Girlfriends in God

[Judy Harder]

June 26, 2013
No Time for Rest
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul... (Psalm 23:1-3, NIV)

Friend to friend

For most of my adult life, I have wrongly equated being busy with being productive. I am guilty as charged when it comes to living each day in overdrive. My Day Timer has, at times, been my Bible. The result has always, always been exhaustion, burnout and watered down living. Everything looked great on the outside, but when I was alone, just God and me, we both knew that the façade I had so carefully erected was a spiritual monument to self promotion and pride-filled goals. The house built upon the sand seemed like very familiar digs - and I was not alone.

We are all masters of rationalizing our way to approval. The problem is that the approval we gain comes from impotent and lifeless sources. I am convinced that if we are willing to surrender our lives to the tyranny of the urgent, the enemy will keep them coming – people who need you immediately, those who clamor for your attention above your family and personal relationship with God, the person who can talk to no one but you, and the list goes on. What ego strokes they offer! And what futility.

I have always loved music and began taking piano lessons at the age of five. I will never forget that first piano lesson with Mrs. McKenzie, a very sweet elderly woman who played the piano beautifully. Her hair was slightly blue, her house smelled like lemon drops, and she had clocks that chimed and rang every fifteen minutes. I was so excited and so ready to play the piano like my sister who played for our church worship services. Betty was amazing and I was desperately hoping that same musical ability ran in our family.

"Let's get started," Mrs. McKenzie said. I climbed up on the piano bench, waiting for her brilliant instruction to begin. She placed a bright, red piano book in front of me and invited me to open it to the first page. I was disappointed to see only little, black pictures.

Where was the music?

Where were the songs?

Mrs. McKenzie smiled as she patiently began to explain the musical symbols pictured in the book before me. I soon grew restless. "What's the matter?" she asked. "I want to play the piano, please," I sweetly responded. With a knowing smile, she said, "We'll get to that." I wasn't happy.

On and on – for what seemed like hours, Mrs. McKenzie pointed to funny-shaped black symbols, named them and explained their meaning. I was not impressed. I just wanted to get my hands on that keyboard.

Sensing my impatience, Mrs. McKenzie pointed to one of the symbols on the page before me and said, "Mary, this small, black box is called a 'rest' and is one of the most important symbols in music." I simply didn't care. It did nothing but sit on a page in useless and unproductive silence. I wanted music.

"Do you know why rests are so important in music?" she persisted. Obviously, I had no clue. She then said something I remember to this day, "The music that comes after the rest is the most beautiful music of all." At the time, I didn't understand the deeper meaning of those words, but life and time have illustrated their importance and their truth.

The best part of life comes after we rest in God. The most beautiful service follows time at His feet. Rest is a powerful part of our life song. Just as the rest in music prepares the listener for what comes next, time spent in rest is an invaluable time of preparation and restoration. Yet, we often buy the enemy's lie that to rest is a waste. The psalmist disagrees when he writes, "He makes me to lie down in green pastures...He restores my soul..." (Psalm 23:2-3) Understand that if we refuse to rest, the Father will "make" us rest. The good news is that time spent in rest is the prelude of God's restoration. 

For years, I lived by the principle that busy people are productive people. It was only after I crashed and burned that I learned the eternal value of rest and stillness. This pivotal life lesson is stated in the simple words of a shepherd: Psalm 23:2 "He leads me beside quiet waters." The psalmist writes this soothing promise from the perspective of a shepherd tending his flock of sheep.

A good shepherd understands the truth that sheep are never fully at ease around rushing water because every sheep innately knows that the weight of their wool – when wet – will drown them. A wise shepherd understands that he must lead his sheep beside still waters, to a place of rest. The sheep only has to follow.

Let's Pray

Dear Father, help me to accept and understand the fact that You created me with a need for rest. Help me to be obedient and not feel guilty when I do rest. I want to do what You want me to do, Father. I want to do Your will and follow the plan You have for me. I accept the physical limitations of my body and choose to honor You with it by setting aside time to rest.

In Jesus's name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Choose a time and place where you can rest.

Give yourself permission to rest, remembering that the choice to rest is a choice to obey God.

Read Psalm 23 every day and journal the benefits of rest in your life.

More from the Girlfriends

Need help? Check out Mary's E-Book Bible Study, How to Find Your Missing Peace. And be sure to check out Mary's NEW weekly Online Bible Study, From a Mess to a Miracle, beginning July 8. Enroll now and have access to all 2013 lessons.

[Judy Harder]

June 27, 2013
Potluck Heaven
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

"There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus," (Galatians 3:28 NIV).

