(IN)Courage

[Judy Harder]

At once the Spirit sent him out into the wilderness,  and he was in the wilderness forty days, being tempted by Satan. He was with the wild animals, and angels attended him.

After John was put in prison, Jesus went into Galilee, proclaiming the good news of God.

"The time has come," he said. "The kingdom of God has come near. Repent and believe the good news!" ~Mark 1:12-15.

[Judy Harder]

I was sweeping the floor under the dining room table last night; Kyle was washing the dinner dishes. It was that sweet moment of the day: the kids are tucked in bed, but it's not so late yet that I can no longer keep my eyes open.

"I've been dealing with really frustrating, conflicting thoughts lately," I started. "I feel like in one day, I'll be swept over with this overwhelming desire to just plant some roots and dig ourselves deep in one location for a long time, and then five minutes later, I'll miss our overseas life, where we traveled all the time and never knew where home would be in a year's time."

"Wow, there's something really wrong with you," Kyle teased.

"I'm serious. Or like school. I'll be so excited about the fact that we can homeschool, loving every minute of it. And then an hour later, I'll be seriously questioning our sanity, and wondering why on earth we're making it hard on ourselves by doing it."

I'm actually this way with so many things. I'll love that our house is teeny-tiny, but then I'll think about how nice it would be to have just one extra bedroom. Or I'll relish in the bliss of living right at the base of mountains, and then not five minutes later, miss living near the beach.

I'll love that the two of us both work from home, but then I'll wonder if life would be less crazy if we had an office somewhere.

I'll be glad we live in a small town, but a second later, I'll wish we lived back in a big city.

Heck, I'll even order the salad, and then look at Kyle's burger and wonder why I didn't order that.

I am a mess.

"Do you ever feel this way?" I asked Kyle.

"Oh sure. I miss a lot of the places where we've traveled and lived."

"But more than just miss. Really wonder if where we are, doing what we're doing, is the best thing for our family. Do you ever feel like the 'best' thing is just around the corner?"

"I guess sometimes I wonder if the very opposite of what we're doing is what we're supposed to be doing."

I went back to sweeping. And then I had that head smack moment. It's the thing that cycles in my life routinely; the liturgical reminder from God. (You know how it is that God seems to do that? That there's a Big Theme in your life that God wants you to learn, over and over?)

"If I discover within myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." -C.S. Lewis



The reason I want to live somewhere different every five minutes is because there is nowhere, literally, on God's green earth that will make me happy. It's a lovely ball hurling through space, yes, but it's not Home. His fingerprints are smeared all over the place, from Mt. Everest to an infant's toes, but it's not where I'll ever feel.... right. At peace. Satisfied.

That doesn't mean I shouldn't listen to God's voice for where I need to be, what I need to be doing, when to move and when to stay still. But it does mean that although I want to be all over the place geographically, I must always find my roots buried in Him.

He is at work all over the world, and in many ways, He doesn't care where I live on it. But He cares about my heart. And He wants me to find peace where He is. Which is everywhere.

You'll see my night's reminder here—that the grass really is greener where I water it, because He is there, too. So I finish sweeping the floor, and a few hours later, pull the cord on the nightstand lamp, and tuck in to my earthly bed.

We may live in another country in a year, or we may still be here in Oregon. It doesn't really matter. One day, eventually, I'll finally be Home. And it'll scratch that itch of satisfaction and peace.

With what does your heart wrestle?



When I asked Jesus into my life at the age of fifteen, I was under the impression that he would do an overhaul of my entire life.  Well, he did, just not in the ways I would have thought.  I thought, and hoped, that everything would be better, easier, prettier, softer, that I would instantly feel whole for the first time.

The overhaul came alright, but it came in the form of friction between me and each parent; friends that I had been hanging out with didn't understand and I found myself, again, a girl without a confidante; sadly, my emotions remained the hormonal-induced tidal waves that they were pre-salvation and my laziness remained at the typical teenage levels.

But the worst change that I can see looking back was my goody-two-shoes image being magnified through the lens of feeling as if I had just become the poster girl at my high school for Christianity.  For Jesus-loving, basically.

