Wal*Mart Super-Center Coming To Howard, KS?

[Warph]

                     

Senior executives at Wal*Mart said they were a little freaked out that the people of Howard, KS appear to have made no effort to stop them.  "No emotionally charged town hall meetings, no petitions to save local businesses, no calls to Elk Konnected or State Representatives, nothing.... absolutly nothing," chief operating officer Gisel Putz said as she reread the company statement explaining that the first phase of construction would entail demolishing several buildings of historical significance to the town.  "It's been so quiet, it's making me nervous. What if they're up to something?  Makes me wonder why Gen. Oliver O. Howard isn't turning over in his grave.  Even if they're not complaining, maybe this isn't a good location for us after all.  If there's no public outrage, something must be wrong."  At press time, wierded-out executives had stated that Wal*Mart still hasn't made up their mind about building there.

[Sons of Elk County]

Warph, you ol'  instigator. You know that Walmart ain't coming to Howard or Elk County. The fact that despite one million dollars from Homeland Security, $300,000 from Tarp, and the fact that Kansas gets 17% more Fed money than they pay in to the coffer, we still can't produce water that is not brown and smells like the sewer. That makes it hard for the Walmart to make those sno cones and sodas that are so popular at the Suprise, AZ store.

Sons of Elk County

[Diane Amberg]

Some of that extra Fed. money that Kansas gets comes from here in Delaware. We don't get all ours back. 

[srkruzich]

Some of that extra Fed. money that Kansas gets comes from here in Delaware. We don't get all ours back. 

I doubt that, kansas isn't a liberal state. Most of your tax dollars go to the blue states

[Diane Amberg]

I don't think that's how it is divided. 

[redcliffsw]

Some of that extra Fed. money that Kansas gets comes from here in Delaware. We don't get all ours back. 

It's always been my opinion that you support a "collective society" and Federal supremacy to trump liberty.

[Warph]

Seen on a bumper sticker in Lincoln, Nebraska:
Auntie Em... Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog.
Dorothy
                                                        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A retired community organizer from Chicago decided to write a book about churches around the country.  He started by flying to San Francisco and started working east to zigzag across the states from there. He went to a very large church and began taking pictures.

He spotted a golden telephone on a wall and was intrigued by a sign that read: "$10,000.00 a minute."  Seeking out the pastor he asked about the phone and the sign.  The pastor answered that this golden phone was, in fact, a direct line to Heaven and if he were to pay the price he could talk directly to God.  He thanked the pastor and continued on his way.

Visiting churches in Seattle, Boise, Denver, Minneapolis, Chicago, Milwaukee, New York, and other places, he found more phones with the same sign.  From each pastor he received the same answer.

Finally, he arrived in the great plains part of the U.S.  Upon entering a church, low and behold, he saw the usual golden telephone, but this time the sign read: "Calls: 35 cents."

Fascinated, he asked of the pastor, "Reverend, I have been in cities all across the country and in each church I have found this very same golden telephone, and I have been told it is a direct line to Heaven, and that I could talk to God.  However, in the other churches, the cost was $10,000.00 a minute.  Your sign reads 35 cents per call.  Why is that?"

The pastor, smiling benignly, replied: "Son, you're in Kansas now.  It's a local call."

[Wilma]

Love it!