Elk County Forum

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How stupid is this? ???


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A Dec. 19, 2008 shows Hannah the Mermaid in the Mermaid
Lagoon exhibit at Sydney Aquarium.


The Body of a Mermaid Found on the Beach:


Discovery Channel aired Mermaids: The Body Found last night and it seems it got a lot of people (No. 1 on Google Trends) wondering if the mythical sea creatures could be real, particularly thanks to a scene showing a boy finding a freaky creature on the beach.

If it seemed more horror story than science documentary, that's because the clip is not real, folks.

In describing the show, Discovery says, "What if there's a kernel of truth behind the legend of this mythic creature? Is the idea of mermaids really so far-fetched? Maybe so, maybe not. The show itself, though science fiction, is based on some real events and scientific theory."

Scientific theory means it's staged.

The two-hour special aired on Animal Planet in May and admitted to using an actor to "discover" the body. The program aired first in Australia, where it was originally debunked.

But just in case you're still not convinced, the Department of Commerce's National Oceanic and Atmospheric Organization, put a statement on its website a few weeks ago saying, "No evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found."[/font][/size]

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They Walk Among Us! 

....No explanation needed...!





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Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.' For three days the fridge sat there without anyone looking twice. He eventually decided that people were too mistrustful of this deal. So he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.'

The next day someone stole it!

They walk among us!


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*One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted... 'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and said...'where?'

They walk among us!


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While looking at a house, my brother asked the estate agent which direction was north because he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?' My brother explained that the sun rises in the east and has for sometime. She shook her head and said, 'Oh, I don't keep up with all that stuff...'

They Walk Among Us!


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My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard an admin girl talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but said she 'didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving'.

They Walk Among Us!


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A man drove around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed.Now he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even slower as he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed. He tried a fourth time with the same result. He did this a fifth time and was now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past, this time at a snail's pace...

Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for driving without a seat belt.

You can't fix stupid.


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My sister-in-law has a lifesaving tool in her car which is designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the car trunk.

They Walk Among Us!



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I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area and went to the lost luggage office and reported the loss. The woman there smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and said I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me, 'has your plane arrived yet?'...

(I work with professionals like this.)

They Walk Among Us!



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While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time then said 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.

They Walk Among Us!


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And last, but not least:

Dumb as a box of Rocks TRUE STORY:

A noted psychiatrist was a guest speaker at an academic function where Nancy Pelosi happened to appear. Ms Pelosi took the opportunity to schmooze the good doctor a bit and asked him a question with which he was most at ease.

'Would you mind telling me, Doctor,' she asked, 'how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?' 'Nothing is easier,' he replied. 'You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If the person hesitates, that puts you on the track..'

'What sort of question?' asked Pelosi.

Well, you might ask, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?''

Pelosi thought a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, 'You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history.'

Sadly, they walk among us!

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Now that really is funny! We had two large capacity vans head on one time though with almost that many injured.

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A Korean model and singer who became addicted to plastic surgery has now done irreversible damage to her face after she took measures into her own hands when doctors refused to perform any more surgery.

[Before & After Photos at:]

http://bossip.com/770356/daaaaayyyuum-korean-model-mangles-her-face-by-injecting-it-with-cooking-oil-after-doctors-refused-to-do-plastic-surgery-before-after-photos/

A former Korean model addicted to plastic surgery injected cooking oil into her face when doctors refused to perform any more cosmetic operations on her.

Hang Mioku, now about 50 years old, has been left with a badly disfigured face following her desperate attempt to attain softer and smoother skin.

Mioku had her first plastic surgery when she was 28 years old, and soon became obsessed. She moved to Japan to pursue her career and underwent several more bouts of surgery, Mail Online reports.
However, after undergoing repeated operations to enhance her looks, doctors refused to provide her with any more silicone injections when her face became noticeably enlarged.

A desperate Mioku then injected an entire bottle of black market silicone into her face and finally decided to inject cooking oil, leaving her cheeks and forehead severely swollen and scarred.

Following the do-it-yourself beauty treatment, Mioku was left so disfigured that her own parents could not recognize her. When doctors analysed her, it was confirmed she was suffering from a psychological disorder.

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Ahem! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

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"The Chameleon Love Lizard"
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WASHINGTON — Millions of Americans were in a state of shock this past week after learning that Congress had accomplished something fifty years ago.

Although the incident was widely reported throughout the week, the revelation that Congress had achieved something positive and substantial for the country a half century ago left many incredulous and baffled.

Adding to their disbelief were reports that the accomplishment came as the result of collaboration between a Democrat in the White House and Republicans in Congress.

Making the scenario even more far-fetched, politicians of both parties came to an agreement without the interference of corporate paymasters operating them like puppets.

Tracy Klugian, thirty-four, was one of many Americans who found "the whole thing hard to swallow."

"I searched for it on Google, and it's true: Congress did actually get something done for the good of the country and all," he said. "Still, when I first heard about it, it sounded like a hoax."

MENLO PARK, CA — One day after Google outbid Facebook for a manufacturer of solar-powered drones, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg served warning that his company was prepared to blow Google's drones out of the skies.

At a presentation for Facebook employees at the company's headquarters in Menlo Park, Zuckerberg announced plans to build a $24 billion Facebook laser shield, a global network of satellites capable of identifying and incinerating Google drones in midair.

Zuckerberg delighted his audience with a brief animated demonstration showing a Facebook satellite locking in on a Google drone and obliterating it with a green laser.

