(IN)Courage

[Judy Harder]

Not Perfect, But Well
Jan 27, 2012 Lisa Whittle




"What is it that keeps us from starting down the road to wholeness? It is not that God turns our contrite hearts away. It's just that we do not always allow ourselves to go to such depth and vulnerability. Instead, we claw and grasp and reach and strain to stay afloat by our own efforts. All the while Jesus wants us to face the end of ourselves so He can fully begin."  ~{w}hole

{wholeness: soul wellness}

There is no perfect life, no perfect marriage, family, or any earthly thing.  This, I know.

And yet, there is a place inside of me that still wishes I can be – that today will be the day that every hair falls in place, every flaw melts away, every second is filled with sweetness.

My humanity holds onto the idea that in order to have a full life, it must always go perfectly well.  The truth is, it never always will.

I have come to believe that God is gracious to allow us the lesson early, even in the small things that hurt so big – the playground words that have never left us, the way our nose was oversized and other kids noticed...how our parents didn't have much money and how that made us learn about struggle before we really understood it.  Because it is in our perception of perfection, oftentimes, that we miss the richness of reality.

Our life won't be perfect.

But it can be well.

A life that is always safe, always predictable, always able to be controlled by our wants and our will speaks to our fleshly desire for perfection.

But a life that knows true and lasting peace, joy, a thriving relationship with Jesus, a passion for the Gospel, and core fulfillment speaks to our soul's need to be whole.

While the world around us may change, soul wellness is about the permanency of God.

Loving the messy church, despite its flaws...remembering that our religion is something different than our God.
Enjoying a deep, thriving relationship with God whereby we feel a palpable sense of His presence on our daily journey.
Caring about people we have never met, simply because the Gospel has infected us and we can't live apart from its Cause.
Having peace — an inexplicably settled spirit and eternal perspective — even when the world does not play nice.
Living with joy that comes from a deep, organic place and lasts longer than brief, happy moments.
Experiencing fulfillment of the lasting kind that helps us live out our passion and purpose.
A perfect life says...I want to impress other people.

A whole life says...I don't need others to say I'm worthy.

A perfect life says...things can't ever go wrong.

A whole life says...when things go wrong, my soul can still be well.

My friends, until the day we finally see Jesus and become whole in the most completed sense...may we come to the end of ourselves so He can fully begin.

***




Remembering Whose We Are
Jan 27, 2012 Especially Heather




I have written on this subject so many times, yet I still need to be reminded of it daily.  I need to be reminded that God only has my best at heart, even when He seems so far away.  I have been rereading a book (Stones of Remembrance) that I bought when I first found out that I had brain cancer.  Upon reading the things that I wrote in the margins, I wonder to myself "where did that girl go?"

The girl that had rock solid faith.

The girl that did not doubt, because she relied whole heartily on her Father.

The girl that trusted her God through the worst diagnosis and prognosis imaginable.

As a I continued to read, I came across the words below:

Crossing Over Our Jordan River

We don't know when God will get us over the river. We don't know how God will dry the riverbed and allow us to cross. But we do know, by faith, that he will act on our behalf. And while we wait, we remember.

We remember our Red Seas, the places where God has parted the waters for us, the impossible places where God came through and the Enemy was defeated

We remember who brought us through.

We remember whose we are. We belong to Christ!

We remember that God's delays are not delays of inactivity, but of preparation. He delays, but he does not deny. While we wait He prepares us for His answer according to His perfect, preordained plan.

We remember and link up with like-minded, stronger people who are going in the same direction. We cant afford to attempt the waters of Jordan alone.

We remember to tell our children, and our children's children that they may see the mighty hand of God and take courage for the rivers they will have to cross. They piggyback on our faith when we share the stories of God's mighty acts in our lives.

We remember to offer encouragement for our friends who walk beside us along the way

~Stones of Remembrance.

In the margin next to it I wrote in bold capital letters "Remember these words when you doubt, because you will doubt.  Satan will attack your heart and your mind, he is the master of lies and deceit.  Guard your heart, because there will come a time when you will not feel this strong."


Those words spoke volumes to my heart right now, especially since tomorrow marks 9 months that we let go of our 9 year old daughter and released her into His hands.

9 months of pain, grief, anger, denial.. 9 months of questions with no answers.

Yet I still have to remind myself that during these past 9 months, He has also brought comfort, healing, rest, and peace.

He is still God. He is still sovereign. Our steps were planned long before there was time. I don't understand His ways, but I trust His ways.

I don't understand His will, but I know that He will not abandon me, even when I run far away from His heart and plans for my life.

"I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out; plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.   ~Jeremiah 29:11″

He still has it all under control....

Pain That Scars
Jan 27, 2012 12:00 am | Natasha Metzler




She sat quiet and still with such deep pain etched on her face, it hurt to look at her. She did not say a word but her lack of speech said plenty. It said that she was having a hard time sleeping again. It said that she was feeling alone and sad and angry. It said that she wanted to crawl into a hole and protect herself from everything around her. It said that every breath that tore through her lungs was just a reminder that a tiny infant she carried for eight and a half months...never breathed.

She was bleeding raw with a wound so deep and jagged it will be impossible for it to ever be smooth. The rough and ragged edges will heal slowly with a constant ache. Forever, the person who she is, who she was, will be marked by that pain.

And she's not the only one.

One after another, I hear the wounds and see the scars and feel the sickening drip of bloody pain. It's the story of life on this sinful broken earth and it is horrible and wrenching and angering.

Death. Infertility. Broken trust. Rebellion. Loss. Broken dreams. Lists and lists of bone-deep sorrows.

I wish... no, I long for some way to explain things. Some secret hidden key to unlock the horror of seeping festering wounds.

