(IN)Courage

[Judy Harder]

25 Point Manifesto for Sanity in 2013
Jan 24, 2013 12:20 am | Ann Voskamp


Nearing the end of January, first month of the year.

Now things are starting to get hard, and new habits, those things that we wear, start to wear thin.

Feeling a bit overwhelmed and not sure how to overcome.

So we nail it to our doors — our 25 point manifesto for sanity in 2013.









1. First things first: Word in. Work out. Work plan.

Open your eyes every morning and just do three first:

Word in: Get into God's Word and let it get into you.
Work out: Work out. Even  5 minutes or this is better than nothing.
Work plan: Write out the work plan. And then work the plan.



2. "What a heart knows by heart is what a heart knows"

Write your memory verses on a sticky note, on a chalkboard, for your pocket.

Because when you are memorizing Scripture, quiet time with the Lord — becomes all the time. (Who doesn't want that?)



3. Flame first.

Light a candle first thing in the morning.

So you remember: You are the light that is put on a stand so that it gives light to everyone in the house.











4. Your work is art: it needs a soundtrack.

Find your music.

Play your music.

Sing your music. This is profound.



5. Step on the Snake Before Breakfast

Before breakfast, crush one hard thing that is tempting you to think there are impossible things.

Before breakfast, crush that one thing and prove that all things are possible with God.



6. Stay in the pool

Michael Phelps said it in an interview: "You've got to stay working in the pool longer than others."

Set the timer. Get in the pool. Stay in the pool. Do you work. Don't get distracted. Don't flit from one thing to another and back.

Don't get out of the pool, don't leave your work, until the timer goes. The way to win is to stay in the pool.











7. Clean a space = clear headspace

Keeping the workspace clean, clears your headspace to think.



8. Go Slow. Life Zone.

Life isn't an emergency. It's a gift.

It's so extraordinary it warrants going slow, held in reverential awe.

Only the slow see their lives. Which makes it seem longer and richer.



9. Take your Laughter vitamins

The more you laugh, the longer you live. You can't afford not to laugh more. Watch this. Make laughter your chocolate.





10. No songs without rhythm

Every song needs a rhythm; every week needs a routine. Tie certain tasks to a day or another activity.

Always memorize after breakfast or always make a double batch of soup on Saturday.

Your life makes music when you play a string of tasks always together.



11. On 25, Take 5

For every 25 minutes "in the pool" working – take 5 minutes off. Live by pomodoros. Really. Life-changing.



12. Unplug to plug into your purpose

Only if you want to plug into peace and purpose and your big picture – then unplug for certain hours everyday.

Constant connectivity effects productivity like a marijuana high.





13.Watch Your Nos & Your Yeses will take Care of Themselves

Everything you say yes to, you say no to something else.

Are your yeses forcing you to say no to what really want to say yes to?

Don't have guilt over a no – because every no is saying a better yes.



14. Daily Stillness Appointment

When is your 5 minute stillness appointment everyday?

Write that midday time in stone. No cancellations allowed. For 5 minutes midday, be still and cease striving.

Know He is God and the day looks very different.

Slow down: You only pass by this way once.



15. If the Heaven's Declare, get out there.

The whole of the sky and the world is speaking endlessly of His glory.

When you step outside and listen, your soul revives. You need that.

You really need one walk outside a day.









16. Work on your Wall before Noon

Before noon, work on your wall; lay three bricks down before 12.

If you don't intentionally work on your wall, the tyranny of the urgent can make your life a rubble heap.

Like Nehemiah, build your wall, building what God has called you to, 3 steps everyday before noon



17. Envision the End Goal

Like God gave Abraham a vision of the stars of the sky and told him he would have that many children, hang up a picture so you always have a vision of your goal.



18. Consistently be Consistent

Random acts of greatness pale in comparison to habitual acts of faithfulness.

It's not what you do every now and then, but what you do everyday, that changes everything.

Do something at the same time everyday and you find yourself a new person.



19. Hard Stops

The only way to get anywhere safely is to make complete stops.

Make hard, complete stops at set times throughout the day to pray. Otherwise you're risking a crash.

9, 12, 3, on the hour, might be times to set an a gentle, chime alarm for – and just stop and pray.

Praying at set times throughout the day is how both Jesus and the early church lived their days: God marking time.









20. Do the Holy, Happiness Habit

Write down 3 things a day you are grateful for. Hunt for His glory. Look for the beauty. Count 1000 gifts.

All research says that giving thanks is guaranteed to make you 25% happier. Who. Doesn't. Want. That.?

Thank Him for this is definitely God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Take the Joy Dare! Make right where you are your happy place.



21. Ebenezers for the Efforts

Mark little milestones! Celebrate the little things!

A treat at the end of the day, end of the week, end of the project, end of the term.

Hang a bunting. Taste something sweet. Take a happy, thumbs up picture to mark your progress!

Make an album of a year, of the process, of the overcoming.



22. Father Affirmations

You need these everyday. Whisper them aloud, who you really are if you are IN Christ:

I am complete in Christ. Colossians 2:9-10
I have direct access to the throne of grace through Jesus Christ. Hebrews 4:14-16
I am free from condemnation. Romans 8:1-2
I am assured that God works for my good in all circumstances. Romans 8:28
I am free from any condemnation brought against me and I cannot be separated from the love of God. Romans 8:31-39
I am confident that God will complete the good work He started in me. Philippians 1:6
I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7



23. Breathe

Breathing in and breathing out like this will radically change the quality of your life. Breathe.







24. Hard and Bad? Hot Bath

An evening routine of a hot bath at the end of the hard and bad days?

Yes.



25. Rest so you can have the rest of God.

Sleep is more than your friend — it's your God-given fuel.

Tomorrow always begins with the night before, so turn in early so tomorrow can turn out well.



~ Written for you with love, by Ann Voskamp



photo credit 1 and 2



Q4U: What else do we need to keep our sanity in 2013? Let's all jump in and help make this a resource when we are overwhelmed:  What verse, what song, what comfort, what great idea — got a link for us? What really works for you when you are overwhelmed?



(Reading in RSS or email? Jump into the comments right here: We're all helping each other out here!)







(in)RL: I Heart Community
Jan 24, 2013 12:10 am | Mel


We're counting down to April 26 & 27 when our (in) real life conference kicks off! And these are a few of our favorite posts from women who participated in last year's event. We're sharing them here so you can get a peek at what all the excitement is about and come and join us. Register here — it's FREE!



