(IN)Courage

[Judy Harder]

Where Life and Death Meet
Aug 28, 2012 01:20 am | Jamie S. Harper



Source: extraecclesiam.wordpress.com via olives! on Pinterest


My grandpa died today. I think of him, of life and death, of those who have gone before. My dad. My granny (grandpa's wife). My great grandparents. Jesus on the cross.

I think of how I want to paint a beautiful picture, but I feel small and unable.  I wonder if my timid words can paint graceful pictures in which you read and think of how lovely the words come together.

Paradoxical is the place where life and death meet.

We grieve. We laugh. We hug and hold hands. We ache. We live in the midst of pain.

It is not only this way when death comes. It is every day – the push and pull of beauty and ashes, gladness and mourning, praise and despair.

I dip my finger into the ashes and make colors there, grays, blues, greens, yellows, oranges, reds, and more. I spread them onto the canvas and art is created from mourning and despair.

I weep because the picture is unfinished yet, but I see that where pain turns to praise, beauty unfolds naturally.

I've seen it, experienced it, my life of despair in a pit, hopeless and alone, now healed, whole, and set free to run wild and unrestrained.

I image that's what Heaven is like only better. No more aging body full of decay to slow us down. No weeping or despair. No lonely days. All hope is there, but still offered here.

So for you who are still in chains living heavy and oppressed, This Crazy God of Grace wants you to know – He heals broken hearts, He sets captives free, He gives light to the darkness, He comforts all who mourn.

Where we've been broken, devastated, and ruined, He rebuilds and restores. I know you may not think it possible, but I've lived enough to know it is true. He loves me and you deep, high, wide, and long, through and through.

He removes the sackcloth of mourning and clothes me with Jesus. This sweet life giving Jesus lets my roots run deep and wide, my branches reach out looking for His light, giving shade to the weary. I am an oak of righteousness to display His splendor. I bend and sway when grief and storms come. Though painful, the branches that fall purify me.

You can be planted in this grace too. May your pain find His everlasting joy here today!

{inspired by Isaiah 61}

By Jamie S. Harper, Brown Paper and Strings



Unglued Mama Mornings
Aug 28, 2012 01:20 am | Lysa






As we enter the new school year I'm making a bold commitment: No more unglued mama mornings. I want our mornings to go better this year with less frustration, yelling, and chaos.

I started thinking about this last spring when we had a string of really hard mornings.

One day, as I pulled up to the school, the atmosphere inside the car was thick with tension. Not wanting the last words spoken to my daughter to be harsh, I tried to change the course of our conversation before she headed into her day. "Listen, I love you. I'm sorry we had a rough morning."

"We always have rough mornings," she shot back before slamming the car door.

Nothing quite makes a mom feel more successful than a little dialogue like that.

As I rubbed the stabbing feeling in my chest, I thought, "Something has got to change. Each day I promise myself I won't yell at the kids. But each morning something triggers me and I just lose it."

Ever been there?

It's not like we wake up in the mood to get frustrated with our people, right? I mean honestly, I usually wake up in a pretty good mood. But then the stress of getting everyone ready and to school on time makes the crazy creep in.

This one can't find her shoes. That one needs a report printed and we have no ink. The bread for sandwiches is still at the grocery store because I forgot to buy it yesterday. And to top it all off, I have no cash to give the kids so they can buy lunch at school.

The whining. The complaining. The feeling that I can't ever get it all together. It all escalates and sends me over the edge.

Well, I want this school year to be different. I want to be like our key verse today describes: "made new in the attitude of my mind." (Ephesians 4:22-24) The Greek word for "made new" is kaino. One of its definitions is uncommon. I want to be an uncommon calm in the midst of chaos and an example of peace for my kids in a world of pressure. For that to happen, I came up with a plan:

Tell the world to wait.
When I wake up, my mind is like a dry sponge. What I soak up first will saturate me most deeply. If I don't want to be consumed with the stresses of my day, I must soak up what will renew my mind instead — God's Word. Even if it's only for 5 minutes, I've got to put the world on hold until I've checked in with God.

Remember I'm managing blessings.
If I want my attitude to be made new, I must keep things in perspective. While my frustrations seem big, things like lost shoes and less than perfect lunches aren't big problems. They are small aggravations that come with managing blessings.

Let my kids own their 'irresponsibilities.'
My kid's irresponsibility will not become my emergency. I need to communicate my expectations so they know they're going to have to own the consequences of their choices. For example, if they wait until the last minute to print their report and the printer has no ink, they'll have to print it at school or turn it in late. Either way, I can't own this situation and let it throw me into frantic, fix-it mode. I can let the consequences of my kid's choices scream, so I don't have to.

All of this is going to take some intentionality and I seriously doubt I'll do it perfectly. But I'm excited about trying. I'm excited to "put on my new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Which is a fancy way of saying I'm excited to have less unglued mama mornings and a lot more peace this school year.

By Lysa TerKeurst

[Judy Harder]

Love Them Well
Aug 29, 2012 01:20 am | Jennifer Schmidt




"We're praying for this next chapter," I heard the greeter mention to someone as they walked out of the sanctuary. I glanced up to see who she was addressing, and my sweet friends came into view.

"Chapter, what chapter," I inquired? Anticipating the announcement of an engagement or a trip, or some other fun endeavor, I smiled, and snagged a big hug.

She paused, grabbed my hand, and whispered, "Paul. Cancer. It's everywhere. It's in the bones, liver and gallbladder. There is no cure."

My hug deepened and slowly, raw emotions started pouring out in the form of that huge, soul wrenching, ugly cry. For me, it's an act so foreign, I wasn't sure where to go with my response.

Ever so quietly, I heard her state, "I want you to sing."  My sobs intensified.

Today, as I type, tears fall to the keyboard just thinking of those private moments this past Sunday.

I gazed into her eyes. Eyes of a true servant. Eyes that mimic Oswald Chamber's words, "We have to pray with our eyes on God, not on the difficulties."