A Bible verse. A principle of discipleship. Something. Someway to prove that God has a "happy" thing to counter this depth of sadness.

But guess what? There's not.

We don't have a God who says, in the middle of horrible pain, "I did this because..." There is no explanation. It's not because someone was good or bad or deserved it or didn't deserve it.

It simply is.

And there is no "happy" thing to fix it. For nothing can.

Not another child. Not another dream. Nothing actually replaces what is lost.

Everyone else might forget but the scar-bearer always remembers.

Yet, even in the middle of this raw grating pain, we do have a God. And he does speak, although sometimes we miss it. He doesn't offer explanations but something entirely different.

He says, "I know."

I've never had to face the death of a child but I have experienced my own tastes of death. I've looked at the horrible and not known what to do. I've raged and ranted and screamed, asking why or why not, then crumbled into a heap at God's feet begging for explanation... and I've felt His tears and I've heard His voice.

The truth is that the most precious thing in the middle of pain is to hear that God knows. Not just that He knows about a situation but that He knows my pain. And while I may be angry that He didn't protect me or them or whoever... I also have the knowledge that He didn't protect himself either.

My ideal is to be protected from pain and to help protect others from pain. But God cannot be molded into my ideal. He is who he is.

When Moses asked God who to say sent him, God said, "I AM who I AM." (Exodus 3:14, NIV)

He hasn't changed since then.



And for some reason, this God who IS, the one who created us and loves us, is not afraid of pain. He faces it and He lets us face it.

So those moments that should never be... are.

They were for Adam and Eve, for Abraham, for Job, for David, for every generation since and even for God Himself. So, it makes sense that I will face them and my friends will face them.

Still. It hurts.

So we must cling to the truth. The only truth we have. That our God, the one who IS, the one who created us all, who loves us all... knows.

And we can believe, even in the face of life-altering scars that our Scar-Bearer, Jesus himself, will never leave us nor forsake us.

Never.

Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you; But rejoice, inasmuch, as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.  I Peter 4:12-13 (KJV)

By Natasha, To Live For Him

[Judy Harder]

For When You Let Others Down
Jan 28, 2012  Kristen Welch


I opened the mail.

In an instant, I was furious.

I've been having some medical tests run lately to try and diagnose the chronic pain in my neck. One of the tests was faulty and had to be repeated. It involved needles and electrical current. And tears. So, when I received an $800 bill from a doctor I'd never seen-the one who read and declared the test faulty, I was mad.

It was an insurance nightmare and on my fourth frustrated phone call, I lost it.

I ranted and complained and whined to the billing lady on the other end.

It was ugly.



I was ugly.

I got off the phone and it took about 7.2 seconds for me to get the feeling. You know the one. Conviction.

Oh, but it gets worse.

I called my hubby and told him all about it. He quietly asked, "What is the doctor's name? And the lady you griped at..her name?"

He didn't say anything for a long time after I read the names off the piece of mail.

"Kristen, I'm a pharmaceutical rep. That's one of my offices."

-And now the kick in the gut-

"The girl you just told off is the same one I've been witnessing to and I've even been telling her all about Mercy House."

She knew my name. She knew his name.

I'm sure I don't even need to tell you how terrible I felt. I apologized to my husband. I hit redial and called the lady in the billing department back. I apologized.

Thankfully, she was gracious.

It took a while longer for me to forgive myself. I know I'm human, but I know my temper won that day and I regretted my behavior.

Life is a lesson, isn't it? And my Father God knows how to correct me.

I learned a lot that day: When you disappoint (and you will unless you've got some superhuman gift):

Be quick to admit your failure.
Ask for forgiveness.
Deal with the consequences.
Repeat often.
Do you have a hard time forgiving yourself mistakes? Or when you disappoint others?
by Kristen Welch, We are THAT family

[Judy Harder]

A Letter to the Ethiopian Eunuch
Jan 29, 2012  Amber Haines

Back when the church first began, you traveled to Jerusalem to worship. It's described that your way back home to your Queen and her treasure is a desert road. I imagine your chariot like my car pulled off on the side. Maybe a break to find a little drink. Maybe you say "I can go no further. What is it I'm missing?" You send your questions up, "Who is this humiliated man I'm reading about here? Why is he led to slaughter?"

Far away, right about the time that Stephen is stoned and hearts feel like desert-places, God speaks to Philip, "Go way out of your way for me. Go way into the desert." And the Spirit comes to you there by whispering to Philip as you read in Isaiah. Is he weary, I wonder, until you remind him to speak in scarlet, the story of Jesus?

It must have been so good. Oh I know it was, having been to the desert myself. Deserts make the water so good. When you and Philip see the water and you ask what prevents you from being baptized, and then you get in? What thrills me is that Phillip gets in, too. He gets right in with you – brothers, covered. Did Phillip wonder who was baptizing who?

And like elation from a deep breath, he evaporates, disappears. And your joy, the way you went on rejoicing, as in, you never stopped with it? That part makes me want to sing without care, arms straight up.

It's been 2,000 years, and today Ethiopian men, women, and children are worshipping, all woven with scarlet thread, that joy you brought with the Great Commission. A cancelled adoption process led my husband there to witness it, gospel, a journey to learn how to serve, without bringing home a daughter, one of those desert road experiences that leads to the water.

God's glory is for All. My firstborn asked me to read about it to him, Acts chapter 8, and as I did just 3 months ago, tears filled his eyes, and he spoke your exact words, "What prevents me from being baptized?"