I thought I had been keeping my act together as the good girl all those years, but it was nothing compared to the weight I felt once I began to follow Jesus.  Grace was not in my vocabulary.  If I were a good girl before Jesus, I had to be best girl after Jesus. And if I weren't, people would get the wrong idea about the Savior.  All because of me.  And I couldn't let that happen.  Too many people that I cared about didn't know Christ yet and were watching my fledgling faith to see if it were a phase I'd simply grow out of eventually or something that could actually change who I was.

Twenty-five years have gone by since I first spoke with Jesus in an intimate way.  I have gone on to do more sinning post-Jesus then pre-Jesus.  But my yearning for the appearance of perfection became stronger as I got older, especially as my circles of influence widened and shifted as an author, speaker and church staff member.  I had to look more like my perceived version of Jesus,  and nothing would slip through the cracks of that because then what would people think?

It turns out that one can only live like that for so long before things start leaking and coming out sideways.  The past few years for me have been a study and experiment in allowing myself to be myself.  In sharing with others humungous ways I've messed up and still do. In telling my stories, no matter how pathetic and harsh and how downright unattractive I look in their light.

My latest story is one of divorce.  An ending of a Christian marriage.  It doesn't get more ugly than that.  And there is no covering up.  You can cover up a difficult marriage for a very long time; trust me, I know.  But you cannot pretend that you're not getting divorced.  (I didn't even bother trying.)

By the time the end of my marriage came along, I had been tested and tried through the fires of being authentic, letting people know of my constant sinning, and falling back onto grace.  I now believe that it's okay to not be okay.  And that no one's opinion of me matters except One.

I am a just a girl, perfectly imperfect, trying to love Jesus, and holding on to the one thing that alluded me for so very long.  The truth that it doesn't matter what I do or what I say or what happens to me, grace is there to catch me and remind me that I am loved.  Deeply and perfectly and forever.  And that is what is changing me.

By: Elisabeth Corcoran

[Judy Harder]

So many times I run from you. So many times I hide from your perfect will in my life.

So many times you bring me back.

Ive been sitting here this morning having my quiet time, drinking my coffee. I love mornings like this, where I can sit and soak up my time with the Lord. Lately I have been questioning a lot about my ability (or inability) to fully trust Him. To have complete relinquishment of myself.

My head gets in the way of my heart.

I want my life to not only serve Him, but I want it to be a fragrant offering to Him. There is so much I can't do on my own. So much I cant overcome on my own. Yet He still stands there waiting for me to ask Him for his hand. Its so very hard sometimes to honestly believe that someone else knows what is right for me. It is hard for me to just sit and wait for His will, yet when I do, life holds so much more peace and joy.

Worship is my heart.  I want really to worship Him.  I want my life to be a pleasing fragrance. I want my worship to be so enveloped in awe and adoration that those around me gain a true understanding of the personal and emotional relationship they can have with a loving God. I bow my pride before Him and pour my veil of worship out. Even in the midst of my ugliness and my vileness, He still longs for that personal relationship with me.

It is what I was created for.

Pouring out my heart. Why is that so hard? Why is it so hard for me to show Him the areas of my life that he already knows exist? Why do I think that I can hide things from an all compassing, all knowing jealous God?

I confess now my selfishness, my pride, my longing for the things of this world. I humbly lay down my life in front of him- like I have done so many times before. I give him my life.

Actually, I give him back the life he gave me.

Have you ever wondered what it feels like to have absolute abandon? Have you ever been in a place in your relationship with Christ where you feel so completely out of control of everything, yet so at peace? I long for that, I long for the relationship with Him that causes me to completely release my grip on my life. I long for the realness of just crawling in His lap and laying my head on His shoulder like a child does.

Complete and utter trust.

Christ is not a lofty God sitting way up there, looking at us way down here. He isn't waiting for us to sing a hymn and light a candle. He doesn't care about our rituals, He isn't impressed with them.

