Girlfriends in God

[Judy Harder]

May 28, 2014
Search Me. Know Me. Show Me.
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth

"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting." (Psalm 139:23-24)

Friend to Friend

A few years ago my mother in law gave me a 12x magnification hand mirror as a part of a gift. She said that she uses hers all the time and expected that I would love it. Never thinking I would actually need or use it, I thanked her with all the grace I could muster and put the mirror away where I put the gifts that I never plan on needing or using. (C'mon. I know you have a spot in your house for that kind of gift too, right!?)

Fast-forward a few years...

My teenaged son was working on a self-portrait for art class and asked me if I had a hand mirror. Since I remembered that the 12x magnification mirror had a normal-mirror side, I ran and got it for him.

After his art project was completed, Preston returned the hand mirror to the top drawer of my bathroom vanity. (SO not where it had been!) Not long after that, on a grooming day, I reached for my tweezers to pluck what needed plucking, and in doing so my eyes fell upon the 12x magnification mirror.

"What the heck! I'll try it," I thought.

Insert freaky horror sounds here...

I was not at all prepared for the revelation of my up-close and personal reflection. My pores looked like swimming pools and my stray eyebrow hairs looked like tree trunks. Even the super tiny fine ones! It. Was. Crazy.

And I must tell you; eyebrow plucking has never been the same for me since!

Here's why: prior to having this hyper magnified experience, I'd always thought I did a good job plucking my eyebrows. But the clarity and power that came with the 12x magnification mirror has changed the game. Though I used to think I did a good job plucking, now I know that I do – because what is not visible to me in a normal mirror is vibrantly clear in the magnified one. So now every stray that doesn't belong gets gone!

Over the years, I've found it far too easy to go through my days in a way that's similar to how I used to pluck my eyebrows. I've allowed only the easily visible sins to be plucked from my life, leaving me blissfully unaware of the smaller, harder-to-see stray responses, attitudes, thought patterns, and choices that need to be plucked as well. This is still a constant struggle!

God's plans for us are so much greater than this type of living. He tells us that we are to be holy as he is holy (Leviticus 11:44,1 Peter 1:16). How can we? With His help... and only with His help. We can trust that he is ready to be there every time we need Him because He knows and loves us more than we will ever be able to grasp.

God knows us perfectly. He's familiar with all of our ways – good and bad. He knows where we go, what we think, how we feel, what we prioritize and how we respond. He sees us on the mountaintops and He sees us in the pits. The psalmist David proclaimed that before a word was even on his tongue, God knew it completely. (Psalm 139:4)

He loves us perfectly. His love goes before us, behind us, above us and below us. He compassionately protects, provides for, and cherishes us. Psalm 139 blows me away! I just can't wrap my mind around the thought that God, who created space and time, is not constrained by space or time. He loved us and knew us before we even were! All of the days of our lives are ordained and were written in His book before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:16)

In awe of our all-present, all-seeing, all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving God, David deeply desired to live a life of pure, responsive worship. He cried out, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." (Psalm 139: 23-24)

That's a 12x magnified prayer, my friend! David prayed for purposed purity to rise. He wanted God to show him the stray sins that he could not see – SO THAT the Lord could then lead him to a better, more holy way.

If you and I can get this... if we will determine to prioritize this type of praying on a heart level and allow God to sift through the stray sins of our lives, the Spirit of God will lead us to new heights, widths, and depths of His love, purity, and power.

Ready for a deeper, 12x magnified adventure with God? JUST ASK... Lord, search me! Know me! Show me! Then, JUST LISTEN... and be prepared to move in the direction of His leading and His love.

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, Search me. Know me. Show me. Please shine your holy light on any shady areas of my life that need correction or direction. Crush any stubborn ways that keep me from Your will and Your best. Magnify any secret sins or unknown compromises that hinder my holiness. And move me forward in Your grace so that I can be led by Your Spirit and so that others can see Your love through me.

In Jesus' name,

Amen

Now It's Your Turn

Read Psalm 139. Journal a prayer response.

Grab your Bible and a journal or piece of paper and then fill in the blanks of these verses:

"Where can I __ from your _______? Where can I ___ from your __________? If I go up to the __________, you are ________; if I make my bed in the __________, you are _________. If I _________ on the wings of the dawn, if I ________ on the far side of the sea, _______ ___________ your hand will ________ me, your right hand will _______ me fast." (Psalm 139: 7-10, NIV)

NOW, let's make that personal. Fill in the following blanks, inserting your people, places and heart matters.

"Lord, Your loving presence is incredible! Your Word assures me that even if ______________ happens, you are there. When I'm overwhelmed by the circumstances with _______________, you are there. When I find myself filled with fears and doubts about ______________, your right hand will hold me fast. Thank you, Lord. I cherish your presence and love you too."

Let's take this to the next level. Need PRAYER? Click over to my blog or my Facebook page and leave a prayer request in the comments section. Then pause to pray for some of the other prayer needs on my wall.

[Judy Harder]

May 29, 2014
Stress Management 101
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

Do not worry about anything. But pray and ask God for everything you need. And when you pray, always give thanks. And God's peace will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. The peace that God gives is so great that we cannot understand it (Philippians 4:6-7, ICB).

