another slice of wry

[larryJ]

Today's------funny......

A local business was looking to hire and put up a sign stating:  "Help wanted.  Must have computer skills.  Must be bilingual.  We are an equal opportunity employer."

A dog trots in and starts barking and gesturing toward the sign.  The manage laughs and says, "I'm sorry, doggy, I can't hire you.  The sign says you have to have computer skills."

The dog goes over to a computer, logs on and starts running a complicated program.

The manager says, "Wow, that's impressive.  But I can't hire a dog."

The dog goes back to the sign and points to the line that says, "We are an equal opportunity employer."

The manager says, "Yes, but the sign also says you have to be bilingual."

The dog looks at the manager and says, "Meow."

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In 1853, Cincinnati, Ohio, established a fire department made up of paid city employees.

In 1912, the city of Branson, Misssouri, was incorporated.

In 1945, American forces launched the amphibious invasion of Okinawa during World War II.

In 1962, the Katherine Anne Porter novel, "Ship of Fools," a allegory about the rise of Nazism in Germany, was published by Little, Brown and Co. on April Fool's Day.

In 1963, New York City's daily newspapers resumed publishing after settlement was reached in a 114-day strike.

In 1963, the daytime drama "General Hospital" premiered on ABC-TV.

In 1972, the first Major League Baseball players' strike began; it lasted 12 days.

In 1976, Apple Computer was founded by Steve Jobs, Steve Wozniak and Ronald Wayne.

In 1984, recording star Marvin Gaye was shot to death by his father, Marvin Gay Sr. in Los Angeles, the day before his 45th birthday.  (The elder Gay pleaded guilty to voluntary manslaughter, and received probation.)

In 1992, the National Hockey League Players' Association went on its first-ever strike, which lasted 10 days.

In 2003, American troops entered a hospital in Nasiriyah, Iraq, and rescued Army Pfc. Jessica Lynch, who'd been held prisoner since her unit was ambushed on March 23.

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Today--------Actress Jane Powell is 85, Actress Grace Lee Whitney is 83, Actress Debbie Reynolds is 81, Country singer Jim Ed Brown is 79, Actor Don Hastings is 79, Actress Ali MacGraw is 75, Rhythm-and-blues singer Rudolph Isley is 74, Reggae singer Jimmy Cliff is 65, Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito is 63, Rock musician Billy Currie (Ultravox) is 63, Actress Annette O'Toole is 61 and Movie director Barry Sonnenfeld is 60.

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April 1st is:  April Fool's Day, Atheist Day, Boomer Bonus Day, International Tatting Day, Library Snap Shot Day, Myles Day, Natiional Fun Day, Poetry And The Creative Mind Day, Reading Is Funny Day, Sorry Charlie Day, St. Stupid Day, Tater Day and U.S. Air Force Academy Day.

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Quip for the day......When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle.  It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's------------heard these?  See #10.....

Being elderly has its advantages......

1.  In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
2.  People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
3.  There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
4.  You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
5.  Things you buy now are less likely to wear out.
6.  You don't have to hold in your stomach when you walk out in public.
7.  Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
8.  Your joints can predict the weather better than the TV meteorologists.
9.  Your supply of brain cells is down to a manageable number.
10. Even if you have heard these jokes before, they seem brand-new.

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In 1792, Congress passed the Coinage Act, which authorized establishment of the U.S. Mint.

In 1912, the just-completed RMS Titanic left Belfast to begin its sea trials eight days before the start of its ill-fated maiden voyage.

In 1917, President Woodrow Wilson asked Congress to declare war against Germany saying, "The world must be made safe for democracy."  (Congress declared war four days later.)

In 1932, aviator Charles A. Lindbergh and John F. Condon went to a cemetery in the The Bronx, N.Y., where Condon turned over $50,000 to a man in exchange for Lindbergh's kidnapped son.  (The child, who was not returned, was found dead the following month.)

In 1942, Glenn Miller and his orchestra recorded "American Patrol" at the RCA Victor studios in Hollywood.

In 1956, the soap operas "As the World Turns" and "The Edge of Night" premiered on CBS-TV.