He created us for the relationship. He created us for His joy. He created us to worship Him.

He created us to be REAL.

Sunday mornings are meaningless to Him if they are lathered up in shiny offerings of pride. He wants us to cry with Him. He wants us to share our darkest and most hurtful moments with Him. He wants us to understand that our relationship with him was meant to be intimate, emotional, honest.

He longs for those moments with us.

By: Heather,  Especially Heather

[Judy Harder]

We love you.

We love that you read here every day.

But it's leap year – let's take a leap together and today take the time you would have spent reading (in)courage and read your Bible or favorite Bible study instead.

Unplugging together ~ much love,

the (in)courage team.

[Judy Harder]

Never, Ever Quit
Holley Gerth


"Let's go!" my spandex-clad husband cheerfully declares as we round a corner on our bikes. I've been enthusiastically pedaling along with him but suddenly my eyes see it...THE HILL.

"Did we make a wrong turn?" I ask with hope in my voice. His sprint to the start of the incline serves as my answer.

I start strong.

By halfway up I think I might die.

By two thirds up I'm hoping I will.

I wave farewell to the caterpillar racing past my tire.

The scenes of my life flash before my eyes and I notice a lot of them contain chocolate.

Then suddenly...I'm there.

At the top.



I would whoop and holler with joy except I can't breathe. But I do manage a lopsided grin. And my husband says, "Aren't you glad you didn't quit?" Despite a strong desire to smack him on his spandex-covered tush for putting me through this, I have to admit he's right. Stinking hill. It was worth it after all.

You will want to quit. More than once.

And fear is always at the root of it.

I'm not going to make it.

I can't do this.

It's too much.

But listen here–you can do it. You're stronger than you know. Your God is bigger than you've seen. That hill isn't as unending as it seems right now.

Just keep going and going and going.

Until you leave fear in the dust.

Here's the secret: You're not a quitter...you're a climber. You just may not know it yet.

–Holley Gerth, author of You're Already Amazing {The ebook officially releases today! Woo-hoo!}


* This post is part of a series called 7 Secrets to Overcoming Fear (read the rest here)

[Judy Harder]

What's holding you back from decluttering?

Mar 02, 2012  Tsh Oxenreider


When I was 15, my room looked like a shrine to ballet. I had been dancing for 12 years at the time, I was considering going pro, and had even stood in front of the Bolshoi Ballet theater in Moscow that spring.

My room had ballet posters, signed toe shoes from famous dancers thumb-tacked to the walls, and falling-down stacks of Dance! magazine. I even had a six-foot portable ballet barre, handmade just for me. (Bet you're surprised. Because, you know, I have all kinds of time to pirouette around the house with my littles right now.)

But as you might guess—I have absolutely no idea where any of that stuff is now. 19 years later, and I've moved on. God led me in absolutely the right direction (which, for me, was away from ballet), and I don't regret it for one day. You couldn't guess I was headed towards professional ballet if you looked around my house. I hope there's some other ballerina-in-training enjoying that wooden ballet barre right now.

Now, I'm not saying those years don't mean anything to me. I have nothing but fond memories of rehearsals, annual Nutcracker productions, tutus, and even the bleeding toes. I'm so glad I spent much of my childhood in ballet class.

But can you imagine what my house would be like if I kept all my ballet stuff that I haven't used in almost two decades? We wouldn't have any room to make new memories.

I bet you could say something similar. Soccer trophies, prom dresses, homecoming mums, old history papers... We've all collected stuff like this. And except for a few precious items, most of it doesn't reflect who we are now. It'd be silly and unreasonable to keep all of it.

Stuff doesn't usually hold our memories... Stuff is often just stuff. And it can be hard to let go of stuff. We believe it holds a lot of power, and it can be scary to let it go.

• We think if we get rid of something, we're saying the memory behind it doesn't matter.

• We believe that we'd upset the person who once gave it to us, even though we never use it.

• We think we may one day need it, even though we haven't for five years and it takes up space.

Holding on to too much stuff can hold us back. It can keep us from making plans for the future, and it can overwhelm us in the present. It can make our days more congested than they need to be.