Friend to Friend

Stress management is a spiritual discipline that begins with diligent preparation in every area of life – mental, emotional, physical and spiritual. We must be ready to deal with stress before we are required to deal with stress. Dealing with stress is an ongoing, daily battle that will not end this side of Heaven. In order to win that battle, we must be prepared. While there is no single secret to handling stress, God's Word is filled with many truths that can enable and empower us to deal with stress in a healthy, productive, and God-honoring way.

Sometimes the most familiar passages of scripture are also the most overlooked. Psalm 23 is one of those passages. I often find myself rushing to this psalm for peace and comfort in the aftermath of a stressful situation or for guidance and shelter from the storm that I see barreling straight for the unprepared shores of my life. However, I have also discovered that Psalm 23 is a powerful tool for dealing with stress on an everyday basis.

If you are like me, I tend to handle the major calamities in life better than the mundane, ordinary but definitely stress-inducing minutia of daily living. A study of Psalm 23 has led me to believe that it is often the small pebble in my shoe, rather than the massive boulder on my path, that causes the greatest stress in my life. Life is so daily! Fortunately, so is God.

God promises to be my shepherd, to lead and guide me, to provide my every need, to protect me from my enemies, to fill my heart with peace, and to stand between my greatest fears and me.

God delivered a profound message when He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to live among us each and every day. Jesus could have come to us in many ways, but He chose to interrupt the ordinary with the extraordinary. Jesus could rightfully have been born in a palace. He was, after all, a King. Yet His life on earth began in a manger - a smelly, dusty, dirty and common barn. The simplicity of His birth is one of His most precious gifts to us. It is also a constant reminder that He really does care about everything that touches our lives - no matter how small or insignificant it may seem. God wants to be involved in the simple, ordinary happenings of each day.

While I cannot imagine my world without the presence and power of Jesus Christ, I am often guilty of living as if He does not exist. The result is a stress-filled life.

A trial comes and I try to handle it on my own.

Loneliness empties my heart and instead of reaching out to Him, I withdraw into the darkness where stress is waiting to fill that emptiness with anxiety and fear.

Still, God is faithful.

His peace is a soothing balm that leads me once again to the manger and away from stress. Emmanuel, God with me! He steps into my life and changes everything. When He comes, stress is stripped away, tranquility given in its place.

When I find myself wishing I could have been there that holy night when Jesus was born, He gently reminds me that I had my own manger experience, when God became a personal reality in my life. I have my own holy moments each and every day as I reach out to Him and He is there, right in the middle of my common, ordinary and often smelly circumstance.

Stress has no place in a heart that kneels before the manger. Stress is powerless in a life that continually seeks God and chooses to surrender to His love and care – like the sheep surrender to the love and care of their Shepherd. Psalm 23 describes the intimate, personal and trusting relationship between sheep and shepherd, between child and father, and is not only a beautiful portrait of God's complete and faithful provision, but an arsenal of stress-busting truths and principles that, when embraced and applied, will empower and equip us to live a life of peace and victory.

Let's Pray

Father, I want to thank You for your unconditional love and forgiveness. Help me focus on You and Your presence in my life each day. I pray that any stress in my heart will be swallowed up in the reality that You are faithful and in control. I know You are not surprised by anything that comes my way and will transform the good into better, the unthinkable into the unstoppable, and the unbelievable into fact. I praise You for the amazing way You guide me and lift me up when I fall. I want to focus on You today and thank You that in doing so, I will experience true peace.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now it's Your Turn

Think about the way you begin each day. Are you afraid of what the day holds? Do you dread facing whatever comes your way? Or do you focus on God and His promises? Make the choice today to walk in faith, peace, and victory.

More from the Girlfriends

Stress is one of the enemy's favorite weapons to use against me. Stress has caused physical pain, emotional darkness, and spiritual bankruptcy in my life. I constantly have to bring my heart and mind back to God. I know how hard it is to stay balanced and at peace. Need help? Check out my book, Escaping the Stress Trap, to discover nine steps you can take to manage stress...instead of allowing it to manage you.

[Judy Harder]

May 30, 2014
Guiltless Living
Ginger Hubbard

We hope you are enjoying the Girlfriends in God daily devotions. We (Mary, Sharon, and Gwen) would like to introduce you to some of our special friends. From time-to-time, the Friday devotions will be written by one of our friends in ministry. We call them our "Friday Friends." So grab your Bible and a fresh cup of coffee and drink in the words from our "Friday Friend," Ginger Hubbard.

Today's Truth

For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him (John 3:17, NIV).

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1).

Friend to Friend

For so long in my life, I struggled with trying to be a good Christian. Inevitably, I would blow it on a daily basis - then proceed to beat myself up spiritually and emotionally.

In setting my standards high for being what I perceived the perfect wife and mom, I chose the woman described in Proverbs 31 as my role model. On one particular morning, I remember reading about her and making unfavorable comparisons. She got up before it was still dark. I had rolled out of bed around 8:30 am. She was well dressed in fine linen and purple. I was in a baggy, terrycloth robe with my hair pulled up in an orange chip clip. She held the distaff while grasping the spindle with her fingers (not sure what those things are, but I'm certain they contributed to her noble character). I held the dust buster to the crumbs on my bed sheets while grasping the empty bag of Doritos. She provided good food for her family and was always on top of things. I offered a choice of Burger King or McDonalds and felt the weight of my unaccomplished to-do list crashing down on me.

