Every Day Light

[Judy Harder]

April 1
To die - or not to die?
For reading & meditation: 2 Corinthians 6:1-13
"' as dying, and behold we live '" (v.9, RSV)

Today we ask: What is the meaning of this strange spiritual paradox that before we can live, we must first be willing to die? The best illustration of this truth can be seen in the passage from John 12 that we read on the first day of our meditations and which we will now look at in greater detail. One day a group of visitors from Greece arrived in Jerusalem, and hearing of the fame of Jesus sought out Philip, one of His disciples, and said to him: "Sir, we would like to see Jesus" (John 12:21). When Philip informed Jesus that some Greeks wanted to interview Him, this precipitated a spiritual crisis in our Lord's heart: "The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified ' unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds" (John 12:24). Why should the Greeks' simple request precipitate such a crisis in Jesus' heart - a crisis in which dying or not dying seemed to be the vital issue? Could it have been that He sensed that the Greeks were coming with an invitation for Him to bring His message to Athens - the centre of philosophy and learning - where it might be more readily received? Did He sense that in wanting to interview Him, they were going to say: "Sir, if You go on the way Your face is set, the Jews will kill You. Don't stay here in Jerusalem and die: come to Athens and live"? If this was the situation, then how dramatically it would have underlined the issue that was constantly before Him - to die or not to die.

Prayer:
Blessed Lord Jesus, it is clear that I face a similar issue to the one You faced when here on earth - to die, or not to die. Help me, dear Lord, for I can only face it in Your strength. Amen.

For further study:
Galatians 2:1-20; Romans 8:36; 2 Timothy 2:11
1. How did Paul view life?
2. What analogy did he use?

[Judy Harder]

April 2
Come to Athens and live
For reading & meditation: John 7:25-39

"' Will he go where our people live scattered among the Greeks, and teach the Greeks?" (v.35)

We ended yesterday by suggesting that the issue which the Greeks might have wanted to talk over with Jesus was that of taking His message to Athens - the centre of philosophy and learning. Were they intent on saying to Him: "Put Your marvellous message of the kingdom of God into the medium of Greek thought, and in no time it will spread throughout the world. Don't stay in Jerusalem and die; come to Athens and live"? We have no way, of course, of knowing for sure that this was the situation, and I am simply suggesting that this is what may have been in their minds. The idea is not as far-fetched as you might imagine when placed against the verse that is before us today: `"Does he intend to go to the Dispersion ' and teach the Greeks?" (v.35, RSV). Had other nations beyond Israel's boundaries showed interest in His revolutionary approach to life? Tradition says that the king of Edessa once sent a message to Jesus inviting Him to come to his country and present His message concerning the kingdom of God. Whether or not this was so, one thing is certain - the coming of the Greeks precipitated a crisis in Jesus' soul: "Now my heart is troubled, and what shall I say? 'Father, save me from this hour'? ' Father, glorify your name!" (John 12:27-28). He would not rationalise or compromise; He would face the issue to which He had always been committed. It was not to be a philosopher's chair in Athens, but a grisly cross in Jerusalem. He would fall into the ground and die, and bear a harvest richer than anything the world could offer.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, help me to catch something of Your spirit as I face the challenges that lie ahead of me in the coming days. I want to make my life count for the utmost - show me how we can work things out together. Amen.

For further study:
John 19:17
1. What does the cross signify?
2. What does it mean to "take up your cross"?

[Judy Harder]

April 3

A blank cheque
For reading & meditation: Luke 22:39-48
"Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." (v. 42)

We have seen over the past two days how Jesus, when faced with the news that some Greeks wanted to interview Him, appeared to be precipitated into a spiritual crisis. Whatever we make of this incident in the life of our Lord, it is fairly obvious that some deep struggle is going on inside Him. And the terms of that struggle are also clear: "What shall I say? 'Father, save me from this hour'? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour" (John 12:27). This passage in John 12 underlines most powerfully the humanity of Jesus. We see Him recoiling for a moment and only for a moment - from the grim ordeal that He was about to face on Calvary, but He comes through to reaffirm His unswerving commitment to His Father's eternal will and purpose. Note once again the truth that seemed to sustain Him in this dark and crucial hour: "I must fall and die like a grain of wheat that falls between the furrows of the earth. Unless I die I will be alone - a single seed. But my death will produce many new wheat grains - a plentiful harvest of new lives" (John 12:23-24, TLB). He gave a blank cheque to God signed in His own blood. He would fall into the ground and die and bear a rich and bountiful harvest. He aligned Himself with self-giving and not self-saving. The momentous issue with which our Lord struggled in that hour is similar to the one which you and I are being called to face in these meditations - to die or not to die. The way we respond to it will determine our life-direction.