"Unfriended, bitch," said Zuckerberg, to a roaring ovation from his employees.

Within an hour, Google responded with a stern warning of is own, vowing, "Any act of aggression against Google drones will not stand."

To that end, the company announced that it was prepared to shoot down Facebook's laser satellites with a long-range super cannon called Google Gun.  

Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills.


A man in Johannesberg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other's head.


A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety record showed its workers a film aimed at encouraging the use of safety goggles on the job.  According to Industrial Machinery News, the film's depiction of gory industrial accidents was so graphic that twenty-five workers suffered minor injuries in their rush to leave the screening room.  Thirteen others fainted, and one man required seven stitches after he cut his head falling off a chair while watching the film.



The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating one within city limits.


A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis, but by the time police arrived on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.


Swedish business consultant Ulf af Trolle labored 13 years on a book about Swedish economic solutions.  He took the 250-page manuscript to be copied, only to have it reduced to 50,000 strips of paper in seconds when a worker confused the copier with the shredder.


A convict broke out of jail in Washington D.C., then a few days later accompanied his girlfriend to her trial for robbery.  At lunch, he went out for a sandwich.  She needed to see him, and thus had him paged.  Police officers recognized his name and arrested him as he returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen over the lunch hour.


Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine.  The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.  Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.


When two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan, refused to hand over the cash to an intoxicated robber, the man threatened to call the police.  They still refused, so the robber called the police and was arrested.


A Los Angeles man who later said he was "tired of walking," stole a steamroller and led police on a 5 mph chase until an officer stepped aboard and brought the vehicle to a stop.


A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor asked.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouted, "this is her husband!"

Published on Mar 14, 2014 - "Ronald Reagan once famously wondered what would happen if the world were presented with the prospect of an alien invasion. It was Reagan's belief that humanity would be able to put aside all of their differences and come together to oppose such a common threat. We may soon see if he was correct.

"If the accomplishments of the Obama administration can be summed up in three words, those words would be failure, scandal, and treason. The president and his toadies had to repeatedly lie to the people of the United States in order to pass the massive fail known as Obamacare, they have been lying to the American people and stonewalling Congress over what really happened in Benghazi for the last 18 months, and they are currently lying and/or pleading the fifth over the IRS's targeting of Tea Party groups. Let's not forget "Operation Fast and Furious," NSA spying on American citizens, the targeting of journalists, unconstitutional recess appointments, illegal military actions in Libya, and the unconstitutional and extrajudicial killings of Anwar al-Alawki, Samir Khan, and al-Alawki's 16-year-old son Abdulrahman who was killed in the CIA drone strike two weeks after his father for no particular reason.

"Talk of impeachment is rampant in the halls of Congress, ordinary Americans are waking up all across the country; and they are angry. Even liberals are beginning to see the dangers posed by Barack Obama. Liberal constitutional law professor Jonathan Turley says that the United States is in a "constitutional crisis," and the ACLU has called Obama "judge, jury and executioner."

"The last time there were anti-Obama protests in Washington DC, 1.8 million bikers roared through the town and patriots tore down the "Barrycades" that were preventing the nation's heroes from reaching their monuments; the ones that they earned with their sweat, their devotion to country, and their blood. When protesters started marching towards the White House Obama got into Marine One and fled the nation's capital. On May 16th millions of Americans are set to converge in Washington DC for Operation American Spring, and Obama can see the handwriting on the wall. He desperately needs a win to avoid impeachment and conviction by the Senate for high crimes and misdemeanors against the people of the United States.

"According to former CIA spy Dr. Jim Garrow, Obama intends to quash all of the scandals plaguing his administration by announcing to the world that humanity has been in contact with extraterrestrials, and that he (Obama) has been selected to speak for humanity. Garrow says that this announcement will be timed to come after an imminent currency collapse orchestrated by Russia and China in a secret deal approved by Obama, who has not given up on his plans to wipe out up to 300 million Americans with an electromagnetic pulse - a triple threat from a POTUS known to double-down when his back is against the wall.

"An EMP would send the US back to the 1800's without the infrastructure to support 314 million people. Overnight those people would be too busy trying to stay alive, too busy fighting hunger and disease to fight the absolute tyranny Obama and his masters seek to impose on the United States. With the nation crippled after attacks from numerous vectors, including terrorist attacks within the US perpetrated by Chinese, North Korean, and Iranian terrorists, Obama intends to complete his stranglehold on the country by asking for UN forces to keep the peace and suppress dissent. The irony is that those forces will be made up largely of our communist and Muslim enemies. I suppose we'll be busy fighting them too.

"Obama's plan to set off an EMP last fall was thwarted by three brave flag and general officers of the United States military, men in charge of our nuclear security, who were subsequently fired from their positions when they refused to give Obama access to those weapons. According to Dr. Garrow, one of the weapons Obama tried to steal was detonated at sea in the Atlantic Ocean causing a 2.2 magnitude earthquake that was verified by the US Geological Survey. Two more weapons are still under the control of patriotic members of the United States military. This exciting episode is one that you do not want to miss." :P :P ::)

Reported on Forbes.com that "Tall Whites" aliens control the US and have been since the 1940's. Information surfaces as NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden is still on asylum in Russia. Claims are that Snowden leaked this jaw dropping information. If you believe this or not, I think it should raise an eyebrow as Iran is up to "something".  http://www.forbes.com/sites/michaelpeck/2014/01/13/iran-says-tall-white-space-aliens-control-america/