In comparison, I didn't measure up. I felt anxious, defeated and disappointed in myself.

I wanted to be the wife who was always cheerful, never irritable, and only said words that edified, encouraged and built up. I wanted to be the mom who never lost it and only spoke with kindness, wisdom and faithful instruction. But, as hard as I tried, I always wound up blowing it in some way.

I just couldn't achieve the "good Christian" status I desired.

Through prayer and studying God's Word, I began to realize that no matter how hard I tried, I would never achieve being the perfect Christian. I learned that the battle of victorious Christian living could not be won by sheer willpower or by teeth-gritting determination, but by tucking myself underneath the full armor of God and trusting that God is not only fighting for me, but He's already won the battle.

In measuring our self-worth in accordance with our own performances, we not only become anxious, but we miss out on experiencing the peace and rest of who we truly are in Christ.

Our worth is not based on what we do or don't do. It's not based on our successes and failures. It's not even based on whether we sin a little or sin a lot.

Our worth is based solely on Christ and the atoning work He has done on our behalf. We are His children, purchased at a price, forgiven and fully redeemed.

Embracing this wonderful truth brings about freedom. It's the freedom to forget about ourselves and lay down our measuring rods of self-worth and ongoing scrutiny. It's the freedom to release the suffocating anxiety our weaknesses cause, and instead take hold of God's grace given to us through the cross.

Join me today in letting go of performance-based worth and self-imposed expectations. May we purpose to rest in the victory Christ has already won and truly experience the rich and satisfying joy of Guiltless Living!

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, help me to understand and accept that my worth is not based on my own performance or on being a "good Christian," but on You and what You have done for me. You say in Your Word that no one is righteous except You. Thank You, Jesus, for dying on the cross, winning victory over sin on my behalf. Thank You for loving me, forgiving me, cleansing me and clothing me in Your righteousness. Help me to rest in the freedom of guiltless living based on Your atoning work at Calvary.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Does your emotional state vary in accordance with your own performances as a Christian, whether those performances leave you feeling defeated or prideful?

How is feeling defeated when you blow it not relying on Christ for your worth?

How is feeling prideful when you experience spiritual success dishonoring to God?

More from the Girlfriends

Because I have struggled so much with the issue of performance-based self-worth, I have a great compassion for other struggling women. I can relate and understand the mental, spiritual and physical exhaustion that comes from this way of living. If you are one of these women, it is my deep desire that you lay down your measuring rod of self-worth and stop beating yourself up. I desire this so much that I wrote a book (complete with a seven week Bible Study) to help you experience the freedom of Guiltless Living.

[Judy Harder]

June 2, 2014
Seeing Yourself as God Sees You
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let's not let it slip through our fingers. We don't have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He's been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let's walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help(Hebrews 4:14-16, MSG).

Friend to Friend

For almost forty years, Margaret lived with word-inflicted wounds that nearly destroyed her life. From the first day she attended her one-room schoolhouse, she and her teacher, Ms. Garner, didn't get along. Ms. Garner was harsh, bitter, and cruel, and could not tolerate Margaret's childish idiosyncrasies. For years, the tension between the two built up pressure.

Margaret was nine-years-old when the cataclysmic day occurred—the one that ripped her world apart. It happened after recess when she frantically raced into class, late again. As she burst through the doors, she faced her peers jeering at her maliciously.

"Margaret!" Ms. Garner shouted. "We have been waiting for you! Get up here to the front of the class, right now!"

Margaret walked slowly to the teacher's desk, was told to face the class, and then the nightmare began.

Ms. Garner ranted, "Boys and girls, Margaret has been a bad girl. I have tried to help her to be responsible. But, apparently, she doesn't want to learn. So we must teach her a lesson. We must force her to face what a selfish person she has become.

"I want each of you to come to the front of the room, take a piece of chalk, and write something bad about Margaret on the blackboard. Maybe this experience will motivate her to become a better person!"

Margaret stood frozen next to Ms. Garner. One by one, the students began a silent procession to the blackboard. One by one, the students wrote their life-smothering words, slowly extinguishing the light in Margaret's soul. "Margaret is stupid! Margaret is selfish! Margaret is fat! Margaret is a dummy!" On and on they wrote until twenty-five terrible scribblings of Margaret's "badness" filled the chalkboard.

The venomous accusations taunted Margaret in what felt like the longest day of her life. After walking home with each caustic word indelibly written on her heart, she crawled into her bed, claimed sickness, and tried to cry the pain away. But the pain never left, and forty years later she slumped in the waiting room of a psychologist's office, still cringing in the shadow of those twenty-five sentences.

Jesus understands what it feels like to have people call you names. People called Him a blasphemer (Matthew 9:3), the prince of demons (Matthew 9:34), an evil spirit (Mark 3:30), and a lawbreaker (Mark 2:24). His own family said that He was crazy (Mark 3:21). Yes, He knows what it feels like to have a broken heart—both figuratively and physically.