Friend to Friend

I recall as a young child time spent rocking on my grandma's front porch and listening to the ladies from the missions society gossip about the heathens whose church was across the street from theirs. It always puzzled me because the heathens seemed like such nice people and their church looked just like Grandma's. As far as I could tell, there was no difference. Both believed in Jesus, wore funny hats on Sundays, and sang the same hymns. And both had great potluck dinners.

How did the church come up with the notion of the infamous potluck supper? As best I can tell, it all began in the fifteenth chapter of Matthew. The first gathering was a great success as Jesus served more than 4000 men, not to mention a few thousand women and children, and had leftovers to boot. All this came from one little covered dish. Actually, it was a covered basket. This was, after all, before the advent of Corning ware.

Later, the Baptists followed His lead, and the next thing you know, all denominations were celebrating a multiplicity of occasions with every variety of casserole known to man. But the twenty-first-century church isn't being caught simply serving up fish-and-chips. We have taken the notion of breaking bread and run with it. Not only do we break bread, but we crunch fried chicken, munch fresh veggies, scoop casseroles, slice pies, cut cakes, and sip coffees. We chew the fat while chewing our food and extend the right hand of fellowship while our left hand extends the serving spoon. I'd say that covered-dish dinners are one of the most cherished rituals in the church today.

One Christmas our Sunday school had a potluck dinner at the McMillians' home. Our class consisted of 150 people in a church of 1600. Because it's a little difficult to be intimate with 150 congregants on a Sunday morning, the Christmas party was a great time to chat with people you didn't normally have a chance to speak to otherwise. And because people tend to sit in the same seats each week, I'd never actually had a good look at about half of the class. The Christmas party was designed to remedy that problem.

Marshall and Denise's home was beautifully decorated with holly, spruce, and magnolia clippings. It was filled with the sights, sounds, and smells of the season as well as the incoming aroma of the many delicious prepared meals. In an effort to provide crowd control and proper traffic flow, our host, Marshall, had posted directional signs around the house. One sign read "COATS," with an arrow pointing up the stairs to their daughter's room. Another read "HOT FOOD," with an arrow pointing toward the kitchen.

Marshall was doing a great job at his post as official greeter and traffic police.

"Hello, how are you?" he said, greeting two ladies and one man as they made their way up the front steps with dishes in hand. "You can take your food into the kitchen and then follow the arrows up the stairs to the coat room."

The obedient threesome followed directions well and then headed to the name tag table. But something didn't seem quite right.

"Marshall," I said, "who are those people? I don't recognize them."       

"I don't recognize them either, Sharon. But our class is so big. Maybe they sit on the other side of the room and we just haven't noticed them before."

They looked as though they could have been one of us. They seemed to know the drill. But something still felt strange.

"Just the same, go find out who they are," I urged.

Marshall approached the trio, who were now looking a little bewildered themselves. "Excuse me. Youare here for the Sunday school Christmas party, aren't you?"

"Yes," they answered. However, their yes sounded more like a question than an answer. Then they asked, "This is the Sunday school class for First Baptist Church, isn't it?"

"No, ma'am," Marshall answered. "This is the party for a different church. You folks are at the wrong place."

Quickly the three embarrassed Baptists reclaimed their food, once again followed the arrows to the coat room, and hightailed it out of the McMillians' house to another Sunday school covered-dish gathering a few doors down.

Won't heaven be an interesting place? One big, perpetual, brightly-lit celebration of new birth. No covered dish required because God will sit us down at His banqueting table which He has prepared for us. One great thing about this party will be that when the Methodists stumble into a room full of Presbyterians, no one will feel out of place. The Episcopalians will be chewing the fat with the Primitive Baptists, the Assemblies of God will be singing with the Lutherans, and the Church of God folks will be dancing with the Congregationalists.

And when each new saint arrives, we'll hear, "Welcome! Come on in. Take your coat off and stay a while—an eternity, for that matter. You're definitely in the right place."

Let's Pray
Dear Lord, forgive us for how we have separated ourselves as believers. Help us to see each brother and sister in Christ as dearly loved children of God.

In Jesus' name, amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Isn't heaven going to be fun? I can hardly wait!

Wikipedia tells me that there are around 41,000 different Christian (or so-called Christian) denominations. That's a lot. Oh my.

Did you know that one of the pillars of Girlfriends in God is to cross generational, racial, and denominational boundaries to join the Body of Christ together as believers?

Today, I want to encourage you to memorize today's truth. It is important.

And while you're at it, here's another one that is from my heart to yours: 1 Corinthians 2:2. Click over to my blog post and tell me what that means to you as a Christian. www.sharonjaynes.com.

More from the Girlfriends

Do you love a good story? I do! Stories tug at the heart and open the eyes to the truths of Scripture in a way only God can do. I have complied 100 of my favorite stories and devotions into one book titled, Listening to God Day-by-Day. It is the perfect book for a quick pick-me-up before you start your busy day or a sweet dreams closure before you turn off the bedside lamp at night. And here's some good news, this book is specially priced for the month of June. Get one for yourself, and we'll include another free for you to share. It won't show up on your receipt, but we'll make sure it is included in your package.