That is their life testimony. A couple whose eyes continuously gaze on our Savior. Words escaped me, and all I could get out was, "You two are the hands and feet of Jesus."

She comforted me with the assurance , "It's Ok to be sad, we've been sad."  Then she added, "But pray that. Pray others will see His faithfulness. Of course, I pray that we would be healed from this disease, and that ultimately His plan is complete healing on earth, but if it's not, we want people to see Jesus through this."

We continued to share. I continued to cry, and as we closed, I declared, "I don't know what to do. What can I do?"

Ever so simply, she commanded, "Love him well. Grab your husband, and do something fun. This month, I want you to say, 'We are going to go have some fun together in Liz and Paul's honor.'"

Love him well.

Applicable to my own life, I've extrapolated that to,  Love them well.

Can it really be that easy?

Daily reverberating through my mind, those three little words, Love them well, have made their mark.

You see, I'm a live Life with no regrets kind of gal. I'd like to even think I'm quite intentional with my choices. Next month, I host the Becoming Conference-  a  weekend designed to bring encouragement and tangible ideas for becoming more frugal, creative and purposeful in our every day lives. It's going to be a weekend of refreshment for all walks of life.

Yet while I have pages of ideas to share, filled with creative and meaningful ways to be more intentional with our time, resources, and families, none of those hold any meaning unless I Love them Well, unless the best intentions take flight.

This past week, those words really hit me hard,  because while I have loved my family deeply, I have not loved them well.

My blog is filled with the theme: Embrace the little things, they are most often the big things, and yet all month I've been too busy to savor those little things. I've been too busy to seek meaning and magic in the mundane.

Yet, that excuse is a lie. I find the time for those things that I really want to do.

Busyness is a choice. Busyness robs me of community, and it's my excuse for the ultimate reality which comes from not guarding my moments well.

Loving well looks different for each family. For me, I needed to nurture the small sacred moments that I've been missing. I needed to be present and available, not just living among them.

So yesterday, when our youngest daughter wanted to play salon, which always lasts at least an hour, I changed my "No," to "Yes," and reminded myself that I will never get these moments back.

When our eighteen year old walked in the door at 11:00 pm wondering what was for dinner, I remembered the whisper, "Love them well." While it would be a completely acceptable reminder that the kitchen closed hours ago, I made him some dinner and listened to stories about his day. Even though exhausted after a long day of work, I just wanted to be with him; to share Life with him.

When my eldest daughter wanted to watch TV, freeing up some computer time for me, I insisted, "Let's go outside for a walk and enjoy time together. It's such a beautiful day."

These moments, once spent, can not be reclaimed. Guard them wisely.

Love them well. Love them deliberately.

Three simple words which yield a radical response.

Love them well.

It doesn't have to be complicated.

Love them well.

It just has to be done. It's a choice.

Simple. Deliberate. Intentional.

Love then well.

And now,  in honor of my special friends,  I'm off to plan a hot date for my honey and me. It's been too long. I need to Love him well.

How are you doing with loving your family well?
Has busyness robbed you of any sacred moments lately, or maybe you have some encouragement for those trying to be more intentional with their time?

I'd love for you to share  in the comments.

(Shared by Jen Schmidt, author of Balancing Beauty and Bedlam)

[Judy Harder]

When Your Journey Leads You Downhill, God Will Make a Way

Aug 30, 2012 01:20 am | Bonnie Gray

When your faith journey leads you downhill — with fears and anxiety overwhelming you — how can God make a way?

I inched along my familiar walking path.  Uphill.

My legs plod ahead on auto-pilot, just like the countless times they've done along this dirt trail.

The wind is blowing gently, the air still crisp because the sun is still rubbing sleep from its eyes.

I can't seem to feel comfort from any of it.

I'm waiting for peace to seep into me, like it always has whenever I escape into the quiet.  But early this morning, it felt like I was walking knee-deep in snow. My feet felt heavy like lead, even though I was simply stepping through summer air.

There was no snow-covered mountain for me to scale.

But, deep in my heart, there's been an avalanche.

A crushing weight of pressure to perform. To shake whatever's bothering me. To move ahead and just get back to being me: the one who can take action. The one who knows how to make decisions — to set a goal and climb mountains until I've reached the top of Mount Everest.

But, I can't shake it.

This avalanche of worry.

Avalanche
This avalanche of
– doubts,
– questions,
and imperfect choices.

It's not the first time I've faced uncertainty. That isn't what fazed me.

No, what I fear wasn't the unknown.

What I feared was the certainty of what's ahead.

The journey God's placed me on isn't going to be easy.

I wanted to find another way out, but anxiety wasn't going away.

I stopped mid-way on the side of the mountain, overwhelmed by how alone I felt in that moment.

Why wasn't God helping me find a way out?

I had been praying night and day, meditating on Scripture by the bulk, confiding in godly counsel, and seeking Him in all the ways I knew to do.

Time was running out.  Days grew into weeks. Weeks into months.

Where are you, God?

The View
I don't know how long I stood there crying into the wind, as the rolling landscape I have always sought refuge blurred into a wet, blurry kleenex-emergency mess.

I didn't want to hike any longer.  I turned to head back to the car.  The morning was rising and I didn't want any passer-byers to catch sight of my puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

As I made my way down the mountain, something caught my eye.

Far to the right of my shoulder, I see...

Orange.

Flecks of orange scattered out between the expanse of brittle, yellowed dried-out shrubs of summer.

My steps carry me quicker downhill.

I want to get closer.  This color — so brilliant.  So vibrant.

I don't remember seeing any of this on my way up.  I whisper.  What is it?

Poppies.

Golden, tangerine, California poppies dotting the hills.

And I wonder.  Was I so lost in my avalanche of worries that I missed all this going uphill?

I must have been looking so intensely on my path winding up, that I didn't see the view on either side.

