Newbrassky

[Russ T Chambers]

Russ T. rides through on his way to Wisconsin for the Holidays in the company of a band of traveling musicians known as the OK Chorale.   Saying hey!  to the Frumpy Fairy Godmother the group moves quickly on!!   

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

<AnnieLee wants some good old brown yard eggs, but she won't be getting any, so she pouts>

I gots some.

MOM!!! Cousin Slim's being mean to me again!!!

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The Frumpy Fairy Godmother seems to be unfazed by the Choraleers, but as Russ T. rides away, his horse suddenly becomes a slug.


AnnieLee

[Delmonico]

Well folks I'm off to the land of Carharts and Wolverines, won't be back to the ranch till 6 and not the bunkhouse till at least 8:30.  I put a present in yer saddlebags fer the ride home Slim, but no peekin' till yer half way home.

Have some MORE coleslaw, ya must like it ya already ate 3 bowels of it.  Woops I meant bowls.

[Silver Creek Slim]

Well folks I'm off to the land of Carharts and Wolverines, won't be back to the ranch till 6 and not the bunkhouse till at least 8:30.  I put a present in yer saddlebags fer the ride home Slim, but no peekin' till yer half way home.

Have some MORE coleslaw, ya must like it ya already ate 3 bowels of it.  Woops I meant bowls.

Are ya putting Castor oil in the food again?

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

Duke, having eaten a large portion of the cole slaw, looks very distressed.

[Silver Creek Slim]

Duke, having eaten a large portion of the cole slaw, looks very distressed.

Uh oh!

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

Whimpering, Duke just can't get away fast enough and just lets loose all over Delmonico's soogun.

Poor Duke!

[Delmonico]

Slim gets half way home and looks in his saddle bags, there is a Sears and Roebuck Catalog.

[Delmonico]

Bout 10 miles from home Slim has horrible cramps and he kows it is castor oil cramps cause he's seen Monty Walsh.  Grabbin' his catalog he heads into the bushes.

As he's readin' the gun ads he hears a noise that sounds like two cocanuts bein' banged together.  The noise in the bushes has scared his horse and it has run off and left him alone.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

Meanwhile, Poor Duke tries to get off Delmonico's soogun, but each time, his stomach starts quivering and he goes some more.

[Delmonico]

Slim's horse makes a lot of noise when it comes into the yard.  Mrs. Slim sees the riderless horse come into the yard and goes out to see what is goin' on.  Leadin' the horse into the barn she lights a lantern and checks the saddle for blood.  She is feared that someone has shot him out of the saddle.  The poor lady finds not blood on the saddle, but cabbage, lots and lots of shredded cabbage.

Mean while Slim is back in the bushes makin' like the Energizer Bunny, he keeps goin' and goin',

Back at the ranch Delmonico gets out his spare soogun and heads off to the dugout and goes to bed.  Before goin' to sleep he says, "I hope Slim washes his hands before he buys those oranges.

[Silver Creek Slim]

"Delmonico is evil." 

[Delmonico]

Back at the ranch in the dugout, Delmonico's sleep is distirbed by a bad dream.  His dream is that Slim has gotten home and logged in and is showin' his wife how evil a Cowboy cook can be.   The dream gets better though when Slim's wife whacks him upside the head and tells him he should know better than to mess with the cyber cook one the cyber ranch.

Course she makes him sleep in the barn cause she don't want cabbage on he nice clean sheets.

[Delmonico]

Even if it is only cyber cabbage.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

There is a small payback, though, as the cyber dugout is filled with the cyber scent of cyber cabbage gas from a cyber dog.



AnnieLee

[Delmonico]

Delmonico just cover his head with a 6 point Hudson Bay blanket 'cause wool blankets filter out flatulance.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

(whisper mode on> Okie, that one made AnnieLee laugh out loud. <whisper mode off )

[Delmonico]

Delmonico gets up and goes to his stash of old time remidies that cooks are sometimes know to carry.  We all know what castor oil will start, well now sumthin' is needed to stop it on the poor dog.

Delmonico digs out a bottle or real (not flavored) blackberry brandy and give Duke a shot of it.  (True blackberry juice, wine or brandy will cure diarria.)  After that Duke just sits in the sun and smiles.  Delmonico burries the soiled soogun and opens the door to the dugout to air it out.

He thinks, it's only a week before Christmas, he's been so evil that more than likely he's only gonna get coal for Christmas.  Will he repent in time to redeem himself with less than a week to go?

[Delmonico]

What a choice, be evil and get coal for Christmas, or haul wood fer miles and pick up dried cow poop fer fuel.  Makes no sense to be good under the circumstances.      Being bad is the way to go.