[Judy Harder]

June 28, 2013
Do You Remember Me?
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.(Isaiah 49:15-16, NIV)

Friend to Friend

I'll be the first to admit that I am a woman who is easily distracted. More times than I care to even discuss. Sigh. I would love to say that the detail-oriented-woman in me rocks my days, but that's not always the case. One crazy day, a few years back, the absent-minded-scatter-brain in me dominated big time.  Here's what happened...

After I dropped my kids off at school, I swung into the local gas station and ran inside to prepay.  I handed the cashier forty dollars in cash and headed out the door to pump my gas.  As I left the mini-mart, I held the door for the woman behind me.  As she passed in front of me, we recognized each other.  She is the secretary for a local church where I had ministered in the past.  We chatted for a few minutes and then each went to our cars and went about our days.

My next stop?  The coffee shop.

I grabbed a piping hot dark roast, added a happy little splash of half and half, and settled down with my Bible and journal for some one-on-One time with the Lord.  In the hour and a half that followed, I read, prayed, and chatted with a few friends that came through. It was a very peaceful, pleasant morning... until a horrible realization hit me full force:  I never pumped my forty dollars worth of gasoline!

Oh. My. Glory.

I had pulled up to the gas pump, paid the cashier, and then drove away!!  And, to answer the question you're surely asking, "no...I didn't even have a receipt to prove that I had paid." This was not good. The detail-oriented-woman in me hid as the distracted-absent-minded-woman in me snickered.

A cold panic washed over my heart. I felt awful. My husband and I run our household with on a cash budget.  We try our best to be good stewards of our money. To make wise financial decisions.  This was a possible forty-dollar blunder!!

In a flash I was out the door and on my way back to the gas station.  I felt like such a ding-dong!  I prayed the whole way there, "Please Lord, let the same cashier still be working.  Please let her remember me!" I screeched into the parking lot on two wheels, ran inside, and blurted out, "Do you remember me?"  The cashier turned to me with a smile and a receipt in her hand and said, "I know exactly who you are!  You are paid in full.  Go ahead and fill up!" I thanked her and breathed a big sigh of relief.

As I pumped my gasoline, the panic faded to peace.  In that moment, the Lord spoke to my heart as if to say, "My sweet daughter, so many times you pull up a chair to spend time with me and fill up your soul on my daily bread, only to be distracted and leave empty. Rest assured, each time you return to my heart and to my Word, my response is the same to you: "I know exactly who you are!  You are paid in full.  Go ahead and fill up!"

Let's Pray

Holy Father, Who am I, that You are mindful of me? Thank You for always remembering me, for engraving my name on the palms of your hands. Would you please be my portion today?

Now It's Your Turn

Is there a place of panic in your heart that needs to be handed to the Prince of Peace?  Pause to pray about it now.

God knows everything about you and His love is inescapable. Read all about it in Psalm 139. Write down the verse that moves your heart the most today. Commit it to memory and share it with a few friends today!

Got a story about a time when your panic faded to peace? Got a prayer need? Join me on my blog pageor my Facebook page to take the conversation deeper.

More from the Girlfriends

So many times we feel like failures because we don't have a consistent quiet time with God. If this is you, don't be discouraged. Romans 8:1, reminds us that there is no condemnation in Christ. Yes, God wants your attention...but not to scold you...He wants to hold you. You can trust Him.

We really need to learn to trust God, and that can sometimes be hard. Need help? Order a copy of our GiG book, Trusting God, A Girlfriends in God Faith Adventure. This is the perfect book for individual study or for gathering a group of friends in what we call GiG Groups. With impactful devotions, study questions, journal pages, free on-line video intros, and an index of trust-building Scriptures, this book is a resource you'll refer to time-and-time again.

[Judy Harder]

July 1, 2013
He Took My Place
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

Praise the LORD. Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever (Psalm 106:1, NIV).

Friend to Friend

It seems like so many people are in pain, facing trials that seem impossible to handle. I hear from them every day.

The biopsy was malignant. A woman discovers that her husband is having an affair. Lonely but committed soldiers covered in the dust of battle patrol foreign borders, fighting for our freedom while their families back home long for word of their safety. The homeless make their way to the nearest soup kitchen, hoping for a warm meal and a smiling face. An empty place at the dinner table is a painful reminder of the loved one lost not long ago. A worried husband and dad sits at the head of the table, wondering how he is going to tell his family that he just lost his job. The list of wounded hearts and unmet needs is endless.