Sometimes determination — having been useful in one season of life — can hold us captive to keep barreling forward, instead of hearing God whisper, "Let go. Change course."

Sometimes the time for determination expires — and walking by faith by letting go begins.

Determination can leave us blind — or we can use it to walk downhill.

To still waters.

Downhill
I didn't see any of these quiet petals blooming among weeds, reaching out softly among the cindery, worn out soil.

And just like the delicate petals of poppies I stooped down to trace gently with my fingers — I felt God speak straight into where my heart could still hear Him:

The view downhill, Bonnie.

There's beauty here.  Just for you.  Downhill.

Downhill?  I don't want to go downhill. I've always traveled uphill.

But, here Jesus was leading me.

God was making a way for me.

It's downhill.

Was I willing to travel this way with Jesus?  Will I trust him in the descent — as passionately as I trusted Him in the ascent?

I don't know... I choked, my heart breaking in surrender.

If you promise there will be poppies.  If you promise there will be beauty — among the weeds and the barrenness — if you promise me you'll still plant golden petals of Jesus, I will go downhill... with you.

Soil
As I made my way down the mountain, I took the fork in the road that led to a creek downwind — that carried me to a meadow — where a big oak tree sprawls it's long arms across the sky, like lightning across a desert sky.

There, at the bottom of my hike, I closed my eyes and stood silently to pray.

Give me courage to walk downhill, Jesus.

As I whispered out to Him again, I notice the ground I'm standing on is wet from the morning dew.

Soil. Wet. Rich.

Soil.

You are good soil, Bonnie.

And God's words thundered on my soul like wet rain on a sweltering summer day —

"I don't think the way you think.
The way you work isn't the way I work...

Just as rain and snow descend from the skies
and don't go back until they've watered the earth,

Doing their work of making things grow and blossom,
producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry,

So will the words that come out of my mouth
   not come back empty-handed.


They'll do the work I sent them to do,
   they'll complete the assignment I gave them."
~Isaiah 55:10

I laughed.  I cried.

This avalanche my soul's been covered with — this avalanche of worry — cannot keep me from God's ways.

God will make a way to me — even in this avalanche.

God is already making a way in me -- because His word is in me.

It's that simple.

It's that profound.

It's that true.

Whisper To You
God's word in you — all those quiet times you've savored and swallowed His words –
– whether on a written page in Scripture,
– in the voice of a friend praying with you,
– in the stars you see at night,
– or the sun that warms your skin by day
... God's word in you is not going to return void.

You don't need to know how it's going to happen.  Just keep walking in the direction He is calling you to enter.

His word — alive in you — and me — through the heartbeat of Jesus in us — will not fail to bring you through.

Jesus is here to stay.  His words are going to blossom, no matter how dry or brittle the soil is.

Because you see — poppies are drought tolerant.  Their beautiful petals thrive on well-drained sandy or cindery dry soils.  At night time or during cold, windy or cloudy weather California poppy flowers close.

But, when morning comes or the weather conditions pass from harsh to mild, poppy flowers open up and stand in the brilliance of color.

There is another view for us to journey through — you and me.  And I'd like to whisper some good news to you, as it was spoken to me.

You. are. good. soil.

There is a beautiful view for us to take in.

It's not one we can see going up uphill.

This is beauty that moves in, with the midst of morning dew  – as we journey downward.

Downward.  It's the kind of beauty that the One who created you promises to blossom in you.  It's His seed — His word, coming alive in you.

You and I will see it emerge together.  Down by the oak tree where our journey downhill will lead us.  Right next to cool waters of the creek hidden below.  Even when it's sown in tears and sorrow, I'll see petals of His love and His presence, opening up in you.

God Will Make A Way
Today, if you are staring downhill, hesitant to begin — or continue — your faith journey as it leads you to descend where you once stood — know for certain: God will make a way in the desert.

You and I don't have to do a thing, other than crawl into His arms that are reaching out to embrace you.  He has already made His way to where you are standing, waiting and wondering.

He's made a way into your heart — and He promises to never leave — because He has made His home — within you.



The desert and the parched land will be glad;

the wilderness will rejoice and blossom.

Like the crocus, it will burst into bloom...

Encourage the exhausted, and strengthen the feeble.

Say to those with anxious heart,
"Take courage, fear not.
Behold, your God will come...He will save you."

Isaiah 35:1-4

~~~~~

What is God whispering to you on your faith journey today?

How is God making a way for you?

Pull up a chair. Click to comment.
We encourage each other, sharing the journey. As is.

~~~~~

By Bonnie Gray, the Faith Barista, serving up shots of faith for everyday life.

Swap stories & join Bonnie on her blog — as she journeys ahead with faith friends along the way.



An Open Letter To The Girl In The Dressing Room.
Aug 30, 2012 01:10 am | Lauren Alexander


Photo Credit

Precious girl,

I don't know if you meant to weep that loudly or not.  I'm not sure if those were quiet sobs that had reached the point of no return, or if this was actually your way of pulling back the curtain on your pain for all to see – what the mirror has done, the lies it has told you, the way it has limited and so poorly defined you.

I so connected with your feelings that I was ready to barge in that dressing room at Lane Bryant and take your face into my hands like you were my own sister and tell those feelings that lie to you what's up.  Aren't you counting your lucky stars that I showed shreds of self-control?  Plus, the thing about barging into strangers' dressing rooms to preach a Psalm 139 sermon is that law enforcement might not take too kindly to it.

I too remember the stores, the feelings of failure and inferiority, the ways those images I saw in the mirror morphed into these big lies I started to believe about me.

The Enemy had a field day with me. 

But he won't get you like he got at me if I have anything to say about it.  Look, I know this next part will make you all kinds of uncomfortable.  At first.  But I will pause to pray right now that you could trust me, a stranger...and trust the heart of a God who is enthralled with you.

I just wanted to pass a note to tell you that you're so lovely. 

