QUESTIONS THAT HAUNT ME!
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If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
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Can you cry under water?
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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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What disease did cured ham actually have?
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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
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Do you ever wonder why Teresa and Kjell let me become a member of this forum?
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I know the answer to the last one...BECAUSE THEY HAD TO...If Momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy! lol ;D
For the skinny on why Jimmy cracks corn see
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1288/who-is-jimmy-and-why-does-he-crack-corn
Jo, you made me smile this morning.
What a way to start the day ... and week.
I think Rudy provided the answer to the last question!!
I know this isn't the proper place to ask...but Jo, how is Fred doing?
Thank you for asking -- he is really doing well -- he has an appointment with the urologist next Wednesday for the prostate procedure and then I think we are GOOD TO GO !!
We have given the ole boy a top to bottom renovation and the Dr's are pleased and that is good enough for us.
( Whispering) since Teresa and Kjell are out of town, we can do this on this thread. tee hee