Jesus understands our hurt because He experienced it for Himself. Eugene Peterson, in his work The Message, wrote: "Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let's not let it slip through our fingers. We don't have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He's been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let's walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help" (Hebrews 4:14-16 MSG).

Let's go back to Margaret for a moment. Her story is recorded in Ron Lee Davis' book, Mistreated.

After decades of depression and anxiety, she had finally sought help from a psychologist. Two long years of weekly counseling helped Margaret to finally extricate herself from her past. It had been a long and difficult road, but she smiled at her counselor (how long it had been since she'd smiled!) as they talked about her readiness to move on.

"Well, Margaret," the counselor said softly, "I guess its graduation day for you.  How are you feeling?"

After a long silence, Margaret spoke. "I...I'm okay."

The counselor hesitated. "Margaret, I know this will be difficult, but just to make sure you're ready to move on, I am going to ask you to do something. I want you to go back to your schoolroom and detail the events of that day. Take your time. Describe each of the children as they approach the blackboard; remember what they wrote and how you felt—all twenty-five students."

In a way, this would be easy for Margaret. For forty years she had remembered every detail. And yet, to go through the nightmare one more time would take every bit of strength she had. After a long silence, she began the painful description. One by one, she described each of the students vividly, as though she had just seen them, stopping periodically to regain her composure, forcing herself to face each of those students one more time.

Finally, she was finished, and the tears would not stop, could not stop. Margaret cried a long time before she realized someone was whispering her name.  "Margaret.  Margaret.  Margaret." She looked up to see her counselor staring into her eyes, saying her name over and over again. Margaret stopped crying for a moment.

"Margaret. You...you left out one person."

"I certainly did not! I have lived with this story for forty years. I know every student by heart."

"No, Margaret, you did forget someone. See, he's sitting in the back of the classroom. He's standing up, walking toward your teacher, Ms. Garner. She is handing him a piece of chalk and he's taking it, Margaret, he's taking it! Now he's waking over to the blackboard and picking up an eraser. He is erasing every one of the sentences the students wrote. They are gone! Margaret, they are gone!  Now he's turning and looking at you, Margaret. Do you recognize him yet? Yes, his name is Jesus. Look, he's writing new sentences on the board. 'Margaret is loved. Margaret is beautiful. Margaret is gentle and kind. Margaret is strong. Margaret has great courage.'"

And Margaret began to weep. But very quickly, the weeping turned into a smile, and then into laughter, and then into tears of joy.

For forty years Margaret had limped through life with the pain of a broken heart. But finally she allowed Jesus, the Healer, the Comforter, the Great Physician, to bind up the broken heart and allow it to heal.

What is Jesus writing on the chalkboard about you?

            You are chosen.

            You are dearly loved.

            You are holy.

            You are beautiful.

            You are pure.

            You are my bride.

            I have your name engraved on the palm of my hand.

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, thank You that I am a new creation in Christ Jesus (2 Corinthians 5:17). I can almost picture You walking to the front of the room and writing my new identity in Christ on the board. Help me to see myself as You see me and never believe the lies that tell me otherwise.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Do you see yourself as God sees you?

Read Ephesian chapter 1 and list everything you learn about your new identity in Christ.

Are there any names that you need to erase from the chalkboard of your mind?

More from the Girlfriends

Do you know who you are? I'm not talking about who others have said you are in the past. I'm not talking about who you think you are? I'm talking about who God says you are. Click here for a list of Your New Identity In Christ. Print it off. Paste it up. Get it in your heart and soul. This is the truth. And for more on who you are, what you have, and where you are as a child of God, see my book Becoming Spiritually Beautiful: Seeing Yourself as God Sees You. It will set you free!

[Judy Harder]

June 3, 2014
Fogged In?
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

So we do not look at what we can see right now, the troubles all around us, but we look forward to the joys in heaven which we have not yet seen. The troubles will soon be over, but the joys to come will last forever(II Corinthians 4:18).

Friend to Friend

In an effort to escape the brutal summer heat of South Florida, our family headed to the beautiful mountains of North Carolina. We splashed in the icy mountain streams until our hands and feet were almost numb from the cold and spent as much time outside as we possibly could; trying to soak up the cool, crisp mountain air. The Blue Ridge Parkway was one of our favorite spots for hiking, so we planned a day trip that included exploring a few hiking trails, a picnic and a visit to the beautiful and historic colonial home of Carl Sandburg.

We woke to discover the beautiful weather of the day before had dissolved into a soupy mix of drizzle and fog. But we were not about to let a little fog and rain deter us from our original plan. We had been vacationing in North Carolina for years and knew that fog is a common occurrence – even in the summer. We piled into our van and made our way up the mountain.

The closer we got to the Sandburg home, the heavier the fog became. In fact, when we arrived, the fog was so thick that we could barely see the walkway that led to the gift shop where we needed to purchase tickets for the tour of the home and grounds. We decided that we would have to come back another day for the tour, but since we were already at the gift shop, it wouldn't hurt to do a little browsing.