That red hair–did you know women spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to get their own strands shaded the way God has so artfully hued yours?  It was shiny too, and if you write back, please let me know what products you are using because I would also like to use them since they ARE WORKING AND EVERYTHING. But I digress.

Your skin with nary a blemish– as I watched you try on some things that didn't fit and get discouraged, what you couldn't see was just how beautiful you looked in so many different colors.  God made you a special canvas to display His glory, friend.

I know it sure doesn't feel like that now.  I completely understand.  But could I pause to tell you a little secret?

Satan keeps lying to you in those dressing rooms and messing with your image of yourself in that mirror because he is afraid.  He's afraid of what will happen if you offered the beauty of your brokenness.  He's scared of what will become of his treachery if exposed by God's glory inside you.  He knows the most powerful thing in this world is somebody who knows who they are and WHOSE they are...when we take off the smock of lies we've donned and exchange it for a garment of strength and dignity.

I heard it in your tears: deep vulnerability.

"You see, beauty indwells every woman.... it reveals itself for a moment, then fades back into cover. Usually it comes when she doesn't know it...Rather, something is happening that allows her defenses to come down for a moment. For instance, when someone is listening. She knows that she matters. Someone cares about her heart, wants to know her. Her beauty emerges as if from behind a veil."  Captivating, John and Stasi Eldredge

Come out of that dressing room and offer your precious beauty to a world that's truly starved for it.

{And don't forget to bring your hair products.}



Love,

Lauren from The A* Team

[Judy Harder]

Falling for Fall {5 Things to Do Now}
Aug 31, 2012 01:20 am | Melissa Michaels


I love fall. I love everything about it. Yes, I know in some parts of the country the arrival of Fall also signals that a long cold winter is near. But I don't like to think that way. I don't want to live in dread of a cold dark season when I can enjoy the gifts in front of me right at this moment.

I like to embrace Fall as something special that happens just once a year, from September through November. The sometimes still warm-enough sunny season when leaves are turning brilliant shades of orange and brown and red, nights are cool and cozy and the smell of pumpkins, cloves and cinnamon fill my kitchen. That is a great season!

I try to find something to love about every season, but Fall is definitely my favorite.

While we are still in summer mode around our house (school doesn't start until next week!), I am starting to let my mind wander to all the things I love about Fall.



Here are 5 things you can do right now to embrace the season ahead!


1. Slowly transition from summer decor to fall.
I love to use subtle touches rather than go all out with theme or seasonal decor. Perfect fall decor for me would be a few leaves, pine cones, moss or apples gathered together in a simple centerpiece. I've written a lot about Fall decor, you might find some inspiration by scrolling through my Fall decorating category on my blog.

2. Do some early Fall yard clean up!
I shared lots of tips here for things you might want to think about now to prepare your yard & garden for fall.

3. Finish your outside painting projects!
Once the weather gets too cold you can't paint outside any longer so give your furniture and accessories a fresh coat of paint while you still can!  I recently painted a Goodwill owl by taking him outside on the lawn to spray paint, you can see how he turned out here!

Now is also a great time to get that front door painted so it will be fresh and pretty for your seasonal wreaths and welcoming guests! I'm speaking to myself here, I've been dragging my feet forever on deciding what color to paint mine. Here are some pretty door colors to inspire you!

4. Establish Fall homemaking routines.
I have several homemaking routines that I use to keep my life sane. My house is not perfectly clean by any stretch of the imagination, but the regular daily routines I've established help keep my house from getting out of control. Fall is the perfect time to just say no to CHAOS and get yourself going on a few simple routines that will make this season more enjoyable!

Here is a post outlining my daily routines:

Four Simple Homemaking Routines {How I Keep My Home Clean Enough}

5. Prayerfully set Fall goals and set up or organize your family command center.
Fall tends to be the season where kids go back to school and life goes back to a regular rhythm. For most of us that rhythm can be at quite a fast pace, so a command center (I use the chalkboard, in the photo above) and a few Fall goals can help ease that transition!

Here are a few posts to inspire you as you get organized for Fall:

When Good Enough is Good Enough
When You Think Your House is Too Small to Be Organized

God made Fall beautiful in so many ways, it really is my favorite season.

What is your favorite thing about Fall?

Every year (for the past five years!) I host a big month long Fall Nesting party at The Inspired Room. If you want inspiration for getting your home in order and pretty for fall and the upcoming holidays, join us at The Inspired Room anytime!





Chapter 1, Food: Guest Post
Aug 31, 2012 01:15 am | Hayley @ The Tiny Twig


Americans seem to have a love/hate relationship with food.  On one hand, we appear unable to gather without food.  On the other hand, eavesdrop on a group of 10 or 20 women long enough and you're bound to catch wind of someone's issues with weight or diet.  We look to food for entertainment, comfort, and pleasure.  We oftentimes seek convenience before nourishment.

A significant portion of most families' monthly budget go to food.  But, are we spending more than we need?  And are we spending our money on quality or ease?  These are uncomfortable questions, especially when the lines between "needing to eat" and "wanting to eat" are so easily smudged.



I should first admit, I read 7 as a passive observer.  As much as I'm inclined to crazy projects and self-imposed plans, I decided to read 7 and take in the wisdom without feeling compelled to mimic the actions.  And, because I read for the enjoyment of the words, the words are what stuck out to me.  Instead of feeling solidarity in a loathing of dry chicken breast, I felt joy in the prose.  I loved that Jen repeatedly talked about not making 7 into law.  I read her words and ran with the heart of her ideas.

This stuck out to me.  This challenged me.  This started a chain reaction in my life.  This chain of letters, these lines and words, these are what have started a months long look at what it means to have and to have not.

I thought about these seven healthy foods jam-packed with nutrition, fueling my body. My energy has doubled and I feel really good. I have the luxury of eating healthy, organic food, an extravagance in most of the world...I realized my slightly reduced life is still extraordinary in every way. There is no end to my advantages. For whatever reason I was born into privilege; I've never known hunger, poverty, or despair.