And so he was – on a beautiful Sunday morning in Arkansas, USA. Desert roads up ahead, we read the story – we become the story – and we go on rejoicing.

photo credit
***

Here I've poured out my gratitude for a man who has changed my life, the Ethiopian Eunuch. Let it be that we are not only quick to make requests, but that we are also quick to praise. I praise God for the role of the Ethiopian church in my life, as a part of this global and beautiful body. I praise God, too, for the desert places.

Now your turn! Let us know how God has answered your prayers. Praise Him from whom all blessings flow.

[Judy Harder]

Q & A about our (in)RL Conference – Ask Anything!
I Still Believe
The Peripheral



Q & A about our (in)RL Conference – Ask Anything!
Jan 30, 2012 12:40 am | Lisa-Jo


What on earth is this (in)RL conference you guys keep going on about?
Oh I'm so glad you asked! Start here, with the "Why (in)RL?" video and then we'll try to answer other questions in the post and welcome any more in the comments!
{Subscribers, you can click here to view the video}


Why aren't you guys just having a regular conference?
Well, we thought and prayed about it long and hard. And because the heart of (in)courage is community. We wanted to bring the conference to you rather than ask you to come to us.

We also like that it means we won't need to limit the number of tickets. No one will have to sweat the price of travel and accommodation, and moms won't have to leave their kids or worry about child care. We love that it means no one will have to feel left out in any way, shape or form.

But mostly we love that it gives us a chance to connect women in real life. No travel required. Just (in)courage right where you are as a way to engage with instant, local community. We believe the new friendships you'll make will outlast anything we could organize at a specific location. We want to help you form connections that go beyond the blog post so that you can continue to (in)courage one another in real life for months and even years to come.

How much does it cost to register?
It's only $10 and with that you get an (in)RL t-shirt as well as the Simply Marvelous card pack.

Do I need to register on Eventbrite and RSVP to a meetup?
Yup, register here through Eventbrite so we can send you your (in)RL t-shirt as well as the Simply Marvelous card pack and webcast login details. Then be sure and find a meetup near you and RSVP so that the host knows you'll be attending. The heart of (in)RL is for women to connect in person after all.

What are the meetups for?
Because, like you, we think real life community is essential to grow in friendships and faith, we wanted to give the (in)courage community a chance to connect in real life. We figured it would be a fun surprise to discover other women right in your neighborhood that all spend time at (in)courage on a daily basis. So wouldn't it be great if you could spend time together in real life?

Do you have to be a blogger to attend?
Nope, the (in)RL beach house parties are open to women everywhere – whether you blog, just read blogs or have never heard of a blog. Come one, come all!

What time will the (in)RL meetup start on Saturday?
That will be up to each individual host – check out your local meetup page for details.

How long will the (in)RL meetup last on Saturday?
Again, this is up to each host. But the time frame we're recommending is about 3 hours. Meetup hosts will share time and venue based on varied time zones and we'll be providing video content that meetups can tune into, which explore the topic of gritty, beautiful, messy, real life community together. We have a line up of 8 videos each ranging in length from 6-25 minutes for hosts to choose from on Saturday.

How do I become an (in)RL meetup host?
Yay-we're so glad you asked! First, register for (in)RL so that we can send you your (in)RL t-shirt as well as the Simply Marvelous card pack. Then click over to our meetups page and see if there's one planned in your area already. If there is, why not join them? If not, then go ahead and start a new community meetup.

Where should I host my (in)RL meetup?
Anywhere you feel the most comfortable. Be that your own home, a restaurant, a coffee shop, a park, a spot in your church or a barn. Wherever works for you works for us.

How can I spread the news about my (in)RL meetup?
If you are planning to host, there are downloadable (in)RL invites as well as (in)RL Save the Datesthat you can customize and that are available on the Host page.

Where can I connect with other hosts {and swap ideas}
We'd love if you all (in)couraged one another – bring your questions and genius ideas over here to our ongoing BlogFrog discussion.

What is the Beach House in a Box?
The (in)RL Beach House in a Box is simply a resource for our (in)RL hosts. It includes home décor items and guest giveaway kits available for purchase the first week of February at crazy discounted prices. It's not a must for hosts, just a lovely plus if you're interested.

Where do I purchase a Beach House in a Box?
Starting in February there will be 3 Beach House in a Box Kits available for hosts to purchase at crazy reduced prices (Box 1: $25 for over $115 value, Box 2: $40 for $155 value, Box 3: $55 for $215 value.)

On a scale of 1 to awesome, how awesome do you think it's gonna be?
We're giving it a deep fried chocolate awesome two thumbs up rating. 'Nuff said



Got more questions – we've got loads more answers over here at the (in)RL Q & A page. And we're totally gonna be responding to every question that you can think up in the comments today - yup, go on – lay your (in)RL Q's on us and we'll try and bring all the A's.

with love and anticipation,

Lisa-Jo, (in)RL fan and (in)courage community cheerleader



You may know Jeremy Camp for his hit Christian Contemporary music– he's got nineteen! no. 1 hits and has won several major Dove Awards. He's spending time with us at Bloom (in)courage to share his inspiring story of Discovering hope and healing in the midst of life's deepest valleys–all chronicled in his new book, I Still Believe. Jeremy will be back again tomorrow with more of his story and a giveaway of his new book.

***

I think one of my greatest desires for writing I Still Believe and having people read it would be to show that I'm just an ordinary person like you.

People say to me

"You must best a great man of faith to go through this."

Or they say,

"I don't know if I could handle that and continue to walk through proclaiming God's goodness."

When I hear these comments, I always tell people that first of all God will give you the same grace, ability and strength to walk through whatever He has laid before you because we all have the same Spirit. I'm not this great, awesome guy — well hopefully my wife thinks so — but I desire to grow more just like each of you.

