The MALL

[Forty Rod]

Wife and I went to Montclare Plaza today.  I seldom go to a mall, but her cell phone contract was up so we went to Verizon, bought drapes at Sears, and ordered a couple of new batteries for my camera.  I had the greatest urge to buy a bullhorn at Radio Shack, go up on the top level of the mall, and make an announcement:

"Dear mall shoppers.  In order to serve you better, we at Montclare Plaza wish to ask your help.  Please take a moment to look around at the other shoppers near you, then pull your da---- head out of your a-- and realize you are not the sole occupant of this planet.  We thank you for your cooperration.   Have a nice day."

My wife says that's antisocial and won't let me do it.

[Joyce (AnnieLee)]

Aye, it could be considered anti-social, but I bet if you put a hat at your feet while you did it, some passersby might drop coins in it...

Not because they understand and appreciate what you are saying but because they think you are entertainment.



AnnieLee, not a mall shopper.

[Delmonico]

take yer own bull horn, the Radio Shack guy might not know what you want.   My last trip to Rdio shack, many years ago was for a cable hook up plug to replace one that was damaged on a TV.

I explained to the kid at said place I wanted a "Male" connector for a TV cable, he said "what do you mean a male plug?"  Well as we headed to the counter with my plug the kid was red faced and knew all about male and female parts and how the parts worked, TV plugs or mammals.

Well as we went by the back room,  right there by the plugs, the store manager and the UPS guy were almost rollin' on the floor laughin'. 

BTW there is a new NAPA store in our strip mall at work.  They had a Grand Opening today and had the OCC  NAPA bike there.  I saw three moons walkin' to my car at break, all guys lookin' at the bike.   Of the 2-300  there lookin' at it, only one rode up on a bike, but they all came into our store.  I don't mind good ol' scooter trash, but I don't like wanne be scooter trash.

[Marshal harpoluke]

 

Da last time Ah used da mawle, split up a couple of cords of firewood.

Still have a sore back, that was forty years ago.

[El Peludo]

Problem is you went on Sunday, Mr. Rod.    It don't make the folks in there any less agravatin', if you go on Tuesday through Thursday, but there are less of them to cause you angst, 'specially if you go in the morning, first thing. 

[Four-Eyed Buck]

Forty, have any luck finding a waffle iron?......Buck

[litl rooster]

ifn' all he need is a waffle iron...heck that's a no brainer...Go to A Waffel House, they don't use them, some disgruntle dish washer would pack it out yer buggy fer a couple bucks. 

[Forty Rod]

Found one on the wire that looks good, but the luck I've had........?

I want to see it first (and that ain't no dang guarantee, either.)

Goint to Williams Sonoma (another damned mall trip) Wednesday.

[Four-Eyed Buck]

I haven't been in a maul in about two years. Hate the dam things....Buck

[The Arapaho Kid]

Here in the Seattle area we have several malls.  The one I least like is Bell Square Mall.  This is over in a suburb of Seattle called Bellevue.  Bellevue is where all the Yuppies live.  Any time you go to Bell Square Mall...it's a parade of Yups in their designer clothing and yakking on a cell phone.  The clerks in the stores always ask:  "Which card will you be using for this purchace?"  When you tell them you are using cash...it confuses them.  I guess they forgot about money?  I usually avoid malls and try to find the items I'm looking for in a store away from a mall.

[Derby Younger]

Forty:

If you want serious aggravation, go to Williams Sonoma around Christmas. Did that just once - the store from hell.

[Trinity]

Found one on the wire that looks good, but the luck I've had........?

I want to see it first (and that ain't no dang guarantee, either.)

Goint to Williams Sonoma (another damned mall trip) Wednesday.

Oh, I understand... you want to pay too much.  Heck, if you want to pay what they want, I'll go shopping for you.  I'll get you something cheaper and make a profit for myself! 

[Curley Cole]

4Trod,

Iffn you are a goin to Williams Sonoma, then you'd be a goin to our "NEW" maul, "Victoria Gardens". this is a maul to beat all mauls....It is made to look like an old town....Sorta like Upland on hormones....

You is in for an experience, and a whole lotta yuppies, hippies and goths.....I would pay gladly to watch you traverse that maul..

Hope to see you write about yer experiences, (sotra like your trip to the Cowboys shoot, wish I would have seen ya there, would have given you my ticket, as had to leave to put Old Tops neice on the bus...)

Curley

[Cherokee Jem]

One of the only places to go in my town... boring place!!!

[Delmonico]

My worst experience in a mall was when the new one opened in SW Lincon a few years ago, kinda out in the country, but they done stretched the town out to it.  Ya know one of those used to be dark roads where a person drinkin' a bit of beer could find a dark place to ahh.................

Well my wife and I and the kids went to eat a someplace called Chili's, a step or two above a Taco Bell and with out a danged drive up window.

Well when we were done eatin' they went wanderin' and left me to wander on my own.  I found a Barnes and Noble, a useful place cause they got a section on local history and also carry gun books or at least they do here.

'Sides that I can get a decent cup a coffee there, a bit over priced but I don't mind payin' for good coffee.  It's always fun to get some and sit in Barnes and Noble with the Yuppies at Starbucks cause they ain't got nuthin' but yuppie clothing and I dress 1880's all the time.  I see the envy in their eyes, but most seem skeered of me, cause they order frappes and lattes and other foo foo drinks and I just order "a triple shot" straight up.

Ya know the fella drinkin' Pink Ladies and gold Cad-o-lacs in a bar, never mess with the guy who orders sour mash straight up.

Well there is one of these Barnes and Nobles closer to home than this one so I went 'splorin' more, didn't find nuthin' useful in the least till there it was on a sign ahead, a refuge in this worthless mall, the sign said "Abacrombie and Fitch"  a Mecca in a mall, TR shopped there in 1908 and 1909 before going to Africa, Stewart White did also, they own Griffin and Howe, even BJ and Hawkeye bought a canvas bathtub from them, Charles thought it was his cause it said Abacrombie and Fitch on it when the package came.  The holiest of outdoor outfiters had a store just ahead, I ran down the mall and went in, my jaw dropped and I ran back out and have had nightmares ever since.

(Sot of a rant Slim, but not enough.  True story though.)

[Derby Younger]

"The holiest of outdoor outfiters had a store just ahead, I ran down the mall and went in, my jaw dropped and I ran back out and have had nightmares ever since."

Ayep, enough to make a growed man cry. Long time ago, I had three favorite places in Chicago, one was Marshall Fields gun room, the other right across the street, Abercrombie.

First A&F I saw around here, it were moth to flame time..............Sad result.

Ohh, the third? Brentano's book store.

[El Peludo]

Ah, yes, Abercrombie & Fitch!  Memories of a time and place far, far away, on perhaps a different planet.  It sure ain't what it used to be.

[El Peludo]

Hey, Forty Rod, how'd ya' make out at William's-Sonoma, with the waffle iron??

[Forty Rod]

HA!!

Curly, I went out to VG this morning.  Not too bad.  I got there before the freaks were set free to roam and pillage, parked on the street about dead center, ate at Johnny Rockets, couldn't find a Williams Sonoma, then found out it's at The Mills.  In and out, 55 minutes.

The trip home on Foothill was a nightmare, though.  I couldn't get off the dang thing because of construction, idiots, and poor design and traffic light contrrol.

Never did get to The Mills.

[Derby Younger]

Ah, yes, Abercrombie & Fitch!  Memories of a time and place far, far away, on perhaps a different planet.  It sure ain't what it used to be.

And we can add Eddie Bauer, Norm Thompson, Orvis and Gokey to the list of once was great.