What started out as a discussion about a fast from food, quickly turned from a millennia-old practice into a modern day challenge.  How can I celebrate being in such excess when others have so little?  How is it possible to continue to live in such a way, knowing full well how little others have.  These thoughts bled slowly out of the kitchen and into all my waking (and non-mealtime) moments.





My heart turned toward living in a way that allows my life to have a beautiful cadence.  One where the "haves" and the "have nots" dine together and are celebrated equally.  My desire turned to parenting my boys in a way that would illustrate to them that the pizza delivery on a Friday night is an absolutely extraordinary blessing in the scope of the world's population.

There was an article recently that got my heart aching and my mind racing.  Did you know that 40% of the food in America goes wasted, yet 1 in 6 American's haven't enough to eat?  Clearly, this is not a supply issue.  The problem isn't that we have too many people to feed, or that we cannot grow enough food to feed the hungry.  The problem is, the "haves" are taking more than we need without thought.

I started to wonder, if I was more careful with my grocery planning and budget, could I give that money to feed local people who are hungry?  Our church has a food pantry, and it is running terribly dry.  Even in our affluent county, there is a high need for food.  So, recently, I've decided to carefully plan our meals and buy only what we need.  With the newly found room in our grocery budget, I'm buying items on the "most needed" list for our food pantry.  A 44 cent box of cornbread mix isn't much to me, but it's a lot to a momma who is struggling to feed her babies.

By Hayley at Tiny Twig

***

Did Jen inspire you to stick to 7 foods for a month? Did this chapter make you step back and reflect on what you're serving on your dinner table each night? If Month One of 7 made an impact on you, we want to hear about it! Link up your posts below or share in the comments!

[Judy Harder]

 Sunday Scripture
Sep 02, 2012 01:20 am | incourage




"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

~Matthew 11:28-30

[Judy Harder]

What Your Difficult Today Really Means
Sep 03, 2012 01:20 am | Kristen Strong




"We serve a God who does way past your way past."  Priscilla Shirer

She sobs a puddle in my arms, and I find my own tears mixing in with hers.

"Mama, sometimes I just want to be able to do the one thing I can't do."

Haven't we all felt this way?

It's been 8 months since Faith's surgery correcting her broken neck, and we rejoice the surgery was a complete success. She is able to participate in miles more than we were told would be possible. But as far as those miles take her, she can never resume her first love: gymnastics.

Most days, she plays contentedly with pretty cartwheels and whatnot. But from time to time the itch to push the limits of what is physically wise surfaces, so I furrow my brows and break out the dreaded no. Her two closest friends are knee-deep in gymnastics, therefore reminders and conversation surrounding the sport lean close. And while Faith generally doesn't mind this and has made leaping strides in accepting she can't further participate in gymnastics herself, she misses it.

She pulls away from my arms, watery doe eyes looking straight at me. She shakes her head and sighs,

"Nothin' is as fun as gymnastics."

I tell her it's okay to feel that way. Because there ain't nothin' fun about dreams dying or loves leaving.

She genuinely gives thanks for so much. She knows when God closes one door He opens another. She believes in faith that something better is coming tomorrow, even if she can't see it today.

But...

Today it hurts, and the pain of today makes the promises of tomorrow feel far away.

I read words from Ephesians, where Paul writes of our God who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we ask or think. God's dreams for us are way past anything we can fathom. But even if we know that we know this is true, today it hurts.

In the Faithful Abundant True Bible study, Priscilla Shirer explains it this way:

"His way past is so beyond our wildest imagination that it doesn't necessarily mean it's a matter of making us happy right here and now. His kingdom purposes are so beyond. They are so grand and are being worked out in such a way that they might be beyond our mental capacity to comprehend."

He uses everything – especially our unhappy todays – to prepare us for His promise of better tomorrows.

My eyes move further back in Ephesians, and I see Paul mentions "the unsearchable riches of Christ." A bit more research and I am amazed by the translation comparisons for these unsearchable riches, or rather His extraordinary plans:

Endless treasures.

Unfathomable riches.

Immeasurable wealth.

Inexhaustible riches and generosity of Christ.

When our hearts ache over lost loves or dying dreams, we latch onto healing and hope through faith that God has a game plan in store for us that will blow our ever-loving minds. Because God's 'way past' dreams for us make our own look like the dollar store variety.

It isn't easy to believe His 'no' today is for a better 'yes' tomorrow. But God is good all the time. Everything is a grace from Him, even our unhappy todays.

How do you latch onto hope during difficult todays? How have you seen their purpose in creating better tomorrows?

Kristen Strong, Chasing Blue Skies

[Judy Harder]

Be Brave
Sep 04, 2012 01:10 am | heather



To live life to the fullest requires one to be brave. After all, life is an adventure of moving from what is known to what is new. It's a journey that requires both courage and faith. Looking back, every life altering decision I have ever made proves it to be so...

Accepting that first dinner invitation from a handsome boy with the kind blue eyes; the boy who would, one day, become my husband. Brave.

Picking up stakes and moving away from my roots in order to start a new life after college graduation. Brave.

Leaving my career so that I could be available to my children full-time, even when the budget said it was impossible. Brave.

Starting the process of bringing home our fourth child through domestic infant adoption. Brave!

Every one of these milestones in my life required more courage than I can muster on my own. And yet, a refusal to step in faith, because of fear, would have denied me great blessing and purpose in my life. It's not that I am a naturally courageous woman. To the contrary, my first inclination is to hunker down and take the safe road. Still, when God puts His best in front of me, I am challenged to be brave. By His power, I want to see what is on the other side of that fear more than I want to hide in my bunker. I suspect I am not alone. In fact, it's a familiar battle waged in the heart of every believer. The unknown is scary. But faith in God trumps fear. Every time!

The Bible declares that God wants His people to be brave. "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." (Joshua 1:9) As women of faith, we are not exempt from that challenge. To the contrary, we are called to walk in faith in spite of our fear.

