Some things I learned on the farm

[pam]

Some Things I Learned on the Farm

Anonymous


Don't name a calf you plan to eat.

Country fences need to be horse high, pig tight and bull strong.

Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.

Keep skunks, lawyers, and bankers at a distance.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.

Mortgaging a future crop is like saddling a wobbly colt.

A bumble bee is faster than a John Deere tractor.

Trouble with a milk cow is she won't stay milked.

Don't skinny dip with snapping turtles.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.

Meanness don't happen overnight.

To know how country folks are doing look at their barns, not their houses.

Never lay an angry hand on a kid or an animal; it just ain't helpful.

Teachers, bankers and hoot owls sleep with one eye open.

Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.

Don't sell your mule, buy a plow.

Two can live as cheap as one if one don't eat.

Don't corner something meaner than you.

You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar, assuming, of course, that you want to catch flies.

Man is the only critter who feels the need to label things as flowers or weeds.

It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

Don't go hunting with a fellow named Chug-a-Lug.

You can't unsay a cruel thing.

Every path has some puddles.

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

[Diane Amberg]

So very true.

[Dee Gee]

Also, watch out for cow patties. 

[Ole Granny]

So very true, too!  (Where's the hold the nose guy?)

[Diane Amberg]

I also learned not to let my best girlfriend's older brother anywhere near me when there were fresh patties around. Once he picked me up and tossed me in one. Yuk!! He also stole my shoes, tied my hands together and hung me up on a support rafter in the barn and went off and left me. ( I got out of that one)

[flo]

  some very wise words of wisdom

[frawin]

I  had many dried Cow Pattie and Dried Horse Biscuit  battles when I was kid.
Frank

[Ole Granny]

Dried is the key word here!

[frawin]

Granny, you got that right. I milked cows in grade school and all the way thru High School, twice a day 365 days a year and I got pretty familiar with the not dried ones.
Frank

[pam]

Lol, didn't they have a cow-chip tossin contest for a few years at the Labor Day celebration in Severy?