For me this book was an amazing opportunity to share deeply about my story and in that process show you how the Lord has taken me from a life of faith with my childhood and observing how as a young child, God has instilled strength in my life to endure what I went through.

At a young age in California, I met the love of my life- her name was Melissa- she was an amazing woman. She loved Jesus more than anything else in this world. I quickly fell in love with her because of her heart for The Lord. I quickly told her, "Hey I think I'm in love with you." My quick proclamation of love caused the relationship to kind of go south a bit. It was a little too soon at the time to share my love for her, but I for sure knew she was the one. To make a long story short, we ended up getting engaged. However, before we got engaged, I found out that she had cancer, so we were walking through that at the time.

During her treatment she lost all of her hair, and I used to call her my beautiful, bald-haired, brown-eyed babe. She loved that. It was one of our little things we had together. I was so thankful that God prepared me for that time, but you can never really prepare fully for that type of thing yet I know God had prepared my heart in the beginning.

We were married and when we got back from our honeymoon, I remember us going to the doctor to have her re-tested to see how the progress was coming with the cancer treatment.  The doctor pulled me aside and he said, "Jeremy, it has come back. It has spread rapidly and there is nothing else we can do for Melissa." And I was like, "What do you mean? What's the next step?" He then shared that she had weeks to months to live.



Melissa & Jeremy, October 2000

This was the most devastating thing you could ever hear being 23 years old and your wife is 21 and you just got married. It was such a battle — having everybody in the world praying and really seeking The Lord. I remember one time Melissa asked me when she was very weak from the cancer – she said, "Jeremy, let's worship The Lord." And so I pulled my guitar out and here we are singing, I cry out for your hand of mercy to heal me, for You are good, for You are good, You are good to me.


This moment meant so much to me. In the midst of no matter what kind of hardship, what kind of trial, He is still good. We still cry out. We cried out until the day she went to be with The Lord.

I remember that day when she took her last breath. God spoke to my heart and said I want you to stand up and worship me. And I did. I stood up even though it was the hardest thing I ever did. I lifted my hands – at that point, I remember understanding obedience. Even in the midst of hardships. And understanding that no matter what we go through, He is worthy to be praised.

So, I hope you can see that no matter who you are, God will give you the grace and the strength to go through whatever trials you may be going through. And He loves you.

In 2 Corinthians 5:17,

He says- Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

We are a new creation so we can walk through those things together as the Holy Spirit has given us this time.

There is also a scripture in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 that says:

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

What He has in store for us is such a beautiful thing. I pray that you are encouraged, you're comforted and that others will come to know Christ as their personal Lord and Savior through my story. And I tell people, give it [the book] to someone that doesn't know Christ or someone that is going through a difficult time. And I pray that they come to know Christ through this.

That's my heart, that's my desire. So, I pray that God ministers to your soul through I Still Believe.

By Jeremy Camp


:Most of us perceive the peripheral as details of minor relevance or importance.  My opinion is changing.

pe·riph·er·al
of, relating to, or being the outer part of the field of vision.

The main focus of this photograph is what is in this image.  But you cannot imagine how it really was to be there because you cannot see the peripheral; dozens and dozens of hot air balloons, creating a feeling and image so spectacular and surreal, even a panoramic couldn't capture it.  They surrounded us....360 degrees.

It reminds me of my dad's house after he died.  Describing him as an accumulator of all things was an understatement.  The pictures I attempted to take of rooms and rooms literally filled to the ceiling did not and could not capture the immensity and enormity of what my brother and I had to face.  It is because you cannot see the peripheral in the photographs.  The feeling of being in all that stuff was overwhelming.  His death was overwhelming.  But in the picture, you could only see one small section.  The feeling was lost.

Daily and moment by moment, I see only a small part of a big picture in my life.  I meander through my day not noticing all His wondrous gifts.

Being thankful is changing my perspective and taking a film off of my eyes that I never knew was there.
In hindsight, I see a bigger viewpoint that reveals the work God was and is doing in my life.  At times, however, I am unable to see the peripheral.

Imagine your day if you went through it aware that you cannot always see the peripheral.
Or that you become aware that there is a peripheral to see.  Would you open you eyes wider?

Maybe we would move slower and notice more; not just look, but see; and not just hear but really listen.
Especially those times of adversity, growing pains, and times that seem obscure.  And sometimes, just to see the extraordinary in the ordinary.

And Jesus said to him, "What do you want me to do for you?" And the blind man said to him, "Rabbi, let me recover my sight."  Mark 10:51

I pray I recover my sight.  All of it.  Even the peripheral.

By Christina   AKA Homeschool Mom



angel:

[Judy Harder]

Loving a Wild One
Jan 31, 2012  Sarah Mae


"My daughter is so out-of-control...she's been like this right out of the womb! What do I do?!"

"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4

You have a wild one, a wild child you feel is out of control.

You're at your wits about what to do. You don't want her to become a wild out-of-control teenager, but discipline is not working, in fact, she laughs in the face of discipline. Oh friends, how I understand! I have a nearly 3 -year-old little spit-fire, beautiful, crazy girl, who I love desperately, but who drives me mad sometimes. Mad. As in crazy coo-coo. Just send me to the place with the white walls 'cause mama has lost it.

I mean, what do you do with a child like that? Well, I'll tell you what I'm learning.

You love them like mad.

More specifically, try these things (many of which were inspired by Sally Clarkson):

Tell your little one that they are a delight.

Sometimes with this one, the words have to come first. I was not delighting my darling Caroline, but I said the words to her, "you, Caroline, are a delight!" and in my head I would pray, "Oh Father, please make these words true." And He did.