In 1968, the science-fiction film "2001:  A Space Odyssey," produced and directed by Stanley Kubrick, had its world premiere in Washington, D.C.

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Today-----Actrress Rita Gam is 85, Actress Sharon Acker is 78, Singer Leon Russell is 71, Jazz musician Larry Coryell is 70, Singer Emmylou Harris is 66, Social critic and author Camille Paglia is 66, Actress Pamela Reed is 64, Rock musician Dave Robinson (The Cars) is 60 and Actress Linda Hunt is 68.

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April 2nd is:  International Children's Book Day, National Love Your Produce Manager Day, National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day, Reconciliation Day and World Autism Day.

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Quip for the day........I have trouble remembering simple words like......uh........

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's----------yep............

An Arab sheik needed blood transfusions, but he had a rare blood type.  An urgent call was put out to the community.  A Scotsman responded and willingly donated his blood, which was exactly the right kind.

The sheik, after he recovered, rewarded the Scotsman with a luxury car, cash and jewelry.

Some time later, the sheik needed more blood.  Again, the Scotsman volunteered.  Afterward, the sheik sent him a card and a box of chocolates.

The Scotsman called and said, "I'm grateful for the card and the chocolates, but your first gifts were so much more lavish."

The sheik replied, "Aye, laddie, but now you see I have Scottish blood in my veins!"

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In 1776, George Washington received an honorary Doctor of Laws degree from Harvard College.

In 1860, the legendary Pony Express began carrying mail between St. Joseph, Mo., and Sacramento.  (The delivery system lasted only 18 months before giving way to the transcontinental telegraph.

In 1882, outlaw Jesse James was shot to death in St. Joseph, Mo., by Robert Ford, a member of James' gang.

In 1936, Bruno Hauptmann was electrocuted in Trenton, N.J. for the kidnap-murder of Charles Lindbergh Jr.

In 1948, President Truman signed the Marshall Plan, designed to help European allies rebuild after World War II and resist communism.

In 1968, the day before he was assassinated in Memphis, Tennessee, civil rights leader Martin Luther King Jr. delivered his famous "mountaintop" speech to a rally of striking sanitation workers.

In 1973, the first handheld portable telephone was demonstrated for reporters on a New York City street corner as Motorola executive Martin Cooper contacted Joel S. Engel of Bell Labs using a Motorola  device that, according to an AP story, looked like "a small domesticated version of military walkie-talkies" and weighed less than three pounds.

In 1996, an Air Force jetliner carrying Commerce Secretary Ron Brown and American business executives crashed in Croatia, killing all 35 people aboard.

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Today---------Actress-singer Doris Day is 90, Conservationist Dame Jane Goodall is 79, Actor William Gaunt is 76, Actor Eric Braeden is 72, Actress Marsha Mason is 71, Singer Wayne Newton is 71, Singer Billy Joe Royal is 71, Singer Tony Orlando is 69, Comedy writer Pat Proft is 66, Folk rock singer Richard Thompson is 64 and Country singer Curtis Stone is 63.

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April 3rd is:  Find A Rainbow Day, Pony Express Day, Tweed Day, Weed Of Hate:  Sow The Seeds Of Greatness Day, World Grain Sampling Day, World Party Day, National Day Of Hope, National Walking Day and Paraprofessional Appreciation Day.

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Quip for the day........If you can't read this.............you're illiterate.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's--------oh no!........

These two dumb guys drove to the store.  Afterward, when they returned to the car, the driver patted his pockets and said, "Oh, no!  I've lost my keys!"

The other guy said, "Oh, no! They're locked in the car.  I can see them hanging in the ignition."

The driver said, "Oh, no!"

The other guy said, "Let me try to pick the door lock."

He worked at it for awhile, but made no progress.

Suddenly the driver said, "Oh, no!  Hurry up!  It's starting to rain and the top is down!"

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In 1818, Congress decided the flag of the United States would consist of 13 red and white stripes and 20 stars, with a new star to be added for every new state of the Union.

In 1841, President William Henry Harrison succumbed to pneumonia one month after his inaugural, becoming the first U.S. chief executive to die in office.