Consider Deborah. One of the great judges of Israel, Deborah led her people during a time of overwhelming cruelty and oppression. Despite her fears, and I am sure she had them, God called Deborah into battle. Courage, coupled with complete faith in God, led Deborah to grand victory and her people to deliverance. I believe that God used this single woman, the only female judge in Israel's history, to teach us that women must not shrink from life's challenges. Like Deborah, we are all called to be brave, to leave our comfort zones, and follow God's lead.
Confucius wisely declared, "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." What he failed to point out is that each single step will require faith and courage you do not possess on your own. Deborah had to follow God and leave the security of her judgement seat in order to win victory on the battlefield. The same is true for you and me today, dear sister in Christ.

So, Dear One, put on your armor, take a deep breath, and pray for courage. Then take that first step out of your comfort zone and resolve to follow God's call on your life. To be sure, it won't be easy. It's okay to admit you are afraid. But, the world is waiting. The time is now. Go on, Daughter of the King. Put your faith in action. It's time to be brave.

By Heather Arbuckle

[Judy Harder]

Encouragement is a Powerful Thing

Sep 04, 2012 03:43 pm | Mary Carver


I walked quickly through the parking lot, pulling my wiggly four-year-old along, sweating and praying I could make it to the car before the tears spilled out.

No such luck.

As I reached my car, I heard my friend holler out her window, "And just where do you think you're going? Hold on! I'll pull around."

And so she did. I opened the door for my kiddo and turned on the car and its blessedly cool air conditioning while my friend parked her car next to mine and waited for me to walk around to her. Before I could finish saying, "Hey . . ." the stupid tears were slipping past my oversized sunglasses and down my red cheeks.

I told her my story, sniffling and rolling my eyes and whisper-shouting so the kids wouldn't hear. Like a good friend, she agreed with my take on the situation and said the words everyone longs to hear in the midst of an angry cry: "You're right."

She didn't stop there, though. As she maneuvered her two little boys and newborn baby girl out of her van, she said, "You let me know what I can do. If you need me to babysit or host some play dates, I'll do it. I'll help you! I want to help."

Then, after I tied her baby wrap and waited for her boys to move away from my car, we laughed at our awkward parking lot dance. She said, "Oh, I wish this wasn't happening right now. I know you want to leave." And I thought, "Oh, I'm so glad this is happening right now. What a blessing I would've missed if I'd already left."

It was just a moment – and just a chance meeting, really. As my friend pulled into the parking lot, flustered with her own story, she had no idea that I was speed walking to my car, overwhelmed with mine. But she knew, when she saw me, that I needed some encouragement. And despite the three kids in her car and her own frustrations and worries, she took a few minutes to listen, to hug, to care.

And it meant a lot to me, that caring, that friendship, that encouragement. Because encouragement is a powerful thing. Whether someone has died, moved, gotten a new job, suffered a disappointment, gotten engaged or just found out that she accidentally enrolled her daughter in the wrong preschool class, a kind word goes such a long way.

How do you encourage friends and family? How do they encourage you?




The Particular Problem of Stripey Flats
Sep 05, 2012 01:10 am | Flower Patch Farmgirl


Six months ago, I whittled my embarrassingly vast wardrobe down to nine paltry items for thirty days, on journey with Jen Hatmaker's 7.

Today, I stomped around town in pink and orange striped flats, bought for a song at our local grocery store.

These flats encapsulate my inner struggle so perfectly that I'm tempted to leave well enough alone and let them do the talking. But in the end, no one can be expected to concentrate when it comes to talking grocery store shoes – no matter how cute they are.

Here's the deal, I'm not really "that girl". That girl is off somewhere teetering around in four-inch Louboutins, or at least wearing trendy jeans, right? She's not you or me.  She shops online under cloak of night.  She stuffs bags in the back of the closet when her husband isn't looking. She maxes out all her cards. She's the one who has the big, bad problem. Not this girl. This girl doesn't shop that often. She always pays cash. She's not a name-brand sort of girl. She finds bargains that will make a weaker sister weep.

Do you hear that? That's the sound of rationalizations, or as I like to call them, lies.

Because the real truth is, I just really love buying clothes. Clothes I don't need. Clothes I don't even love. I can't possibly be expected to go to TJ Maxx without bringing home a new shirt. I skim those racks so fast it would make your eyelids twitch and oh, will I ever snap something up. It might be a seventeenth gray t-shirt or a thirtieth striped little number. It might possibly be an ill-fitting prairie-girl blouse that I will never wear but that I must have because I'm stuck in a short-lived cowgirl fantasy.

What I'm trying to say is, I'm Pavlov's dog and "clearance rack" makes me drool.

When I read 7, I did what any fashionista (recovering, repressed, or otherwise) would do – I stuck my head under the covers and tried to believe that the problem wasn't mine. I stayed there longer than you'd think, but every time I poked my head out, my closet stared me down, the stacks of "smart" purchases sneering back, daring me to tell the truth – that I'm consumer-driven. I care more than I should about my image. I'm greedy. I'm entitled.

So, I jumped in. I fudged Jen's  number (I promise, it's allowed) and picked 9 items to wear for a month. (You can read all about it here.) In the end, I survived. In many ways, I thrived. And okay, fine, there were isolated moments of muttering unkind words about Jen Hatmaker under my breath as I pulled the hateful red Henley over my head for the umpteenth time.

March came and went but part of me remained changed. No, I didn't burn my entire wardrobe when the month was up. I didn't even donate it to charity. But I now take a harder look at the $12.99 wonder making eyes at me. I'm uncovering the unique beauty of being content with what I already have and, even more shocking, what my kids already have (that's a whole 'nother post).

I have 30 days of proof that what I wear doesn't make me happier, smarter, or more interesting. I don't need three kinds of gingham competing for my attention. Life without stripes is still worth living.

I'm not there yet. I'm still right here, a mess of humanity in frivolous shoes. But my one-month experiment with 7 brought me closer to the edge of less me, more Him. That's a journey worth taking in any old shoes.