Prayer:
Father, I sense that quietly things are heading toward a moment of crisis in my life - a crisis of commitment. Help me to see these things, not merely as a matter for discussion, but a matter for decision. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen.

For further study:
Philippians 2:1-8; Psalms 40:8
1. What was God's will for His Son?
2. How did Jesus respond?

[Judy Harder]

April 4
The deepest law
For reading & meditation: Matthew 10:24-39
"Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."(v.39)

Out of this incident of the Greeks seeking an interview with Jesus came these great truths that Jesus uttered. We have already looked at some of our Lord's famous statements in John chapter 12 - here is another: "The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life" (John 12:25). What does it mean - "The man who loves his life will lose it"? It means that when you focus on your interests alone, your life will disintegrate. Those who have no one to centre on other than themselves and live only to have their own way finish up bankrupt, beggared and defeated. Dorothy Sayers put the same truth most effectively when she said: "Hell is the enjoyment of having one's own way for ever." But the rest of the verse is just as true: "The man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life." In other words, lose your life in the plans and purposes of God and you will find the true meaning of your existence. It is a paradox, but nevertheless true, that you are never so much your own as when you are most His. Bound to Him, you walk the earth free. Low at His feet, you stand straight before anything or anyone else. You suddenly realise that you have aligned yourself with the creative forces of the universe, so you are free - free to create, free to love, free to be at your best, free to be all that He desires you to be. And this is not just mere acquiescence. It is co-operation with the power that raised Jesus from the dead. No wonder someone called this principle, "the deepest law in the universe".

Prayer:
O God, once again You are boring deep - but You have my permission to keep going. When Your drill strikes hard resistances in me, don't hold back. I want the deep living waters of Your presence and power. Amen.

For further study:
Matthew 10:24-39; Mark 8:35; Philippians 3:8
1. What was Jesus teaching?
2. How does this work out in your life?

[Judy Harder]

April 5

What is the "Father's Glory"?
For reading & meditation: John 15:1-11
"This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples." (v.

Over these last few days, we have been seeing that just as Christ came face to face with the issue - To die or not to die - so also must we, His disciples, face a similar challenge. It is one of the axioms of the Christian life that in order to realise God's purposes in our lives, we must be prepared to die to all self-interest. Why is this so necessary? What possible purpose can our Lord have in making such a demand? Our text for today gives us the answer: "This is my Father's glory, that you may bear fruit in plenty and so be my disciples" (NEB). The Father's "glory" is what? Rainbows? Waterfalls? Chanting angels? No, the Father's "glory" is men and women who bring forth fruit in plenty. Is your life fruitful? Does it yield a rich harvest from which your Lord will derive eternal pleasure? If not, then perhaps the reason is that your are "a corn of wheat afraid to die". You draw back from experiences which are designed, not to demean you, but to develop you. And if you are afraid to die, then, as Jesus put it, you "remain only a single seed". A women once came up to me after I had preached a sermon on this theme, and said: "Why is God so cruel in demanding so much of us?" She meant: Why does God demand the one and only thing I own - me, myself? It seemed to her that she would be consenting to her own extinction. She saw only what she had to give up - not what she had to gain. If we are to win this battle, then we must do as Jesus did and continually focus our gaze on the fact that beyond the chosen way of the cross lies ultimate power and victory.

Prayer:
My Father and my God, I do not want to shirk, to dodge, or to put things off. Help me, and help me now, to face this issue of the death of my self-interests so that it is settled once and for all. Amen.

For further study:
John 15:1-11; Matthew 13:23; Romans 6:22
1. What is God's purpose for us?
2. What does that entail?