We convince ourselves that life will be better when we have more money, when we find the right mate, when we get the kids raised, or when we build the right house. We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, when we get that promotion, when we are able to go on our dream vacation, or when we retire. We keep trying to find joy, contentment and peace in lifeless places and things.

Jesus Christ is life. He is Joy and Love and He took our place on the cross.  That's why we can give thanks when it seems as if there is nothing for which to be thankful.

One day, a man went to visit a church. He arrived early, parked his car, and got out.  Another car pulled up near him, and the driver said, "I always park there. You took my place!" The visitor went inside for Sunday school, found an empty seat, and sat down.  A young lady from the church approached him and stated, "That's my seat! You took my place!" The visitor was somewhat distressed by this rude welcome, but said nothing.

After Sunday school, the visitor went into the church sanctuary and sat down. Another member walked up to him and said, "That's where I always sit. You took my place!" The visitor was even more troubled by this treatment, but still said nothing.

Later, as the congregation was praying for Christ to dwell among them, the visitor stood, and his appearance began to change. Horrible scars became visible on his hands and on his sandaled feet. Someone from the congregation noticed him and called out, "What happened to you?" The visitor replied, "I took your place."

Yes, we live in a broken world and life is filled with pain, challenges, dark times and trials, but today can still be a day of thanksgiving and praise because praise and thanksgiving have little to do with our circumstances and everything to do with our inner attitude toward God. It really doesn't matter how much we lose here, girlfriend. I have read the Book and we win ... for all of eternity! We just need to take the time to remember ... and give thanks.

Let's Pray

Father, we come to You today, praising You for meeting our needs in ways that we may or may not understand at the time. Looking back, we see Your hand of mercy and love.  We recognize Your presence and your power and we celebrate You ...we celebrate life.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Take time for an attitude check. Examine your heart for any traces of discontentment. Change your focus to the good things God has done in and through you. Praise Him for each blessing and celebrate His goodness.

Read and memorize 1 Thessalonians 5:18 that says, "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." Record this verse in your journal. Circle the word "all" and think about what that means in your life. Make a new commitment to develop an attitude of gratitude that is based on the presence and power of God in your life.

More from the Girlfriends

Need help? Check out Mary's E-Book Bible Study, How to Find Your Missing Peace. And be sure to check out Mary's NEW weekly Online Bible Study, From a Mess to a Miracle, beginning July 8. Enroll now and have access to all 2013 lessons.

[Judy Harder]

July 2, 2013
The Danger of Pointing Fingers
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?" (Matthew 7:3-4 NIV).

Friend to Friend

I couldn't believe it. The announcement of one of the most important days of my life...my dream come true...and there was a misprint! A horrible misprint. My husband and I were married in a small eastern North Carolina town on a beautiful August afternoon. There's not a lot going on in Rocky Mount, so weddings and funerals receive full coverage. My wedding picture, in all its bridal glory, was a 4 x 5 crisp black-and-white photo displayed in the local section of the paper. Under my smiling face read the caption: Mrs. Steven Hush Jaynes.

I was mortified! My mother-in-law did not have a lapse in judgment when Steve was born. She did not name him Hush. His middle name is Hugh. Oh my goodness. What were those people thinking? How could they be so careless? Didn't they realize I would cut that picture out and place it in my wedding album for all eternity? Didn't they understand the teasing that would surely follow that misprint? Didn't they understand how important this was? Hush! I was furious.

My only hope was that the even smaller town where I was actually born would also run the wedding announcement. They did. A few days after discovering the "Hush" dilemma, the tiny newspaper from Spring Hope, North Carolina, arrived. I unfolded the page and there, as big as day, was my wedding picture. This one was 5 x 7. And underneath it read...Mrs. Steven Hush Jaynes. Oh my glory! Now I was crying.

On the same day I received the newspaper from my husband's hometown of more than 500,000 people. Underneath my itty-bitty wedding picture were the words...you guessed it...Mrs. Steven Hush Jaynes!

Suddenly the truth began to sink in. This was not the error of inept newspapers. It was my fault. When I print, I'm a bit sloppy, and my g seldom closes, looking like an s. I guess it looks a lot like an s. So now it was time for me to hush.

Have you ever been in a situation where you were blaming someone for a mishap and suddenly realized you were the one at fault? Jesus said it this way, "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?" (Matthew 7:3-4).

I have since learned that when you point a finger at someone, there are at least three other fingers pointing back at yourself. The best way to avoid that is not to point the finger at someone in the first place.

Jesus went on to say, "First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye" (Matthew 7:5). I don't know about you, but I have plenty of sawdust in my own life to keep me busy.

I still put the newspaper announcements in our wedding album. It is a great reminder of two truths. Number one: August 16, 1980, was one of the happiest days of my life. Number two:
When I start casting blame or pointing fingers, I need to take a good look in the mirror and hush.