In short... stuff can rob us of peace.
And I've found that when my physical world feels crazy and cluttered, my internal world does, too. I'm less motivated to rise out of bed with a good attitude. I'm more reticent to to face the day with gladness, to be patient with my family, to be thankful for the my blessings.

It even affects my heath—I'm not as likely to exercise, to eat well, or to go to bed and sleep soundly. When I don't have the room to work out, or I can't find my ingredients in the pantry... It adds mental clutter to my day, and I give up before I start. And when I go to bed among stuff without a permanent spot, I truly don't sleep as well.

Having a reasonably decluttered home is so much more than just an act of gathering things for your local thrift store. It's a deliberate choice to add some peace and order to your life. You're trading in things for blank space; the inability to find things for a purposeful spot for the things that matter most.

Getting rid of things is a gift. I don't regret not having my ballet paraphernalia one bit... I still cherish the memories of those days, and I don't have to deal with dusting stuff I once loved. I can thank God for those days, and still have the freedom to hope for the future in front of me.

Join me?
If you feel the need to declutter, we're starting our annual spring cleaning series this next Monday, March 5. It's called Project: Simplify, and for four weeks, we'll declutter four hotspots in our homes. You can read more about it here. All are welcome!

Consider your decluttering an act of worship. You're freeing your family to wait expectantly for what God has in store for the future, you're thanking Him for the possessions you truly love, and you're unhinging your spirit from things on earth that will one day be dust. Our stuff is a gift... And yet, it's just stuff.

Have you found that decluttering your physical space also frees you mentally and spiritually?

From Tsh of Simple Mom, who's really going to roll up her sleeves this month...



Epic Fail
Mar 02, 2012  Karen Cone


I hear that recording again. It's the one in my head that says, "You are not doing a good job at ______", or "You've really got to start doing_____", or "When are you going to get a grip on _____". And when the message is finished, someone hits the repeat button as if I want to hear that again!

All of these messages carrying the same meaning: Epic Fail (in the language of my teenage daughter). I am falling short. I can't measure up. I've gotta get serious about whatever. It is enough to drive this mommy insane.

And drive me insane it does. I find myself feeling anxious, angry, rushed, pushed, crabby, short-tempered, on edge. Then I try a little harder. I make a new plan. I come up with some ways to conquer the world–at least, just my little world. And guess what? IT DOESN"T WORK! I am only repeating the cycle on a different level.

On these days even my prayers burden me down. "Lord, I'm sorry, I failed at that again," "Lord, I'm sorry

I'm not doing a very good job at this parenting thing." "Father, will you help me to be a better mom, a more patient wife, a more gentle person, a kinder neighbor, etc.?" No surprise that a prayer life would dry up under those conditions.

Finally, I just say to God, "Father, I want to live for you. But I am struggling in every area. I am struggling just to talk to you. If I could just see Your face, if I could just look into Your eyes and see Your grace there. I need You."

And then I hear Him so clearly, not audibly, but clearly just the same: "Karen," He says as He looks into my eyes, "I want you to know that I have never been disappointed in you." Tears well in my eyes as His grace pours over me.

"Never?", I ask.

"Never." He says. And the burden falls away.

I don't have to try harder, do better, be more. I only have to come to Him. He will give me rest. His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

At Rest,

Karen

www.souljourney318.com

[Judy Harder]

God is in no hurry. Compared to the works of mankind, He is extremely deliberate. God is not a slave to the human clock.

Charles Swindoll

You tell me  your desert stretches for miles, and how you lived in it for weeks, months, or years. And I know exactly what you're talking about because I've seen the same friend-making landscape. True, sometimes friendships form quickly, but usually I've had to wait on them.

And really, how many of us like to wait on anything? I want what I want and I want it now, thankyouverymuch.

I can do all the right things in hopes of finding heart-friends, show up, open up and lift up. Still, sometimes it doesn't happen. Heaven knows God wants my heart connected to others, but when those connections remain elusive, what's a girl to do?

