Press Sec. Jay Blarney's Draft of Obuma's Speech Thursday

[Warph]

Received this draft today from Press Secretary Jay Blarney of President Obuma's speech to the Nation Thursday evening.  This speech will be recorded so he will be able to watch the Green Bay-New Orleans game.  Gee, I can hardly wait.... for the game, I mean.
....Warph   



Comrade Workers, Peasants and Welfare Recipients of America,

For years we have battled the economy, and now I am pleased to announce that the economy is finally ready to surrender.  This means that our prolonged War on the Economy has been successful, and the complete destruction of the economy is at hand.  And with these newly liberated resources from the private sector, we believe that it may actually be possible to drive unemployment down beneath 50 percent.

Throughout the long years of battling against the economy, there were many who thought that we would not prevail, that an economic recovery would somehow occur and the American people would be forced to return to their private sector jobs, instead of spending all day waiting in the unemployment line.  But under the inspired leadership of the Democratic Party, the collective organizers engaged in the people's struggle refused to accept handouts from the capitalist bosses.  Instead they remained dedicated to bringing them to their knees. And they have. The American Economy is no more.

Nationalized health care.  Cap and Trade.  Open Door Immigration . The 80 percent Redistribution Tax.  The New Constitution.  Statehood for Mexico.  And of course the atomic destruction of Ohio and Indiana to prevent them from swinging over to the reactionary forces led by the fry-cook, Hymie Sodbuster of the Counter-Revolution Army, who went up with a bang and marked the end of American Capitalism.  Today the American People live better than ever, unchained from the artificial parameters of the Standard of Living.  Over their heads waves the banner of the party which cares and provides for all party members.

Yes Comrades, I also have great news.  From this day forward the American basic economic unit will no longer be the Dollar, but the Debit.  As our annual interest on the national debt has long since surpassed our gross national product, the Debit is the people's way of repaying the great debts amassed by the party leadership on their behalf.  As there is no more gold in Fort Knox, our national debt serves as the new basis for our economy.  With each Debit you receive, you take on a greater share of the national debt and a heavier burden of taxation.  Therefore it may truly be said that in America the rich are the poorest of us all.

Yes there have been setbacks.  But the War is going gloriously.  The defeat of the economy will make the economy stronger than ever.  The War on the Economy will be truly won when the War on Employment succeeds and finally reaches the fabled 60% unemployment mark.  Something that has never been accomplished in my years as President.

Many of you cannot even begin to understand how much effort the Democratic Party and its Socialist Progressive Organizers have put into your welfare.  For four years we have battled the forces of counter-revolutionism in order to usher in a bright socialist future.  And even now when the last of the dissenters led by Teresa, her flying monkeys and her right-hand man, Jarhead Gunny of Semper Fidelis, Tenn.;  who are chipping away at their blocks of ice in the wilds of Alaska, we must remain vigilant against the plotting of those reactionaries who wish to restore an oppressive free market economy.  To uproot the freedoms we have fought so hard to impose.  To destroy the aspirations of the party and the glorious collective people's struggle.  We cannot let that happen, Comrades.

Our struggle is still not over.  Outposts of capitalism remain active around the lower 57.  Take for instance, that upstart called Elk Konnected of Elk County, Kansas.  Their competitiveness threatens to dampen our revolutionary spirit.  Who steers their Steering Committee?  Why won't they converse with us??  What are there real goals???  Those great Comrades, Ross,the keystroker; the patriot, Patriot; Steve, the bee-keeper; and Red, the Civil War historian; fighting the good fight, true SPOrganizers all.     

Yes, we must remain vigilant against outbreaks of capitalism at home.  These infestations can seem innocent at times.  Take LarryJ, the newspaper guy from California, selling homemade lemonade from a wooden crate on his front lawn.   But has he paid all his business taxes?  Has he provided health insurance for all his employees.  Has he passed his party administered business ethics exam?  Does he provide preferential service to party members and oppressed peoples?  Is he using Comrade Chavez's "Green" corn syrup, instead of the decadent sugar?  We already know the answer to these questions, because if he were doing all these things, a glass of his lemonade would cost 50 dollars, not 50 cents.