The shop owner greeted us warmly and asked if we would like to purchase tickets for the guided tour that was scheduled to leave in an hour. Always the diplomat, I responded, "Are you kidding me? Have you looked outside?" The owner smiled and said, "Oh, you mean the fog? It will be gone in a little while. Now – how many tickets do you need?" I don't like pushy salesmen, even when they are sweet and kind – and maybe a little near-sighted. "I think we will just wait and see if the fog actually lifts," I responded, convinced that the thick fog would last all day, and resumed my browsing.

I lost track of time and was surprised to hear the owner announce, "The tour is leaving in 15 minutes. This is our final call for tickets." I walked out of the gift shop to discover that the fog really was lifting and the skies were actually beginning to clear. I couldn't believe my eyes! Within minutes, the sun was shining - as if the fog had never existed.

It sometimes feels as if the fog of doubt and fear of darkness will never lift from our lives. The promises of God seem to get swallowed up by the problems we face. We want to curse our crisis – not praise God in the midst of that crisis. The hurt and pain overwhelm our faith and we lose sight of the fact that this world is not our home and the troubles we face are only temporary. Lift up your eyes, Girlfriend. Fix your heart and mind on God – He is with you.

I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth" (Psalm 121:1-2, NIV).

Let's Pray

Lord, I need Your help. I am tired of trying to face my problems in my own strength. Please help me keep my gaze on You and my glance on my circumstances. Help me remember that Your strength and power are more than enough to face anything that comes my way. And when I am afraid, teach me how to put my trust in You alone.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read Isaiah 51:6. "Liftup your eyes to the heavens, look at the earth beneath; the heavens will vanish like smoke, the earth will wear out like a garment and its inhabitants die like flies. But my salvation will last forever, my righteousness will never fail."

What does this verse say about the importance of earthly possessions and values in comparison to the joys waiting for us in Heaven?

What fears are you facing today? What step(s) do you need to take in order to find victory over those fears?

Read and memorize the following verses. When you are afraid, pray and speak these verses aloud.

· Psalm 46:1 "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble" (NIV).

· Psalm 63:7-8 "Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me" (NIV).

· Isaiah 42:16 "I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them" (NIV).

More from the Girlfriends

The "Fear Factor" is not just a television show. Fear is a faithful companion in a world filled with broken people, many of whom live at the mercy of their fears. Need help? Check out my downloadable Bible Study, Getting a Grip on Fear that uncovers God's plan for peace and identifies five ways to deal with and be free from fear.

[Judy Harder]

June 4, 2014
Turning "Why Me?" into "What Now?"
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed(1 Peter 1:6-7, NIV).

Friend to Friend

My son and I sat on the floor in his room playing Rummy. We had just a few minutes before rushing off to register for his summer swim class and wanted to get in one more round of play. This summer was proving to be the best ever. Our golden retriever, Ginger, had just delivered seven adorable puppies, Steven was enjoying his sixth summer of life, and after four years of the heartache of negative pregnancy tests, God had surprised us with a new life growing inside my womb.

But as Steven and I sat on the floor, I felt a warm sticky sensation run down my leg. A trip to the bathroom confirmed my greatest fear.

Later that afternoon, our baby died, and is now waiting for us in heaven.

What began as a summer full of life and joy, quickly turned into a season of great loss and sadness. I mourned for that child for which I had prayed. I felt the ache of empty arms.

I once heard someone say, "I never knew I could miss someone that I had never met." Now I understood. We never knew for sure, but in my heart, I felt that the baby had been a little girl.

During those summer months, I went through the grieving process step-by-step. I'll admit that I was angry at God for "taunting" me with this gift of a child and then taking her away. But through the months and years that followed, God taught me many lessons about myself, about Him, and about trusting in His unfailing love.

I believe that when we go through a trial that wounds us deeply, God can use it to teach us valuable lessons. Some of those lessons are a deeper understanding of who God is, of who we are, and of what we truly believe. Our faith grows in the petri dish of struggles in the laboratory of life.

One of my most valuable lessons, through all my wounds and scars, was a decision to stop saying "why me?" and to begin saying "what now?" But the lesson that continues reverberating like a gentle thunder is the truth of God's unfailing love.

During the months that followed the loss of our child, I struggled with God. Just as Jacob wrestled with God through his dark night of the soul, I wrestled as well.

How could He love me and allow this to happen? Why would God withhold my dream? Is He able? Is He kind? Is He really there?

It was a dry summer...in my heart and soul. No one could help me, comfort me, or lift me out of my deep pit of sadness. And while I didn't want to talk to God, He never left my side. Patiently, He waited for me to cry out to Him...to say, I will trust you even though I do not understand.

It is easy to trust God when life is skipping happily along. It is a deeper faith that forms when the skipping halts to the slow crawl of despair. Honestly, I never enjoy the struggles, but I do revel in the deeper understanding of God that is forged in the fire.

As Peter wrote, "In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed" (1 Peter 1:6-7 NIV).

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, sometimes things happen in my life that I just don't understand. But I know You hold the box top to the puzzle pieces, and You know how the pieces all fit together. I trust You, Lord. Though Your ways may twist and turn as through a maze, I know that You make no mistakes. You are good...all the time.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

What has been a time in your life when you did not understand God's ways?

What was the final outcome of Job's incredible trial? (Job 42:10,12)

Can you trust God as Job did when his life fell apart?

