Just little short ones please.
When spoken it's broken. What is it?
Silence?
When life hands you melons, you may be dyslexic...... ;D
Lisa
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
A stick.
Lisa
Wilma, you broke it ! ;D ;D
Yup! That's it. Good ones folks, how about more?
It travels around the world, but sits in a corner? What is it?
A globe?
Quote from: Diane Amberg on December 17, 2012, 02:02:31 PM
It travels around the world, but sits in a corner? What is it?
Warph.
Ha! No, it's a good one for this season. Try again.
Sits in one corner? Well, most of the time.
More likely than not, it is adhered and can't move. And no one has any respect for it either; tossing it around all the time but it stays in the corner.
It sits in a corner, but travels around the world.
I am sitting in a corner at my computer. There are many things on my computer, including E-mail. E-mail travels around the world. Is it me? My computer? Or maybe my E-mail?
But you haven't been cancelled, Wilma. Someone just might cancel this joke, too.
Wilma, I hate to break it to you.....sit down....
It's you. ;D
ready
Un timbre.... qui s'assied dans le coin droite supérieur d'une enveloppe.
In the movie 'Rise of the Planet of the Apes,' not only do the apes take over, but they actually do a much better job with the debt crisis than Obuma."
How about in English please Warph? Timbre-poste? Wilma, wacha think? ;)
Wilma might even collect them--before or after cancellation.
All right, you guys. It took a while, but---postage stamps. So there.
Yay! :D :D :D
HUZZAH!!!! I'm glad someone got it, cause it was driving me CRAZY!!!
Lisa
OK... for you computer buffs... how many programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
What has more lives than a cat?
NONE!!! That's a hardware problem!! ;D
Lisa
Good Lisa! Now the other is a classic third grade joke...
A frog has more lives than a cat because it croaks every night. ;D
Really BAD joke..... ;D
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D Why is a battery better than Ross?
Because it runs down and quits?
Not going there!
I shouldn't go there either, but after his recent remarks I just can't help my self. ;)
Batteries are better than Ross because they always have a positive end. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
What a hypocrite you are. ::)
I lost the battle for civility long ago..even asked nicely and begged and was told to bug off. So if acting rough and being hypocritical is the rule of the day...OK, I'll play. Ya can't hold me to rules that apparently don't apply to you. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
A lame excuse for a personal attack.
I guess you ran out of real jokes.
What was the 2004 Guiness books " dullest" state?
Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of Delaware?
They knew they had an unlimited supply of crash test dummies just down the road. 8)
HA! Actually there is a big medical research facility building on the old Chrysler site,which UD bought. Same joke with medical research subjects. It's already made the rounds here. As far as a personal attack?...just look in the mirror Bub...three of you co wrote the book on insults, humiliation attempts, and personal attacks. ;D
I hear it sold three copies. yuk,yuk.
Did you hear that the governors mansion burned down in Delaware?
Almost took out the whole trailer park.
The only Gov I recall living in a trailer in recent memory would be Mike Huckabee:
http://articles.latimes.com/2000/jul/19/news/mn-55365
HA! ;D ;D ;D ;D I've heard the Kansas Governor lives in a barn just outside Topeka. They have water from a pump and pipe in the Kansas River and get fresh milk from the lower level, twice a day. They have a big entertainment room, but have to move the chickens off the grain sacks and hay bales so they can sit down to watch the football game on TV. ;D ;D ;D
You are so predictable.
By the way, I wish that were true. It's how all politicians should live, but without TV.
I'm predictable? So? I assume you know about the latest on Andy Reid? Ya just can't get away from us east coasters...better get used to it! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Again you stray from the topic. As I said before, you evidently have no more jokes.
I was hoping others would join in... ya don't think Andy with the Chiefs isn't a joke? ;D
I think the others will join in when you get back to real jokes.
BTW, I have always been a Bears fan. Walter Payton never ran to the sideline, he ran over people, and I believe only missed one game in his career.
Did you happen to see anything about the guy from Jersey get into a fight in a Florida Subway because he wanted ketchup on his Philly cheesesteak ?
No, I missed that one. Ketchup is always traditional on a "real' Philly cheese steak. So is Cheese Whiz, but I prefer provolone on mine.
Quote from: Bullwinkle on January 05, 2013, 09:21:30 AM
BTW, I have always been a Bears fan. Walter Payton never ran to the sideline, he ran over people, and I believe only missed one game in his career.
Did you happen to see anything about the guy from Jersey get into a fight in a Florida Subway because he wanted ketchup on his Philly cheesesteak ?
I'm a Bears fan. Lived in Chicago-area for 2 years. Walter Payton was terrific - nice guy. "Sweetness!"
Heard the Subway / ketchup story. Both men over-reacted. Made me realize, i've never seen (nor asked) for ketchup at Subway. Never thought about it.
Talk about silly fights. :)
I'm a day late with this one and it's not really a joke, but funny none the less...I think.... why was yesterday's date important to Marty Mcfly?