The Guys at the 19th Hole are really P*$$#d

Started by Warph, November 05, 2009, 01:55:10 AM

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Warph

The mother of all Sin-Tax's is about to hit the 19th Hole!  The guys are really upset, to put it mildly.  Slappy is crying in his beer while writing his congressman.  Tebbi's threatening to move back to india.  Snerdly Evans has been hyperventilating since he heard the news.  

This is a hell of a shot to the beer gut :'( :  Government bodies across America are looking to increase taxes on beer.  

According to ABC News, states from Connecticut to Arkansas to Oregon to Wherever, have been "eyeing higher taxes on cigarettes and booze" to make up for budget shortfalls caused by the recession.

Now, I'm not against paying taxes to fund some... that's some... government programs.  I like driving around on the wide-open highways that my tax contributions helped build.  I'm grateful for the government-backed loans that got me through my beer-slugging days at Georgetown U. (I graduated with a 1.2 ... blood-alcohol level).

I'm happy for the government agencies that protect our country, track down criminals across state lines and make sure our food and water are safe.... well, sometimes safe.  But higher taxes on beer?  Give me a BREAK!  Why not increase taxes on hot dogs and apple pie while we're at it?  Congress cracked open this Pandora's beer can in 1991 -- when it doubled the federal beer tax to $18 a barrel.... (thanks wikipedia).  Many states have long been on the beer wagon.  In 1936, Pennsylvania levied a "temporary" 10-percent alcohol tax to relieve victims of that year's Johnstown flood.  Flood victims still aren't relieved.... not only is the tax still in effect, it has been increased to 18 percent.  

But WHY us?  I take such taxes personally.  Who came up with this sin-tax on my beer, anyway.  I suspect Rahm Emanuel has something to do with this.  That BUM needs to go!  Hell...my great-grandmother took the edge off Prohibition by installing a distillery in her basement and making beer in her bath tub.  My grandfather helped his Kansas community survive the Depression by investing generously in local watering holes.  My father survived the Carter administration by drinking ice-cold Pabst Blue Ribbon on the back porch with our neighbor, Mr. Whos'he.

It is simply un-American to tax beer.  And it won't do much good in any event.

According to records from the U.S. Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau, says ABC News, the 1991 federal beer tax "created a slight bump in revenues in 1992, followed by four years of decline, from nearly $3.9 billion to $3.6 billion."  What's that, you say?  Higher taxes lead to lower revenues?  Man, is government screwed up!

In my opinion, beer does our society good -- particularly in the midst of a nasty global downturn.  By looking forward to a happy-hour respite each Friday, aren't workers more productive during the week?  Isn't their productivity a needed boost to our ailing economy?  Moderate beer consumption can reduce one's chances of heart and vascular disease -- is not beer essential to reducing our health care costs?  I'm counting on beer consumption to solve America's long-term liabilities.

Consider this... Beer causes people to think others are more attractive than they really are and to marry and procreate – I need people marrying and producing kids so they can fund my Social Security payments.

It isn't the fault of beer drinkers that government bodies across America spent like drunken sailors when the economy was booming.... it's not our fault they didn't plan ahead.  It will do nobody any good to make up their shortfall by taxing beer.  If governments really want to raise funds, why not tax the avarice and stupidity that caused our markets to expand and crash?

Hey... I have a great idea.  Why not tax government expansion?   Such taxes would produce a windfall -- at the same time they would curb truly "sinful" behavior.

I'll raise my mug to that.  Cheers!
"Every once in a while I just have a compelling need to shoot my mouth off." 
--Warph

"If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all."
-- Warph

"A gun is like a parachute.  If you need one, and don't have one, you'll probably never need one again."

pamsback



Actual site.....links to Senators, Reps and petitions!

larryJ

I was going to suggest having a "Boston Beer Party", you know, taking all the beer off the truck and pouring it all out into the desert.  Then it hit me---------------------------------------------------


WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?--------------------------------

So, I guess there is just another reason to "cry in your beer."

Larryj
HELP!  I'm talking and I can't shut up!

I came...  I saw...  I had NO idea what was going on...

Tobina+1

Who's to say that cigs and beer are the only "sin" items?  How about chocolate, asparagus, and oysters?  I still contend that legalizing drugs and taxing the heck out of them would resolve the country's deficit in a much faster time... but that's a previous thread from long, long ago...

Anmar

There is actually a very good chance that marijuana will be legalized next year in CA.  Maybe we'll be exempt from the beer tax!
"The chief source of problems is solutions"

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