If you are willing to turn you "why me?" into "what now?" click over to my Facebook page and simply say, "I'm willing, Lord."

[Judy Harder]

June 9, 2014
When God Intends "IT" for Good
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

'You intended to harm me,' Joseph explained, 'but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives'(Genesis 50:20, NIV).

Friend to Friend

Joseph was a man who had many bad things happen in his life. His story is recorded in Genesis chapters 37-50. While he was his father's favorite son, he was his brothers' least favorite sibling. Because their dad, Jacob, showed relentless favoritism toward this child of his beloved wife, Rachel, his brothers were jealous, mocking, and spiteful toward him. Naïve Joseph didn't help matters. He flaunted a special ornamented coat that his father had tailor-made just for him, tattled on his brothers for bad behavior, and shared a dream he should have kept to himself.

"Listen to this dream I had," Joseph said to his brothers. "We were binding sheaves of grain out in the field when suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright, while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it" (Genesis 37:6-7).

Bad move. That was a dream he should have kept to himself. After this revelation, his brothers hated him even more. But the poor boy didn't catch on and told of yet another dream.

"Listen to this other dream I had," he said. "The sun, moon and eleven stars were bowing down to me."

This dream was the straw that broke the camel's back.

One day his brothers saw an opportunity to get rid of this dreamer once and for all. At first they threw him into a cistern, bloodied his precious coat, and schemed to tell their dad Joseph had been killed by a wild animal. Just as they placed the youngest brother into the cistern, a slave caravan headed to Egypt was passing by. Seeing the opportunity to make a bit of profit, the brothers decided to sell Joseph to the slave trader rather than leave him to die. So off he went to a life of slavery.

But the hard times didn't end there. He was falsely accused of attempted rape, thrown into prison by an angry husband, and betrayed and forgotten by his jail-mates. The first thirty years of Joseph's life were filled with more heartache and trouble than most of us will experience in a dozen lifetimes.

But a few years later, Joseph's life took a different turn. The Pharaoh had a disturbing dream that no one could interpret. The cupbearer, one of Joseph's former inmates, remembered Joseph from his prison days and told the king about his ability to interpret dreams. Joseph interpreted the dream, saved Egypt from an impending famine, and was made second in command to the Pharaoh himself.

Many years passed. During the years of abundance, the Egyptians gathered more grain than they could count. Then when the seven years of famine hit, they had enough grain to sustain their country and the surrounding countries as well. Among those who came to purchase food, was none other than Joseph's deceitful brothers. Joseph forged the path of forgiveness and set a standard unmatched until the cross. He was reunited with his family, including his elderly father and younger brother whom he had never met.

Joseph's brothers were terrified at the punishment they feared would be heaped on their heads. But Joseph saw the hidden treasure in his painful circumstances. "You intended to harm me," Joseph explained, "but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives" (Genesis 50:20).

He chose to see the good in the bad. He saw a greater purpose in his seemingly terrible circumstances.

How about you? Are there some seemingly bad circumstances that could perhaps hold treasures yet to be discovered? Has a broken dream been restored to something more wonderful than you could have imagined? Have you gone to a deeper level with God because of a difficult situation? Are you a stronger person today because of pain from your past?

Today, let's look at the trials of our lives through the lens of Joseph's words, "You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good."

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, there are people in my past who have hurt me. Maybe they don't even realize the pain they have caused, and maybe they didn't do it intentionally. I refuse to allow the enemy to use my past to make me bitter! What Satan intends for evil, I know that You will use for good. Help me to see the good in each dark situation and use it for Your glory!

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn   

Have you had times in your life similar to Joseph's where you were treated unjustly?

What can you learn from the way Joseph handled the offenses?

How important was forgiveness in each one of those offenses?

What does that tell you about how important forgiveness is in your own life?

What was the final outcome of those injustices and subsequent forgiveness in Joseph's life?

Are you ready to allow what the enemy intended to harm you to be used for your good? If so, click over to my Facebook page and say, "I'm ready and willing!"

More from the Girlfriends

Joseph certainly had many bad things happen to him. It seems like he always found his purpose whether he was in the pit, the prison or the palace. Wouldn't you like to have that perspective on life? If you would like to learn more about how to find peace and purpose in the hurts of your past, and how to change what the enemy intended to harm you into something amazing for God, see my book my book Your Scars are Beautiful to God: Finding Peace and Purpose in the Hurts of Your Past.       

Also, click here see my Summer Sale going on from June 2-11.

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[Judy Harder]

June 10, 2014
Time for a Change?
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles;they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint (Isaiah 40:28-31, NIV).

Friend to Friend

Have you ever wanted to "freeze" a moment and make it last a lifetime? I have. I have also lived through certain moments that I wish I could change or even delete and pretend they never happened. But change is a natural part of life. We can embrace it, or we can fight it.

My husband often says that the only people who really like change are wet babies. However, I have discovered that some people thrive and live for change to the point that they are "change junkies," and have little stability in life. Others dig in their heels and refuse to change a thing. The result is that they ultimately become prisoners of old habits – good and bad. When it comes to change, we have a decision to make. Change is a sign of growth and life and is sometimes needed simply to survive.