Stop spanking

If spanking isn't working, or things keep getting worse, please don't keep spanking them. Spanking wasn't working for my sweet one, and my friend and mentor said to me, "I really think Caroline would obey you if she could." I took those words to heart...somehow my little one was not getting the message through physical discipline. So I stopped, and I started doing a few other things instead...

More time, kisses, and cuddles

I began spending more time, making more time, for my Care (Caroline). I started cuddling with her more, kissing her more, spending more time at bedtime, praying over her, singing to her and constantly giving her words of affirmation, "I love you Caroline, you are beautiful and smart and you are a delight! God loves you. I'm so glad you are my girl."

Show compassion

When Care hits, I take her hands in mine and I rub them on my face and I say, "hands are for love, not hurting." She knows this so well by now that I can ask her what hands are for and she says, "for loooooooove." When she yells or is unkind, I bend down to her and say, "let's use our words kindly; let's be gentle." I'm not saying not to discipline your babes, for Care a time-out or a small spoon of vinegar works well, but I am saying to be intentionally compassionate and gentle.

Remember who you are: a sinner and a saint

You, my friend, are not perfectly obedient. You and I, we mess up, we try, we fight, we are stubborn, we believe lies, and we sin. But we love God, and He loves us with a wild, unyielding grace. He is slow to anger and abounding in love, graciousness, compassion, and faithfulness. Remember who your children are, little ones with a sin nature, and yet made in the image of God. Train them up in love and discipline, with compassion, kindness, and grace, just as your Father does to you.

My friends, your wild one wants to please you, whether you believe it or not. But God tells us not to exasperate them, not to provoke by being to harsh with them. You can't exasperate a child into pleasing you (you can make a robot, but don't you want their heart?), they will just become more frustrated...or more discouraged. Go for their heart. It takes much, much more time to nurture the heart, but it's real. And it's how to love well.

My Caroline has changed.

Is she still spirited and a bit crazy? Oh yes. But she is much sweeter and more obedient than before. And you know what else?

I delight in her.



By Sarah Mae, Like a Warm Cup of Coffee

...

I Recommend:

Seasons of a Mother's Heart (and pretty much every book by Sally Clarkson)

Heartfelt Discipline: The Gentle Art of Training and Guiding Your Child (I believe this is coming back in print)



I Still Believe: What I've Learned The Last 10 years {and a giveaway}
Jan 31, 2012  Jeremy Camp




Jeremy," my friend said softly, "it's time."

I rose and walked back toward the other room, crying all the way.  I couldn't believe it, but I knew: The moment had arrived to say goodbye to my wife.

This was 10 years ago.  Ten years since I said goodbye to my wife Melissa who was dying of cancer.  I've received so many questions since I wrote my book I Still Believe. Many have asked why it took me 10 years to write a book after going through the loss of my first wife.  Why did it take so long? I asked myself that question as I was sitting down to write this book and talking to someone that helped me with my manuscript.  The words that came to my mind are process and timing.

You see I realized that all that God was teaching me was through this process. I looked back on 10 years and see that I have grown so much spiritually. A decade ago I wasn't ready to write the book, and I know it took all these years reach this point.  I always knew I was going to eventually write my story.  It was something that I knew God had to change my heart for me to be ready to share my story in a book. I was waiting for that time that I could look back and say God has taught me amazing things, beyond anything I could imagine. And it was just His timing...His perfect timing.

When I started writing I Still Believe, I wrote about what God has been doing now in my life and how I went through the loss and devastation of having to watch my wife suffer through cancer on her journey to go be with Jesus.  I also share how I've come full circle now into the point where I have a beautiful family. I have three children now. I have a beautiful wife, Adrienne and my two girls Isabella and Arianne.  In August, we welcomed our newborn son, Egan, who has just stolen my heart. They all have stolen my heart. It has been an amazing time, but I think a lot of our lessons in our life are really about God's timing

In my book, I share about something my friend Jon told me.

Jeremy, I know it doesn't make sense but that is a part of the bigger picture. Through the suffering God has a greater purpose. In heaven now, Melissa's reward is great. If we can look at things from an eternal perspective, we can see that her reward is so much greater than any earthly suffering.

The bigger picture: We all have stories to share and sometimes there are things God wants to do in our hearts, there is a process, and it is just timing for Him to teach us these lessons. There were so many things I had to learn first before I wrote my book.  I'm so grateful for the process and timing.

How is God teaching you about His perfect timing?

By Jeremy Camp


***

Leave a comment sharing how God is teaching you about his perfect timing to be entered to win one of 5 copies of I Still Believe plus Jeremy's latest CD, We Cry Out: The Worship Project.

We'll be announcing winners on Friday.

You can follow updates from Jeremy at his site,  find more information about I Still Believe here and read the first chapter of the book here.

[Judy Harder]

Churched: One Kid's Journey Toward God Despite a Holy Mess [Free Download]

Feb 01, 2012 Matthew Paul Turner

My name is Matthew, and while you're probably not familiar with me, you might know my bubbly, talented, beautiful wife, Jessica. While I admit that I rarely visit (in)courage and Bloom, I talk about it all the time. With my wife, of course. And I've sung the praises of (in)courage more than one might think. Why? Because the community and ministry that happens here at this blog is unique, valuable, and inspiring. It's like a church in some ways, a community of believers that encourage, pray, and inspire one another to live well. I know that's true for Jessica. All that said, thank you for what each of you bring to this community, for sharing your life's joys as well as your struggles, and for truly caring for one another.

A couple years ago I wrote Churched: One Kid's Journey Toward God Despite A Holy Mess. This book is funny, heartfelt, and very personal. Through a collection of stories, thoughts, and a few punch lines I share bits and pieces of how I met God.