Your comments to When You Want Friends But Have a Hard Time Finding Them told me just how many of us have experienced this season. Your insightful words encouraged me, and they made me exhale in relief that it ain't just me. Like so many, Aundrea describes her own season with few friends, and her comment reads like fresh air:

I've spent a good amount of time asking God why this is happening, and what I can do about it. I haven't received a direct answer yet, but He has put some things into my mind:

1. During this time of few friends, I have spent a LOT more time with my husband and kids. Our relationships have all grown exponentially and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

2. I've had more time for God. It's often during times of need that we turn to Him. My relationship with Him has deepened, and I've found myself relying on HIM to minister to my needs rather than running around from person to person, ignoring His wisdom.

3. I've had a lot of time to reflect on myself and do some much-needed soul searching and work on issues I'd been ignoring for most of my adult life in the hopes they'd somehow disappear.

4. I'm learning how to choose friends more wisely. I was so desperate at first that I RAN to every Christian group I could find and desperately tried to begin an intimate friendship with the first woman who had kids the same ages as mine. That was not wise. I made mistakes and have learned some valuable lessons. Intimate friendships take time to grow.

God is now starting to slowly bring women into my life that I probably wouldn't have chosen myself. They're older or younger, they may or may not have kids my age or share my interests in homeschooling or music. But I'm learning to pay better attention and value people for more than similarity. While I still don't have a BFF here in this area, I'm finally okay with it. I really am. I've learned to lean more on Christ and my husband, and I'm pretty sure that is the result of the lesson I'm supposed to learn at this time.

Aundrea has been a real-life friend for 20 years. I tell you this because I know this girl is as likeable as can be; she could make friends with anybody. I've witnessed her in a variety of social situations, and she maneuvers them brilliantly. If she struggles to find friendships in this season, it's not because she's doing anything "wrong."

It's because God wants her focus elsewhere.

Friendship connections become cluttery distractions if they overshadow priorities needing attention. It's a lesson I learned kicking and screaming, but one I learned just the same.

God is the God of perfect time, and He arranges and spends it purposefully. If I've done all I can do to seek something and I still don't have it, there's a good reason. Maybe several. May I spend that time purposefully discovering what He wants me to learn in the waiting.

What have you learned while waiting on friends? On something else important in your life? What do you find to be the most difficult part of waiting?

Kristen Strong, Chasing Blue Skies

[Judy Harder]

A Sunday Scripture: Road to Easter

incourage




Moses assembled all the elders of Israel. He said, "Select a lamb for your families and slaughter the Passover lamb. Take a bunch of hyssop and dip it in the bowl of blood and smear it on the lintel and on the two doorposts. No one is to leave the house until morning. God will pass through to strike Egypt down. When he sees the blood on the lintel and the two doorposts, God will pass over the doorway; he won't let the destroyer enter your house to strike you down with ruin.

"Keep this word. It's the law for you and your children, forever. When you enter the land which God will give you as he promised, keep doing this. And when your children say to you, 'Why are we doing this?' tell them: 'It's the Passover-sacrifice to God who passed over the homes of the Israelites in Egypt when he hit Egypt with death but rescued us.'"

The people bowed and worshiped.

The Israelites then went and did what God had commanded Moses and Aaron. They did it all.

Exodus 12:21-30 {The Message Translation}.

[Judy Harder]

From Disappointment To Divine Appointment
Mar 05, 2012 Sarah Stirman




I'm a word nerd. Claimin' it.

I love new words, old words, fun words, big words. I love to make up words, too.

At my house, it seems that if you add the -age ending to a word, it makes it a little more genteel in nature, perhaps more polite in conversation.

"My chestage is so sore from that workout yesterday!" See? You can totally bring that up at your husband's fancy office dinner. Or not.

The point remains: I love words.

So it was that my thoughts drifted while taking notes in Bible study. I was initially trying to decipher how to spell the word "disappointment" while the instructor was illustrating that disappointment may lead us to God's biggest work in our lives yet.