I've talked about (in)Real Life a lot lately. And I'm going to talk about it again.

Just today. Promise.

It's just that it was SO. SO. Incredibly. GOOD.

Here's the thing. When I signed up for it ages ago, I was pumped to meet fellow (in)courage readers and bloggers...and just make some new friends. That's totally the ENFP in me. Truly all about relationships.

But I also knew I couldn't host a meet-up, though I did consider it. Too many factors weighed in on that one, and to top it off, I had committed to leading a workout that morning just a few hours before it kicked off. I watched the meet-up lists for weeks, sure that one would be happening at least somewhat close to me.

It didn't happen, and I was disappointed. I knew that if I attended one of the closest ones to me, it still meant more than an hour of driving one way, and I didn't have it in my day.

Instead, I mentioned it to a friend.

I've got an awesome community of girlfriends here. Oh, they're like coffee with extra-yummy creamer on a gloomy, rainy day. They just make my life better, sweeter, and more alive. But the one thing we don't have in common is blogging. Some of them enthusiastically read my blog, and I so value that they show their love to me in that way. But they don't follow other blogs, and so I knew they didn't completely understand what a huge part of my life this place called (in)courage is.

But I opened it up anyway, asking if any of my friends would like to join me.

And two of them did!

Our day looked different from most (in)RL meetups. We already knew each other.

But we still brewed the coffee, ate some awesome food, kicked up our feet...

And something happened that day.

We walked away knowing each other's hearts better. Because let's be honest...we all have joys and sorrows and need those people to love us and pray for us and just be there for us.

I've been so thankful for this community of love that God has given me...but I'm even more thankful now.

As we watched stories unfold...

...like incredible ways God answered prayer for dear sisters-in-Christ

...and how God used a woman who was willing to be obedient to reach many, many women in Kenya

...like the reminder that we were created exactly as He wanted us to be...and WE. ARE. BEAUTIFUL.

...and listened to the beauty of blended voices as women from around the world read Truth together

...we laughed together, we let a few tears drip together (ok...that was probably more me  ), we shared our hearts, we loved a little deeper.

We were community. We still are.

The day didn't end up looking at all like what I had originally thought it might...but I have no doubt that God was in it, and He worked it out exactly as it should have been. He knew what I needed more than I did and met me exactly where I was. As He always, always does.

Thank you to my beautiful sisters at (in)courage for giving us this incredible weekend! I want to hug you all! What a blessing you are...and will continue to be...in my life.

Oh, I heart community!



By: Mel

Photo courtesy of Dawn Camp

You're each invited, you know. It's free, it's fun, and it's so rewarding to connect with other sisters in Christ beyond the blog post. Tune in from home on Friday to watch the Webcast and meetup with friends on Saturday and watch together. Go on, you're much braver than you think. Just CLICK HERE to register.

[Judy Harder]

Sometimes when you step out in faith, surrender and hope – you won't always get the result you expected. That happy ending might not be there yet, and in fact, a big curve ball might be ahead instead.

What do you do when everything you expected God to do turns out to be wrong? When an entirely different (and unwanted) path is before you?

Those prayers that you sent up, when they brought back peace, was it all in your mind? When you felt God put it on your heart that things would get better – was that you making it all up?

Oh girl. Will you take a big, deep breathe with me?

Exhale.

Here is what I know for sure.

The truth is, sometimes we are wrong. Sometimes we hear God wrong. And many times things go wrong, and it's not at all what we wanted or expected.

And that is OK.

It really is ok.

Those things you were wrong about? That was just the beginning of this beautiful path you are on. That curve ball is headed at you so that you can learn to stretch and bend and avoid the hit.

There is so much grace. Grace for being wrong, grace for having the expectations of our own plan instead of His, and grace for stumbling around and — yes — even grace for losing hope. And those prayers ALWAYS are heard.

God wants to pick us back up, gently dust us off, and set us off onto the next path (that might hold another curve ball for us, still).

It's that growing and stretching (and oh, it's so uncomfortable) that strengthens the soul muscle more and more. Makes us so much more like Him.

So today as I see that curve ball coming at me, I'm remembering these words on grace and stretching. It's the beginning, not the end.

***By Arianne, To Think Is To Create

[Judy Harder]

A Sunday Scripture
Jan 27, 2013 08:15 am | incourage


Therefore if you have any encouragement
from being united with Christ,
if any comfort from his love,
if any common sharing in the Spirit,
if any tenderness and compassion,
then make my joy complete by being like-minded,
having the same love,
being one in spirit and of one mind.
Philippians 2:1-2




Are You In Need Of A New Year Makeover?
Jan 26, 2013 12:20 am | Melissa Michaels



Do you ever just feel like you want to throw everything you have in the garbage and start over?

Your disorganized house. Your stuff. Your clothes. Your furniture. Your miscellaneous boxes. Your old flabby body. Your kids. Whatever.

Well, of course I'm joking, kind of, but you know what I mean, right?


I'm just talking about being in that season where you are ready in general for a new start.Sometimes you just reach a point where you are tired of how things are. You don't feel like things are working for you anymore and you are ready to do something about it. Maybe you have just been through a tough season or have let parts of your life or health or home fall apart a bit. You know you need to make some big changes. And you desperately feel like you are ready for a fresh perspective.


The new year is motivating for setting new goals and planning a few "life makeovers."I've made many new years resolutions, and the challenge is to be committed to work on those areas of your life for the long haul, not just until the end of January! My goal is to commit to changes over the course of a year, with several manageable goals along the way.

Last year we were really ready for some focused reorganization and updates around our home, after a long season of pressure establishing a church plant and a start up business.It seemed like a really big and exhausting undertaking to get reorganized at home while continuing our efforts to manage the church and business, but we were determined to catch up on some much needed repairs and projects that were weighing us down. We knew in the long run, these changes would energize us and help us to be more productive and at peace at home.


By the grace and blessing of God and our perseverance to complete projects, one year later we now have a home that feels much more under control. We worked on updating our entire main floor and master bedroom one room at a time (or sometimes several at a time!) from the front door right on through the house– everything feels so much better and more under control now! We can start this year knowing we are much more organized and on top of things than we were the year before! That is a great feeling.


If you want, you can follow along with all those home updates and before and afters at The Inspired Room!