How are you in the finger-pointing department? Here's an idea. When feeling the urge to point a finger and place blame on someone, fold your hands together and pray instead. What God reveals might be surprising.

Let's Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, sometimes I am too quick to blame someone else for my mistakes. Help me to always examine my own heart and let You take care of the rest. Thank You for the embarrassing reminders that I am a work in progress and You are not finished with me yet. In Jesus' Name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read Matthew 7:1-6 to put today's truth into context.

Think of a time when you blamed someone for something and then discovered you were the one to blame?

Ask God to reveal any specks, splinters, or "ginormous" planks in your own eye that you might be overlooking.

I have so many crazy stories, someone asked me if they were all true. Yep. They are. If you want a good laugh, click over to my blog page and see my wedding picture. Mrs. Hush Jaynes in all her glory.

More from the Girlfriends

If you want to learn more about how to use your words to speak life into those around you, how to encourage and not discourage, see my book The Power of a Woman's Words.There is also an accompanying Bible study guide and DVD which is perfect for your next women's Bible study group.

[Judy Harder]

July 3, 2013
In His Steps
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth

Be careful what you do, and always do what is right (Proverbs 4:26, NCV).

Friend To Friend

When Dan and I first married, I knew almost nothing about football. In fact, I would often ask, "Honey, who has the ball now?" He was so patient, answering every question without bursting into laughter. Dan's favorite team was the Dallas Cowboys and his favorite player was Emmitt Smith, their star running back at the time.

During one particular game, Emmitt was playing on grass instead of the artificial turf he preferred. The grass was wet, and Emmett was not playing his best game, falling down two plays out of three. Frustrated with his performance, Emmett took himself out of the game to change cleats. It didn't help. In fact, it took three cleat changes before he found the ones that gave him the best footing. He then went on to play a phenomenal game and lead his team to victory.

Obedience puts us on solid ground. God is not asking us for a season of obedience. He wants a lifestyle of obedience.

Will Rogers once said, "Live your life in such a way, that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." In Proverbs 3:6-7 (NCV) Solomon wrote, "Remember the Lord in all you do, and He will give you success. Don't depend on your own wisdom. Respect the LORD and refuse to do wrong." Obedience is remembering and choosing God in everything we do, choosing to walk in His steps and following the path He has set for us.

We are to live like citizens of a future world, guarding each step to make sure it matches the step of God. Not out of fear but out of love. Not because man observes and keeps score, but because God watches and we want to please Him. "Obey God because you are his children. Don't slip back into your old ways of doing evil; you didn't know any better then." (Peter 1:14, NLT). We cannot come to Christ and continue to respond to the world in the same way. Our behavior will change along with our perspective, our standards, our motives – everything. As Paul says, we become "a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" (2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV). This holy discipline sounds like an impossible and overwhelming command. It is – outside the power of God.               

Our son played football for many years. Different coaches tried to get Jered to play different positions, but they always ended up playing him as a fullback. College recruiters said he was a "throwback" and explained that Jered was built like a true fullback; he ran like a true fullback and thought like a true fullback. Consequently, he rarely fumbled the ball, explaining his success in a way I remember to this day: "Most players who carry the ball either make the mistake of trying to create their own route or end up following the wrong guy. I have blockers assigned to me on every play. Their job is to make a path for me. The minute I get the ball, I put my head down, look for my blockers, watch their feet and follow them - right across the goal line."

God has already been where He wants us to go. All we have to do is look for Him, watch His steps and follow them – right across the finish line. Discipline your steps, making sure that they match His.

Let's Pray

Father, I want to obey You. Forgive me when I let fear keep me from walking in Your steps or when I listen for the voice of others above Yours. Give me a hunger and thirst for Your Word so that I can grow up in You and become a mature believer that honors You with her life. Give me the strength and power to step out in faith.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read Psalm 86:11. "Teach me your way, LORD, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name" (NIV).

The psalmist prays for an "undivided heart." Examine your own heart. Is it divided? What does that mean to you and how does it impact your walk with God?

Read Romans 10:17. "Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ" (NIV).

How does the Word of God impact the strength of your faith?

More from the Girlfriends

Mary's MP3 download, Stepping Out in Faith, will help you discover a new confidence in God and the power of obedience to Him. And be sure to check out Mary's new weekly Online Bible StudyFrom a Mess to a Miracle beginning July 8.Enroll now and have access to all 2013 lessons. And be sure to connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

[Judy Harder]

July 4, 2013
How are Your Knee Jerk Reactions?
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

"...train yourself to be godly," (1Timothy 4:7 NIV).

Friend to Friend

It was hot. The traffic was heavy. I was young and distracted.