So while it may seem harsh of us to seize LarryJ and transport him behind the frozen chain link fence of the Al Franken Memorial Reeducation and Obesity Center in Minnesota, the alternative would be to return to the bad old days when there were capitalist factories with smokestacks on every corner and supermarkets with variably priced food in them, instead of our delicious free Universal Grade Government Gruel.  The lesson of the last almost three years is that we cannot let capitalism get its foot in the door of our Great Socialist Homeland again.  No, Comrades.  We must stand strong against their temptations, because a truly equal society is almost here.  A society in which all party members will be equal, regardless of race, sex or degree of transvestism.

Comrades, our glorious America today is exactly the one envisioned by Comrades Washington, Jefferson, Sharpton and Ayers, our great founding fathers, who created this country, writing, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all progressive party members were endowed with equal obligations by the party leadership, that among these are collectivism, equality, and the pursuit of the people's collective struggle."

And as the great preamble of our New Constitution reads, "The socialist system of economy and the socialist ownership of the means and instruments of production firmly established as a result of the abolition of the capitalist system of economy, the abrogation of private ownership of the means and instruments of production and the abolition of the exploitation of man by man, constitute the economic foundation of the United States" and further "The land, its natural deposits, waters, forests, mills, factories, mines, rail, water and air transport, banks, post, telegraph and telephones, farms as well as municipal enterprises and the bulk of the dwelling houses in the cities and industrial localities, are state property, that is, belong to the whole people."

This glorious consolidation of the rights of the people, under the wise leadership of the Democratic People's Congress has made America the happiest and freest of nations.

As you sip your Government Universal Grade Gruel through a straw, peering through the windows of your Census mandated temporary mobile housing unit provided by FEMA, and prepare for another hard day of toiling in the fields or collecting unemployment checks... you can be confident of looking forward to another four glorious years of the same thing.


Your Honorable & Glorious Leader,
Comrade Barack Hussein Obuma

[Patriot]

Warph, 

That was a frighteningly humorous piece of prose.  Until you hit this low note....

...Our struggle is still not over.  Outposts of capitalism remain active around the lower 57.  Take for instance, that upstart called Elk Konnected of Elk County, Kansas.  Their competitiveness threatens to dampen our revolutionary spirit.  Who steers their Steering Committee?  Why won't they converse with us??  What are there real goals???  Those great Comrades, Ross,the keystroker; the patriot, Patriot; Steve, the bee-keeper; and Red, the Civil War historian; fighting the good fight, true SPOrganizers all.     

Unless I misread, contextually you say that Elk Konnected is a capitalist organization.

Elk Konnected... A 'business' group that funds itself by regularly seeking & taking other folks money by grant and not by loan or investor (redistribution).  A group that wants government to be its' working business partner.  A group that hires professional 'community organizers' & uses the well documented Delphi Technique to stifle open debate and then 'lead' (read: influence government) by questionable consensus opinion (Fabian socialist tactics). A group that has staff members in elected and non elected government office to do its bidding.   A group that has, at its' core, a policy of constantly influencing the youth and involve itself and influence the local government school systems all the while being embedded in government (ala Communist Manifesto).   And on, and on.  If it walks like a duck....

Elk Konnected... capitalist?  Elk Konnected... in opposition to the socialist agenda?  I think not.  Competitive?  Combative perhaps.

And to castigate the positions of Ross, Steve, Red and myself (unless your style was a parody in the form of inverse absurdity), painting us as complicit in the desire to root out opposition to socialism in Obama's service, is a total inversion of reality... not to mention a tad insulting.

Warph... you seem, at least in some part, unable to recognize socialist tendencies at work below the federal level.  Your misconceptions are evident... and disappointing... notwithstanding your wit in prose.

