instead of rushing to respond in a way that could escalate tensions or provoke an offensive response from others. Listen to the other person before responding. Try counting to ten before saying anything. This may not address the anger directly, but it can minimize the damage you will do while angry.

Be wise.

Proverbs 25:28 "Like a city whose walls are broken down, is a man who lacks self-control."

Wisdom is doing the right thing at the right time for the right reason. Anger management comes from wisdom rooted in self-control. I love the story of Jesus driving the money-changers out of His Father's temple. In John 2:15  Scripture says Jesus "made a whip out of cords." Don't miss this picture. At the height of His anger, Jesus gathered several cords and braided a whip. I imagine it took several minutes at least to form a whip substantial enough to drive grown men anywhere. I think Jesus was so angry that He knew He needed to cool off, so He deliberately chose to be still, quiet and wise. When we are close to losing control of anger, we need to be wise. 

Be discerning.   

Psalm 4:4 "In your anger do not sin ... search your hearts and be silent."

The longer I work with people the more I realize that there is always a reason for their behavior.  Hurt people – hurt people. When you are angry at someone, ask yourself why. Think back to what led up to the conflict. Was it something someone said to you? Has a past problem triggered your present anger? Give yourself time to consider why you are upset and what you should do to handle it in a way that pleases God.

God created us with the capacity for emotions. That means He has a right plan and a right place for emotions in our lives. Anger management is a spiritual discipline that God honors, blesses and empowers. Tomorrow, we will look at four more ways God gives us to control anger.

Let's Pray

Father, please forgive me when I allow anger to control what I say and do. I want to honor You in the way I manage my emotions – especially the anger in my life. Fill my heart with Your peace. Help me cultivate the spiritual discipline of anger management and learn how to control my emotions instead of allowing them to control me.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Evaluate the level of anger in your life. Would people who know you well describe you as an angry person? Identity the source of your anger; then make the commitment to face and deal with whatever is causing your anger. Review each anger management tip. Which one jumps out at you as a starting point for learning to control anger in your life? Read and memorize the verse of Scripture listed with that tip. Pray – asking God to show you the steps you need to take today to manage the anger in your life. Record your thoughts and the truths God gives you in your journal.

More from the Girlfriends

Learning how to control our emotions is an important step in our spiritual maturity. If you need help in controlling anger, check out Mary's E-Bible Study, Anger Management 911 and don't miss Mary's weekly Online Bible Study,Power Up With Proverbs. Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

[Judy Harder]

May 14, 2013

The Beatitudes of Anger Management
Part 2
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

"In your anger, do not sin" (Ephesians 4:26).

Friend To Friend

A minister was making a wooden trellis to support a climbing vine. As he was pounding away, he noticed a little boy watching him. The youngster didn't say a word so the preacher kept on working, thinking the boy would leave – but he didn't. Pleased at the thought that his work was being admire, the pastor finally asked, "Trying to pick up some pointers on gardening?" The little boy said, "Nope. I'm just waiting to hear what a preacher says when he hits his thumb with a hammer."

The people around us want to see what happens when life pushes our buttons and anger puts the squeeze on our emotions. While God created us with the capacity for strong emotions, it is our responsibility to control them instead of allowing them to control us. Yesterday, we looked at four ways to manage anger. Here are four more:

Be focused.   

Psalm 37:8 "Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil."

I witnessed the utter strength and beauty of our daughter-in-law as she went through hours of labor during the birth of our twin grandchildren. The pain was excruciating, but Jodi worked through each contraction by doing two things: controlling her breathing and choosing a focus point. We need to do the same when we are angry. Take a deep breath and focus on the peace of God.

Be understanding.   

James 1:19 "Everyone should be quick to listen."

We have two ears and one mouth for a reason—to listen twice as much as we speak. When you find yourself getting angry with someone, take time to listen to what the other person has to say. Make sure you understand their viewpoint. In fact, it might be a good idea for you to repeat it back to make sure you do get the real point. Only then, when you have processed that information and reigned in your emotions, should you offer a reply. Listening for the purpose of understanding plays a significant role in anger management.

Be kind. 

Proverbs 15:1 "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."     

It had been one of "those" mornings and I was behind schedule in preparing to teach the women's Tuesday morning Bible study at our church. I am fairly certain I did not exude peace and joy as I rushed around. Finally, it looked like everything was ready – everything except my heart. I knew I needed to spend some time alone with God before standing to teach His Word, so I found a quiet room where I could escape for a few minutes of solitude. As I began to pray, the door flew open and crashed against the wall behind it as the husband of one of our group leaders burst into the room. I could tell by the look on his face that he was not happy and that whatever was wrong was definitely my fault. In a very loud and very angry voice, the man began to explain the problem, ending his tirade with the question, "And just what are you going to do about it?" I knew what I wanted to say to the man. I also knew God didn't want me to say it. In a rare moment of wisdom, I faced my accuser with a smile and whispered, "I'll tell you exactly what I am going to do. I am going to do whatever it takes to make you happy."

I was completely unprepared for the man's reaction. His mouth fell open, his eyes widened in surprise - no, make that shock - and he stumbled backwards as if I had hit him. We stared at each other for what seemed like an hour before he finally whispered back, "Thank you." Without another word, the man turned and literally ran out of the room. The most amazing part of this story is that from that day on, he has been one of my strongest encouragers.

The next time someone makes you angry, put a smile on your face. It is hard to stay upset when you are smiling. Smiling is one of the best anger management tips because you can do it anytime, almost anywhere, and to pretty much anyone. The next time you are angry, choose to give a friendly smile of understanding, appreciation, or patience as you listen to the other side of the story.   

Be ready.

1 Peter 5:8 "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour."

The best way to manage anger is to prevent it in the first place. How? Balance your schedule and priorities so that you will not live in a constant state of frustration and exhaustion. Avoid spending time with angry people. Proverbs 22:24 says, "Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man; do not associate with one easily angered." We really do become like the people with whom we spend the most time. Pray constantly, asking the Holy Spirit to help you cultivate the habits that encourage peace – not anger. Memorize Scripture. The Word of God is a powerful weapon in dealing with and managing our emotions.

Anger is today's emotional epidemic. What does it take to make you angry? Do you have a short fuse or a long one? How many relationships in your life have been damaged by your anger? Remember ... more important than the way you were and more important than the way you are ... is the way you can be. Right now, surrender your anger to God and thank Him for a new beginning.

Let's Pray

Father, I need Your power and strength to help me control my anger. Forgive me for the damage and pain my anger has caused the people in my life. I want my emotional health to honor and please You.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Review all of the anger management tips we have explored. How can you plug these tips into your daily life? I encourage you to recruit a girlfriend who will hold you accountable for the way you handle anger. Check in with her once a week. Be honest and open about your anger level.  Journal your thoughts ... the truths God gives you ... the progress you make.

More from the Girlfriends

Learning how to control our emotions is an important step in our spiritual maturity. If you need help in controlling anger, check out Mary's E-Bible Study, Anger Management 911 and don't miss Mary's weekly Online Bible Study, Power Up With Proverbs. Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.