In 1850, the city of Los Angeles was incorporated.

In 1859, "Dixie" was performed publicly for the first time by Bryant's Minstrels at Mechanics' Hall in New York.

In 1933, the Navy airship USS Akron crashed in severe weather off the New Jersey coast with the loss of 73 lives.

In 1949, 12 nations, including the United States, signed the North Atlantic Treaty in Washington, D.C.

In 1960, Elvis Presley recorded "Are You Lonesome Tonight?" in Nashville for RCA Victor.

In 1968, civil rights leader Martin Luther King Jr. was shot to death as he stood on a balcony of the Lorraine Motel in Memphis, Tenn.  (James Earl Ray later pleaded guilty to assassinating King, then spent the rest of his life claiming he'd been the victim of a setup.)

In 1973, the twin towers of New York's World Trade Center were officially dedicated.

In 1983, the space shuttle Challenger roared into orbit on its maiden voyage.  (It was destroyed in the disaster of January 1986.)

In 1988, the Arizona Senate convicted Gov. Evan Mecham of two charges of official misconduct, and removed him from office.  (Mecham was the first U.S. governor to be impeached and removed from office in nearly six decades.)

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Today---------Actress Elizabeth Wilson is 92, Author-poet Maya Angelou is 85, Recording executive Clive Davis is 81, Bandleader Hugh Masekela is 74, Author Kitty Kelley is 71, Actor Walter Charles is 68, Actress Christine Lahti is 63 and Country singer Steve Gatlin is 62.

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April 4th is:  International Day For Mine Awareness and Assistance On Mine Action, Square Root Day, Victims Of Violence Wholly Day, Vitamin C Day, World Rat Day and National D.A.R.E Day.

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Quip for the day.........Age is a question of mind over matter.  If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's--------this is true.........

THINGS YOU WOULDN'T KNOW WITHOUT MOVIES:

1.  It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.
2.  A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
3.  If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone else will join in, and they will know all the steps.
4.  Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications systems of any invading alien civilization.
5.  It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts.  Your enemies will wait patiently to attack you     one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner while you disable them one at a time.
6.  Police departments apparently give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assiagned a partner who is their total opposite.
7.  When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
8.  Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paperclip in seconds.

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In 1614, Pocohontas, daughter of the leader of the Powhatan tribe, married English colonist John Rolfe in Virginia.  (A convert to Christianity, she went by the name Lady Rebecca.)

In 1621, the Mayflower sailed from Plymouth Colony in present-day Massachusetts on a monthlong return trip to England.

In 1792, President George Washington cast his first veto, rejecting a congressional measure for apportioning representatives among the states.

In 1887, in Tuscumbia, Alabama, Anne Sullivan acheived a breakthrough as her blind and deaf pupil, Helen Keller, learned the meaning of the word "water" as spelled out in the Manual Alphabet.

In 1933, President Franklin D. Roosevelt signed an executive order creating the Civilian Conservation Corps and an anti-hoarding order that effectively prohibited private ownership of gold.

In 1951, Julius and Ethel Rosenberg were sentenced to death following their conviction in New York on charges of conspiring to commit espionage for the Soviet Union.

In 1964, Army Gen. Douglas MacArthur died in Washington at age 84.

In 1976, reclusive billionaire Howard Hughes died in Houston at age 70.

In 1987, Fox Broadcasting Co. made its prime-time TV debut by airing a total of three times the premiere episode of "Married -- With Children" followed by "The Tracy Ullman Show."

In 2008, actor Charelton Heston, big-screen hero and later leader of the National Rifle Association, died at age 84.

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Today---------Movie producer Roger Corman is 87, Country music producer Cowboy Jack Clement is 82, Country singer Tommy Cash is 73, Actor Michael Moriarty is 72, Pop singer Allan Clarke (The Hollies) is 71, Writer-director Peter Greenaway is 71, Actor Max Gail is 70, Actress Jane Asher is 67, Singer Agnetha Faltskog (ABBA) is 63, Actor Mitch Pileggi is 61 and Former Secretary of State Colin Powell is 76.