This year my husband and I are giving our marriage a little makeover. We are re-establishing time to just have fun together and we are setting some boundaries on our crazy schedules. We are going to start walking together for fitness and to give us time together away from the house. We have some other ideas of things we want to implement to keep our marriage growing and close. After seeing the results of our "home makeover" last year, I'm excited to see how we can strengthen our marriage (by the grace of God) as we focus more time, energy and prayer on that area of our life this year.


Which area of your life would you like to makeover this year? By the grace, blessing and mercy of God, and some determination and goal setting on our part, it is exciting to see that we can make positive changes and makeover parts of our life in 2013.

[Judy Harder]

One Painfully Obvious Thing a Genius Taught Me About Life
Jan 28, 2013 12:20 am | Emily Freeman


My laptop had issues, so I made a a Genius Bar reservation at the Apple store. (Genius = the computer smartees who stand behind the counter and answer your questions about computer-y stuff. Also it just took me three tries to spell 'genius.' I felt the need to confess that).



On the day of my reservation, I show up with my laptop and a handful questions about some stuff and some things. I pull out my MacBook, open it up in front of of the Genius, and start to explain my woes.

He is kind and patient and doesn't call me stupid. As I'm talking, I notice how filthy my keyboard is under the perfect computer light of the Apple store. I mention this and think for sure he will take my laptop to the back room and wash it with some super special Apple-grade, Steve Jobs approved washer cloth.

This is not what he does.

Instead, he pulls out an alcohol wipe from a plastic container behind the counter and swiftly wipes my keyboard clean. It looks new in three seconds.

No magic Apple grade washer cloth.

Just a simple, cheap, I-bought-this-at-Wal-Mart alcohol wipe.

I've had a filthy keyboard for weeks, months maybe. But I didn't know what was safe to clean it with. So I left it dirty. Filthy dirty. Like a kid.

In that moment, I realized something I've known about myself but continue to learn with maddening regularity: I make things too hard.

For a long time, I did this with writing. I'm not a real writer. Real writers already know how to do stuff. Real writers get picked. Real writers don't doubt themselves.

Those kinds of thoughts ruled the day. Until a message built up inside me for so long that my desire to get it out of me outweighed my fear of doing it wrong.

As it turns out, I actually am a real writer. And I don't need a decree from the King of Words or magic dust from the Writer Fairy to tell me so.

You actually are something, too.

You have something to offer.

There is a trail of beauty just waiting to be left by you.

And you don't need permission, from Steve Jobs or anyone else.

Q: Are you waiting for a Genius to tell you that you already have everything you need? Are you making it too hard? What are you waiting for?

"His divine power has given us everything we need for life." 2 Peter 1:3

By Emily Freeman, Chatting at the Sky

[Judy Harder]

Moms and Me.
Jan 29, 2013 12:20 am | Annie Downs




My friend group has changed significantly in the last ten years.

While my life place hasn't [still single at 32], the majority of my friends have gotten married and many have had children.

Whether we want to say it outloud or not, it changes things.

Sometimes, in the coolest of ways. In fact, my best friend's six year old son tells people I'm HIS best friend. I don't argue. I kinda agree. He's the coolest. I love being around the offspring of my friends- it's like tiny versions of the people you choose to be around anyways. Who can hate that?

But with the change comes some challenges as well. There are times when I'm frustrated with my mom friends and times when they are frustrated with me. Our lifestyles are so different – our free-time so different – that there are times when the chasm of diapers and naps seems too wide to cross.

Yesterday, a mom friend of mine wrote about all the ways that singles can better love moms. It's such an interesting conversation I think. Because you are in one of those camps- you are a mom with mom-ish responsibilities, or you aren't.

So here are a few of my thoughts on how moms can help grow those relationships with non-moms.

1. I like being around your kids. But I know you need to get away sometimes too. So let's balance- I wanna hang with your kids while you are there because I love them. But when you need a break and want us to grab coffee or a glass of wine, just say! [And if you don't like being around kids, non-mom friends, that's totally fine! But you need to communicate that lovingly and honestly.]

2. I don't mind babysitting. But I'm not your babysitter. If you're in a pinch or me and the kids have talked about making that cookie recipe every Sunday at church, duh. Call me. But babysitting isn't my side job. I'm a friend who loves your family. It's different.

3. Tell me how I can help. If your baby just had a massive diaper blow-out and the big brothers need to be entertained for forty minutes while you have a moment, call me. Let me come over or bring dinner or grab that other kid from soccer. Don't assume I can't/won't/don't want to help. I want to help. Trust that I will say no if I have to/want to.

4. Can I meet some of your husband's single friends? Please? Because if y'all like him, I might too.

5. Remember that I'm busy too. I almost burst a blood vessel in anger a few months ago when a dad made an insensitive comment on twitter about how singles have no idea what it is like to be busy. True, I have never been a parent. But here's what else is true- that guy has NO IDEA what it is like to be single in 2013. So to make the assumption that I don't get "busy" just because I don't get busy birthing is really hurtful. Be honest with me about your daily struggles and when you feel overwhelmed, that's not complaining. I want to hear about your life. I promise I won't assume what it is like to be a mom if you don't assume what it is like to be single today.

6. Tell me no. If I call and want to hang but you are pooped out or pooped on, just say. I can handle it. [And dear non-moms, if your mom friend has to say no, that's not your cue to write her off. Just try again another day.]

7. Send me home. Johnny pitches a fit and Katie is riding the cat around the living room and you feel like our conversation is making you lose your mind because of all the crazy going on? Just send me home. I can handle it. But I'll tell you this, if you send me home five hangouts in a row, I'm probably going to be a little gun shy to hang out again.

8. We're gonna make it. You're still you. I am still me. We picked each other. So no matter what season of life, I want us to be in it. Together.

The other truth? You may disagree with all those points and feel totally different. That's fine. What matters is that you are honest and open with the moms in your life about what you need as a non-mom. Just like with all our relationships, using words and honesty dripping in love and kindness, even when it is scary, is always the best thing.

I think this is a super important conversation to have... so no matter where you fall on the mom spectrum – not one, almost one, one of many, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

How can non-mom friends know and love and better understand their mom friends?

How can mom friends be a loving friend to non-moms?