Whenever somebody asks me for a short synopsis of my church upbringing, I usually say, "Well, I went to a church where my Sunday school teacher burned Barbie to explain hell."

That description, while certainly funny, also describes why I sort of had to survive my childhood church experiences and why faith and trust doesn't always come easy for me.While today, I can say that most of pastors's and teachers's intentions were good, the effects of fear, no matter what the intentions, have a longstanding impact on people. It took me a long time to understand that.

And no doubt, a part of me is still unpacking some of those fears today.

Churched is a humorous retelling of the stories that I've already unpacked, and though most readers certainly recognize the threads of pain and fear, most readers also laugh. And I love that. I believe there's hope and healing in laughter.

I'm pleased to offer the audio version of me reading Churched here on Bloom – for free. Just click here to download it.

I hope you enjoy the stories.

And, because I love hearing the stories of others: If you grew up in church, what's a strange or funny memory from your church experience?

May God bless and keep you.

Matthew Paul Turner


When You Need Friends {But Have A Hard Time Finding Them}

Feb 01, 2012  Kristen Strong

I'm out of breath from hurrying {though I'm still late} and forcing my stubborn side-by-side double stroller up the hill to the playgroup location, an indoor playground. I'm nervous, too, since I'm visiting for the first time. I heave the heavy door open and awkwardly bang the stroller against the frame a half a dozen times before making it through. Once inside and settled, I approach moms and chat as best I can while wrangling waggling toddlers. I finally realize this familiar, established sorority isn't interested in pursuing conversation with me beyond introductions.

A short while later, I find a local mom's group. Soon after joining, I volunteer to host a meeting in my home. I clean house, cook snacks, and wrestle kids. Then I wait as not. one. person shows up.

These and other friend discouragements found me thiiiis close to putting a sign in my yard saying, "Desperate woman seeks friends!" If there had been a way to do it without looking so, ya know, desperate I would have done it. After all, I had the poster board and markers.

The most frustrating part? I was willing to put effort into initiating friendships. So what's a girl to do when she's plumb tuckered from trying to make friends but knows she still needs them?

She keeps trying.

Because the only way to guarantee never making friends is never trying again. And if I want near and dear relationships, it's going to take here and now effort.

3 {not as sign-in-front-yard-desperate} things I did to make friends:

Show up. I regularly showed up at Barnes and Noble storytime, the park, and our church. Every Sunday, I would hang around church after the service, talking to other women. My husband would wink and say, "Ya know, baby, we don't have to close the place every Sunday." But fortunately he was sympathetic to my problem and saw the opportunity for what it was: a regular place to meet regular women. Church was a good place to find – like the Nester wisely says – an automatic bench. By staying and talking with women there, I eventually formed friendships with some of them.

Open up. As in, my house. You now know people didn't always come, but usually they did. Sometimes for lunch, sometimes for dinner. Some of them we didn't know well beforehand {at first}, but that was okay. The point of having them over for dinner was to get to know them. Besides, everyone likes to eat! {And remember, you can always give this a go!}

Lift up. I would tell God my friendship frustrations, and I didn't always use my sweet Sunday school voice, either. Since none of my problems surprise Him, I knew I could be honest, whiney voice and all. God's heart was for me to have community, and I was not the exception to the rule {neither are you}. I lifted up my friendship anxieties to Him because He cares.

God's grace rained down on my friendship dry spell, and through that grace I learned valuable lessons in the waiting. It wasn't easy, but it was worth it. Sometimes the harder we fight for something, the sweeter the success.

If today finds you in a friendship dry spell, it's not that you don't have friends. It's that you don't have friends yet. The Author and Perfecter of your faith loves you wildly. We give our burdens to Him and receive His rhythms of grace, His just-right timing for all good things.

What do you do when you're tired from trying to make friends? What have you learned in your own friendship dry spells?

Kristen Strong, Chasing Blue Skies




Embedded

Randi Helm




This has been a long few years for me.  Like so many, I've been in the throws of dire situations with seemingly no way out.  I sometimes look back and think, wow, I can't believe what I've been through, and am still going through.

Pulling the curtain back on my life I get the clear impression that I am embedded.  I am nestled right in between a rock and a hard place with little to no wiggle room.  This season has formed around my soul and engulfed me.

Softly I hear the voice of my Heavenly Father speak,

"The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." (Exodus 14:14 NIV)

But in order to hear Him I have had to be quiet and I am not often quiet when I struggle.

When difficult things happen I think it is so natural to fight, kick, fuss and try to change things.  When you put your hand in the flame you the pain makes you instinctively pull it back out. I am a fixer by nature.  I'm always trying to problem solve and I have not had much success with all the complicated and unresolved problems that loom over me.  The frustration that things haven't changed is the most difficult for me.

But there is something that is beginning to change.  It's me.  At times feel like a child who is held tight during a full blown tantrum. Finally, I am beginning to rest out of pure exhaustion in the arms of my loving Father.  I have no energy to fight, fuss or even pray for that matter if I'm being honest.  In this emerging moment of my life I really begin to grasp that the Lord understands.  I have to face my weakness in order to embrace His sufficiency.

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans." (Romans 8:26 NIV)

When He tells me to be still, He means it. It is for my own good.  In being still the Spirit of God goes before the Father on my behalf to pray for me.  It's in this act of surrender that heaven touches my soul and I get a sense that there is more to what I'm going through than meets my eye and I begin to wonder.

Perhaps becoming embedded has freed me in a way I had never thought of before.  Oh don't get me wrong, I so feel like a prisoner at times but I'm finding freedom in ways I had not expected.  Being imbedded forces me to discover the promises of God.  I will either be swallowed up by fear, anger and doubt or choose a different path. The power of God is at work here.  Only the Lord could make me have a desire to rest in His promises.  Left to myself, I would lose the battle with fear.