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April 5th is: National Deep Dish Pizza Day, Hospital Admitting Clerks Day and National Walk To Work Day.

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Quip for the day......Life is like a donut.............you're either in the dough or in the hole.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's------punny........groaner.....

Steven Spielberg is discussing his new historical drama about the lives of famous music composers.  Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger have been signed to star in the movie.  They are present in the room.

"Whom do want to play?" Spielberg asks Bruce Willis.

"I've always been a big fan of Chopin," Bruce says.  "I'll play him."

"And you, Sylvester?" Spielberg asks.

"Mozart's the one for me," Sly answers.

"And what about you," Spielberg asks Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Arnie says, firmly, "I'll be Bach!"

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In 1830, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints was organized by Joseph Smith in Fayette, NY.

In 1862, the Civil War Battle of Shiloh began in Tennessee as Confederate forces launched a surprise attack against Union troops, who beat back the Confederates the next day.

In 1909, American explorers Robert E. Peary and Matthew A. Henson and four Inuits became the first men to reach the North Pole.

In 1917, Congress approved a declaration of war against Germany.

In 1959, "Gigi" won the Academy Award for best picture of 1958; Susan Hayward was named best actress for "I Want To Live!" and David Niven was named best actor for "Separate Tables."  (To the embarrassment of the show's producers, the scheduled 2-hour ceremony fell about 20 minutes short.)

In 1973, Ron Blomberg of the New York Yankees became Major League Baseball's first designated hitter as he faced pitcher Luis Tiant of the Boston Red Sox at Fenway.  (Blomberg was walked with the bases loaded; Boston won the game, 15-5.)

In 1973, NASA launched Pioneer II, which flew by Jupiter and Saturn.

In 1998, country singer Tammy Wynette died at her Nashville home at age 55.

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Today-----Nobel Prize-winning scientist James D. Watson is 85, Composer-conductor Andre Previn is 84, Country singer Merle Haggard is 76, Actor Billy Dee Williams is 76, Actor Roy Thinnes is 75, Writer-comedian Phil Austin (Firesign Theatre) is 72, Movie director Barry Levinson is 71, Actor John Ratzenberger is 66, Actress Marilu Henner is 61 and Olympic bronze medal figure skater Janet Lynn is 60.

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April 6th is:  Army Day, New Beer's Eve, Drowsy Driver Awareness Day, National Love Our Children Day, The Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints Day, Tartan Day, National Student Athlete Day, Teflon Day and International Pillow Fight Day.

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Quip for the day......more punny.......The man who fell into the upholstery factory is now said to be fully recovered.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's---------it's Sunday.........

At Sunday School the children were told that God created everything, including human beings.

Little Johnny seemed especially interested when he heard the part about how Eve was created from one of Adam's ribs.

Later that week, his mother noticed him lying down and groaning in pain.

"Johnny, what is the matter?" she asked him.

He replied, with a grimace, "I have a pain in my side.  I think I'm going to have a wife!"

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In 1788, an expedition led by Gen. Rufus Putnam established a settlement at present-day Marietta, Ohio.

In 1798, the Mississippi Territory was created by an act of Congress, with Natchez as the capital.

In 1862, Union forces led by Gen. Ulysses S. Grant defeated the Confederates at the Battle of Shiloh in Tennessee.

In 1922, the Teapot Dome scandal began as Interior Secretary Albert B. Fall signed a secret deal to lease U.S. Navy petroleum reserves to his friends, oilmen Harry F. Sinclair and Edward L. Doheny.

In 1927, the image and voice of Commerce Secretary Herbert Hoover were transmitted live from Washington to New York in the first successful long-distance demonstration of television.

In 1949, the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical "South Pacific" opened on Broadway.

In 1959, a referendum in Oklahoma repealed the state's ban on alcoholic beverages.

In 1966, the U.S. Navy recovered a hydrogen bomb that the U.S. Air Force had lost in the Mediterranean Sea off Spain following a
B-52 crash.

In 1969, the Supreme Court, in Stanley v. Georgia, unanimously struck down laws prohibiting private possession of obscene material.

In 1978, President Jimmy Carter announced he was deferring development of the neutron bomb, a high-radiation weapon.

