100 Questions For Oldtimers

[Arcey]

Naw, he n'er tolt me.

[Leo Tanner]

Well he does where his hat an boots.  Out here that makes it OK.


Leo

[Texas Lawdog]

Leo, If you were as BALD as I am, you would wear a hat or cap all the time.     Fort Worth, Texas is where the WEST begins.   Where the MEN are MEN and the WOMEN are glad of it!

[Leo Tanner]

Gotta bald spot startin that is gettin hard ta hide.  It's one of them Friar Tuck types.  Wear ma hat most of the time too, I just remember ta wear the pants.


Leo

[Delmonico]

Had a Newbrassky State Patrolman musta wanted to dance naked last Sat night in Lincoln's Near South Neighborhood, lady he offered money to dance with him was a Lincoln Police Woman.  Now on leave pending outcome.

[Forty Rod]

He never told ya he watches his NASCAR nekkid?
Leo

What does a nekkid NASCAR look like?

[Forty Rod]

Fort Worth, Texas is where the WEST begins.   Where the MEN are MEN and about half the WOMEN can kick their butts.....and make 'em like it!

[Tensleep]

What does a nekkid NASCAR look like?

Now that's ah poser ain't it?  

[Texas Lawdog]

I sorta like to watch NASCAR in my underwear. My big decision is BOXER or BRIEF?   No THONGS!

[Tensleep]

I sorta like to watch NASCAR in my underwear. My big decision is BOXER or BRIEF?   No THONGS!

That mental picture is gonna scar children not yet born.... 

[Texas Lawdog]

Not suitable for young viewers.

[Forty Rod]

I sorta like to watch NASCAR in my underwear. My big decision is BOXER or BRIEF?   No THONGS!

Yeah.  Just the thought of a NASCAR in his underwear is intimidating.

[Delmonico]

What does a nekkid NASCAR look like?

A roll cage with a motor.

[Forty Rod]

My daughter would sell her boyfriend for that cat.

[Tensleep]

My daughter would sell her boyfriend for that cat.

An' her daddy wood be ah happy man 

[Delmonico]

My daughter would sell her boyfriend for that cat.

There's some in my neighborhood, been tryin' to figger out if I could get away with shootin' a few, should I mail her one?

[Leo Tanner]

Dang it, ya guys got me ta laughin again over here.
     The neighbors is startin ta wonder.   


Lleo

[Texas Lawdog]

Cats are a little too destructive in your house, too much scratchin' on the furniture and carpets.

[Lucky Irish Tom]

TLD, you could always get one that was stuffed and mounted, that would save the wear and tear on the furniture and carpets.

[Arcey]

Had 'em a stuffed cougar in the conference room at Airfield where we did the ROII thing. Ears all laid back, lips curled showin' off them fangs. Just behind 'n to the left of the speaker. Kept hopin' he'd bite MM in the ass. Never did...