12 Days of Government Christmas

[Mean Matt McCord]

The Department of Education, Professional Standards Commission, Office of School Achievement, and State Legislature have sent their holiday greetings to you.  As a valued educator and in the spirit of giving (aka 'Dishing It Out'), the aforementioned agencies are sending you the following cherished gifts for the season:

Twelve Days of a Government-Regulated Educational Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the second day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the third day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the forth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Four Dis-agg-ra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the fifth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the sixth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the seventh day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Seven State Assessments
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the eighth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Eight Certification Requirements
Seven State Assessments
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the ninth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Nine Performance Standards
Eight Certification Requirements
Seven State Assessments
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the tenth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Ten Days Staff Development
Nine Performance Standards
Eight Certification Requirements
Seven State Assessments
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the eleventh day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Eleven Curriculum Alignments
Ten Days Staff Development
Nine Performance Standards
Eight Certification Requirements
Seven State Assessments
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind

On the twelfth day of Christmas, the Gov'ment gives to you . . .
Twelve Budget Cuts
Eleven Curriculum Alignments
Ten Days Staff Development
Nine Performance Standards
Eight Certification Requirements
Seven State Assessments
Six State Report Cards
Five I  -- E  -- P's
Four Dis-ag-gra-ga-tions
Three E-val-u-a-tions
Two 'Needs Improvement'
And A Mandate for No Child Left Behind!   

[Micheal Fortune]

Yep, sounds about right to me, I am the child left behind.