By Shannan Martin



Community matters
Sep 05, 2012 01:20 am | Robin Dance



It was good and it was grace and it was gift I never expected; in fact, I had imagined the opposite.
Headed to a place thousands of miles from home where we didn't know a soul, not speaking or understanding the language, differences in culture and customs, there was ZERO expectation of finding community.  Sure, my husband would be meeting people through work, but how long would it take me to meet people.  And not just how long, but how?

An overseas move, even if it's only temporary, requires enormous preparation.  With a mile-long Must-Get-Done List, it was easy enough to push apprehension and fear to the farthest corners of my mind–isolation, loneliness, missing my children and homesickness–all lingered as possibility.  But I was determined not to wallow in possibilities before I even left home, so I just talked to God about it and asked others to pray.

And then we landed 4,800 miles from home.

Instead of meeting isolation and loneliness, however, we found a warm and friendly people welcoming us into their homes and lives, obliterating misconceptions and perceived barriers and stereotypes.

Germans have a wonderful tradition called Stammtisch, loosely defined as a gathering among regulars.  In the past sometimes associated with social status, today Stammtish is all about community, intimacy and common interests(1).  Two on-going invites were extend–one my husband and I could attend for dinner each week, and a separate women's twice-a-month breakfast group–immediately brought me together with the same people on a regular basis.  Our common ground was the ability to speak English, half a dozen nationalities mingling as one.

I (re)learned a valuable lesson from the generosity and kindness of these strangers:  community matters.
Over the past seven months I've imagined what my life would have looked like in Germany without these gatherings; lonely thoughts answer.  And though community isn't limited to those who follow Christ (i.e., stammtisch is not a faith-based gathering), when you share a common faith, roots grow deep and wide...they reach for eternity.

Because it's important to God we talk a lot about community at incourage; it's why we created an event to encourage you to connect with the women in your backyard. We know God is relational and we're created in his image.  As early as Creation, it's clear humans are wired for community because it wasn't good for the one to be alone. 

Finding and nurturing community makes a significant difference in quality of life and is unquestionably worth the effort.
I've endured seasons when community was ellusive and I've taken for granted times of plenty.  Both perspectives inform my response to Lisa-Jo's question for us this week:   "What does community mean to you?"

Community is...

an answer to prayer (Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.)

an illustration of the body of Christ ("Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body...")

In community, among the company of others...

I thrive.

I'm energized.

I'm able to give...and receive.

Wounded places are healed.

I become fully alive, more like myself than when I'm isolated.

And here's the jaw-dropping paradox:

Community doesn't happen when I'm seeking community.
Community happens when I'm seeking Christ.
"Seek the Kingdom of God above all else,
and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need."
~ Matthew 6:33 NLT

When I was scurrying around preparing for our assignment in Germany, I already mentioned I talked to God about it and asked others to pray.  He knew my heart, what I feared would be lacking.  I trusted this opportunity was of his choosing, for his purposes.

I didn't pray for community; I prayed that God would reveal himself in ways we couldn't anticipate, that we'd trust his leading and be Christ to those who might not yet know him.

I'm a little ashamed to be surprised at the beautiful community we've discovered.  But isn't that just like Jesus to respond in a way we might not expect, ultimately far better than we hoped or imagined?  How would you complete the sentence, "Community is______"?   How has community surprised you?

By Robin Dance who's currently wrestling time relative to motherhood, stillness and the Divine.  If you hurry there's still time to enter her giveaway for one of Lisa Leonard's Heartfelt Collection pieces.

[Judy Harder]

On Comparison
Sep 06, 2012 01:20 am | Dawn Camp

As we drive down the road, my 12-year-old daughter mopes, "Someone unfollowed me on Instagram today."

Really? My pre-teen actually knows how many people follow her and notices when when one stops?

"It's all about the numbers and how many people follow you," adds my 15-year-old daughter.

Honestly, I'm stunned.

Comparisons are helpful: when checking features on big purchases; determining the best price (I comparison shop with the Amazon app on my phone all the time); looking at nutrition facts on food packaging. When we shift our gaze to people, however, comparisons can discourage, debilitate, and depress (or puff us up with pride, depending on how we rate ourselves in the comparison).

My kids fell into the same trap that hooked me six years ago when I started blogging (and I'd be lying if I said I didn't struggle with it still): the numbers game. Why do we need to compare ourselves—or our fans and followers—to others to feel important? Aren't solid connections with names and faces that we recognize better than being observed by strangers?

But in a culture where everyone thinks they're a rockstar, what do you expect?

I roll my eyes now when Klout emails me to say that my score has dropped; apparently I don't put the hours into Twitter and Facebook that they deem worthy. Show me a score that measures face-to-face interaction, how much time I spend doing laundry, and whether my husband and children feel loved.

Can I spend so much time chasing numbers that I cease to live a life worth writing about in the first place?

I want to spend my days striving to follow Him instead of worrying about who's following me.

What about you?




Ungodly Comparison
Sep 06, 2012 01:10 am | Sarah Rogers




God has given me the precious gift of being surrounded by a multitude of amazing women.

I have friends that I admire on a daily basis for the way that they exemplify His character, His hands, His mouth, His heart.

This special blessing is not hidden from the Enemy.  He knows these things about my life.
He sees the treasures I've been given to come in contact with so many examples of godly women.
He also knows the burning desire I have to please God, to be the best me possible, to fully live out my potential...
And oh, how the Enemy can work to twist my best intentions into something ugly.

Somehow, a sense of admiration for another woman's caring deed or a godly charcteristic can quickly turn to comparison.  This comparison feels justified because I'm measuring myself against all positive, God-pleasing qualities.  Then, unconsciously, woeful comparison turns to jealousy and a niggling feeling of insufficiency because I'm not doing what they're doing, and therefore, God (and everyone else) must be observing that I don't measure up.