[Judy Harder]

April 7

His appointment
For reading & meditation: Proverbs 22:17-29
"Listen to this wise advice; follow it closely, for it will do you good ' Trust in the Lord." (vv.17-19, TLB)

Are you afraid of loneliness? If so, then it is likely that there is a greater fear than that in your life - the fear of "a corn of wheat afraid to die". Settle that fear, and all other fears are as nothing in comparison. When our attitude is that of complete and utter surrender to God and confidence in the outcome of His purposes, then we can face anything that comes - good, bad or indifferent. An extremely prominent minister who was greatly used by God got caught up in a spiritual conflict because he had his eye upon a position in his denomination which he desired for himself. He shared his desire with a prominent laymen and tried to get him to use his influence in securing the position. The layman said: "I do not think it right to use my influence in the way you ask. The decision must be with those who have been selected for that purpose." The minister was deeply upset by his friend's remarks and became extremely bitter and morose. In due course the position was given to someone else, and the minister, unable to cope with the disappointment, withdrew from the ministry and now lives in a big house all by himself - terribly alone. He was "a corn of wheat afraid to die". Had he been willing to die to the desire for self-aggrandisement, position and prestige, he would have seen the disappointment as "His-appointment". Now he is lonely with the loneliness that comes to all who fail to realise that God always gives the best to those who leave the choice to Him. My Father and my God, I see that there is no greater loneliness than the loneliness that comes from being locked into my own purposes and my own desires. Help me to be continually centred in You and not in myself. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen

Prayer:

My Father and my God, I see that there is no greater loneliness than the loneliness that comes from being locked into my own purposes and my own desires. Help me to be continually centred in You and not in myself. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen

For further study:
Proverbs 3:1-6; Psalms 37:3-5
1. What does "trust" mean?
2. What is promised to those who trust?

[Judy Harder]

April 8

God of remarkable surprises
For reading & meditation: Psalms 18:20-40
"O thou Eternal, thou wilt light my lamp ' thou wilt make my darkness shine." (v.28, Moffatt)
If you have not yet taken hold of the truth we have been discussing over the past few days, then grasp it with both hands today: the greatest loneliness is the loneliness of "a corn of wheat afraid to die". If we are afraid to die to our own purposes and allow God's purposes to become supreme, then we finish up pleasing ourselves but not liking the self we have pleased. And again, being willing to face any situation that comes with the conviction that God will make it contributive enables us to face life with an inner fortitude and poise. Understanding this truth and being willing to apply it to all circumstances and situations is one of the greatest safeguards against emotional or personality problems. In fact, I would go further and say that it is one of the greatest defences against reactive depression that I know. I say "reactive" depression because there are some forms of depression which are chemically based and result from malfunctioning of the body's chemical systems. Reactive depression is the depression that comes from the way we interpret the knocks and hardships that crowd into our lives. And what greater hardship can there be than loneliness? The Bible teaches us, however, that God will never allow one of His children to find themselves in any situation where He is not able to help them - loneliness included. Someone has referred to our heavenly Father as "the God of remarkable surprises". What a fascinating description - and how true. In the midst of life's loneliest moments, God has a way of approaching us and revealing Himself in ways that we would never have conceived possible.
Prayer:

Father - surprise me. In some way today, let the wonder of Your concern and care for me break through the ordered routines and duties of my life. Pull aside the curtain and give me a fresh glimpse of Your face. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen.
For further study:

1 Kings 19:1-8
1. How did God deal with Elijah's loneliness?
2. Whom did He send to him?

[Judy Harder]

April 9

Knowing God
For reading & meditation: Psalms 142:1-7
"When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way." (v.3)
We referred yesterday to our heavenly Father as "the God of remarkable surprises". We must stay with that thought a little longer and draw from it further inspiration. Who hasn't seen the scenario in the old silent movies in which a victim is tied to a railway track by a handlebar- moustached villain? But the story isn't over: invariably, moments before the train comes thundering around the corner, someone rescues the hapless victim from what looks like certain death - and often in the most surprising manner. Have you not often found a similar scenario in your own life? Just when it looks as if you are facing what seems like unmitigated disaster, the "God of remarkable surprises" turns a desperate situation into an opportunity for unparalleled joy. How does He do it? Just when we are feeling as if there is no one in the world who cares and that we will not be able to get through the day, He draws close to us and wraps the warmth of His presence around us in a way that makes the experience of temporary isolation worthwhile. You see, sometimes our knowledge of God is just theoretical - we know Him in our heads, but we dont really know Him in our hearts. In the depths of loneliness, however, this undergoes a deep change the theory is turned into reality. Someone has defined loneliness as "the surprising opportunity to know God". It is. When there is no one but God - those are the times when we learn to know God - and really know Him. The experience of loneliness is not easy to go through, but believe me, it is worth far more than the cost.
Father, something within me still shrinks away from the challenge that You are putting before me. Help me to understand, however, that in order to know You - really know You - I must be willing, not just to trust, but obey. Amen.