I was driving alone in the flow of vacationer traffic traveling to and from the North Carolina coast. I was in the group headed for home. The July traffic was bumper-to-bumper, with everyone going faster than the posted speed limit. I had other things on my mind besides maneuvering in traffic and was paying little attention to the cars around me. (OK, inside scoop. My boyfriend and I had just broken up. Crying my twenty-year-old eyes out.)

Traveling 60 miles per hour in my sporty two-tone Pontiac Sunbird, I felt my front right tire slip off of the asphalt and onto the gravel shoulder of the road. In a flood of panic, I heard the voice of my Driver's Ed teacher from four years before, "If you run off the road, do not, and I repeat, do not jerk your car back on the road. Slow to a stop and then gently guide the car back on the road."

My mind knew the rule. I was even repeating, "Do not jerk the car. Do not jerk the car." Then I promptly jerked the car. I pulled the steering wheel to the left, jerked the car onto the road, and lost control. First the Sunbird flew across two lanes of traffic to the left and then, after over-correcting again, she flew back off the road to the right. As if in slow motion, the car began a descent down an embankment.

The weight of the car became unbalanced and began to roll like a toy tossed by an angry child. As the car somersaulted down the embankment, my body tossed and tumbled like a rag doll, bouncing around the car's interior. The seatbelt law wasn't in effect yet, and I wasn't wearing mine. When the car landed upside down at the bottom of the embankment, I was sitting on the ceiling on the passenger's side.

Travelers watched aghast as the scenario played out before them. You can imagine how amazed they were to see me crawl out of the car's open window without a scratch, holding my Jade plant I had purchased the day before. I knew, without a doubt, that I should not have lived through that accident. It was only by the grace of God that I survived.

Thinking back on that event, I am reminded how powerful reflexes are. When the car veered off the road, I knew what to do, but I did the opposite. I knew not to jerk the steering wheel, but I did it anyway.

Sometimes we know in our heads what we are supposed to do, but the reflexes of old programming overcome reason. The Bible tells us that when we come to Christ, we are a new a creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). However, no one pushes the delete button to erase old habit patterns that have been formed over time. Only through prayer and practice can we retrain our old ways and habits to form new godly reflexes that will reflect the nature of Christ.

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, why do I do what I don't want to do and not do what I want to do? Help me train my spiritual reflexes so that my initial reaction and response to every situation is a reflection of Your character and Your ways. In Jesus' name, amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read Romans 7 and discover Paul's struggle with his knee jerk reactions.

What did he say was the answer to his problem of not doing what he knew he should do and doing what he knew he shouldn't do? Hint: It is at the end of the chapter.

What do you learn about changing your default reactions to godly reactions in 1 Timothy 4:7-16?

More from the Girlfriends

How are your knee jerk reactions? What is your emotional default mode? If you would like to learn how to act like the new creation the Bible says you are, then check out my book, Becoming Spiritually Beautiful: Seeing Yourself as God Sees You. It will help you to learn how to live fully and free!

[Judy Harder]

July 5, 2013
Learning To Breathe
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
Discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness. (1 Timothy 4:7b, NASB)

Friend to Friend
Before our first child was born, my husband and I took a series of classes to prepare us for childbirth. I vividly remember being told by my Lamaze instructor that while in labor, I would need to breathe through each contraction. She would give us instructions like: "Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth" and "When you inhale, allow your belly to expand first, then your chest." She told us that the way we breathe would affect the way we would experience labor.

We spent a lot of time during those week-after-week classes learning how to breathe in a whole new way. We were taught that the breaths we would take during labor would need to be purposed and controlled. They required discipline and were not like natural breathing. So I practiced and I practiced the special breathing techniques in preparation for when the labor pains came a-knocking.

When the day arrived to welcome my firstborn son, Preston Miles Smith, into the world, I learned what a discipline breathing through contractions really is! There were times during labor that I felt like holding my breath instead of breathing. Times when the pain was so intense that my natural response was to scream instead of to breathe. Yes. This type of breathing was surely a learned behavior, a purposed discipline. And on the other side of this purposed discipline, in spite of all the pain endured, I was blessed to experience the wonderful joy of life.

I've labored through many hard life experiences since my child birthing days. I'm sure you have too. There are times when circumstances press us in waves, contractions of life that are seemingly endless. When the waves of trials hit our heart and home, the spiritual discipline of trusting God helps us to breathe through the squeeze of each pressure. I like to call it faith-breathing. When we hunker down and put into practice the act – the discipline – of faith.

But what do we mean by "the discipline of faith?" Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever (1 Corinthians 9:24-25).