In 1983, space shuttle astronauts, Story Musgrave and Don Peterson went on the first U.S. spacewalk in almost a decade as the worked in the open cargo bay of Challenger for nearly four hours.

In 2003, the Supreme Court voted 6-3 to uphold a 50-year-old Virginia law making it a crime to burn a cross as an act of imtimidation. 

In 2003, Syracuse won the NCAA basketball tournament with an 81-78 victory over Kansas.

In 2008, Kansas won the NCAA championship defeating Memphis, 75-68.

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Today-----Actor James Garner is 85, Country singer Cal Smith is 81, Actor Wayne Rogers is 80, Media commentator Hodding Carter III is 78, Country singer Bobby Bare is 78, Rhythm-and-blues singer Charlie Thomas (The Drifters) is 76, California Gov. Jerry Brown is 75, Movie director Francis Ford Coppola is 74, TV personality David Frost is 74, Singer Patricia Bennett (The Chiffons) is 66, Singer John Oates is 64, Singer Janis Ian is 62 and Country musician John Dittrich is 62.

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April 7th is:  International Beaver Day, International Snailpapers Day, Metric System Day, National Beer Day, No Housework Day, Tangible Karma Day and World Health Organization Day.

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Quip for the day...........FACT:  Jesus was from California.  He walked around bare-footed, he never cut his hair and he started a new religion.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's--------riddle time............

Test your skills with these three riddles.  Answers below.

1.  The peasant is condemned to death.  He can choose between a room of raging fire, a room of sword swinging assassins or a room full of lions that haven't eaten in three years.  Which room is safest for him?

2.  What is black when you buy it, red when you use it and gray when you throw it away?

3.  Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Wednesday, Friday or Sunday?

Answers....

1.  The third room.  Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead.

2.  Barbeque charcoal.

3.  It's easy:  Yesterday, today and tomorrow.

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Today is Monday, April 8, the 98th day of 2013.  There are 267 days left in the year.

In 1935, President Franklin D. Roosevelt signed the Emergency Relief Appropriations Act, which provided money for programs such as the Works Progress Administration.

In 1943, President Franklin D. Roosevelt ordered a freeze on wages and prices to combat inflation.

In 1946,  the League of Nations assembled in Geneva for its final session.

In 1952, President Harry S. Truman seized the American steel industry to avert a nationwide strike.  (The Supreme Court later ruled that Truman had overstepped his authority, opening the way for a seven-week strike by steelworkers.)

In 1963, "Lawrence of Arabia" won the Oscar for best picture at the Academy Awards; Gregory Peck won best actor for "To Kill a Mockingbird" while Anne Bancroft received best actress honors for "The Miracle Worker."

In 1974, Hank Aaron of the Atlanta Braves hit his 715th career home run in a game against the Los Angeles Dodgers, breaking Babe Ruth's record.

In 1988, TV evangelist Jimmy Swaggart resigned from the Assemblies of God after he was defrocked for rejecting an order from the church's national leaders to stop preaching for a year amid reports he'd consorted with a prostitute.

In 1994, Kurt Cobain, singer and guitarist for the grunge band Nirvana, was found dead in Seattle from an apparently self-inflicted gunshot wound; he was 27.

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Today------Comedian Shecky Greene is 87, Actor-turned-diplomat John Gavin is 82, Basketball Hall-of-Famer John Havlicek is 73, "Mouseketeer" Darlene Gilllespie is 72, Singer Peggy Lennon (The Lennon Sisters) is 72, Songwriter-producer Leon Huff is 71, Actor Hywel Bennett is 69, Actor Stuart Pankin is 67, Rock musician Steve Howe is 66, Movie director John Madden is 64 and Rock musician Mel Schacher (Grank Funk Railroad) is 62.

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April 8th is:  Buddha Day and Trading Cards For Grown-ups Day.

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Quip for the day........Some people hear voices.  Some see invisible people. The rest have no imaginatiion whatsoever.

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's---------true.......

"Hey, Dad," one of my kids asked at the dinner table the other day.  "What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?"

