Newbrassky

[Silver Creek Slim]

<shakes head> 

[Trinity]

"She could always re-dye-rect the excrement tube to the garden?"

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The Frumpy Fairy Godmother can't read minds, but if she could, she'd tell Delmonico the loam was for her garden at home, not the one in Newbrassky.

[Trinity]

"Wait... you said 'sculpting'?" Trinity's accent sometimes throws off the Frumpy Fairy Godmother and it takes a bit for the word to sink in.
"No, I was gathering up the rotting leaves that had mixed with the clay and soil. It makes for a fertile soil for a garden."

She leans to give Trinity a chaste kiss on his cheek. "Sleep well!"

Trinity blushes, looks down and turns his toes on the floor and thanks the FFg for the kiss.  Then begins to apologize: "AH shore am sorry fer mah post which has caused the confusion.  Apparently mah fangers din't eee-nunciate themselves an plum fergot ta include the letter "L" in "scuLptin".    Ah ain' no bad speller, mind you."

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The Frumpy Fairy Godmother grins, thinking about how cute Trinity looks as he is digging his toes and explaining. Then her face turns red at her unladylike thoughts.
"Uh, you are fine, Trinity, I think you talk just uh.. fine. Maybe we can go out tomorrow and gather up some cow stuff for the garden here?"

[Trinity]

"That'd suit me right nicely, Miss FFg.  Mebbe Ah'll fahnd me another rang!  .  ...say, is ever'thin' OK, why is ya turnin' raid??"

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

"Everything is just uh... spiffy! I just have really good blood circulation."

She takes a step to the side in case a lightning bolt is heading her way for such a fib.

[Delmonico]

Suddenly there is some noise in the kitchen, Delmonico is pourin' sourdough starter into a bowl.  He lovingly feeds it and puts the jar back in the cupboard.      He then adds some brown sugar and enough white flour to make a thick batter.   This of couse will bubble and make the kitchen smell like something fer Trinity to put in his still.

Delmonico then goes to the cupboard and checks supplies, he realizes he only has enough caraway seed and rye flour to make this batch.

He then goes into a rant, "Durn it now i got to run clear accross town to a store that hopefully has steel ground rye flour, It ain't right to use stone ground rye flour in ma Czech style rye bread, durn it why does everyone keep only stone ground rye flour, but the "Stone Ground" yuppies don't even bake much rye bread and if they do they just buy those packets and add water and pour it into there durn bread machines and then they try to tell you it is homemade bread when they didn't even get dough on their fingers kneadin' the bread, but instead let the durn electric machine do all the work for them and then take the credit fer it and if they do make sourdough their starters are so wimpy that they gots to add store bought yeast to it to make it rise and that ain't right either, but they'll use a little of their wimpy starter and then they have so much of it they'll be forcin' others around their cubical to take the little plastic bag of it home with instrucions printed on a 3X5 card and they'll call it Amish Friendship bread when the Amish all know how to start and use a starter with out makin' their friends all hate them by forcin' them to take home a durned plastic bag of starter that is so wimpy you can't raise bread with it if you gave it Viagra."

"And then I could go on about how most stores charge 5 times more for their brand of caraway seed when others are cheap, but I won't."

[Trinity]

"Delmonico!  Calm down... Here, have some Esssssppreeesssooo, it should calm yer nerves!"  Trinity quietly puts the baggie and the 3x5 card that an associate had given him in a drawer and decides not to ask Delmonico to make the bread for him.

[Delmonico]

Delmonico comes out of the kitchen that smells so wonderful with the smell of fresh baked Czech style sourdough rye bread.  This over powers the kitchen, but in the back ground is the smell of a turkey roastin' very slow and the faint oder of the deer loin that Delmonico cooked all day slow with some fresh ground red pepper and some cumin and onions.  The blend of 12 types of red peppers blended well as the meat fell aboart and was put on some white corn torrtillas with a blend of grated cheeses with funny Spanish soundin' names.

And yes it was good and the turkey on rye samwhiches that I'm gonna eat next week will be also.   My 3 pints of pepper sauce I am making ought to be ready next week also, 12 kinds of ground and sifted peppers, covered with hot vinegar and some kosher salt added, let steeep a few days and run through blender.

[gophergrease]

If you was in the south they mite make you a Genaral for have a blend of 12 herbs and spices. They made that other guy a Colonel, and he only has 11.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

(I'd ask you to send me some of that pepper stuff, Del, but Homeland Security might decide it is explosive. I think they thought the jam I was sending to Forty was some kind of plastique or gel, that's why he never got it. )

[Delmonico]

The sad thing is that as hot as it is, if it broke open in the belly of a plane they would not know what it was and they would have Haz/Mat and everyone else in on it.  Would look kinda cool though, pictures of someone cleanin' up my hot sauce in a space suit.   The UPS person was a different one yesterday, he choked when I opened the kitchen door.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

When the Frumpy Fairy Godmother comes downstairs, her sinuses are suprisingly clear, though her eyes are a little red. She's in her "working" skirt and blouse and wearing her brogans.

"Has anyone seen my gardening gloves?"

[Silver Creek Slim]

"What did your gloves look like?"

[Delmonico]

Each one has 4 fingers and a thumb.   Looks kinda like a cow udder with an extra teat.

[Silver Creek Slim]

"Oh! I say a pair of dem in the barn."

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

The Frumpy Fairy Godmother throws one of those "looks" at Delmonico, then gives a big smile to Slim.

"Thank you, I'll look there."

[Silver Creek Slim]

"Yer welcome, ma'am."

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

She isn't at the barn very long before she comes back, leaving a small shovel and her gloves in the wheelbarrow. She takes off her shoes and comes back in the house in her stocking feet.
"I forgot my hat!"

She hums as she slips upstairs.