Though my mind doesn't recognize that this is jealousy at first, the Spirit alerts my heart that something is amiss with her frustrated state.

Knowing I must seek a solution in His words, as always, there is gentle but obvious nudge if I pay attention (which often takes longer than it should), and freedom settles into my wound-up heart as I read:

"You are jealous of one another...
Doesn't that prove you are controlled by your sinful nature?  Aren't you living like people of the world?"
-1 Corinthians 3:3

Paul was writing to Christians.  He knew that they would be jealous of one another if they didn't keep their perspectives focused on God, and was he ever so right.  For when I am in unity with my Jesus, I am well aware of His specific promptings on my heart.  I know when He's asking me to do something, and I know when I'm putting pressure on myself to be someone else.  There's a stark contrast between His leading my life and my jealous desires to "measure up" to other godly women.

He reminds me that I can be blessed by seeing others follow Him, but I can't be bothered by it.  All that does is allow division, disunity, and just plain grumpiness to take root.

Oh, the freedom He wants to let me rest in.  Sometimes, my overcomplicating of His desires for me cause so much pain and so much more work for my heart.  If I can just remember to rest in His plan and gifting in my life, then I can be perfectly happy when I see him working Himself out in their lives.

[Judy Harder]

You Know You're in Community When...{Link Up and Win!}
Sep 07, 2012 01:20 am | Mary Carver




Are you living in community?

That question sure seems to be popular right now. The encouragement to develop authentic, doing-life-together relationships with people, the chastisement to stop hiding, stop being afraid of getting hurt – it's all the rage, isn't it?

So we're all plodding along, pushing through our fears, our nerves, our past experience that tells us people can be challenging and relationships can be complicated. We're accepting invitations, asking hard questions, offering a hand or a hug to someone who needs it.

But how do you know when you're finally doing it, when you're doing life together, when you're living in community?

True community can be elusive, like the unicorn or Smurfs. But after searching for it so long with such determination, you want to know when you've found it, am I right?! Lucky for you, I've figured out exactly how to know when you've really found community – and I'm happy to share.

How to Know if You've Found Community
Now, you might think that the first clue that you've created real community among your group of friends is when you get a phone call – or worse, hear the doorbell ring – and realize your friends are going to see your not-ready-for-company house, and you don't panic. (Sure, you might shove a few things in the hall closet, but that's normal.)

Or you might think that true community is clearly happening when you get together with friends and their families, and throughout the evening you realize someone else is feeding your child while you're wiping her kid's nose and your friend just hollered at your husband for his off-color joke while her husband just asked you for the recipe for the brownies in the kitchen.

Then again, maybe you've recognized community when you find yourself needing help – a spare tire, a last-minute babysitter, a couch to crash on halfway through your road trip – and you know exactly who to call. And you don't even feel guilty or nervous about asking.

Or maybe it's when you find yourself hugging your friend's parents at the birthday party without that awkward I-don't-really-know-you-but-I'm-hugging-you feeling, texting her just to say you're thinking of her, opening drawers and looking for the salad tongs instead of asking where they are, confessing your deepest secrets and listening to hers, laughing until you cry over remember-when stories and inside jokes, or spending the night debating everything from the best season of The Office to theology and politics to the appropriate way to wear skinny jeans.

But for me, community – true, authentic, in-your-face-and-your-heart community – has never been more apparent than the night I shared with my friends that I had a bad case of poison ivy. (Yes. Again.) And their response? It was not sympathetic murmurs and gentle hugs, nor was it offers of home remedies or their own poison whatever survival stories. No, ma'am. My friends, my people, my community LAUGHED AT ME.

Oh yes! They laughed. And they mocked. And they said things like, "Really? What kind of, ahem, extracurricular activities were you doing at the church picnic to get poison ivy THERE?"

And as I sat there with tears in my eyes from laughing so hard, I thought, "Yes. This is community. This comfortable like my stretchy pajama pants, familiar as my own reflection, laugh at you and with you, call you out on your crazy and hug you through it family – this is community."

Now it's time for the $64,000 question . . .

Have YOU found community? How did you know when you'd found it?
(in)RL GIVEAWAY: Won't you share in the comments or link up your stories below? We'd love to hear your heart as we all "check-in" on how we're doing with this whole community thing.

And we'd love to give one of you who shares our brand new, hot off the presses, DayBrightener from (in)courage. It's full of quotes from this community – from our friendship-lovin'-hearts to yours!

—>snag yours over here – they're only $9.99!



Chapter 2: Clothes- Link Up!
Sep 07, 2012 01:10 am | incourage




If Chapter 2 of 7 by Jen Hatmaker was a doozy for you, we want to know about it! It has been so interesting reading through the comments from Monday's post to hear your thoughts on clothes and excess. We're sharing a bit from Sarah and Kayla below on how this chapter changed them. Click on over to their blogs to read the full story!  We'd love for you to add your voice to the conversation, too!

Just link up your post on this month's topic below, or share in the comments!
{Sarah @ Truth in the Journey}
I have a confession to make.  I dress the way I do so that you'll like me. You, women. I try to impress you with my wardrobe. You see it isn't just our culture that is obsessed with fashion. It's me, maybe you, and millions of other women in the church.

Why? There is a long list of reasons (pride, feeling rejected, wanting to be loved, etc.) and it's important to figure out which one is driving us. Because the reason matters. We spend money on clothes, we spend even more time thinking about them, and probably even more time coveting them. This is more than a waste of time. We're told to look to the things above, not to the things here on this earth. That isn't just a friendly suggestion. It's the reason for our very existence.

click here to continue reading...

{Kayla Aimee @ Only Slightly Neurotic}
After I read 7 I saw abundance everywhere. There was the fruitful, the "I came so that you may have life and have it in abundance" and there was the amassed, the abundance of things that I collected and held on to so tightly that it kept the former at bay.

7 changed my entire life.

But the breakthrough came in my closet. That's not even a spiritual metaphor.