God may be asking you to step out in faith and make a change in your life. He has already been where He is asking you to go. In fact, He has prepared every step of the way for you. You don't have to be afraid of the unknown. It is unknown only to you.

God is well aware of where you are and of every step He is asking you to take. He may be asking you to get rid of old memories, eliminate destructive habits and forsake lifeless traditions. He is waiting for you to take one step. Faith in God does not come all at once. Faith is a step-by-step process that begins with one small step and increases as we go. An Old Testament story found in Joshua 3 illustrates this truth.

The Israelites are camped on the bank of the Jordan River. Forty years earlier, they had escaped from Egypt and have been wandering around in the wilderness ever since. All of their needs have been met by God. They have seen miracle after miracle and now they can see Canaan, the Promised Land. However, there is a problem.

A huge river stands between them and the Promised Land - and there is no way around it. God told His people that He would make a dry path through the river, but the priests had never seen that happen. In fact, they hadn't even been born when the Red Sea was parted, and there were no reruns of the Ten Commandments at the local Wilderness Theatre. The Israelites had spent their entire adult lives in the wilderness and they could finally see a way out.

Oh, and one more problem -- the priests couldn't swim. This was probably the first river they had even been close to in their lives. I can imagine their fear and questions. God was asking them to step out in a whole new level of faith.

I don't imagine the Israelites had a great deal of faith in God at that moment, but they had just enough faith to take that first step. And that was enough.

Joshua 3:15-17 (NCV) During harvest the Jordan overflows its banks. When the priests carrying the Ark came to the edge of the river and stepped into the water, the water upstream stopped flowing. It stood up in a heap. So the people crossed over.

Notice that God did nothing until those toes touched the water. That first step was all God needed to see. Many times, we won't take the first step of change because we're afraid we won't be able to make the whole journey.

Don't wait until you believe it all.
Don't wait until you can see it all.
Don't wait until you understand it all.

Trust God and step out in faith. He will meet you there.

Let's Pray

Father, I come to You in faith. I will admit that change scares me because it means I have to face the unknown. I know it is a control issue, Lord. Right now, I surrender the control of my life and my journey to You. Give me the strength to step out in faith and make the changes You are asking me to make.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read Isaiah 40:28-31 again.

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles;they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Make a list of the reasons we can trust God – even when facing uncertainty.

Are you tired? Is God asking you to make some changes in your life? Record those changes in your journal.

What one thing is keeping you from stepping out in faith? Are you willing to surrender that one thing to God right now?

[Judy Harder]

June 11, 2014
When Forgetting Is Not Enough
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten...You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the LORD your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed (Joel 2:25-26, NIV).

Friend to Friend

In my last devotion we looked at the life of Joseph. Today, let's take one more look at his gnarly family tree.

By his thirty-seventh birthday, Joseph had two sons. One he named Manasseh which means "God has made me forget all my trouble and all my father's household."

The second son he named Ephraim, which means "It is because God has made me fruitful in the land of my suffering."         

Many years after his sons had been born, Joseph learned that his father, Jacob, was ill. So he took his two sons, Manasseh and Ephraim and traveled for one last visit. 

When they arrived, Jacob said, "Bring the boys to me so I may bless them."

Joseph brought his sons to his father's bedside. He placed Ephraim on his right toward Jacob's left hand and Manasseh, his first born, on his left toward Jacob's right hand. But instead of giving the blessing to Joseph's firstborn, Jacob reached out his right hand and put it on Ephraim's head, though he was the younger. Then he crossed his arms and put his left hand on Manasseh's head.

Joseph tried to stop his father from giving the blessing to the second born rather than the firstborn, but his father refused.

"I know, my son, I know. He too will become a people, and he too will become great. Nevertheless, his younger brother will be greater than he, and his descendants will become a group of nations..." So he put Ephraim ahead of Manasseh.

What a beautiful picture. Yes, Joseph had a life of trouble and suffering at the hands of those who abused, neglected and betrayed him. But God didn't want him to merely forget his suffering as the name Manasseh implied; He wanted him to be fruitful in his suffering as the name Ephraim implied.

It is the same with you and with me. God does not want us to simply forget the pain of the past. He wants us to be fruitful in the land of our suffering! Use it for good. Minister to others. Plant seeds of hope.

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, I thank You that nothing is ever wasted in our life experiences. The world says, "Just forget about it" when it comes to our past struggles. You say, "Just use it! Be fruitful!" Show me ways that I can use what I have gone through to help other people. Lord I pray that You will make me fruitful in the land of my suffering.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Have you simply tried to just forget about your past? It doesn't work, does it?

What have you gone through in your life that you could now use to help someone else?

Read Romans 8:28. What do you think that means in light of the hurts and pains in your past?

Now read 2 Corinthians 1:3-4. Here's how I summarize that verse: God doesn't comfort me to make me comfortable. He comforts me to make me comfort-able.

Want God to use you in a mighty way? Click over to my Facebook page and leave a comment that says: I want to be comfort-able.

More from the Girlfriends:

God longs for you to do more than just "forget about it." He wants you to turn those "all things" that Romans 8:28 talks about into ministry opportunities! Sister, when you begin to use your past mistakes and hurts for the glory of God, Satan has no more power over you! He can't use it against you any longer. I don't know about you, but that makes me want to shout! Are you ready to turn your hurt into hope, your pain into purpose, and your messes into ministry? Then see my book, Your Scars are Beautiful to God: Finding Peace and Purpose in the Hurts of Your Past. I'll be cheering you on!

