Newbrassky

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The not so little house on The Ranch with No Name along the Dismal was imported by Delmonico who made a fortune off a diamond mine someplace. He, Slim, and Trinity made their north from someplace, driving along cattle and finally settling there. Slim has a map someplace. Trinity got waylaid (pun intended) by a wagonload of ladies of ill repute and didn't come back until later. They lived in a dugout for a while before they ordered the house with Del's coil oil computer. Del's friends and protectors, the Bohunks, supplied the labor. The Frumpy Fairy Godmother showed up somewhere along the line and somehow just adopted the whole bunch of them. She lives in the house's cupola, but says she doesn't really live there because it wouldn't be "seemly" for her to be living with so many men.

Slim built a chicken coop. He goes home to Wissyconsin every weekend to spend time with his wife and 23 children. Every once in a while, strange men in flying plates come and take him away. It is suspected they've "probed" him. Gopher Grease, who also has a room in the house but comes and goes a lot, supplied the anti-flying-plate gun, which is a big hawking beast, but they never seem to be able to hit the plates. The aliens got tired of Slim and came and got Delmonico a few times, for a week or more at a time. He recently returned from one of those adventures. When Slim comes back, he brings cheeeeeeese. When Del gets back, he brings soda water to make people poop.

Stoney Pete was once a bounty hunter, but when he found the not so little house along the Dismal, he decided to give up the life and stay. He built the pig pen and tends to the pigs. His somewhat partner in the business was a man who never gave his real name, but his holsters were marked with ST. It is suspected he haunts the house, but no one is sure.

Along with the stable is a shed made from canned potted meat. It is Trinity's creation, along with a glittering sculpture that was supposed to be a greenhouse, and a... bunktraption behind the house and near the pigpen that was supposed to be the bohunkhouse. The bohunkhouse was built by Litl' Rooster, another waif who showed up and found he was home. He spends much of his time tending the cattle. Trinity's primary occupation is occupying the hammock and swigging from his jug of "recipe." He has stills hidden in numerous places, but used the silver solder for them to decorate his saddle. The still's seams are made of lead, which could help to describe some of the behaviour of the occupants of the house.

The house also has several pets in residence. Duke is the yellow dog who found them along the trail and stayed. He's mostly Delmonico's companion, but goes hunting with Slim. Claire, the chocolate lab, is somewhat loyal to Trinity. Daisy, Duke's companion, just hangs out around the house, mooching. Then there is the Frankenbird, the bird with the turkey's head attached to a chicken, or maybe it was another bird, but Delmonico made it. Frankenbird is Trinity's best friend, outside of the wagon ladies. Sheep is one of Trinity's drinking buddies. The Cat belongs to no one and things it all belongs to him.

They often have visitors who come and go. Most recently was a man called Major who lived in the curtains before he left. The Frumpy Fairy Godmother liked him a lot. Handtub has a firetruck in the barn. Even more recently were two men who ate soap. They looked enough alike to be brothers.

Currently, Litl' Rooster is tracking one of the brothers, Slim is in Wissyconsin, and the rest are ambling about the area.

((Authors talk/ write within parenthesis or <> or {}. Most of the characters of the story can't hear the authors. Slim can, and sometimes it seems Del can. The Frumpy Fairy Godmother, even with her magic wand, is oblivious to it. She thinks she's real.   Welcome to .... Newbrassky. If I got the facts of this production of the Bozos on the Bus confused, misplaced, or in error... tough. Go back and read it for yourself!    AnnieLee))

[Derby Younger]

Fetid hears a voice in his head, not an unusual occurrence. Sounds like Cousin Derby, somethin' about a Fairy Godmother and a black coated man with a name like a steak. He moves to the edge of the cover, looks out and realizes it ain't a town but some strange rock formation. The voices and the rock apparition are bizarre even by his standards. He decides to break camp, ride off a distance and think on this. For Fetid, this could take awhile.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

As Fetid rides off, the sky is suddenly darkened by the appearance of a flying plate over his head. A bright blue light shines down and envelopes him for a moment, then stops, leaving him with a tingling sensation. When he looks back, the plate is gone.

[Delmonico]

<Authors note, no rock formations here.   Just sand dunes covered in grass and often no trees for miles even today.  It is a beeuuutiful land that drives those used to treas and such down right crazy.>



http://websearch.cs.com/wm/boomframe.jsp?query=Nebraska+Sandhills&page=1&offset=1&result_url=redir%3Fsrc%3Dwebsearch%26requestId%3D524503003303a5e3%26clickedItemRank%3D1%26userQuery%3DNebraska%2BSandhills%26clickedItemURN%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.hprcc.unl.edu%252Fnebraska%252Fnebraska-sandhills-aug2001.html%26invocationType%3D-%26fromPage%3Dwmthomepage%26amp%3BampTest%3D1&remove_url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hprcc.unl.edu%2Fnebraska%2Fnebraska-sandhills-aug2001.html

I hope that is right, I ain't that good at pewters.