Just like I learned to breathe in preparation for going through labor pains, Christians learn to breathe through life pains when we implement spiritual disciplines in our lives like prayer, fasting, journaling and Scripture reading. They are purposed disciplines that bring joy and strength. The more we pray, the more we grow in intimacy with God. The more we read and know the Bible, the more we understand God's will and character. We see over and over again that He is good, faithful, compassionate, loving, gentle, just, holy, righteous and trustworthy in all things. We are encouraged and spurred on by the faith of others. We learn to faith-breathe!     

The flames of fire have heated up and refined my faith on many occasions! Life is filled with challenges. God is always with us and will help us breathe through the difficult situations we face. He allows us to go through trials as a part of our refining process. Struggles send us running to God for help, for faith, for strength, for protection and direction. They are often pregnant with pain. Bursting with heartache. If we yield them to God, He uses to rid our lives of trust-barriers like fear and doubt, and to bring glory and honor to him. There are many life contractions that hurt us, but there is no earthly pain that can diminish the hope of our salvation. We must simply breath – continue practicing those spiritual disciplines that bind us to the heart of God.

Trusting God takes discipline. We don't always feel like it. It's not always what we want to do. It's not natural. At times we feel overwhelmed and want to soul-scream. If we always acted on our feelings, our lives would be chaotic messes. As in childbirth, there finally comes the time of deliverance where what is birthed forth to joy is directly the result of the very pain we have gone through.

Let's Pray
Dear Father, please teach me to breath! Strengthen me through life's hard labor experiences and help me to practice the disciplines I have learned through your Scriptures. When I feel like screaming through the pain, help me to breath by reading and memorizing your Word, fasting and praying, and meditating on your Truth. Thank you for the strength you will give me as I trust in You.

In Jesus' Name I pray,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read over the verses below and write them on note card and review them until they are committed to memory.

"...all things are possible with God" (Mark 10:27b).

"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13).

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." (Psalm 119:11)

[Judy Harder]

July 8, 2013
On Our Way Home
Mary Southerland

Today's Truth           

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:4-7).                                                 

Friend to Friend

Have you noticed how hard "re-entry" is?

One of my favorite movies is "Apollo 13" in which we first heard those famous words, "Houston, we have a problem," an understatement if there ever was one. The astronauts faced seemingly impossible odds of getting back to earth, but they refused to give up the fight until they finally and safely splashed down in the waters of home.

Life is much the same. We are often thrust into a daily life of foreign and often frightening worlds, shaky circumstances, and impossible trials with no obvious way of escape. It seems like we will never get home and our world will never be right again.

I have discovered a truth that surfaces in my heart on a continual basis. We all come into this world with a sense of being lost. Tucked into the corner of our souls is a feeling of restlessness ... a longing for home, for something eternal. That longing will never be satisfied outside of a relationship with God. He holds each today and every tomorrow in His hands. Nobody and nothing can fill the "God-shaped" hole in our heart.

I have come to cherish that desperate heart cry that drives me to my knees and into the arms of my Father. Each and every time I come to Him, He whispers, "It will be all right. You are not home - yet."

I do not want this broken and torn world to be my final home, but merely a place I am passing through. While I am here, I have a God-sized job to do, an extraordinary mission to complete and a wonderful purpose to fulfill. Is that awesome or what? Absolutely! But it is only the beginning of the eternity for which I was created. And the same is true for you. It doesn't get any better than that, girlfriend.

So as you dive into your hectic schedule, remember that one day, we will be home - with Him - but until then, let's celebrate here! Guard your heart and mind by filling them with God's Word. Hold fast to the true meaning of a purpose driven life, and don't let go! Look for ways to share the Good News that Jesus Christ is the way, the truth and the life. Share the message of the manger, embracing that longing for home as a sweet reminder that one day we will celebrate His birth in Heaven. What a day that will be!

And remember - we are on our way home!

Let's Pray                   

Oh God, I love You and am so thankful for the hope that eternity holds because I know You. I am not alone, nor will I ever be. I will lack nothing because You are my Provider. I can sing in the midst of the storm because You are sufficient. I praise You and long for Home. But while I'm here, help me to be all that You created me to be.

In Jesus' name,

Amen!

Now It's Your Turn 

Have you ever experienced loneliness or a sense of loss for no apparent reason? The best way to get ready for a difficult time is to stay ready for a difficult time. In other words, now is the time to prepare your heart and mind for the circumstance or trial that triggers discouragement.

Make time each day to be alone with God.
Pour out your dreams and desperation to Him.
Read Psalm 23 once a day.
Invest at least 15 minutes in solitude each day, allowing your soul to "catch up."
Make a list of the top five joy thieves in your life and make a plan to eliminate them. 
Prayerfully choose five verses of Scripture about peace. Write these verses on a 3X5 card and carry it with you. In fact, this would be a great family project for the summer.
More from the Girlfriends

Do not allow anyone or anything to steal your joy. The choice is in your hands. Need help? Check out Mary's E-Bible study, God's Answer to Stress, and let it help you learn to manage stress instead of allowing it to manage you.