By Annie Downs // AnnieBlogs






I Clicked A Link And Said Yes
Jan 29, 2013 12:10 am | Tami Vanhoy


We're counting down to April 26 & 27 when our (in) real life conference kicks off! And these are a few of our favorite posts from women who participated in last year's event. We're sharing them here so you can get a peek at what all the excitement is about and come and join us. Register here — it's FREE!



(in)courage, I clicked the link, said 'yes...I'll attend', sealing it with a $10 commitment (which is like a $100 commitment in my current budget!).

(in)courage, I resisted the urge to back out the night before, using my oldest son, home on leave from the Navy as my reasonable and understandable excuse.

(in)courage, after driving an hour and a half to the event and circling the block no less than 3 times once I got there, I talked myself out of turning around and going home when I got to the address of this home I'd never been to – and there were no other cars parked and no indication that an event was about to be held here.

(in)courage, I put on my best 'extroverted' smile, dug deep to find my best 'extroverted' personality, stepped out of the car and said 'Hi, I'm Tami'.

One might think I was going before a room of women to present myself for judgment and validation, feeling sure I would be the one standing alone, left out of the 'click' because I just didn't measure up. I wasn't...was I?

How ridiculous was my fear?  After all, I was going to a meeting of other like-minded women, put on by the founders of (in)courage, part of the DaySpring company.  The event was called (in) real life ~ (in)RL ~ and the theme was 'community'.  I should have been excited to meet women who read the same blogs I read and worship Jesus as I do.  Instead, I was filled with insecurity and trepidation.

Why in the world did I sign up in the first place?

Obedience.

Psalm 143:8 ~
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in You.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
I just knew I was supposed to go.

When we come to God on a daily basis and start our day with this question "what do You want me to do today Lord?" we also have to be ready to obey.

And so, I walked in the door with my plate of Mini Pecan Pie Muffins... dying to self and living in Him. After almost a year of hiding and healing some deep wounds, I knew God had asked me to make this step so He could strengthen and encourage me for His purposes and His plans.

When my flesh is afraid, worried, intimidated.... If I am walking in obedience I just need to lift up my soul to Him and He will strengthen me for the journey.

And so my reward for obedience?

....Some new friends ~

...inspiring conversations

...encouraging exchanges

...and new possibilities

I am sure and confident of this ~ my God does not do random things.  He has a plan and is weaving a beautiful tapestry for His glory and our good.

The women I met on this predestined day had varied stories to tell of how they came to this one event, and all I could think about was 'why God...what are you weaving here?'

I know it will take time for me to see the purpose for each thread of the tapestry.  Threads that He purposefully chose to weave together on this day, at this home, at this time in our lives.  I have time.  I'll keep asking Him, 'what today Lord', and one day I'll stop and realize this particular tapestry is done and each one of the beautiful women in the picture above will be represented by their contributing threads.

The recipe today is: What Today Lord?

The ingredients are from:  Psalm 143:8

The directions are: trust God completely, without question or hesitation.  Step boldly in obedience, knowing His love is unfailing and He desires to show us the way to go.

Prayer:
Father, I am blessed by Your daily, even minute by minute, care for me.  Your Word tells me...promises me...that You cherish me and desire good things for me.  All I need to do is seek You, follow You and obey.  Even if I obey 'scared'...You do not condemn my fear but replace it with strength and courage.  And so, Lord, each day I come to you asking "what today Lord?"  Give me eyes to see Your leading and a heart ready to obey. Thank You Lord, for the blessings of obedience.  Keep my eyes wide open to seeing even the smallest of blessings each and every day I follow Your lead.  I trust You Lord. I'm lifting my soul up to You so You can fill me up, one day at a time.  I come before You in the name of my Savior, Jesus Christ.  Amen.

By: Tami

Photo courtesy of Dawn Camp

You're each invited, you know. It's free, it's fun, and it's so rewarding to connect with other sisters in Christ beyond the blog post. Tune in from home on Friday to watch the Webcast and meetup with friends on Saturday and watch together. Go on, you're much braver than you think. Just CLICK HERE to register.

[Judy Harder]

Living In The Moment When You Only Have The Here and Now
Jan 30, 2013 12:20 am | Bonnie Gray


wet petals gentle at my feet

I'm not sure where I'm heading.

The morning has barely breathed its warmth on the grass.  Winter still blankets the hillside, with tree limbs stretching out and bare, like the arms of a child sleeping, tousled out of her grandma's quilt.

I just know I need to keep walking.

Otherwise, I'd just stay in my bed.

I'd pull up the covers and close my eyes, even though I can't fall asleep.

And then, when the hands on the clock tick tock towards noon, I'd get up to make myself some lunch.

I'd ready my heart and gather my strength.

To pick up the kids from school.

I'd ask how their day went, as I walk with them, arm wrapped around their shoulders.  I'd hear about Ronny and blacktop soccer, how TJ and his friends played Star Wars at second recess.  I'd make a big fuss over the cottonball snowman with crazy eyes that sweet CJ squished together with Elmer's glue that left his little fingers sticky from preschool.

I'm present with my children, as I pull out the fridge door, count two mozzarella cheese sticks, slice some apples and place some Wheat Thins on plates for a snack.

But, as they munch and the afternoon sun starts to cast it's rays through the window, touching my shoulder, stretching long and warm into the room, onto the wooden floors, I remember.

I remember how I spent my morning.

And how for this one day, I tried to live in the here and now.  With Jesus.

I whispered tears as I lay on the pillow –

Jesus, Savior, pilot me
Over life's tempestuous sea
Unknown waves before me roll
Hiding rock and treacherous shoal
Chart and compass come from Thee
Jesus, Savior, pilot me.*

I play this song over and over.  They form the only prayer that feels strong and true.

Chart and compass come from Thee
Jesus, Savior, pilot me.

When All You Have
Living in the moment sounds beautiful when you have the freedom to rest — when you are able to reminisce the good times and dream about the future.

But, what if God brings you to a place in life, where all you have is the here and now – when all that surrounds you are the problems of today, wounds of the past and fears of the future?

And what if the here and now is painful, disorienting and difficult?

When rest doesn't come easy — when you are overwhelmed by life's breakers — where does someone like me go?

I know that some of you will tell me, Be still and know that He is God.

I know this because this is what I've been telling myself over and again, like a magic wand whose pixie dust has somehow run out after so many shakes.

But, how can I be still when my head feels dizzy, my stomach nauseous and I can't stop the memories?

You don't have to suffer from post-traumatic stress like me to understand there are storms in life we can't avoid.