Dis – of course that prefix means not, opposite of, away from.
Appointment — hmmm.. a role, task, assignment.

Whether or not we can spell it, the weight of the word itself brings about heaviness of heart and soul, filling the eyes with tears. We all know that disappointment feels far more heavy than a clinical discussion of the word.

You know disappointment first-hand, no doubt. The job, the child, the house, the husband, the life you were counting on in some regard didn't happen. And your heart was broken.

The last year has been a series of disappointments for our family. A job loss for my husband was unexpected. A new job then required a move for our family, which our teens let us know wasn't in their life plan. Now the new location and cost of living has me sending out resume's and applying for jobs only to hear again and again, "No thank you, you aren't quite right.." or to be told nothing at all.

Faith is leaning into the word itself and hearing Him whisper: "See? Child, I'm telling you. This isn't your appointment. This isn't what I have for you. I have so much more for you. Dry your eyes. Dust yourself off. Move on."

Is it possible that God can use my disappointment to move me to a Divine Appointment in my life?

Consider some heroes in the faith from scripture:

– Hannah, disappointed every month when she still was unable to have a child. Finally, finally... God blessed her with Samuel. Samuel that she gave back to God and who spoke for him.

– Ruth, widowed and alone, found her kinsmen-redeemer, and ended up giving birth to Obed. She has a spot in the lineage of Christ now.

– Sarah, my own namesake. Her disappointment at watching the calendar flip year after year with no children led her to desperation. She eventually would be redeemed, known as "Mother of many."

The sting of my job rejection disappointments may subside as I journey deeper in with the Lord seeking my divine appointment. I'm trusting I'll know it when I see it.

The boxes are mostly unpacked in our new home as the kids are making friends at school, and we are blessed to be employed again. (What is the grace period for living with boxes in your house after you've moved? I'm pretty sure I'm pushing it...)

The hurt of the disappointments is healing while I seek time with the Lord. My faith can be a shaky seedling some days, but I am hopeful that I will grow into His divine appointment for me.

by Sarah Stirman, The Cleft of the Rock



You're Already Amazing – Details
Mar 05, 2012 12:31 am | Jessica Turner


We are so excited to begin reading our own Holley Gerth's You're Already Amazing as a community.

We hope this post will answer some logistical questions for you! If you have additional questions, please feel free to leave them in the comments section below and someone will be sure to respond.



What to Expect
If this is your first time reading a Bloom book – welcome! We are so glad you are here. Essentially, each week you can expect to see videos of us discussing each chapter of You're Already Amazing.

All posts will be on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, not weekends. The content will always be available here on the Bloom page, so feel free to watch the videos at any time if the days are not convenient for you.

We are so excited that Holley will be joining us to discuss every chapter! Mondays and Wednesdays will be chapter posts and on Fridays we will have a special freebie from Holley to go along with the book. Be prepared to be blessed. Holley really knocked our socks off.

We will also have posts in the (in)courage BlogFrog community to discuss the videos and chapters in more detail. (So be sure and sign up if you haven't yet – it's easy peasy. Just click here.)

Buy a Book, Give a Book – and Get Free Shipping!
You're Already Amazing is currently on sale for $9 on DaySpring.com.


When Angie and I first started Bloom almost two years ago, it was very important that everyone be able to participate, regardless of ability to purchase a book.

If you find yourself in a very difficult financial season and are unable to purchase a book, from Wednesday through Friday this week  you can fill out a form requesting a free book. (The form will be posted on this page on Wednesday.) We ask that you please be very honest and only request a book if you truly cannot afford the $10. We only have a limited quantity to give away that largely depends on how many sponsors/donations we get.

This is where the community of Bloom beautifully shows up.

If you are able to purchase a book for someone in need, DaySpring has set up a sweet deal for you starting today.