Prayer:

Father, something within me still shrinks away from the challenge that You are putting before me. Help me to understand, however, that in order to know You - really know You - I must be willing, not just to trust, but obey. Amen.
For further study:

Luke 24:13-35; Psalms 139:2; Matthew 6:8
1. What was the problem of these 2 disciples?
2. How did Jesus deal with them?

[Judy Harder]

April 10
From Holy Ground
For reading & meditation: Psalms 27:1-14
"One thing I ask of the Lord ' that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life '" (v.4)

We said yesterday it is in times of deepest loneliness, when there is no one there but God, that we learn to know Him most fully. Not long after my conversion in my mid-teens, a preacher I greatly admired came to stay in our home. I had the opportunity to sit with him for many hours asking him some of the spiritual questions which, up until then, had greatly perplexed me. During one period of discussion I said to him: "Tell me, what is the secret of your great and powerful ministry?" It was quite a while before he answered, and as I waited I pondered what his answer might be. Would he say, "It is the way I use words", or "My skill at chiselling attractive and appealing phrases", or perhaps, "My insight and understanding of the Scriptures"? It was none of these. He said quite simply: "If there is any power in my ministry, it has come out of walking with God through the valley of loneliness." I cannot remember in the whole of my life ever hearing a more compelling and moving statement than that. It introduced me to a truth that I myself had to learn - that the route to knowing God often passes through the valley of profound loneliness. The depth of character that is developed through loneliness is something that not only enriches the life of the individual concerned, but spills over into the lives of many others also. In periods of loneliness, the Master draws us into His presence so that later, when we speak to others, they sense we are speaking to them from holy ground.

Prayer:
O God, help me to commit my will to Your will, not to be borne but to be done. If knowing You - really knowing You - means walking through the valley of loneliness, then lead on, dear Lord - I will follow. Amen.

For further study:
1 Kings 19:9-21
1. What did Elijah wrongly believe in his loneliness?
2. How did God use his loneliness?

[Judy Harder]

April 11
Lonely - but not alone
For reading & meditation: John 16:19-33
"' you will be scattered, each to his own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me." (v.32)

We spend one last day looking at the issue of loneliness. Our meditations on this subject have made one thing clear: it is in the periods of loneliness that we most abandon ourselves to God and learn how to depend upon Him utterly and completely. The more I read the biographies of those who have achieved great things for God, the more I realise that their deep knowledge of Him came, in part, out of moments of profound loneliness. It was in such moments that "the God of remarkable surprises" revealed Himself and gave them an understanding of His grace and power such as they could never otherwise have known. Is it not true that God's glory bursts through most powerfully when the sky is at its darkest? Does not His strength uphold us most when we are feeling weak and inadequate? And does not His love penetrate most deeply when we feel unloved or isolated from others? When we are prepared to die to our own interests and are willing to follow our Lord fearlessly along the path which He sees is best for us, we experience, not just temporal, but eternal rewards. The seed that falls into the ground and dies is the one that yields a rich and bountiful harvest. Many of us fail to be fruitful in our Christian life and experience because we are afraid or unwilling to face the issues which demand a whole-hearted commitment to the will of God. We save ourselves - and then what? We finish up by not liking the self we have saved. Make no mistake about it - God's way is best, even though a thousand hardships beset the path.

Prayer:
O God my Father, give me the courage of Jesus who, despite His loneliness and isolation, went on to achieve Your perfect will. Quicken within me today the sense that when I am walking with You I may feel lonely, but I am never alone. Amen.

For further study:
John 11:1-46
1. How did it seem to Mary and Martha in their moment of loneliness?
2. What did Jesus say to them?