This place of no man's land is where I've met my Savior, crying out among the waves and the winds of what I don't understand.

How long do I have to stay in this place of just the here and now?

I want to get back to moving forward — get back to doing — even if it's just a work in progress.

I'll do whatever it is you want, I plead. Just tell me what to do.

There Was No Sail
Maybe that's how Noah felt, as he stood in the ark, lurching and chaotic, with wild animals screeching and his grandbabies tummies seasick and unhappy.

Maybe after so many weeks passing by, closed in by the same monotonous storming, with death and darkness wiping all signs of life outside the ark, Noah longed to see the stars twinkle again.

Maybe Noah struggled to fathom what life after the flood would look like, when life as he'd known it could never return to be.

Perhaps even though Noah knew God would not forget Him, his days still dragged on like a thousand years each morning he woke up to more rain — and still more months of waiting after it did stop, because the waters still left him stranded.

God took painstaking effort to give Noah the blueprints and details of the ark that would save him from the flood.

But, among all the minutia of measurements of timber, windows and even the door, God left out two specifications.

There was no sail.  And there was no rudder.

The ark was not designed to be navigated.

The fate of everyone who trusted God enough to walk into the hollow of the ark — and allowed the door to be closed —  was placed in the hands of God.

Maybe we were never designed to steer this life, to go the way we want.

Maybe peace isn't instantaneous, but a conviction to run into the arms of the One who can love us in mist of our storms.

When all we have is the here and now, we can allow Jesus to pilot us where He wants us to go.

Living In The Moment By Faith
Living in the moment — when we are doing it by faith — calls us to let go of trying to steer the ark.

Living in the moment — means surrendering to –

– the realities God wants us to live into,

– the things God wants to do in us,

– the people, dreams and places He wants us to let go of,

– the friendships He wants us to enter into,

– the beauty He wants to soothe our hearts with,

– the words of love and deep acceptance He whispers for us to receive.

Maybe you might be tempted to feel as I do, that feeling sad, fearful, or anxious is dangerous territory we shouldn't travel through.

But, for some of us, these are the very waters God has safely charted us to enter into.

Because with Jesus, we are being rescued from all that needs to be let go.

With Jesus, He can take us through the flood and all that it's washing away.

With His arms of compassion, heart heavy with our pain, Jesus is strong and gentle enough to carry us safe through the water.

Even though the waters may run wide — and life as we know it is being all washed away.

Pilot Thee
Jesus will guide us to safe shores — even as we lean weary and unable — onto His chest.

Jesus whispers to us,

I know you are weary.  I know you are worn.

Come.

You can be sad.

You can feel lost.

Don't wait until you're no longer fearful.

Come now as you are.

I will pilot thee.

These are the words that follow me, like the first petals of spring wafting through the air.

As they drift into my heart, I drive to the mountains where I begin my steps along a dirt path.

Today, I've decided that I will get up from my bed and go walking.

Even as my thoughts tell me all my cares are still with me, I look down and I notice.

Petals have just scattered so softly, the morning rain hasn't drowned them into the asphalt.

I look up and see the wind blowing cherry blossoms from the stem — and I see beauty staring at me.

In this moment, my here and now lies in these petals.

Because I know Jesus just brushed them to my feet.

Tomorrow Will Be Kinder
One day, our days of trusting will bring us to Mount Ararat.

We will remember it wasn't sin that kept us in the ark. 

It was our faith in Jesus that gave us courage to stay pressed into His embrace.

Even as the storms swelled and swept.

We will remember the few and faithful who kept company with us in the ark, as they spoke as friends, pitching in the dark.

On the days that are hard, remember a time will come – when tomorrow will be kinder.

Then, you will be able to shed tears as I have, a little less silent, more held and beloved.

You don't need to know where it's all heading.

The One who loves us — who calls us His Beloved and carries your tears in a bottle — does.

And He's with you.

Here and now.



"You keep track of all my sorrows.
You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book."
Ps56:8

~~~~~

How is God calling you to live in the moment — in the here and now — with Him?

Pull up a chair.  Take a moment to speak from your heart. 
Click to comment and read each other's thoughts here.

~~~~~

* Lyrics taken from "Jesus, Savior, Pilot Me" by Robbie Seay Band. Click to listen.

By Bonnie Gray, the Faith Barista, serving up shots of faith in everyday life.

Join Bonnie and faith friends on her blog, as they travel the journey of faith together, swapping stories one moment at a time.

 

[Judy Harder]

On Being (in)RealLife
Jan 31, 2013 12:10 am | Anna


We're counting down to April 26 & 27 when our (in) real life conference kicks off! And these are a few of our favorite posts from women who participated in last year's event. We're sharing them here so you can get a peek at what all the excitement is about and come and join us. Register here — it's FREE!



This weekend, I went to a virtual beach house with nearly 30 other women. We savored chocolate cupcakes and drank hot coffee. We put our feet up, scooted together on couches, shared blankets, laughed and cried.

Every day, posts from (in)courage make their way to my inbox, and every day I read them. For over three years, (in)courage has made their site a virtual beach house, a 'home for the hearts of women.' We gather in that online space to reflect, share, learn, pray, and encourage one another. Last September, they announced their 'un'conference called (in)RL {RL = real life}. (in)courage would provide the content via webcasts, and we were to gather in our communities and just be together in real life. Before I could think about it, I bought a ticket and created a local meet-up immediately. See, getting together with girlfriends isn't easy for me. First of all, it seems that whenever a group makes plans, someone has to drop out at the last minute. Something always comes up that gets deemed more important than girlfriend time. And how many times have you dragged yourself out of the house to get together with someone when actually, you really didn't want to? Let's be honest... staying at home in our sweats is easy. Saying 'I'm fine' is easy. Letting a friend leave a voicemail is easy.



goodies loaded in my trunk, on our way to inRL

Thanks to (in)courage (and to the Lord, for putting the prompt on my own heart and Allison's, who graciously offered to co-host the gathering at her inlaws beautiful home), nearly 30 women gathered just north of the Twin Cities. We drove from all over the state, wearing jeans and waterproof mascara, just to be together for a few hours. The chocolate was rich, the coffee deep, the conversation sweet.Not risking our hearts for friendships sake is easy. But gathering with women that we've never met before, dropping the 'fine', really being present with one another... that's where the beauty lives. And the funny thing is, I adore hosting. Baking and decorating and remembering little details and greeting at the door and fluttering around... bring it. I love it. But letting my guard down and being real... that's where the trouble lies.