[Delmonico]

There ain't that beutiful and there ain't no durned trees to block the view.

[Trinity]

As Fetid rides off, the sky is suddenly darkened by the appearance of a flying plate over his head. A bright blue light shines down and envelopes him for a moment, then stops, leaving him with a tingling sensation. When he looks back, the plate is gone.

...but his hat is gone and he has a perfectly round bare spot on the top of his head.

[Trinity]

<Authors note, no rock formations here.   Just sand dunes covered in grass and often no trees for miles even today.  It is a beeuuutiful land that drives those used to treas and such down right crazy.>



http://websearch.cs.com/wm/boomframe.jsp?query=Nebraska+Sandhills&page=1&offset=1&result_url=redir%3Fsrc%3Dwebsearch%26requestId%3D524503003303a5e3%26clickedItemRank%3D1%26userQuery%3DNebraska%2BSandhills%26clickedItemURN%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.hprcc.unl.edu%252Fnebraska%252Fnebraska-sandhills-aug2001.html%26invocationType%3D-%26fromPage%3Dwmthomepage%26amp%3BampTest%3D1&remove_url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hprcc.unl.edu%2Fnebraska%2Fnebraska-sandhills-aug2001.html

I hope that is right, I ain't that good at pewters.

Happy cheese comes from happy cows! 

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

And happy Duke likes happy cheese.



((Oh yeah, other notable visitors have included Brazos Bucky Smith (anyone seen him, lately? I hope he is ok), Russ T. Chambers, and Foothills Drifter.))

[Delmonico]

Them be Black Angus, one of the more popular breeds for beef, as in steaks, roast and hamburger.  They not be the best fer milkin'.

Sides that the Sandhills is cowboy country, they don't like ta milk cows.

BTW. The Unoffical State Tree in Newbrassky is the windmill.

[Delmonico]

Delmonico is having a dream about Trinity with a bucket out trying to milk a black Angus steer.

Suddenly he is awaken by a noise, going out to the porch he sees nothing but a blue light off in the distance.   Knowning the flying plate people are tired of him, Delmonico goes back into the house a bit hungry.  He looks around for something, but just dosn't find anything that sounds good. 

He knows what he wants, but he'll have to wait till morning and make a trip to Dunning and see if they happen to have what he wants at the grocery store this week.

Sadly craving something a bit different he heads back to his office, Duke is awake and is looking ant the Phono-graph and is nosing around a cardboard tube with a wax cylinder inside.

Delmonico looks at the title on the end of the tube and smiles, he puts it on and cranks it ou, out of the cone comes:

Yes we have no bananas, we have no bananas today.   

Duke wags his tail and joins in.

[Derby Younger]

The blue light was gone, his hat with it. Fetid bought a hand up to scratch his head in confusion and found a round bald spot. Musta been Arapaho's, he figured. He kept riding east along the water until another river joined from the North. Higher ground to his right was better to his liking.

[Trinity]

And happy Duke likes happy cheese.



((Oh yeah, other notable visitors have included Brazos Bucky Smith (anyone seen him, lately? I hope he is ok), Russ T. Chambers, and Foothills Drifter.))

But duke makes everybody around unahappy after having eaten happy cheese!  Peeeeeyewww! 

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

But Claire likes it. She thinks it is Eau d'Happyduke.

[Delmonico]

Delmonico decides to make biscuits and gravy fer supper tonight.  As the biscuits are browning, he sorts through the cylinders fer his phony-graph to see what tunes Duke would like.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The Frumpy Fairy Godmother simply *appears* behind Delmonico.

"What are you doing, and what are those?"

[Delmonico]

Wax siilly-enders fer my fony-graph, the needle goes in the gooves and vibrates, this causes the muuuusic that Duke likes to sing to.

[Trinity]

Trinity steps up to hear the explanation.  "Pssst.  Miss FFG, bein' outta wax, thems kin mailt easy... git mah drift?  Got anythin' in yer magical stick that kin... hailp us sleep? "

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The Frumpy Fairy Godmother nods to Trinity and glares at Delmonico.

"If you play those things between ten at night and eight," she looks to Trinity and corrects herself, "no, nine in the morning, I'm going to melt them. Understand?"

[litl rooster]

litl' rooster has enjoyed his time away from all the fony graf ic music while keeping an eye on the shorter Scatter Thumbs.. Ut's been tiring watching him  stop and eat every few minutes and my
horse may has well go on back to the barn, with out me...Scatter thumbs walks so slow even an ole cripply up fella like me can keep up. He is a prolific eater


I am concerned that Duke was just trying to help and move all my replacement heifers to the stock tank while I am gone,  and he his not chasing them like his wild ancestors did. If he was really a smart dog he would check the windmill and make sure it's operating properly

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

As much as Duke likes to sing along with the music, he has his duties. He takes off at a run.