:angel:h

[Judy Harder]

June 12, 2014
Trusting God with the Future
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal (2 Corinthians 4:18, NIV).

Friend to Friend

In an effort to escape the brutal summer heat of South Florida, our family headed to the beautiful mountains of North Carolina. The Blue Ridge Parkway is one of our favorite spots for hiking, so we planned a day trip that included exploring a few hiking trails, a picnic and a visit to the beautiful and historic colonial home of Carl Sandburg. We woke to discover the beautiful weather of the day before had dissolved into a soupy mix of drizzle and fog, but we were not about to let a little fog and rain deter us from our original plan. We had been vacationing in North Carolina for years and knew fog is a common occurrence – even in the summer. We piled into our van and made our way up the mountain. The closer we got to the Sandburg home, the heavier the fog became. In fact, when we arrived, the fog was so thick we could barely see the walkway leading to the gift shop where we needed to purchase tickets for the tour of the home and grounds. We decided we would have to come back another day for the tour, but since we were already at the gift shop, it wouldn't hurt to do a little browsing.

The shop owner greeted us warmly and asked if we would like to purchase tickets for the guided tour scheduled to leave in an hour. Always the diplomat, I responded, "Are you kidding me? Have you looked outside?" The owner smiled and said, "Oh, you mean the fog? It will be gone in a little while. Now – how many tickets do you need?" I don't like pushy salesmen, even when they are sweet and kind – and maybe a little near-sighted. "I think we will just wait and see if the fog actually lifts," I responded, convinced the thick fog would last all day, and resumed my browsing. I lost track of time and was surprised to hear the owner announce, "The tour is leaving in 15 minutes. This is our final call for tickets." I walked out of the gift shop to discover the fog really was lifting and the skies were actually beginning to clear. I couldn't believe my eyes! Within minutes, the sun was shining - as if the fog had never existed.

It sometimes feels as if the fog of doubt and fear of darkness will never lift from our lives. The promises of God seem to get swallowed up by the problems we face. We want to curse our crisis – not praise God in the midst of that crisis. The hurt and pain overwhelm our faith, and we lose sight of the fact that this world is not our home and the troubles we face are only temporary. Lift up your eyes, girlfriend. Fix your heart and mind on God – He is with you – and makes every problem point to a promise.

Promise of direction  Proverbs 20:30 "Sometimes it takes a painful situation to make us change our ways."

God uses problems to show us the way. We would walk through the wrong door if He didn't close it. Years ago, I dated a young man I thought I would marry. I began to pray, "Lord, if he is not the one, just close the door." The very next conversation I had with this young man ended our relationship and resulted in my taking a church staff position that led me to Dan Southerland.

Promise of correction  Psalm 119:71-72 "It was the best thing that could have happened to me, for it taught me to pay attention to your laws."

God uses problems to correct us. When our daughter was a toddler, she was fascinated with electrical outlets. Nothing we said or did seemed to deter her ... until the day she stuck a safety pin in the outlet. "Ouch!" she cried, holding up her little red finger for me to kiss. She never played with an outlet again. 

Promise of protection  Genesis 50:20 "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good."

A problem can be a blessing in disguise if it keeps you from being hurt by something more serious. I dreaded taking our children to get their immunization shots. I took a healthy child to the doctor and came home with a little one who was fussy, sore and running a low grade temperature. Our pediatrician finally said, "Mary, think of it like this. You are allowing your babies to experience a little hurt in order to prevent them from experiencing a bigger hurt. A tetanus shot is nothing compared to tetanus itself."

Promise of perfection  Romans 5:3-4 "We can rejoice when we run into problems ... they help us learn to be patient. And patience develops strength of character in us and helps us trust God more each time we use it until finally our hope and faith are strong and steady."

Problems, when responded to correctly, are character builders. I once spoke for a women's conference with the theme of "Problems into Pearls." The leader welcomed me and said, "We have to get you some pearls!" Digging in her purse, she produced a beautiful pearl necklace for me to wear. I spoke several times, counseled and prayed with numerous women and tried to meet as many women as possible. When the woman came to retrieve her pearl necklace, I was embarrassed. I had worked up quite a sweat with all of that hugging, laughing, talking. She brushed my apology aside and said, "Sweat is good for pearls. It helps them keep their luster."

God is at work in and around you. You may not see His hand, hear His voice or even understand His process, but you can rest assured that you can trust His heart. Remember, every problem points to a promise.

Let's Pray

Lord, I am tired of trying to face my problems in my own strength. Today, I choose to fix my gaze on You and praise You for Your presence and power in my life. I will give You praise, knowing You take up residence in the praises of Your people. I will walk through my fear, knowing You are with me. I declare my belief in Your willingness to help me face anything that comes my way. I trust You with my problems, Lord.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read each of the following verses. Choose at least one to memorize and record in your journal.

Psalm 121:1-2 (NIV) "I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth."

Psalm 46:1 (NIV) "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble."

Psalm 63:7-8 (NIV) "Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me."