It was so good that I don't even have any pictures – we were so busy being together that we even forgot to take a group shot! Gah.



Mason jars filled with shells and sand and candles were placed around the home, as well as a few lovely products from DaySpring. We prayed and wept as women spoke to us about community, something that we deeply crave and manage to all too easily evade. But on this rainy Saturday, we didn't shy away. We bravely left our homes and families and drove and found each others hearts in a basement room. 1300 other women did the same thing, in 20 different countries. Impressive, isn't it? And I do believe that heaven resounded and satan trembled and our hearts glowed softly as we gathered in real life to praise the One who created us for real life. I believe that in our being in community, in our choosing to hug beyond the screen, in our being brave, we made Him proud. I can't wait to do it again.

———-

You are able to purchase the webcasts and study guides  and the super cute (in)RL tshirt. Tell me, who will you gather with in real life? Who are your girlfriends?

By: Anna {girlwithblog}

You're each invited, you know. It's free, it's fun, and it's so rewarding to connect with other sisters in Christ beyond the blog post. Tune in from home on Friday to watch the Webcast and meetup with friends on Saturday and watch together. Go on, you're much braver than you think. Just CLICK HERE to register.





I'd Never Been Told That Before
Jan 31, 2013 12:10 am | Jennifer Schmidt




Clutching the crisp, white note, I held my 20 year old breath as I reread the words scribbled on the stationary by the Director of Admissions at my university.

"Jennifer,

Thank you for your servant leadership this year on our Personal Touch Admissions staff. Your hospitality welcomes each visitor, and your quiet and gentle spirit blesses each one."

I wept. I'd never been told that before, and doubted its validity.

Since childhood, that "quiet and gentle spirit" mentioned in 1 Peter 3:4 served as a reminder that my extroverted and outgoing personality would "never" achieve that elusive Godly disposition.

It started in Kindergarten when that first school progress report reached home. A check mark indicated 'lack of self control' with the accompanying comment, "Jenny needs to stop chatting with her neighbors," and so it began. An endless cycle of second guessing.

By the time I could actually pen New Year's Resolutions, each year's list contained some form of "You'll be more popular if you'd be like the quiet girls. Stop talking so much. Don't talk."

As my identity shaped, my tender heart failed to embrace the other remarks. The ones where the teachers scribbled, "Jenny is a friend to everyone. She always has a smile." Those words didn't matter to me. I wanted to be one of those sweet, quiet ones.

I saw myself as a talker and I didn't like it. I identified this "character flaw" early on and set about determined to stifle how the Lord wired me.

Decades later, time stood still as I leafed through my Junior High Diary. Earlier this evening, I opened to this very page, and as I read, it placed me right back in my childhood bedroom. Emotions overwhelmed me.



"I have totally changed my image. Now I am not "Big" Mouth Jenny but much better."

Much better? In comparison to what?

Oh precious twelve year old self – do you know that you were created in HIS image? The image of God? You are an image bearer of your Creator. He did not make a mistake when He formed you, and He certainly does not want you to spend so much emotional energy concerned with changing your image.


Haven't you heard your parents affirmation? The Lord has wired you in such a perfectly unique way. He has destined you to use your words for His glory.

As I write now, it's through the lens of a forty something year old woman who embraces the truth of scripture. I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, fully and uniquely accepted.

I have seen decades of the Lord's faithfulness with myriads of examples of how He has allowed me to use my gift of words to reach the kingdom, so how can I ever struggle with those same feelings that vexed that innocent junior high girl?

Recently, they reared their ugly head.



As our Compassion bloggers Peru team wrapped up our time together with a round table debriefing, a team member questioned the leader.

"With all the teams you've taken, have there been many instances where bloggers have surprised you or are different than what you thought?"

Since many bloggers are self declared introverts, I was curious as to what he'd say. I'd heard the stories of how difficult it was for many bloggers to travel cross culturally and personality played a large part in that.

"Jennifer." He responded to the question and looked at me. "I never thought you'd be so out going. You can't really tell that on a blog."

I was shocked. Seriously? Me? And then my mind started racing.

For all I know, he meant that remark as a huge complement and possibly that my "never met a stranger" tendencies helped take a load off his plate, but for me, I sat right back in Mrs. Dixon's classroom. All the little insecurities that I'd laid down years ago came flooding front and center.

My mind reeled in fast motion, cataloging all my actions of the past week.

Had I talked at inappropriate times? I mean, it was a very emotional week and I know I annoyed them all with my humming of The Sound of Music late at night. I guess when they wanted to write, I kind of wanted to talk through the experiences of our day...

Jen, stop it.

I knew that my exhaustion and emotions opened the door to Satan snagging a foothold on all the God things that had just occurred. I was not about to give that liar victory.

I thought back to 1 Peter 3:3-4, and what I knew to be true about a quiet and gentle spirit.

3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4 Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

1 Peter 3:3-4

The first verse is fairly clear cut. Let's not become consumed with appearances, but then there's that second verse.

What had I learned from my Admissions Director about true beauty?

After receiving that note, I spent hours of inductive bible study dissected that scripture passage.

This verse is not referencing a perfect personality issue, like I always thought. It's a "spirit" issue, a heart issue.

It's the "why" behind the "who."

My desire is to love the Lord thy God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. In doing that, it sometimes manifests itself through an outgoing personality, while at the same time demonstrating a meek and gentle spirit.

It took me decades to realize that truth.

Now does that mean a meek and gentle spirit ooze through me at all times? I wish. Does it mean I still have to work on practicing self control? Absolutely, but it means a stronger personality can still adorn a quiet and gentle spirit. They are not mutually exclusive.

In a way, it goes back to the coined phrase, "The grass is always greener on the other side."

Extroverts wish they had more introverted tendencies, and introverts wished they were more extroverted.

The point is God cares about our heart.

He desires for us to cast aside the labels we've carried far too long, and embrace who we were created to be. To bloom where we are planted with out striving for another image.  We are created in HIS image, not some dressed up version of someone else.

When I think of my propensity for wordiness, I remember:

Jen, always listen more than you speak.

When you speak, speak with discernment and love. Speak with passion. Speak boldly, and always speak words of blessing and encouragement.

If this is true, then I welcome the assessment, "I never knew you were so outgoing."