In addition to purchasing your own book, you can choose to purchase a second book for someone in need for an additional $9. (Feel free to give more than one if you can! To purchase a "Sponsor" book,just go here, click on the image of You're Already Amazing with the green sponsor button on it and purchase the Sponsor book for $9. This option expires March 30)

If you purchase two or more books you get FREE shipping on your book – and DaySpring will take care of getting your donated book to a fellow Bloomie in need. Just use coupon code: BLOOMBOOK (If any other wonderful DaySpring products fall into your shopping cart, those will ship free too! This code will also work if you are purchasing multiple books for yourself).

We are so excited and thankful that DaySpring is again managing all the coordination of the donated books – and taking care of the shipping. What a blessing! Also a special thanks to publisher Revell, who has graciously donated 100 copies of the book to help with this effort.

With each Bloom book selection, we are always amazed by the community of women who step forward and buy books for their fellow sisters in Christ. THANK YOU to those of you who are able to generously give.

If you have additional questions about the sponsor program please visit the FAQ page.

The Schedule
If you're a list-lover like me, here's what to expect:

Wednesday, March 7: Free book post
Friday, March 9: Free book closes

Monday, March 12: Giveaway related to the book
Wednesday, March 14: Sponsor reminder
Friday, March 16: Giveaway ends/logistics re: free books

Monday, March 19: Video introducing Holley
Wednesday, March 21: Post from Holley
Friday, March 23: Reminder for study kick-off

Monday, March 26: Chapters 1 & 2
Wednesday, March 28: Chapter 3
Friday, March 30: You're Already Amazing Freebie

Monday, April 2: Chapter 4
Wednesday, April 4: Chapter 5 & 6
Friday, April 6: You're Already Amazing Freebie

Monday, April 9: Chapter 7
Wednesday, April 11: Chapter 8
Friday, April 13: You're Already Amazing Freebie

Monday, April 16: Chapter 9 & 10
Wednesday, April 18: Chapter 11
Friday, April 20: You're Already Amazing Freebie

Monday, April 23: Bonus video from Angie and Jess
Wednesday, April 25: Wrap-up from Holley
Friday, April 27: You're Already Amazing Freebie

WHEW! That was a lot of info. Thanks for sticking with us.

Love,

Angie and Jessica

[Judy Harder]

When Being Authentic Means Shutting Your Mouth
Mar 06, 2012  Emily Freeman


They called me shy. It didn't seem like a compliment. From kindergarten all the way through fourth grade, I was the quiet girl with the skinny arms. And when I did speak, it was always met with Louder. We can't hear you. The fact that my ears stuck out just made things worse for me – it fit the mouse-like stereotype a little too well.

I was a shy girl with the shy best friend. I would have stayed that way if the world hadn't ended in the fourth grade when my parents told me we were moving to Iowa. Make new friends? Are you kidding me? That means I'd have to like, talk. Still, we moved and I left my shy best friend behind.

Several years and several moves later, I had learned the fine art of becoming who everyone wanted me to be in order to be accepted. Not in the I'll-jump-off-a-bridge-too kind of way, more in a I-don't-rock-the-boat kind of a way. I watched people, learned what got on their nerves, learned what people liked and didn't like. I wasn't doing this on purpose. I just really wanted to have a lot of friends. I wanted to be seen as fun. I didn't want to miss out on anything. Shy didn't seem okay.

I often say I'm an introvert in extroverted skin. On the tests, I come out close to the middle, falling slightly on the introverted side. As someone who prefers to listen long, I've struggled through this concept of being authentic and open. I wrote about it here last month. Since then, I've thought a lot about those of us who are introverted and how it relates to authenticity, honesty, telling your story, sharing your art, living in community.

When we consider the spiritual transformation of our lives, it often means being stretched beyond what comes natural and leaning hard into what is supernatural, those things that come from God. At the same time, I can't help but wonder if learning to be open for an introvert looks different than it does for extroverts. Perhaps applying one kind of definition to authenticity is hurtful to some. Perhaps for those of us who are naturally introverted, being quiet is being authentic.

We've talked a lot about community here at (in)courage. But community might look very different depending on your personality. What does being authentic in community look like for you?

I just got Introverts in the Church by Adam S. McHugh and plan to read Quiet by Susan Cain next. Do any of you introverts have any other recommendations?