"We didn't have fast food when I was growing up," I replied.

"C'mon, seriously.  Where did you eat?"

"It was a place called Home.  Your Grandma cooked every day and we sat together at the dinner table every day, and if I didn't like what she put on my plate, I was allowed to sit there until I did like it."

My kid laughed and ran off to his room, so I didn't get to tell him the part about how I had to have permission to leave the table.

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Today is April 9, the 99th day of 2013.  There are 266 days left in the year.

In 1682, French explorer Robert de La Salle claimed the Mississippi River Basin for France.

In 1865, Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee surrendered his army to Union Gen. Ulysses S. Grant at Appamattox Court House in Virginia.

In 1913, the first game was played at Ebbets Field, the newly built home of the Brooklyn Dodgers, who lost to the Philadelphia Phillies, 1-0.

In 1939, singer Marian Anderson performed a concert at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C., after being denied the use of Constitution Hall by the Daughters of the American Revolution.

In 1942, during World War II, American and Philippine defenders on Bataan capitulated to Japanese forces; the surrender was followed by the notorious Bataan Death March.

In 1947, a series of tornadoes in Texas, Oklahoma and Kansas claimed 181 lives.

In 1959, NASA presented its first seven astronauts:  Scott Carpenter, Gordon Cooper, John Glenn, Gus Grissom, Wally Schirra, Alan Shepard and Donald Slayton.

In 1983, the space shuttle Challenger ended its first mission with a safe landing at Edwards Air Force Base in California.

In 1996, in a dramtic shift of purse-string power, President Bill Clinton signed a line-item veto bill into law.  However, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down the veto in 1998.

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Today----Playboy magazine founder Hugh Hefner is 87, Satirical songwriter and mathematician Tom Lehrer is 85, Naturalist Jim Fowler is 81, Actress Michael Learned is 74, Country singer Margo Smith is 71 and Country singer Hal Ketchum is 60.

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April 9th is:  Equal Pay Day, National Be Kind To Lawyers Day, National Cherish An Antique Day, National Former Prisoner Of War Day, Appamattox Day, Jenkins Ear Day and Winston Churchill Day.

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Quip for the day............Mental backup in progress ------DO NOT DISTURB!

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Larryj

[larryJ]

Today's---------another punny one.......

Workers at a local Venetian blind factory went on strike.  The company agreed to negotiate and quickly granted most of the union's demands.

But then one faction of the workers, who operated the portion of the assembly line where the holes were bored into the slats, suddenly produced a new list of outrageous demands.  The company threatened to shut down the plant and fire the entire workforce.

The local newspaper ran an editorial very critical of the worker's union.  The headline read:

"They are trampling their advantage where the drapes of lath are bored."

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Today is the 100th day of 2013.  There are 265 days left in the year.

In 1790, President George Washington signed into law the first United States Patent Act.

In 1866, the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals was incorporated.

In 1912, the RMS Titanic set sail from Southampton, England, on its ill-fated maiden voyage.

In 1925, the novel "The Great Gatsby," by F. Scott Fitzgerald, was first published.

In 1947, Brooklyn Dodgers president Branch Rickey purchased the contract of Jackie Robinson from the Montreal Royals.

In 1953, the 3-dimensional horror movie "House of Wax," produced by Warner Bros. and starring Vincent Price, premiered in New York.

In 1963, the fast-attack nuclear submarine USS Thresher (SSN-593) sank during deep-diving tests east of Cape Cod in a disaster that claimed 129 lives.

In 2003, Congress overwhelmingly passed a package of child safety protections, including a national Amber Alert network.

In 2003, Eva Narcissus Boyd, the singer formerly known as "Little Eva," died in Kinston, NC.

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Today---------Actor Max von Sydow is 84, Actress Liz Sheridan is 84, Actor Omar Sharif if 81, Sportscaster John Madden is 77, Actor Steven Seagal is 62 and Folk-pop singer Terry Roche is 60.

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April 10th is:  ASPCA Day, National Farm Animals Day, National Sibling Day, Salvation Army Founder's Day and Safety Pin Day.

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Quip for the day....Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you........but not the one in front of you.

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Larryj