Can any of you relate?

Do you hold onto old labels from child hood or personality traits that you've wished away for far too long?

I'd love to kick those to the curb with you. If you choose to share them in the comments, I'd be honored.

Shared by Jen (or Jenny, if you knew her before she was 18, or Jennifer, if you're being properly introduced.) One of those three share her journey of Balancing Beauty and Bedlam at her lifestyle blog or at her newly launched food blog, 10 Minute Dinners.

[Judy Harder]

The Art Film Phase of an Epic Adventure
Feb 04, 2013 12:20 am | Tsh Oxenreider


The kids can be absolutely and utterly insane, but as soon as I crack open a book and start reading out loud, the room quietens. They want to hear the journey through the pages I'm about to take, and a mere few pages in, the three are huddled around me, eyes poring over pictures and minds absorbed in the story.

The sermons that stick with me most are the ones that take me on a story. Either through vibrant illustrations from the speaker's life or a unique allegory told to pierce my heart in just the right way, it's the stories that best stick with us, not the three-point application. Admit it—it's probably the same for you.

The movies that best suck me in and leave me hooked until the credits roll are the ones with a fascinating, remarkable plot—the Bourne series, Jane Austen adaptations, Ocean's 11 through 13. It's the same with the small screen—how else would early twentieth century England be fascinating without the Crawley family and the servants below?

We all love a good story.

And I believe we're all in the thick of a story—our own personal Story, where we're the protagonist. God is the author, and He's orchestrated the perfect setting, characters, conflict, climax, and resolution for our storyline. And our own individual stories, from birth to death, are all part of One Big Story, a beautiful, redemptive plot that leaves us hanging gape-mouthed with wonder and obsession (I'll give you a hint about the end though: it all works out perfectly. Better than we could ever imagine.)



But if you're like me, sometimes my Story isn't that terribly exciting. It feels easier to live out a good story when there's adventure, chaos, and danger, and I've been there before. But that doesn't comprise most of my life. Really, my days are mostly spent changing diapers, getting dinner on the table, paying our mortgage, and going for runs. It's hard to believe you're in the thick of something exciting when your days are—well, less so.

What does it look like to live out a good, relevant, gets-me-up-in-the-morning Story when it still just feels like.... regular life?

Believe it or not, there is encouragement that the mundane is still part of a Good Story. Parenting and living the day-in, day-out of raising three kids is not exactly erupting volcanoes and chasing after the bad guy and falling in love Victorian-style. It's a lot of daily grind.

What gives me encouragement, then, is that the daily grind is shaping me into a better character for my story. Easy stuff doesn't make me stronger. It's the hard, repetitive challenges that build and shape me into a character worth reading. God's not in any hurry to build His characters and then set them off in order to rush to the climax of the story. He's a better storyteller than that. He'll get there.



William Wallace had the darn English to contend with, but it was his early years of turmoil that shaped him perfect to lead the Scots in battle. Lizzy Bennett endured ambiguity, her position in Victorian England, and her mother, but those were the things that made her into a remarkable character we all root for when Mr. Darcy finally comes around.

Those daily drops of character-building were in their stories, too, but we don't really see them.

No life is grind-free, but that grind can be more fun—or at least better-endured—if we trust in the Author of our story, who's got the perfect climax and resolution in mind. Whether our plot feels more like currently in the character-driven art film phase or in the epic climax of tossing a ring into the fires of Mt. Doom, it's all stellar. He has an adventure for all of us.



He hasn't forgotten about you and your laundry-folding days or your hours spent in a cubicle. You're the perfect character for the story He's crafted just for you. And it's gonna be awesome. The angels are popping the popcorn right now, I bet.

What sort of movie is your life like? How do you find contentment during character-building moments?

By Tsh, Simple Mom

[Judy Harder]

Who Am I? I AM.
Feb 05, 2013 12:10 am | Stephanie Bryant


Warm rays poured down. My face and forearms felt giggly to meet a friend they had missed, the sun. Children played near the fountain with coats draping, begging to come off.

My dad's arm reached around me and gave even more warmth.  We sat on a bench enjoying the spring like weather in the middle of winter, waiting for a lunch table after church.

I leaned over to my parents and told them my simple epiphany during the sermon that morning. . ..my identity is in Christ.

Yes, I realize so basic for a Jesus follower. But yet such a huge concept I have come to fresh realization time and time again. A reminder of who I am, in I AM.

The Spirit reveals this is something I've been struggling with and didn't even realize.

I dream for her, the little one that we've longed for, prayed for.  I wonder what God has in store for her young life. Great Kingdom plans I pray, for her and the role she'll play for His glory.

And this makes me wonder if I have lived the Kingdom-Role I was destined for. Have I fulfilled the mission God had in mind for me before the foundation of the earth? Has my life up to this point counted? {Don't we all want to know that?!}

As He knits our baby girl together in my secret place, I'm curious about her identity and mine at the same time. I'm transitioning to a new role of mother and I couldn't be more thrilled. But there are so many unknowns looking forward and curiosities looking back.

I will have a new name, mother. I will experience new pains and longings and new joys unspeakable. I am transforming into a new creation yet am still me. Nothing has been taken away, but only added. The juggle, the balance, the curiosities. . . they abound.

I watch others. I wonder. I start to compare. I try to sift through the advice, what not to do, the life examples. But God calls me back to my real identity. An identity that doesn't need a fancy title, to be made important, or be concerned what it looks like from the outside as if a grand accomplishment.

I AM tells me I am His. My identity was never my own. My plans are futile apart from Him. Only His plans matter. Only He can accomplish Kingdom work through me. My identity is hidden IN HIM.

This is what I would say to my daughter someday. I pray to understand it myself  so she won't only hear the words but she will see a life that reflects the very ideal.

Doesn't that make you take a deep breath? It does me. The pressure is off. The duties are gone. The wondering is ceased.



I know that He has good plans for me He put forth in advance. He tells me so. {Eph 2:10}

I know that His identity is more important than mine. He tells me to make Him known and not myself. {Col 1:27}

I know that I have died to this life {and continue to do so each day as best I can} but my REAL LIFE is hidden with Christ in God. {Col 3:3}

I soak in this truth like the rays of sunshine I feel on my skin.



Are you struggling with your identity? Are you overwhelmed by the possibilities? Do you want your real life to matter?