Once again, I softly hear the voice of my Heavenly Father whisper the words King David wrote,

"Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you."  (Psalm 9:10 NIV)

I would not need to hear these words if I weren't embedded. I could not know the realities found in this promise if I hadn't been here.

by Randi Helm

[Judy Harder]

To see this picture go to (IN)Courage at www.incourage.me
and you will see it. Sorry, still do not know how to post the pictures here. Someday. This is a pretty project for the handy to do. Kids will enjoy it too. jh


He First Loved Us
Feb 02, 2012  Jennifer

I thought it would be fun to share with you a sweet little heart garland project. Perfect for February. What better time to create a project that reminds us of God's love. Oh, how He loves us. Through our faults and joys and mistakes and sorrows.

I want the reminder. I need the reminder. No matter what happens in this world... He loves me. I have His consistent love. His love for me has taught me to love. I can love with same beautiful, unconditional love.

We love because He first loved us. 1 John 4:19

The love we receive from God allows us to return that love and to spread that love to others. True love originates in God.

So let's get started!


First you need paper. Any kind of paper will work. I wanted to use a paper that had color on both sides since you will be able to see both sides when the project is finished. I didn't have any double sided paper, so I simply made my own.

I used just plain 8 ½" x 11" white card stock and brought out my watercolor paints.



I painted both sides and let them dry overnight. I did weight mine down so the paper would not wrinkle, which it will do a little bit as it dries.



Next, I cut each sheet into 1" strips. That gives me 11 strips from each piece of paper. If you want larger hearts, you can cut longer strips.

Each heart will take 6 strips of paper plus a center strip. Leave 2 strips the full length. Cut 1 ½" from 2 strips and 3" from 2 strips. (For the center strips, I cut some full length strips in half. You will see where this is used a bit later.)



I wanted to put my reminder of  God's love right on the hearts. We love because He first loved us. I added white paint to the watercolor and used vintage letter stamps to stamp out the verse. You can use stamps to do this, letter stickers, or write it with your own handwriting! You can also use ink instead of paint.



Stamp your words on the longest strips.



Now you can lay out each heart. Start with one of your center strips. Put one long strip on either side, then a middle size strip on either side, and then a smaller strip on either side.



Stack them up in this same order. If you made any words, make sure they are facing in towards the center strip. That way when you get to the next step, they will bend to be seen on the outside.



Now, if you want to, you can secure these together. You could staple or clip them together while you do the next step. Or, like I did, have your husband step in and give you an extra hand. I decided to use decorative brads, so I did not staple anything.



I put my brad through, starting with one of the longest strips, then through the middle strip and then the smaller strip.



Next, push the brad through all the strips at the bottom. (If you stapled the bottom in the beginning, I would bring both sides of the heart down and then staple.)



Bring the other strips down and secure the brad.



Now do this process over and over and over for as many hearts as you want on your garland.



Punch a hole in the top of your center strip to hang. I strung my hearts up on a simple piece of twine.





I love to walk by and read the beautiful truth, "We love because He first loved us."

I hope this simple heart garland will inspire you to create something to remind you of God's love this February. If you have any questions, be sure to ask in the comments and I will answer them.

By Jennifer, StudioJRU

[Judy Harder]

Those That Know Their God...
Feb 03, 2012  April Motl


The people who know their God will be strong and carry out great exploits. Daniel 11:32b NKJ

What does a really "great exploit" look like to you? What image does the word "strong" conjure up in your mind?  For me, the definition of these words varies from day to day.  On those bone-dry-so-tired-I-can-hardly-stand days I think a really great exploit consists of facing down yet another load of laundry, dishes and a grocery list.  Yet there are other mornings my feet hit the floor and I am ready to take on anything!  Perhaps you're the same way.  Sometimes being strong is having the strength just to keep functioning, other times it consists of Herculean feats.

The Lord penned this verse through His servant Daniel. Interestingly, that was the Lord's message for His people during a time of bondage and captivity.  Is this a day full of Herculean strength or a just-help-me-keep-going day?  For Israel, it was a number of just-help-me-keep-going years!  They were in captivity.

Is there anything holding you captive today? Guilt?  A broken relationship?  A bad habit?  Bitterness?  Whatever it might be, the Lord still says to you, "know Me and you will be strong and carry out great exploits."

Some years back when I was in desperate need of some strength injected into my life, I bemoaned my out of control schedule and circumstances to a friend and sister in the Lord.  Her quick reply to my wailing was, "what attribute of the Lord are you forgetting?"  Excuse me?  Hello?  I was telling you about the finances, the schedule, my dying loved one!  She repeated her question and she was right.  Embarrassingly enough, I have this tendency to forget that God IS God and that means He is the One in control- maybe you do too!  And when I remembered that He was still sitting on His throne, sovereignly sifting the events of my life through His loving hands I could rest and even thrive despite the circumstances.

Those who know their God....  The key to having the strength to carry out those great exploits of life from laundry to touching eternity lies in knowing God. That word know is yada, the same Hebrew word describing the act of intercourse.  This is not a casual, brief once a week, small talk kind of relationship.  It is an intimate, sacred one.  Does this describe your relationship with God?  Or do you have a once a week, small talk kind of relationship with God?

Some people compartmentalize life.  One situation goes in the business file, another in the family file and so on.  If your relationship with God has been compartmentalized and consists of just putting in your time once a week on Sunday morning, there is something you should know: God doesn't fit in a file! He doesn't fill an hour and a half on your scheduler.  If He seems distant, maybe it is because you are holding Him at a distance.  Seek to yada Him and see the great explosion of exploits He works in your life.