[Warph]

Your opinion is ...er.... well stated, Patriot.  May I say I immediately had certain voluble and loquaciousness thoughts spring to my mind eye about your opinion.  Let me explain.  Overall, the greatest satisfaction and insight that I get from lifes absurdities is the sense that I'm not the only one out there who has a low tolerance for bullshit.  I have a knack that looks at many aspects of life that conspire to grind us down and take away our intrinsic value as humans.  Those of us who generally point these things out are labelled "cranks".... at times I've even been called recalcitrant... which I think is going beyond the pail.... but again, I feel that this  in fact, might be a good thing to be when it involves the "wonderland" of absurd and ludicrous politics.  For many years I wallowed... or for a better word, wallered... around in the muck of wonderland politics with the government.  In order to cope with this I took on the genre of literary nonsense over the many years I was with State, for when you've been "down the rabbit hole" as many times as I have with our government, one tends to look at things in a rather humorous way with overtones of a incongruous and campy look on todays very laughable politics.  Now, I surely didn't mean to psychologically castrate anyone in this thread but the annointed one, Obuma.  As for Ross, Steve and Red, I believe that they can identify with what I'm saying.  All three have humor and wit when expressing their opinions.  You, I wonder about.  My motto has always been, "If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all."  You need to lighten up.  Your shorts are wound too tight my friend.

And as far as the Duck is concerned, please refer to:

http://hubpages.com/hub/Anatidaephobia-The-Fear-of-Being-Watched-by-a-Duck

Sometimes the Duck has alot to say if only one were to listen.

[/font]

[Anmar]

Warph, 

That was a frighteningly humorous piece of prose.  Until you hit this low note....

Unless I misread, contextually you say that Elk Konnected is a capitalist organization.

Elk Konnected... A 'business' group that funds itself by regularly seeking & taking other folks money by grant and not by loan or investor (redistribution).  A group that wants government to be its' working business partner.  A group that hires professional 'community organizers' & uses the well documented Delphi Technique to stifle open debate and then 'lead' (read: influence government) by questionable consensus opinion (Fabian socialist tactics). A group that has staff members in elected and non elected government office to do its bidding.   A group that has, at its' core, a policy of constantly influencing the youth and involve itself and influence the local government school systems all the while being embedded in government (ala Communist Manifesto).   And on, and on.  If it walks like a duck....

Elk Konnected... capitalist?  Elk Konnected... in opposition to the socialist agenda?  I think not.  Competitive?  Combative perhaps.

And to castigate the positions of Ross, Steve, Red and myself (unless your style was a parody in the form of inverse absurdity), painting us as complicit in the desire to root out opposition to socialism in Obama's service, is a total inversion of reality... not to mention a tad insulting.

Warph... you seem, at least in some part, unable to recognize socialist tendencies at work below the federal level.  Your misconceptions are evident... and disappointing... notwithstanding your wit in prose.

I'm gonna vote for the joke.  I don't like warph much, but even I can appreciate his humor.  Don't run around talking about everyone else if you're going to be so thin skinned every time someone say something about you.

[Warph]

Well kudos, Anmar... the feeling is mutual and you can be pretty witty yourself at times when you let yourself.  Did you know that Kudos also means tissue in finnish. 

BTW, things are going to be pretty busy shortly between Israel and the Palestanians, the UN and USA.  How do you think its gonna go?  Just curious.

[Anmar]

Well kudos, Anmar... the feeling is mutual and you can be pretty witty yourself at times when you let yourself.  Did you know that Kudos also means tissue in finnish. 

BTW, things are going to be pretty busy shortly between Israel and the Palestanians, the UN and USA.  How do you think its gonna go?  Just curious.

Just read an article that the EU is trying to propose an alternative resolution that recognizes both states, Israel, and Palestine.  They both have rights to exist, defend themselves, blah blah.  We both know nothing will get through the security council because of the US veto.  I read a quote from someone saying that its all just a political sideshow and I think I'm going to agree with that.  Its just really another letdown from Obama, because not only did he not follow through on his promise, he's lost America's credibility at the negotiating table.  Frankly, America was never neutral in the negotiations, but we carried significant political power on all sides.   Combined with the Arab spring, and the emergence of the EU as a larger player, our loss of credibility really hurts our ability to reach a peaceful solution.

My ideal solution at this point is unchanged,  one country, its capital in jerusalem.  One person, one vote.  Right of return for Palestinians living in occupied territories, Jordan, syria, egypt, and Lebanon.  A constitution that guarantees religious freedom  (and access) to everyone, Christian, Muslim and Jew.