Be with Christ in God and let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. {Col 3:15}





Searching For Snow
Feb 05, 2013 12:10 am | rachel


This morning I jumped out of bed because I couldn't wait to peek out the window and see a snowflake. First I checked my phone to view the radar and sure enough the radar was indicating the precipitation falling outside my window was in fact snow.

At first I couldn't see it so I turned on the porch light and peered out into the dark morning. There it was... snow. My eyes teared up. Every time it snows I cry.




I am not an extremely emotional person but snow makes me cry. It is a reminder of grace for me.


Though the winter is cold we get to experience the beauty of snow. Snow is a gift from God. The white powder blankets the dead, cold earth and everything looks fresh and new for a time.



Lamentations 3:22-24

The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The LORD is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in him."




This morning the snow reminded me of the mercies of God that are new every morning. As seasons and temperatures change God is still faithful to reflect his beauty, majesty and power.




In winter He provides snow which blankets the earth with its beauty.




In the spring when the earth is soggy and muddy, and the thunderstorms are roaring God provides daffodils and other early spring blooms.




In the summer, for relief from the heat, God provides the coolness of water.




And of course in the fall, only God could imagine creating leaves to turn their most beautiful colors right before they die and begin to decay.




His mercies are new every morning, great is Your faithfulness.




God is faithful. With every change of season there is no surprise; there is death and beauty. The old season is gone and the new season is coming. If God is faithful to give us new seasons, of course God is faithful to provide new mercies for me every morning.




Raising my kids in the church has been a great blessing. Not because they will learn to "be well behaved" or it will "look good on their college applications to have been involved in church." It is nice because all around you there are parents who have walked in your shoes, or we could even say, "in your sweatpants."




The other morning God's tender mercies arrived to me in an email from a friend in church who witnessed my frustrations with parenting from the night before.




She wrote:

A word of encouragement from Proverbs:

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. Proverbs 22:6

When my children were young, I wondered why the word "old" was in Proverbs 22:6.  Now I realize that when our children are young, it is the season of life when we train and train and train and train and train.  We sow for a very long time and MUCH later we reap.  Our consistency and perseverance during the younger years is exhausting, but it is worth it!  Time passes so quickly!  You will reap in a season to come, but now you are in the season of sowing and training.  Keep up the good fight!  If you need additional encouragement, the book of Proverbs was my go-to book when my kids were toddlers.

Have a day filled with the assurance of God's promises.




What a blessing to find in my inbox that morning.


The little years are tough. For me it is a season like the coldest winter. Where is my snow?




We have been training...and training...and training...It takes exactly what my friend said to me in her sweet note: consistency and perseverance. It is a marathon and not a sprint.


The goal is not good behavior, a good resume, a decent job, or that they will turn out okay. The goal is godliness.


I don't want my children to be good, I want them to fear the Lord, to serve the widows and orphans, to have a heart that loves God and walks with Him in repentance and faith.




We pray a lot for and with our kids. In the past few months we have been teaching the boys to pray following ACTS model of praying: adoration, confession, thanksgiving, supplication.




I say the underlined parts and the italics are words they come up with on their own.




Adoration: God you are so...

(big, strong, mighty, you made us, you love us, you protect us)

Confession: God, I'm sorry...

(for not listening, not sharing, for hitting my brother)

Thanksgiving: Lord thank you for...

(my family, friends, our house, for forgiving us and for loving us)

Supplication: Lord help me...

(stay in my bed, help me obey my mom and help me love you more each day)




There is my snow. The tears seem to flow when I listen to my kids pray. Just like when I witnessed the snowflakes falling. This is a tough season but there is grace. There are little mercies here and there.




God is present. He is working. God is using the friends in our lives like my porch light this morning to help us see things we can't,  to remind us that this season will pass and soon there will be a harvest.




In parenting it can sometimes feel like we are staring out into the dark morning. The dark morning of nos and repeating the same directions over and over.




Search for the snow. If you can't see the beauty in the darkness find someone who has been there to shine the light and give you a little perspective.




His mercies are new every morning. He is faithful in every season.

[Judy Harder]

If You Ever Feel Called to Have a Platform
Feb 06, 2013 12:10 am | Holley Gerth




My toes slip through cool sand and find the first step of the boardwalk. It leads over a dune and onto the beach ahead. As I stand on top of it, I catch my breath. The view is breathtaking. My word sisters pause to look with me. We wrap our arms around each other's shoulders. It's good to be here together. I feel full and whole and grateful. My heart takes a snapshot of the moment.

Months later I stand on a balcony in another city, arms crossed. The view is beautiful too but I can't shake a restless frustration inside me. I think of all the expectations I feel like I have to meet, the duties I'm supposed to complete, the people I hope will like me. My world narrows and I feel alone. What if I mess up? What if I let people down? "Get it together," I whisper to myself.

What made the difference between the two?

One was a platform and the other a pedestal.

Lean and listen, friend: Even if you feel called to have a platform...run-run-run from the pedestal.

Platforms are for sharing.

Pedestals only have room for one.

Platforms are for reaching out and giving back.

Pedestals demand that we hunker down and guard our territory.

Platforms come with space to grow and find freedom.

Pedestals trap us into a life where we can never make a wrong move.

We don't mean to end up on a pedestal. Yet it's easy to find ourselves there anyway. How can you tell if that's happened? Three ways...

- You've lost the joy of what you're called to do because there's so much pressure to get it right.

- You find yourself sharing what you think others want to hear rather than what's really happening in your heart and life.

- You experience a lot of fear, worry, defensiveness and when someone else succeeds it feels like a threat.

Here's the good news: Pedestals can be expanded. You just need to add some new planks.

That happens first when you recognize where you are and that you don't want to stay there alone. Then you reach out to others and say, "Hey, let's do this together. And by the way–this is what's really going on in my life. How can I support and encourage you?"

Then you do a foundation check and say, "God, I think I may have hopped on this thing with my own effort and agenda. Will you please rebuild whatever you need to so that you are my security and source of strength?"

And, finally, when others try to remake your platform back into a pedestal (and they will–even though they don't mean to) you actively do whatever you need to avoid that happening. You speak your struggles, name your fears, own your mistakes and put your arms around the shoulders of your sisters.

Platforms build us (and others) up.

Pedestals eventually brings us down.

Let's stand tall together where we belong, sisters.

Are you with me?

–Holley Gerth, author of the new book You're Made for a God-sized Dream