By April Motl – Motl Ministries


The Power that Lives Within Us
Feb 03, 2012 Dawn Camp




Sometimes we know we need to change, but it's hard to find the strength, the resolve. Maybe it's a bad habit or addiction that we just can't seem to kick, or a good habit that we need to start. Unfortunately, if you're like me you may tend to rely on yourself instead of Him.

I saw The Story Tour in Atlanta recently and Max Lucado was one of the hosts. At one point he spoke eloquently about our weakness and the Lord's strength. His words went something like this:

You may have a problem with alcoholism, but Jesus Christ doesn't, and he lives inside of you. You may have a problem with anger, but Jesus Christ doesn't, and he lives inside of you.

"You may have a problem with ______________, but Jesus Christ doesn't, and he lives inside of you."

I think we all have a thing or two we could use to fill in that blank. Goodness knows I do.

A couple of weeks later I heard the following verse and recalled Max Lucado's words, and the two tied together beautifully in my mind: this incredible power of Christ living within us.

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me:
and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God,
who loved me, and gave himself for me. ~Galatians 2:20

It's when I reach that low point—the "I don't know what I'm doing or how I'll get through this. Please help me" moment—that relief flows even before I see God's mercy in action. Blessings are found just in the letting go and acknowledging His control.

{I imagine God smiling down at this point and thinking, "Finally. She gets it."}

The Lord says, "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9) How can I glorify God if I rely on my own strength? I can't.

The power of Jesus Christ works through our weakness.

What about you? Do you have something that you need to let go of and hand over to Him? Remember, you may struggle with sin, but Jesus Christ doesn't, and he lives inside of you.

[Judy Harder]

The End of Darkness
Feb 04, 2012

Heather Gemmen Wilson


The Superbowl is coming to Indy, and every Hoosier wants to get involved (even though our beloved Colts aren't playing—no comment, please. More than six months ago, our church in Fishers, Indiana (a suburb of Indianapolis) tried to find out how we could serve, but no more volunteers were being accepted by the Superbowl committee—I think they already had 13,000 signed up. (Can you imagine turning away volunteers? It reminds me of that scripture passage where the Israelite leaders had to tell people to quit bringing gifts because they had too much.) And no wonder they are having such an overwhelming response. This nationwide event is an exciting thing to be a part of! I mean, even when I didn't know what a first down was, I was hosting Superbowl parties in my home. For one day a year, we all come together to be a part of something bigger than ourselves.

The cool thing is that volunteers are not just standing on the side of the road with a big blue hand pointing the way to the stadium. They are taking advantage of the hype to make positive changes in the city and around the nation—from environmental initiatives, to supporting tissue banks to promote the cure for cancer, to renovating youth centers, to encouraging student achievement, to enhancing the arts, to delivering gifts to hospitalized children—and so much more.

Sadly, folks with good intentions are not the only ones taking advantage of the hype. The attorney general recently warned law enforcement officers of the darker side of this world-wide event:

"Greg Zoeller says there will be an increase in demand for the illegal commercial sex trade in connection with the Super Bowl and, he says, we ought to expect that some of sex workers who come here are the victims of human trafficking."*

Officers and taxi-drivers and volunteers are being trained to identify trafficking victims and to know how to respond. Anti-trafficking organizations are praying fervently and ramping up accessibility to shelters for sex workers trying to escape from their en-slavers.

I'm thankful our leaders and grassroot organizations are dealing with this issue head on, but it's dreadful to think we even have to. How could people be so evil that they would abuse other human beings in such profound and humiliating ways? It's hard to comprehend.

I wonder, sometimes, how God bears it. When he looks down at his inheritance, his beloved children, and sees the wickedness that has overcome us, how is it possible that he doesn't avert his eyes, doesn't abandon us altogether? Oh, how I praise him for his mercy and his faithful love!

Someday the Lord will return, and that world-wide event that brings all people together on bended knee will not be tainted by ugly deeds. On that day, goodness will be released to its full degree and beauty will be our only concern. Come soon, Lord Jesus!

[Judy Harder]

Celebrate

Deidra

In college, I went to a church where the women wore amazingly beautiful hats and the men wore pocket squares that matched their ties. The choir processed down the aisle every Sunday morning – heads thrown back, steps matched, voices strong and joyful. They sang "I'm glad to be in the service one more time," and no one could stay in their seats when they sang it. It was a celebration. A community gathered – all in one place, with one thing on their minds: telling God "thank you" for getting us through another week.

We clapped our hands and sang together, and some people lifted open hands up to the air – a gesture that seemed to whisper, "Here, God. Take it. It's too big for me, but I know You can handle it. I NEED You to handle it." We'd sing out, and the Hammond organ would punctuate our songs with high-pitched runs, or driving low notes rising from the pedals below. The choir would make their way to the choir stand and they would rock the house. And there was dancing and there was praising and there was freedom everywhere I looked.

When the preacher preached, he stood tall and wore a black robe and stretched out his arms to place both palms flat on the pulpit. He always started with the bible, and the people who sat in the pews turned pages of their own and it sounded like the flutter of wings. His voice was low and strong and he unpacked those words on thin pages so they seemed to dance in the air and we knew God could see us. We knew it and believed it, and it was real and true.

At the end of the service, we'd all stand, and we'd join hands across the aisle. And if you were sitting on the end of an aisle near the window, you'd reach behind you or in front of you to hold the hand of the person in the next row. Everyone connected to each other. No one left out. Together we would sing, "Praise God, from whom all blessings flow," and it was percussive and the drums spurred us on. And when we finished, the pastor would pronounce the benediction and the last word was always, "Peace."

Deidra @ Jumping Tandem