Pete, you hit the nail on the head. Guns didn't wear evenly. 'Higher' places got more wear than 'lower' ones. The cylinder flutes wouldn't see as much wear is the rest of the cylinder. The frame would be protected from wear in front of and below and above the cylinder.
A gun carried in a holster wears differently than a gun carried in a pocket or purse, or shoved behind your belt in a waistband.
Put some cheap water soluble paint on a piece of fairly stiff cardboard, just a thin coat, and rub it very gently over the gun. Where the paint hits the metal is where you'd most likely see wear.
You can use vinegar or very dilute naval jelly (or any of a number of other things) to remove the bluing where ever there is paint. Just take off what you want to get the look you want. Most old timers didn't use a gun to death. I've seen some that were carried daily that still looked great after many years, worn but not to excess, and certainly not rusty or dirty or abused.
Go slow! If you think tou should take off just a bit more bluing, I can assure you that you're probably wrong. Let it sit for few days, then look again.
When you're done with that part, degrease the gun and put it someplace dry and bright. Let the sun work on it for a few weeks, and watch constantly for rust.
You may want to touch up some bare spots with cold blue. Follow the directions on the bottle and bring it back up toward the stock blue. This can be wiped on and off to attain the look you want. Same with Plum Brown to give it "age spots and patina". Dilute it and go slow.
The wood stocks or grips can best be 'distressed' by removing any finish and re-staining them a shade or two darker, then just toss them on the floor of your car and drive around with them rattling around for a while. Check them frequently to see they don't get too banged up. When they look right, put a protective coat of oil or Tru Oil on them and you're good to go.
Reassemble the whole thing and shove it in your holster or where evr. In a few weeks or months the metal will darken and your gun will look marvelous.
It's time consuming and that's why I don't do it any more. That, and I don't want my personal guns to look too old.
Good luck.