And be sure to check out Mary's new weekly Online Bible StudyFrom a Mess to a Miracle. Enroll now and have access to all 2013 lessons. And be sure to connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

[Judy Harder]

July 9, 2013
Put a Lid on It
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth

"... tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark," (James 3:5 NIV).

Friend to Friend

From the time I could hold a crayon in my chubby little hand, I've enjoyed creating various works of art. For my family and friends, my annual endeavors usually found their way under the Christmas tree and into their hands. One year it was macramé hanging plant holders, woven with wooden beads. Another, it was a menagerie of decoupage wooden boxes. Then there were the years of framed cross-stitch, ceramic Nativity sets, and quilted pig and chicken pillows.

When I was 17, it was the year of the candle. Everyone from Grandma Edwards to my best girlfriends received praying hands candles. For weeks I slaved over a hot stove, stirring melted wax, meticulously centering the ten-inch wicks, and then slowly pouring the red, green, or yellow molten material into an inverted mold in the shape of praying hands. When the wax hardened, I burped the rubber mold and plopped the hands onto the counter. My kitchen looked like a prostheses laboratory with hands littering the counters.

I was just cooking up my last batch of wax when the doorbell rang. I was having so much fun that I had forgotten the time. I had a date at 7:30, and here I was in pink curlers and a paraffin-covered sweatshirt. I rushed through the kitchen, leaped over my dad, who had fallen asleep on the den floor in front of the television, and threw open the door.

"Hi, Jim. Come on in," I said, out of breath. "I'm not ready."

"So I noticed," he said with a grin.

"I was cooking candles and lost track of time."

"You were what?"

"Oh, never mind. Just come on in and have a seat on the couch. I'll be ready in a minute."

I dashed to my room to change clothes, take out the curlers and run a brush through my hair, swipe mascara through my lashes, and place a hint of gloss on my lips. Jim sat uncomfortably on the sofa, listening to my dad snore and Jackie Gleason yell at Ralph Kramden.

After about 15 minutes Jim smelled something burning from the kitchen. He didn't want to call me for fear of waking up my dad. (Teenage boys don't like to wake up their date's dad if they can help it.) Instead, he tiptoed into the kitchen and discovered a pot on the stove with flames shooting up about 18 inches in the air.

Sleeping dad or no sleeping dad, Jim yelled, "Sharon! Whatever you were cooking is on fire!"

"Oh my goodness!" I exclaimed. "I forgot to turn off the stove!"

Just as I burst into the kitchen, Jim threw a cup of water into the flaming wax. Rather than extinguish the flames, the fire exploded upward. The flames shot up the wall, across the ceiling, and down the other side of the room. Our screams alerted my father, who woke to see his baby girl standing in a room surrounded by flames. With the agility of Superman, Dad sprang to his feet, ran to the kitchen faster than a speeding bullet, grabbed the lid of the pot, and clamped it down on the source of the flames. Just as quickly as the fire had erupted, it seemed to recede back into the pot like a genie returning to his bottle.

This all happened in a matter of seconds. We stood in the middle of the room like three stunned deer. I never did tell my dad that it was Jim who threw the water on the burning wax. Teenage boys have two strikes against them just by walking through the doors to pick up a man's baby girl.

After the shock of the incident wore off, I had time to reflect on the speed at which the flames blazed around the room, the feeling of fire licking against my skin, the terrifying sound the fire made. It made me think about my words and how easily they can explode and singe those around me. I saw and understood the destructive power of our words and the speed at which that destruction can spread. But you know what else I learned? I learned just how easy it is to stop the blaze...put a lid on it. As soon as my father placed a lid on the pot and removed the flames' source of oxygen, the fire went out.

And so it is with our words. God gave us two ears and one mouth. Therefore, we need to spend more time listening and less time talking. And when we get ready to speak those words that have the potential to start a fire...what do we need to do? Put a lid on it. That's right. Zip the lip.

Let's Pray

Dear Lord, set a guard over my mouth. Keep watch over the door of my lips. May nothing escape my mouth today that is not pleasing to You.

In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Now It's Your Turn

Read James 3:1-18 and note what the writer teaches us about the tongue.

What affect does a rudder have on a ship?

What affect does a bridle have on a horse?

What affect does a spark have on a forest?

What affect do your words have on those in your sphere of influence?

Here's an idea. Get a pot lid and place it on the kitchen counter as a reminder to "put a lid" on any destructive words that might try to slip past those pretty lips of your today.

Just for fun, send me a picture of you pot lid on the counter and I'll post it! Or if you're not tech savvy with posting pics, simply send me a note that you did it. Leave a comment on my blog page at www.sharonjaynes.com