A night of sleep wasted.

[Daniel Nighteyes]

Excuse me, but many of the early settlers (such as my own great-great-etc-grandpap) were Irish (and Scotch), not english.  

I strongly suggest that no one should ever refer to a native from Scotland as "Scotch."  They'll tell you right away that Scotch is the distilled beverage; Scots are the people.

[J.D. Yellowhammer]

I strongly suggest that no one should ever refer to a native from Scotland as "Scotch."  They'll tell you right away that Scotch is the distilled beverage; Scots are the people.

Oh no!  That was a terrible gaffe! And me own mum of Scottish blood!  Thanks fer the correction!

[J.D. Yellowhammer]

But JD wern't the first English settlers so called Gentleman?  They found out the cound not make it on their own so they called up the others to do the work they wouldn't do.   

typical of the English....

Hell, when they fought against our Revolution they had to hire Germans!

[J.D. Yellowhammer]

Guess they could have called that clay okra.

That's some nasty stuff....

[Delmonico]

"Nuther example is a guy at work, from Illinois, gets up-set when I say Ill-a-noise, says it's Ill-a-noy.  Well been callin' it Ill-i-noise afore he was a wet spot on a mattress or a back seat. 

Worse thing is he's done been educated, gots him some degree in ag bizzness, but he ain't smart like a lot a folks I know that has them in that.  See he's the Tack Dept manager and don't know they are shaps, not chaps.

Besides that he "interned" on a ranch in Texas when he was in college.  Never heard of anyone else internin' on a ranch, 'cept maybe an accountant.   Or at least anyone else who would call it that.

Don't matter, if he don't want me to call it Ill-i-noise then they need to pass a law to get rid of the S.

[Forty Rod]

That's some nasty stuff....

Both the clay and the so-called food.

[Forty Rod]

"Nuther example is a guy at work, from Illinois, gets up-set when I say Ill-a-noise, says it's Ill-a-noy.  Well been callin' it Ill-i-noise afore he was a wet spot on a mattress or a back seat.  

Worse thing is he's done been educated, gots him some degree in ag bizzness, but he ain't smart like a lot a folks I know that has them in that.  See he's the Tack Dept manager and don't know they are shaps, not chaps.

Besides that he "interned" on a ranch in Texas when he was in college.  Never heard of anyone else internin' on a ranch, 'cept maybe an accountant.  Or at least anyone else who would call it that.

Don't matter, if he don't want me to call it Ill-i-noise then they need to pass a law to get rid of the S.

Then what are we gonna do about Are-Kansas and their spare s?   

[J.D. Yellowhammer]

There's worse riddles, tho. My wife ain't from hereabouts (she's foreign born). A coupla nights ago she asked me a question that took me back to 1st grade or so, and for which I never heard a satisfactory answer: why is Kansas City in Missouri (or Missoura)?

[Delmonico]

Then what are we gonna do about Are-Kansas and their spare s?   

Cans-us, don't see no spare s.

[litl rooster]

Besides that he "interned" on a ranch in Texas when he was in college.  Never heard of anyone else internin' on a ranch, 'cept maybe an accountant.   Or at least anyone else who would call it that.

you been hidin' under the chuck box too long......there's a big world out there past the field's of maise (some call it Corn)......cross the digital divide and you will see...yep they intern now on ranches...Security guards with college degrees. Got to be a computer genius to run a backhoe these days.  loosen your hatband a notch "grasshopper" and you will be enlightened

[Delmonico]

you been hidin' under the chuck box too long......there's a big world out there past the field's of maise (some call it Corn)......cross the digital divide and you will see...yep they intern now on ranches...Security guards with college degrees. Got to be a computer genius to run a backhoe these days.  loosen your hatband a notch "grasshopper" and you will be enlightened

OK, should have stated this better, if you were the manager of the tack dept of the largest western store in Newbrassky and was tryin' to impress these cowboys from out in the Sandhills would you say "worked on a ranch" or "interned on a ranch?"

Trust me them cowboys get a good laugh out of the "cowboy" up-stairs and tell me about it when they're down here buyin' neck-rags and Ian Tyson music.   Don't know if it impresses the horse yuppies, they don't come down and talk to me much.

[J.D. Yellowhammer]

Don't know if it impresses the horse yuppies, they don't come down and talk to me much.

No doubt they're sceered of ya! 

[Leo Tanner]

There's worse riddles, tho. My wife ain't from hereabouts (she's foreign born). A coupla nights ago she asked me a question that took me back to 1st grade or so, and for which I never heard a satisfactory answer: why is Kansas City in Missouri (or Missoura)?

Kansas City is in Kansas too.  They built the place an then drew the state line right down the middle.  Only the very northern part is divided by the river, the rest of it aint.  Just a boulavard ta tell you which side yer on.

[Delmonico]

Speakin' of the Scotts-Irish, they are the original rednecks, another abused word.  See they were mostly Presbyterians, clergy wore red collars instead of the Cathlic white, so they were rednecks.  Then it became a word to desribe folks who worked outside and sunburned their necks.  When I was in HS, a redneck was someone who hated long hairs, blacks and other minorities, now it some cuddly poor folks from down sourth that folks make bigoted jokes about in an era I'm not allowed to tell jokes about other classes of folks.

[J.D. Yellowhammer]

Kansas City is in Kansas too.  They built the place an then drew the state line right down the middle.  Only the very northern part is divided by the river, the rest of it aint.  Just a boulavard ta tell you which side yer on.

Which brings up another mystery of life:
Why did the chicken cross the road (to the MO side)?
So she could tell the little girl and dog, "Dorothy, you ain't in Kansas anymore!"

Sorry, I'm a little giddy. We got a knock on the door and there was a fedex guy, needed a signature. I was positive it was my long lost Rodeos. Who else would deliver on a Satuday, and need a signature!?  So my wife and I got over the box, slowly opened it, and it was a g.d. iron casting pot I ordered a few days ago!!!   I'm still calmin' down...

[Leo Tanner]

JD, someone's gonna be very disappointed that the box did not contain your guns.

[Forty Rod]

So, for them folks from Rogers an' Little Rock an' other places in Clinton's home state, it's not gonnas get anyone's dander up if I say AR-Kansas, with an boldly pronounced S on the back end?  HMMMM? 

(Sorry.  The devil made me do it.)

[Leo Tanner]

So, for them folks from Rogers an' Little Rock an' other places in Clinton's home state, it's not gonnas get anyone's dander up if I say AR-Kansas, with an boldly pronounced S on the back end?  HMMMM? 

(Sorry.  The devil made me do it.)

Don't ferget Connect a cut.  Or Rhode I's Land.

[litl rooster]

OK, should have stated this better, if you were the manager of the tack dept of the largest western store in Newbrassky and was tryin' to impress these cowboys from out in the Sandhills would you say "worked on a ranch" or "interned on a ranch?"

those guys and gals would know even if he stated neither

[Delmonico]

those guys and gals would know even if he stated neither

You mean the bird skin boots, the George Straight hat and the Cactus brand rope shirt wouldn't fool them?